All characters and the rights to Scandal belong to Ms. Shonda Rhimes.
After writing this chapter I realized not a whole lot of inappropriateness happening but hey that's life lol. Next chapter will be some juiciness I promise Gladiators! Now sit back and enjoy the second part of this wonderful chapter ! :)
Like a pendulum Olivia paced back and forth causing Fitz to get dizzy because he was sitting on the couch watching her. She had in her hands on her hips; her hair was no longer straight but wavier since her encounter with Fitz and she could feel a headache coming on. Despite all those things she was determined to get this hashed out and over with quickly.
"I'm not even going to pretend to be sorrier than I already am so there's no need to start with another apology. Should I even ask if you want me to start from the beginning I mean you are on a timed schedule are you not?"
Fitz sat hunched over with his legs spread apart and his elbows resting on his knees as he watched Olivia pace back and forth. He was over caring what others wanted him to do, how they wanted him to act, and most of all how they wanted him to live his own damn life. Since the assassination attempt he was a changed man and even more so after the last 10 months so following his planned agenda was like telling him to go on a 5 mile run which was not happening at all.
"I really want to know why you let Hollis, Verna, Mellie and Cyrus bully you into agreeing to go along with the rigging. You're too smart for that shit Liv!" Fitz stayed seated on the couch but sat up straighter.
Olivia turned toward Fitz, looking him in the face. The moment of truth had come; she knew that would be the question of the day.
" It's funny you ask that question because it was clear what everyone else wanted out of the deal and Lord knows I wanted to be the good guy in the group, wear the white hat and such but I caved at the last possible moment. Not a proud moment for me because I've felt guilty about my part in the entire thing, but I don't regret you becoming President or the wonderful things you've already accomplished in your two and half years."
Olivia paused taking a steady hand and brushing a stray piece of hair away from her eye before continuing her story. Fitz remained silent.
"Anyway the answer to your question was your happiness plain and simple. Don't sit there and say I made you happy or that I'm lying because I'm not." Olivia interrupted Fitz before he could even say a word.
"No matter how much you may want to deny it I wanted your happiness more so than my own which is still true to this day, unfortunately. I didn't know how miserable and bitter you would become while being President or else I might have stopped the entire thing. Then who knows where we'd be now?" Olivia finished with a sigh and took a seat on the overstuffed chair across from Fitz.
The room had an eerie calmness to it which was sort of soothing and filled with a comfortable silence between the on again off again star crossed lovers.
Shifting ever so slightly Fitz finally spoke.
"What hurts the most is the fact that you didn't trust me enough to come to me and discuss the facts with me. I mean damn Olivia it wouldn't have been the worst thing for me to not have won. We could be living in California off the coast somewhere enjoying the beach in our backyard, watching our children running around mini versions of both of us.
"You remember the house with the wraparound porch, wind chimes hanging near the porch swing? Whatever happened to that woman who wasn't afraid to dream and always came up with a solution to a hard problem?"
Fitz had stood up from the couch by now and was standing in the middle of the room facing Olivia. The angry tears behind his eyes threatened to spill but he refused to release them because he wasn't going to be a broken man any longer.
"I remember Fitz, but how the hell would we have made it possible with you still being married to that bitch Mellie? That's not the issue anyway so let's not get off topic. Before you found out about Defiance you were happy correct?"
"Yes, while you were still around I was very happy, but…"
Olivia shook her head and cut him off.
"Alright next question, do you honestly think you would've been happy without winning the election, and be honest now Fitz? I know you remember and you know me so honesty is important to rebuild what we both broke."
No one had really asked him that question before and he wasn't sure he had the right answer. Yes it may have been planted in his head as a little seed when he was younger but he grew the dream of becoming President himself. When he became governor of California it didn't seem so far off to run for President and then shortly after it became a reality that was close at hand.
Could he actually say he would be happy if he didn't win the Presidency despite having Olivia by his side even if it was in the shadows and not in the light how he wanted it to be for the world to see?
"Yes because we would be together now. The divorce would have happened after losing the election, we would have Jerry and Karen because Lord knows Mellie can't even tolerate her own children. No paparazzi, no cameras, no chief of staff, no major scandals at least on our part. Best of all it would just be us Livvy."
That was a beautiful picture he painted for them and maybe if fate was on their side and the timing was better then she'd believe it but Olivia was a realist and didn't like to get her hopes too high only for them to be burst like bubbles.
Standing up Olivia met Fitz in the middle of the room, when she got to him she cautiously placed a hand on his cheek and watched as he closed his eyes and finally let the tears he'd been holding back fall.
"I love you Fitzgerald Thomas Grant III forever and always. Do I make mistakes? God knows I do but I'm only human and the pedestal you've put me on is now gone in your eyes and I think that hurts more than anything because it was never there in the first place.
"Now I understand your feelings of betrayal and what could have been but baby I'm here to tell you that despite all we've been through and what we're going through now I'm staying in this fight till the very fucking end."
Fitz had only heard Olivia cuss during the campaign or when they made love and those times it was either out of frustration, anger or pleasure. So when he heard her tonight it was out of determination and he was touched because for once it was her fighting for them and trying to pull him along for the ride.
A small smile was beginning to tug at the corners of his lips which he couldn't help.
This woman standing in front of him was incredible no one said it was going to be easy and he knew for a fact that nothing was ever easy with Olivia Pope.
"I'm still angry about the rigging, I'm disappointed in the fact that you of all people couldn't trust to help and most of all I'm frustrated with my damn life and the shitty decisions that brought me where I am today. I will say I saw the night going in another direction but hell this cleared a lot of things up for me."
Fitz wrapped his arms around Liv's waist and pulled her closer to him.
Olivia chuckled when he spoke about his plans for the evening.
"Well that could always be fixed, for another night Mr. President," she brushed her thumb over his cheek wiping away a stray tear.
Fitz squeezed her waist causing her take in a breath.
"I'd like that Ms. Pope but know I have a lot of frustration and anger to work out. You think you up to the challenge because it's not one to take on lightly?"
Olivia knew he was referring to their relationship and that it was going to be a journey to get back to where they were but hell what was love if not painful, devastating, difficult, life-changing and extraordinary?
"Hell yes Mr. President, bring it on."