Monday, April 7th, 2014.
Well, I was right about one thing from yesterday's entry, 'cause my life nearly ended today.
Our reinforcements arrived. Seeing how seriously Operation Rising Sun is being treated right now, I actually expected them to come on time, and luckily, I wasn't let down. I delayed training for today, since I wanted the fleet to train with the reinforcements.
Destroyer Harusame (春雨, "Spring Rain", not vermicelli). That pink hair though.
Destroyer Hayashimo (早霜, "Early Frost"). Looks a bit creepy with her hair over her eye like that.
Destroyer Naganami (長波, "Long Waves). Her hair is fucking cool, I love it.
Destroyer Urakaze (浦風, "Sea Wind" or something like that). Awesome beret.
Destroyer Yayoi (弥生, "March" in archaic Japanese). Quiet.
Submarine I-58. Dechi, dechi, dechi.
Submarine I-19. Nano, nano, nano.
Submarine Tender Taigei (大鯨, literally "Great Whale"). Uncanny resemblance to Shigure's Kai 2. A lot.
Light Cruiser Abukuma (阿武隈, named for the Abukuma river). Are those hair rings?
Light Cruiser Kuma (球磨, named for the Kuma river). Kuma, kuma, kuma.
Light Cruiser Tama (多摩, named for the Tama river). Nya, nya, nya.
Light Cruiser Noshiro (能代, named for the Noshiro river). A bit more relaxed version of Yahagi but still got the austere professionalism.
Heavy Cruiser Aoba (青葉, named for Mt. Aoba). Why does she have a camera?
Heavy Cruiser Nachi (那智, named for Mt. Nachi). That ponytail though.
Heavy Cruiser Kumano (熊野, named for the Kumano river). A calmer, more controllable version of Suzuya who actually listens to me.
Seaplane Tender Akitsushima (秋津洲, alternate name for Japan). Why does that boat she always carries around have a face?
Battlecruiser/Standard Carrier Hybrid Amagi (天城, named for Mt. Amagi). Very interesting hybrid ship concept, and the only one of her kind to have two roles in one. Akagi was super happy to see her. And damn she's tall, almost taller than me.
Light Carrier Zuihou (瑞鳳, or "Auspicious Phoenix"). Shouhou bawled her eyes out seeing her.
Armored Carrier Taihou (大鳳, or "Great Phoenix"). The only armored carrier of her kind so far, but surprisingly short for a carrier.
Standard Carrier Hiryuu (飛龍, or "Flying Dragon"). Took one glance at her and immediately guessed she'd be Souryuu's sister, and I was right.
With this roster, we now have 18 destroyers (3 Kai, 1 Kai 2), 4 submarines (1 Kai), 1 submarine tender, 11 light cruisers (3 Kai), six heavy cruisers (1 Kai), 4 battleships (Amagi included), 1 seaplane tender, 3 light carriers (Houshou included), 5 standard carriers (Amagi included), and 2 supply ships.
After helping the newcomers move their stuff and equipment into the base and letting them have an hour or so reuniting with long-lost friends and ship sisters, I called everyone together for a general assembly out on the docks in front of the training waters, with the newcomers lined up in parade formation in front of me and the rest of the old fleet standing by on either side. The new ship girls were pretty nervous - their faces with written with the word as they saw me walk up in front of them, the two swords on my belt, my pistol in my leather holster, my military coat hanging over my shoulders in the stereotypical yakuza-casual style manner, and my Carrier Strike Group 10 naval cap sitting on my head. I suppose my image then was that of a hardline American naval commander who'd beat any signs of insubordination down to the ground.
I went ahead and introduced myself to the newcomers, my naval background and my credentials and shit like that. Not that I had to, but more to let the newcomers know a bit more about me. The moment I started speaking Japanese, I saw the faces of the new ship girls contort with surprise. They totally weren't expecting an American naval commander to speak Japanese, and fluent Japanese at that. Well, fluent enough to understand seemlessly, anyway. But at least their surprise wasn't the condescending type of surprise, like the "oh, you know how to speak Japanese? Well, shit" kind of surprise, more the "Oh, you know how to speak Japanese, cool!" kind of surprise. Just in case there might be a few misunderstandings about that.
I gave the newcomers a brief rundown of everything that had happened so far in the last few months, what I knew about Operation Rising Sun, and my objectives as their new naval commander. I made it clear that I was more approachable than I seemed, and that most important of all, over all the orders I'd been given by HQ or the Moebius Four Pact, my personal objective was to do my best to ensure that the entire fleet would survive to see another day.
Just as I wrapped up that speech, Toyoda the Akita dog came barking and bounding down the harbor, chasing after a seagull. Ooyodo realized this too late and was going to chase Toyoda down to stop him, but just as he came running by me, I swiftly stooped down and snatched him off the ground and held him in my arms. I introduced the new girls to our resident dog, Toyoda, and that he was Ooyodo's pet that we got for her on her launch day. Toyoda kept batting at my face with his paw while I was introducing him, pissed that I'd interrupted his fun and trying to get me to put him down, so I set him down again and let him run off. I also told the newcomers about the two cats we also had at base, Error's cat Batsubyou and Akebono's cat Chika. I asked if anyone had any particular pet allergies, but as soon as I asked that, I realized that was a dumb question - ship girls don't get sick or have allergies. I think the fact that it was clear that I was chill with having pets at base really helped take away a lot of the nervousness that the new ship girls had, because they loosened up a lot after I let Toyoda go and do his thing.
Then, the destroyer Hayashimo asked me where Kiyoshimo was.
The hammer got dropped on me, hard.
Hayashimo said that Kiyoshimo was supposed to have been deployed to this base a month or so ago, but when she searched around the base, she couldn't find her. She asked me where she was right now - perhaps she was off on a separate assignment?
I glanced around at the rest of the fleet. My initial reaction thought was why the old fleet didn't already tell Hayashimo what had happened. But when I saw their cringing faces averting away from Hayashimo, I sympathized with them. Nobody wanted to be that guy who tells someone the dreadful news. Therefore, as acting naval commander, that's my responsibility.
I took a deep breath, looked Hayashimo in the eyes, and said:
"In the first morning hours of March 20th, destroyer Kiyoshimo was killed in combat. She received too much damage to her internal systems, and her main processing unit was destroyed. The fleet brought her body back, but we concluded that there was no way to revive her. She is now considered sunk and has been permanently decommissioned. I'm sorry, Hayashimo."
Hayashimo sunk to her knees where she stood and buried her face in her hands. She didn't cry, she didn't scream. She just knelt there, not looking at anything.
On this depressing note, I informed the horrified new ship girls of the battles that the fleet had been through so far. I told them that judging by the nature of this war, some of them, including members of the old fleet, would die in the future, perhaps even become sunk. We've had five ship girls get killed in combat: Ooi, Imuya, Samidare, Yuudachi, and Kiyoshimo - with Kiyoshimo being the permanent fatality. I told them that even though it would still be possible to reconstruct and revive ship girls killed in combat, such revives would only be possible if their main processing units were kept pristine and their bodies were returned to base so that our repair team could come to pick them up for their reconstructive surgeries. I told them that we wouldn't know if we'd have more ship girls who would end up like Kiyoshimo in the future. This was the nature of this fleet, and I needed the new girls to toughen up as much as possible, because there were going to be deaths. That's why my objectives focus on the prioritization of the safety of the fleet above all else.
When I stopped speaking again, Hayashimo looked up at me. She looked like muddafackin' Sadako comin' outta the TV set. She accused me harshly of sending Kiyoshimo to her death. If I hadn't sent Kiyoshimo on that sortie, she wouldn't've died. If it weren't for me being the commander of this base, she'd still have her ship sister with her, alive, and not dead. Hayashimo would've preferred to continue living hundreds of kilometers away from her ship sisters if it meant she could bring them back to life, because at the very least they'd still be alive. She'd been looking forward to being deployed here to see Kiyoshimo again, only to finally come and be told to her face that the one person she wanted to see was dead, without even getting a chance to see the body at the very least.
"TAKE RESPONSIBILITY!"
Those were the last two words Hayashimo screamed at me, and by that point, she finally started breaking down and crying.
So I pulled out the Beretta in my homemade handgun holster. The fleet became alarmed, even though they shouldn't've been, since what the hell's a 9mm bullet gonna do to a ship girl who can withstand cannon rounds. But I put the loaded gun, flicking the safety off, on the ground and slid it across over to Hayashimo, and it bumped against her knee to get her attention.
I ordered Hayashimo to pick up that gun and shoot me.
At this, the entire fleet freaked the fuck out, especially the veteran ship girls. Samidare reacted extremely violently, understandably, and tore herself away from her place in formation and put herself between me and Hayashimo, screaming that she wouldn't allow me to die. Shigure, Yuudachi, and Ooyodo, too, came to my defense, but I yelled at them to stand down and step aside, which they all eventually did, except for Samidare, who still held the ends of my military coat.
One of the new ship girls, Akitsushima, dared to break the new girls' shocked silence and asked me why I was doing something like this. I replied that too many a time I'd seen a situation like this, and rarely does anyone actually or adequately "take responsibility". So I figured I may as well make an example of myself and take up the challenge.
Then I glanced back at Hayashimo and told her that I had a few things to say first before she pulled the trigger. Before this post, I was a carrier commander in the American Navy. For the last two years, I'd seen, fought, and commanded dozens of battles in naval conflicts everywhere from the seas bordering the Middle East all the way down to the coasts of South Africa, fighting insurgents, pirates, and terrorists. I'd already ordered hundreds of brave men and women, sailors and soldiers in my carrier group to their deaths to achieve the victories that I'd brought to my Navy and had the incredible fortune to still survive until this day. If Hayashimo wanted to end my life so that Kiyoshimo's death can be avenged, then so be it. After all, a survivor's luck can only carry you so far. I guess it's just karma, finally circling all the way back to ultimately make me pay for all those lives I've ended. I told Hayashimo that I should've died a long time ago, that I'd already lived my life to its fullest. Everything up until this point since a few years back was all just a pure bonus for which I was grateful to have experienced.
To end it, I told Hayashimo that I had taken out all the bullets in that gun except for one. She had one chance, and that was it. If she botched her chance, she wouldn't have another free opportunity like this. And either way, by shooting and attacking, possibly killing, a superior officer, Hayashimo was going to certainly be decommissioned and scrapped.
Either way, Hayashimo shot me in the chest. Right in between my spine and right lung and chunking off a part of my right lung in the process. Good thing the ship girls don't know how to shoot guns, unless their name is Yamato or Shigure.
I've been shot before by a nine mil. It sucks, it hurts, and it's a bitch - but it's better than getting shot by an M43 or .45 ACP. But the bullet did knock me over, and instantly Shigure beat Hayashimo down and kicked my pistol out of her hand and started to thrash her, but I got up as quick as I could and ordered Shigure to stand down, which she reluctantly did. It's not like the bullet hit a major artery, but it did it the edge of my lung, so I was having difficulty breathing already. Nothing I haven't experienced before, though.
Since I'd have to be treated immediately, I told Akashi to head first into the medbay to get the surgical equipment ready. The bullet hadn't passed through entirely, since I didn't feel an exit wound, so it needed to be taken out. I dismissed the fleet for the day and told the veteran ship girls to show the new girls around while I went inside and got the damn bullet taken out of me.
So I got to spend a few hours in the medbay while Akashi extracted the bullet and closed my wounds, telling me how close I was to becoming handicapped from the chest down. Guess I dodged a bullet there. No, not really, that pun doesn't work.
I took it slow for the rest of the day, but I managed to get through it well enough. Got a few sleep attacks while I was in my office doing the daily paperwork with Ooyodo's help, as my body was trying to force me to go to sleep so that it could get to work fixing up the damaged tissue, but I stuck with it. Akebono brought me warm tea and apricots, asking me if she ought to call me Maso-Admiral, for "Masochist Admiral" instead of Shitty Admiral. I told her I'd rather go with Shitty Admiral, since that wasn't out of masochism that I let Hayashimo put a bullet in me.
After training for the rest of the day after that chaotic general fleet assembly, Samidare, Shigure, Yuudachi, and Harusame, their new ship sister, kept tagging along, afraid that I'd just fall over dead at any moment if they didn't keep their eyes on me. Harusame is like a more frantic and nervous Samidare, and she was profoundly shocked that I'd even allowed myself to get shot like that. Lots of the new girls, too, came to see if I was doing alright after earlier this morning. Amagi even offered to nurse me personally if I ever requested it, which makes me wonder what kind of superior she's had over in the mainland who would ask for personal nursing.
The one thing I'm worried about is Hayashimo. I bear no grudge towards her whatsoever. I've run into many of my own soldiers who've felt the same way, blaming me for the deaths of comrades or friends when I sent them on a mission. Even some families of the servicemen and servicewomen who've died while serving aboard my carrier strike group unit demanded that I get off their property when I traveled to personally inform them of their loved ones' deaths in the line of duty. Hayashimo's reaction is nothing new, and I understand what she must feel. The problem is that most of the other girls in the fleet don't share this same sentiment, especially those who have taken a liking to me already. Shigure's already punched Hayashimo in the face a couple times from when Hayashimo first shot, me, and Yuudachi bares her fangs at her whenever she passes. Even Samidare glares at Hayashimo whenever she sees her. And the rest of the girls, too, most of them just try to ignore her or shun her away for what she did earlier in the morning. Their sentiment is that even though Kiyoshimo, Hayashimo's ship sister, had died, it wasn't like killing me was going to bring her back, nor would it solve any problem in particular. So the general consensus on Hayashimo's decision to shoot me among the fleet seems to be one of disapproval of Hayashimo's decision, and they think it was immature and whimsical and done only for the instant gratification of revenge.
But this'll mean that Hayashimo will sink further and further into her own quagmire of murderous thoughts, shocked sadness over Kiyoshimo's loss, and numb coldness from being perpetually alone. Not only will this mean bad things for the fleet whenever I deploy them and the girls need to cooperate with a fellow comrade with whom they don't want to fight, but Hayashimo herself may end up auto-terminating herself. I really don't need another episode of Shigure's mad suicide again, I really don't.
Tomorrow, I'm going to go see Hayashimo and make sure she's not going to off herself, first and foremost. Then, I need to convince the rest of the fleet that Hayashimo doesn't deserve the kind of treatment that she's getting. I don't know if I can pull it off, but for the sake of the fleet as a whole, and as commander of this fleet, I have to try.
I've been saying "as the commander of this fleet" or bullshit like that a lot recently. Well, I guess it's fine, by this point I've already become that generic harem anime protagonist now, except I've had to take about four bullets to the chest to pull it off. I can hear Rito, Riki, Tomoya, Yuuichi, and all the lot callin' out to me, "one of us, one of us"...