thank you for those that reviewed the last chapter, much love :') xx

enjoy! :D

Dean woke early the next day feeling well rested, despite himself he couldn't help but look around the room, he felt deflated when he found that Cas wasn't there but he wasn't really expecting him to be, he hadn't seen hide nor hair of him since he left the angel under the tree at the park, come to think of it knowing Cas, Dean wouldn't be surprised if he was still there. The hunter got out of bed and after getting washed and dressed he slipped out to ring Cas, leaving a sleeping Sam behind.

The hunter lent against his baby as he speed dialled the angel, no answer Dean hung up when his voice mail came and instantly tried again, this repeated five times before Dean was well and truly entering stalker territory so he reluctantly shoved his phoned back into his pocket and stood staring at the ground for a few minutes.

"Cas? Can you hear me? Answer your damn phone. Just checking in and-" Dean stopped in mid prayer he realised he had no really reason to call him, Dean quickly glanced around happy that Cas hadn't appeared because that would have been awkward. The hunter sighed he walking back into the motel room to fetch his keys and get breakfast. Little did he know that Cas had been standing by his side since the first ring of his mobile, he held his phone in his hand as it rang, he muffled the sound so it couldn't reatch human ears just like he did with him being visible, he stared at the growing concern and annoyance in his charges face, it was most puzzling.

When Dean started to prayed his stomach fell as it always did, granted it wasn't the most graceful prayer, but it was still a prayer. Maybe Dean was right he had made a difference to him. There is a difference between knowing and believing and even though Dean knows for a fact that things are real, some small part of him also believes it and wants to believe in it, wants faith and Cas had given that to him, Cas smiled as he watched Dean walked into the room and back out a second later.

The angel made the decision not to appear to Dean he was blushing just by looking at him when he couldn't be seen, if Dean actually looked at him and caught his eye, Cas' embarrassment and discomfort would surly make Dean suspicious of something even if he didn't know what and if anyone could get information out of him it was Dean.

When Dean was in the driving seat and had fired up the impala Cas forced himself to fly to Egypt, far enough away so he won't have to worry about bumping into him, talking to him, looking at him even smelling him, he couldn't risk it, not until he had everything figured out once and for all. He sat on the sand and looked at the pyramids, they looked so old, he remembers when they were built how impressive and majestic they were, he was getting old the angel thought. Cas examined the pyramids and how weak they seemed, only echoes of former glory, Cas could relate.

A rider of a passing camel gave him a funny look but just carried on his way, the angel looked up the glowing silver moon and took comfort that Dean shared the same one, he had to stop this Cas told himself. A moment later a group of well of women walked past the run down angel and they didn't even give him a second look, a second later an old beggar man came up to Cas and ask in his language if he was okay Cas answer in the same tongue and told him he was fine, the old man pulled out a small lump of bread from his ragged trousers and gave it to Cas. A lump got lodged in the angels throat, a man with nothing gives all of has to help a stranger when those with everything give nothing, always the way. Poor self sacrificing bastard, where ever he goes he can't escape Dean fucking Winchester. Cas stood up in front of the poor man and gave his food back before enchanting an enochian chant into the mans ear, giving him hope though he didn't know what was spoken. Cas then swiped his wings and disappeared before the mans eyes he looked down to the bread in his hands and in its place were gold coins. The old man fell to his knees and professed his love to the lord, whom he was sure had just visited him.

The angel flew to no where in particular, he just flew around the world through the sky. He had to know, there was no way he couldn't. All this time waiting for Dean to smile in his sleep but never knowing the dream that created such beauty. Although it meant breaking his promise he was going to visit Dean tonight, he had to if only for closure so he could start to put all of this ugly mess behind him. The next moment he stood in the motel room he was hoping that the brothers would be asleep he couldn't be more wrong.

The angel felt his heart squeezed tightly inside his chest as his eyes instantly fell to Dean lying on his bed, his face making all the same delectable faces from the other night and some of the same noises though not as many, only his time both his hands were behind his head and some blonde girl's mouth was wrapped around his cock. Cas mouth fell open he shouldn't feel betrayed he has no call to feel that, so what was this pang inside him? He should look away fly way before he's seen but he was frozen, staring at the whore pleasuring Dean.

The hunters eyes fluttered open and instantly caught Cas', Dean didn't register this for a moment because he closed his eyes again before pushing the girl off and yanking his boxers back up and jumping to his feet, looking flushed.

"What the hell are you doing here!" Dean shouted in a huffed pissed off whisper, his harsh eyes instantly softened as he saw Cas squirm uncomfortably with the situation.

"I'm sorry, I thought, I just came from Egypt. I must have mix up times." Cas stumbled over his words as he looked as the wall, anything but Dean's half naked body in front of him.

"It's alright, don't sweat it. But you have the worst timing ever dude." Dean couldn't hide his smirk as he gestured with his head to the girl on his bed; she only had her underwear on if you could call the two inches of material underwear.

Cas was sure he wouldn't be able to speak but he opened his mouth away, thankfully the girl on the bed who was very drunk stumbled towards them and draped herself over Dean. Most probably for support so she didn't topple over but Cas couldn't help but feel a strange urge to punch her, which would technically kill her.

"Is this Sammy, Deanie? Doesn't look like you said. He's short and cute." Cas glared at Dean because if he looked at the women he would flip. Cas flushed red from embarrassment also anger how dare she be so patronising he could smite her right now, it would be so easy he thought, it used to be, now he has that blasted guilt thing to deal with. Dean saw the discomfort and annoyance in the angel's eyes but despite himself could not fine this funny.

"No, no this is Cas."

"Okay? Why is he?"

"I'll go." Cas assured the true and took a step back.

"If you wanted a third you just had to ask Deanie." The woman slurred as he looked the man standing awkwardly in the middle of the room up and down.

"What." Both hunter and angel exclaimed hardly believing what just came from her mouth. The blonde bimbo simply looked to Dean and blow him a kiss as she flashed her breasts even more, if that's possible. Dean was left dumbstruck, what the fuck was going on. "Don't you want a little fun?" she whispered in his eye before licking his neck making the hunter shudder at the contact, making Cas' jaw tense as he watched.

She then stumble towards Cas, against his better judgment he caught her when she fell, she wouldn't let him go, the drunk woman put her arms around Cas' shoulder and wrapped on leg around his waist, making him shift very anxiously on his feet.

"Come on baby." She wished again before letting him go and taking of her panties so she stood naked in the middle fo the two man, Cas' eyes widened as he looked back to the wall determind not to get sucked into the situation, he just wanted to find Dean asleep not about to have sex with some random girl it was getting to much. "You don't want me?"

"Alright that's enough." Dean barked and he pulled the girl back away from Cas. "You're making him uncomfortable." The girl just rolled her eyes, but soon found that the sudden movement Dean put her through was not a good idea because she ran to the bathroom to throw up. The two men caught each others eyes,

"Classy." He didn't mean to say it with such vulgarity but he couldn't seem to care when he had.

"Don't start Cas. Why are you here?"

"It was my mistake. I'll leave you to it. To her." The angel turned so his back was to the half naked Dean, who's form he found it hard not to look at. Dean understood why this would be awkward for Cas, hell he felt his pain and more but Dean didn't understand why he sounded so bitter.

"Cas are you okay?" the hunter asked as he approached the angel and placed a hand on his shoulder. The angel enjoy the contact for a moment before stepping away from him and without turning back around he bid his farewell.

"Fine. Enjoy your night." Gone, Dean was left staring at an empty space as something in his stomach started to churn. He didn't want Cas to join them he knew that, it would be way too awkward plus for Cas' first time hardly fitting for an angel, but he still didn't want him to go.

"Dammit." He mumbled to himself before turning to watch the naked drunk women stumble towards him, yeah she was hot but he just wasn't feeling it anymore, something must be wrong he thought, he wasn't backing out now besides she started jacking him off before she even spoke, she was so ready for it.

"Where'd he go?"

"left us to it babe." Dean whispered in response and smiled a cocky seductive smile that felt forced and cold, he wasn't going to let himself, not tonight. Tonight he was getting laid for real. "Let's go." Dean grunted as he pulled the girls legs up around his waist and carried her to his bed.

Cas stayed to see Dean take her to bed, though invisible he stayed he had to see it for himself before he was ready to believe it and he couldn't even when he did. Between the fast pace of the hunters heart beat that the angel was listening to intently he found himself back to that park bench a few states over, where was sat before he had started this whole thing.

How could Dean give himself to that, that whore. How she acted and spoke he deserves better, much better. He knew he had no right to feel that horribly familiar sting of jealous, of anger but for the life of him he couldn't stop it.

Cas' eyes felt hot he brought his left hand to rub his eye, and there in the corner of his left eye was a tear, a hot salty tear. Cas sat staring at his fingers that held his first tear. He remembered what he told Dean when Dean referred to him crying; 'I'm an angel, I don't think it possible. But yes, everything is starting to take its toll. If I could and if I knew how, I think I would cry.' Dean Winchester reduced an angel to tears, tears that he was certain could never fall, alive for a millennia seen all there is to see, seen wars death and heart beak, countless bad things happen to good people and this, this is the thing to make him cry. Dean Winchester in the arms of another. It wasn't right, none of this was right he told himself.

sorry but i had to have a good samaritan thing in here and the whole professing love thing lol

poor cas, he finds out that angels can cry after all. i know Dean's being Dean and isnt cheating or anything god Dean's a jerk ;P

oh next chapter his picking up, Cas is finally going to have a peak behind the certain to Dean's dreams :O lol

Please review :D xxx