Title: It's Like Magic

Author: Kiki1770

Rating: T for Language

Summary: Arthur and Merlin embark on a dangerous quest

Setting: Season 3

A/N:Woah, needless to say, I was blown away with the reviews for the last chapter, especially since I haven't edited it. Well this is one of my favorite humor ones, and I think you've noticed by now my love for stealing lines from the show, this one especially I indulged in lines, but I hope you love anyway

Humor 4: Mary the Cook

Ever since Merlin began working for Arthur, he noticed that he spent a lot of time grumbling and cursing him. Now was one of those times. Merlin was not pleased. This was dangerous grounds. Dangerous for HIM! Arthur could get caught and the whole castle would laugh it off and the ordeal would blow over like a sneeze. But now Merlin, he was just a servant, if he were to get caught, anything from flogging, stocks, or Mary's evil ladle was awaiting his doom!

"Arthur, you're the prince. I'm sure if you asked nicely, Mary would gladly give you one of her pies." Merlin grumbled for the fifth time that night. And just like the previous four times, Arthur replied with the same prattish smirk.

"Where's the fun in that Merlin? Come on, then. Learn to live a little," Arthur chuckled, and proceeded to lower the grappling hook down the vent to capture Mary's cream pies.

"Trust me prat, between saving your loyal backside and mucking your stables, I live plenty."

"You forgot to include the incessant amount of time you seem to spend in the tavern." Arthur snorted only half paying attention to his manservant. He continued to lower the grappling hook in another attempted to get her pie, but sighed in frustration when Mary approached her pies in admiration once more.

"This isn't working! I swear those pie are more tightly guarded than the vaults of Camelot!"Merlin nodded in agreement. His history spoke for itself, the number times he broke into the vaults far outweighed the how many pies he'd managed to nick from Mary. (He stole a grand total of four in the last THREE years!) Merlin took this as sign that Arthur might give up. NOT! Merlin gulped as soon Arthur got that mischievous look in his eyes.

"Oh no, I know that look. I'm not gonna like this am I?"

"Don't be such a girl Merlin, now go in there and distract her!"

"How do I do that?"

"I don't know! Flatter her or something!"

"You. Want. Me. To. Flirt. With. Her? Are you bloody insane?"

"Shut up and get in there!" Arthur dragged Merlin all the way down the kitchens and shoved him inside. Merlin skittered to stop in front of the scary cook.

"You!" She exclaimed, pointing a beefy accusing finger in Merlin's face. Merlin smiled sheepishly, but panicked when she brought up the evil ladle. Without thinking, his magic came to his aid and bashed the crazed cooks head against one of her kitchen pans.

"Whoops," Merlin whispered when she was knocked out cold. Arthur reappeared when he heard the crash. He looked flabbergasted.

"I said distract her! Not knock her out!"

"There's just no pleasing you, is there?"

"Not when it takes the challenge out of the prank!"

"She was gonna use the ladle! I had to defend myself,"

"…You're braver than you look, Merlin. Now go grab those pies!"

"Right, so you pin the whole thing on a servant,"

"Apparently smarter than you look too."

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Kiki1770