Already Home
(A Great Big World)
...
Distance makes the heart grow fonder. Sometimes, the best way to appreciate something, is to be without it for a while. She has been with Piper for almost four years now. In those years together they had their fair share of ups and down. Their downs consist mostly of people around them. Unbeknownst to them people have always put an expiry date on their relationship. Early on, a lot have believed that it won't last. They're young, attractive and both are really on the best shape of their careers. After all, two attractive women on their mid 20s always attract unwanted attention. Their ups had been about them. They proved everyone wrong when they moved in together on the two years since they've been dating. They equally showed that whoever comes that displayed interest on either of them would never stood a chance. This is real. Their love always feels warm and content. Days seem to be more happier than the previous as they grow closer to each other. Of course there had been some fights, but she has been the blonde's safe haven to explode and she always knew that the blonde is her secure place to break. She had met her family and Piper met her mom. Though her relationship to Piper's family is nothing compares to what the blonde's bond to her mom, she can say that most of the time she has spent with the Chapman's had been decent.
Alone in LA, now she longs for her in these wee hours of the night. It's 12mn, which means probably 3am in NY. Alex was assign by the company she works in to foresee the completion of their construction project. The project will bring millions to the company. Being the senior architect that she is, their management decided to send her to supervise the construction. She's been there for two months and needed to stay for six months more. Needless to say she misses the blonde too much. Days before she leaves, Piper changes her mind on letting Alex go. She suddenly refuses to let her leave and threw an uncalled-for tantrum. After much convincing from Alex that they'll talk everyday, nothing will change and they will see each other through video calls and all, she reluctantly agrees. This is by far going to be the longest time they'll be away from each other and the blonde was scared. She is too but never really showed it. Was this the start of their inevitable ending? Those that have peopled been foreseeing? Their phone calls, messages and video calls seems to ease the longing they feel, but tonight is different for Alex. She does not always let her emotions rule the best of her but tonight she misses the blonde far too much. She decided to call and tries to at least hear the blonde's voice on the other line.
"Hello?" a croaky Piper answers after the fourth ring.
"Hi kid. Sorry, I wake you." Alex answers. Lying in her bed she faces the left side of her king size bed. Piper always takes the left side of their bed, saying she sleeps better on it.
"What's wrong babe?" Piper says anxiously. They've talked a while before when Alex took her dinner. Their phone calls usually last an hour or so, just chatting about their day and eventually a lot of teasing and "I miss you" in between.
"I just…ugh…this is stupid." She rumbles.
"What is…missing me?" Piper teases. Alex laughs and exhales on the other end.
"Yes Pipes." Alex answers back. Hinting a sad tone on it, Piper releases her breath.
"I miss you too Al. This is hard, I wish you were here." She told Alex.
"I know. Me too." Alex answers back as she hugs the pillow that has Piper's shirt.
"Do you sleep with my shirt?" Piper remembers that she took one of her old t-shirt and dabs some of her perfume on it.
"No. It's on one of my pillows. I won't wear it for I have to wash it, then your smell will be gone." She answers with her raspy bedroom voice that sends shivers to Piper and makes her miss the brunette more.
"Hmmm…but it's the same babe. You still need to wash it eventually." Piper says as she stretch on her bed.
"Yeah…I drool on it last night." Alex says as she hears Piper giggles on the other line.
"Sing for me." She fondly says to Alex. Alex can't sing, she knows this but their conversation makes her long for the brunette more than she normally does and she feels emotional so she tries to put some distraction on it. Alex feels it too so she complies.
"You make me smile like the sun…fall out of bed…Sing like a bird, dizzy in my head, spin like a record…crazy on a Sunday night. You make me dance like a fool, forget how to breathe…" Alex sings off key as she always does making Piper laugh audibly in the darkness of their room. Alex eventually chuckles with her too. Eventually their laughter's die as silence seizes both ends of the call.
"I fucking love you." Piper says after a while as she buries her beaming smile on her pillow.
"I fucking love you too babe…. wait for me…just…182 days more." Alex answers with longing but felt that her mood has somewhat lightens. Piper tells her "always" and the rest of their conversation dies naturally through the night as they listen to each other's heavy breathing. The rest of the week passes by with phone calls, text message and video calls between them.
...
Alex seems to be busier as the completion of their project nears. On the sixth month away from each other the length of their phone conversations becomes shorter, text messages seems to be the obligatory meal updates and video calls once a week. Piper understands the loads of Alex's work so rarely did the blonde complain about the lesser time they spent together. She mostly just puts her attention to her store that she co-manages with Polly. Popi is doing well as they had made an expansion on some retail stores around their area. Most of her day was spent on the store and meeting with possible clients. On Friday's Popi usually closes around 8pm. She's on the counter when her phone buzzes with a message. She glances at the store to see anyone needing assistance then sees only Polly and a customer chatting about their product. She took out her phone and sees it's Alex.
'Hey kid. Are you busy?'
'Hey. Not really but still in the store. It's Friday we closes at 8 remember?' she texted back.
'Yeah I remember. So, the team decided to go out tonight I might call late at midnight once I reach home.'
'And by the team you mean who?'
'The guys, Naomi and me.'
She had been hearing that name for a while now. Alex always mentions her. "Naomi asks if I could accompany her" "Naomi and I closes late tonight" Naomi invited us for lunch" "She gave me a ride today when the company car broke down." Suddenly Naomi seems to always be around. Alex tells her on one occasion that her and Naomi's closeness didn't mean anything and she was just being a nice co-worker when Piper once threw a jealous rage on her. Naomi is the engineer of one client that Alex's company handles so she really needs to interact with her. Usually not on a daily basis but lately Alex says Naomi seems to stick longer than she normally does but assures her that's only because the project is near completion. Alex knows better than to cheat on her. They once had a conversation in the past that once one of them cheats then that's it for them. After all, cheating is a choice, in which Alex agrees. But there's something with this Naomi that doesn't settle on her. Alex is of course oblivious to this. She says that Naomi is straight but to Piper there's nobody playing straight when it involves a gorgeous lesbian with secretary glasses. Her girlfriend always attracts attention to either sexes and Piper rolls her eyes every time there's a lame individual trying to get Alex's attention when they're together and ignorant to the fact that she's with her. Whichever way, Alex always seem to settle her worries each time for she shows no interest to anybody other than Piper. But this time is different, Alex is far away and it worries her more then ever. She trusts Alex but the people around her, she doesn't. She heard another buzz in her phone then realizes she didn't replied on the last text Alex had sent.
'Pipes, I swear we'll just hangout as a group or I can just stay home if you want me to.' Piper seems touch by Alex's concern over her doubts. She knows Alex will if she says so but she really felt selfish and stupid. Alex is alone and away, it won't hurt so much to let her be of friend's company.
'No, it's fine. Just please…call me, okay?' she texted back.
'Okay woman. I adore you.'
'Adore you back.'
She smiles as she shoots the last text and exhales. She didn't notice Polly was already seated next to her. Skeptically looking at her.
"How long have you've been there?" Piper asks her.
"Long enough…how's Alex?" Polly asks.
"She's busier than ever." She answers looking at the documents in front of her, avoiding Polly's eyes.
"Hey, what's up?" Polly knows of course. She forgets how one look and Polly can tell something's up so there's no point on lying.
"I'm worried. There's this…someone…who's around Alex so much lately, and this distance isn't helping." Voice breaks a little as she says this.
"Your worried and stupid! You guys fight like it's world war but makes up like horny juveniles; you won't last a day without a kiss from each other which is very sugary it makes me want to vomit, and when you're together you can't notice anyone else, you have this staring contest that makes me wonder if you saw a dollar sign on Alex's eyes for you not to look away. If you think Alex will waste everything I think you guys have for a certain rash girl's ass she just met, then she's more than a super cunt. She's a super duper cunt!" Polly said with emphasis that earns a smile on Piper.
"Look Pipes, I know this isn't easy, but if I'm right which I'm usually are, by the way…" which earns an eye roll from Piper "that you guys have this in explainable relation; then no matter how long or how far, you guys will make it. No matter who stands in the way." Polly shares as Piper smiles and lays her head on her shoulder.
"I know…I'm just a jealous narcissist that misses my rationalist of a girlfriend too much." She then says and exhales sadly.
"Hmmm…you always are." Polly puns, that earn a laugh with Piper.
...
Piper waited for Alex's call all night. It irritates her that Alex said she'll call when she gets home but she waited until 3am and no call had reach her. She tried calling but was not answered neither the text that she shoots Alex around 1am. She's worried and exhausted. The fights they had about Naomi are not helping either. She's being paranoid that something will happen that will make her relationship with Alex reach its abrupt end, although she knew that Alex wouldn't ever cheat on her. She fell asleep waiting anxiously and around 5:15am her phone ring booms so loud that it wakes her. She answers without checking who is in the other line but has a hunch who it might be. She's not ready to talk this early.
"Hello?" she speaks with a throaty voice that is apparent that she was awakened.
"Hey kid. Sorry I called so late." Alex slurring on the other end, which makes her even more maddened. Piper is furious. Alex had been indifferent about how she feels about Naomi and this distance is not helping.
"What the hell Alex! Do you know what time it is?" Piper explodes. Her sleep was disturbed, paranoid about someone ruining her relationship and she's exhausted on thinking about the situation they are in. The phone call immediately sparks up another fight between them. Her saying Alex is a selfish individual who only thinks about herself and had no caring bone in her body about how she feels. Alex in her clouded mind of boost come up with a piercing bullet that shoots Piper to the guts when she says that she's a calculating freak that never ever really trusted her and she's growing tired of the same accusations over and over again. Alex understands Piper's worries but she won't let Piper get away about the things she said about her. The battle continues endlessly until Piper hears a female voice in the background "Al, are you coming?"
"Shhh!...I…just go…I'll catch up." Alex answers frantically back. Piper grew silent on the other end for a while that makes Alex concerned. She only heard heavy breathing and sniffing.
"You're still with her." Piper said as a statement not a question to Alex. Alex is about to challenge and spit some more wounding words about Piper being a domineering narcissist when she heard silent sobs. Piper is crying.
"Pipes, I'm still with them…nothi.." Alex explains as she closes her eyes, she doesn't like making Piper cry. She too feels exhausted about all their fights when Piper cuts her out.
"Al, maybe we should…just talk later." Piper says as fatigue seeps in. She just wants to lie in her bed in silence and stop fighting with Alex. Alex felt it too. She was silent on the other end that Piper needs to call her name to see if she's still there.
"Sorry kid. I tried leaving early because I know you're waiting but they won't let me. They took my phone and hid it. I'm really sorry." Alex explains in a voice that tells Piper she really is miserable.
"I know. Sorry too. We'll talk later okay?" Piper says in a soft voice.
"Okay. I miss you…wait for me." Alex replies with longing and exhaustion evident on her voice. They both knew that line holds more meaning than waiting for a call.
"Miss you too…always. Text me once you're home." Piper speaks in a weak little voice that pleads. Alex replies, "okay" before the line went dead. This whole situation is eating them up and they must decide something before they end up hurting each other more.
...
It's Finn's third birthday and the 7th month that Alex has been away. They have settled their previous fight but both of them knew something has changed. Alex doesn't call Piper whenever she's at work preventing any jealous outburst from the latter. She doesn't mention Naomi either unless Piper asks. They talk frequently still but not longer than 30 minutes. Piper never urges Alex to call anymore. Alex will call when she can and Piper shoots her a text whenever she can. No demands, no expectation, lesser talks, lesser fights. Piper hasn't received a call from Alex today. However, they had been sending messages to each other throughout the day. The party had been draining for Polly and Pete so Piper volunteered to be Finn's baby-sitter during the party while his parents cater to their grown up guests. She's changing Finn with his shirt and in mid conversation with Polly and their friends, as she hears Pete talk to someone from the front door.
"Thought you won't make it?" she hears excitement coursing through Pete's voice.
"Traffic's terrible this afternoon." the individual replied back.
"Holy cow!" Polly yells that earned a whine from Finn. Piper looks at Polly alarmed then shifted her head to where Polly is looking. There she saw, Alex. She's wearing a blue plaid shirt, skintight faded jeans that hugs her legs and sneakers. Her hair falls graciously on her shoulders and glasses on her tired emerald orbs. She's striking as always. Piper was stunned; she supposes to come back next month. She was dragged back to reality only by Finn's shouting of "Awwweexxx!" and charges to Alex.
"Happy birthday kiddo!" Alex says as he lifts Finn and handed him a paper bag. Piper watches as the kid opens it and reveals a remote control. Finn gazes behind Alex as his father took inside a mini car that Finn has been requesting for so long. He kisses Alex on the cheek and wiggles so Alex can put him down. He run excitedly towards the car and tosses the adult controller to his father that earns a laugh from Piper. He presses the gas as he yells, "Love you and Pippy, so much!" Alex laughs and Piper looks at her. She yearns to hear that deep laughter for so long now.
"Hey kid!" Alex approaches Piper slowly.
"Hey." Piper answers back as she felt Alex closes the gap between them. She hugs Piper and burrows her face in her hair as she hides her face to Alex's neck. They stayed that way for a while until Polly jokes about their cheesy theatrical scene.
They reached home around 9pm. Piper helped a worn-out, whiny and plastered Alex through their bedroom. Their friends too, making it hard to leave the party earlier missed her girlfriend, but they complied when Piper insisted to let Alex rest. After they both washed and brushes their teeth, she saw Alex seated on the bed leaning on the headboard staring absently through the bedroom window.
"Hey." Piper says softly not to startle the brunette and seats beside her. Alex looks at her not talking just waiting.
"I thought you won't be home for another month?" she inquired curiously.
"I decided to come home early. The project is almost finished anyway." another silence hits them for a while until Alex speaks again. "I can't do this anymore." And she reaches for Piper's hand. Piper freezes as she felt tears starts to well in the base of her eyes. "I knew something has changed but Pipes you must understand I never really had a thing for Naomi. I was there for my job. I could quit if you want to just…let's stop this terrible conflict or whatever we are having." Piper releases a breath she didn't knew holding. She misinterpreted what Alex has meant. She straddles her girlfriend and hugs her tightly burying her face on her neck. She cries quietly. Alex hugs her and strokes her back gently. Alex calls her name as she make soothing sounds.
"You fucking idiot! You scared me. I thought…" Piper says as she lifts her head and catch Alex's eye.
"You're more a fucking idiot if you think we'll break up with this stupid issues of your green eyed monster self." Alex teases as she wipes her tears and she earned a slap on the arm from Piper.
"I'm sorry. I can't help it. You're far and she's there…I cou…"Alex puts her hand on Piper's mouth to stop her rumbling.
"Listen to me, and listen to me very carefully. I'm gonna say it once and I'm not gonna say it again. I wanted only you, not Naomi, not anybody else. If you really are having doubts about it then we're not doing what I think we're doing." She looks at Piper seriously as she delivers the message.
"Just me?" she ask unconvinced. Her puffy eyes shown as she bites her bottom lip. She feels more love for this woman more than she ever felt before.
"Just you. You make up the half of my whole." Alex tightens her grip on Piper's waist and rests her forehead to hers. She was overwhelmed of the feelings that she has for this woman in front of her. They kiss passionately. Piper rumbles, "I'm glad you're here" in between kisses as they convey how much they miss each other. Alex shows her that she only longs for Piper as she pays attention to her lover's body throughout the night. They made love until both of them was spent and falls asleep cuddling each other.
...
The project was completed a month after Alex comes back. Piper had place a face on the object of her jealousy for the past months, when she accompanied Alex to the company party. She was right after all. Naomi is an attractive brunette. She's the same height as Piper, lean athletic body with those piercing grey eyes. She was also right that Naomi is as straight as a circle or batting for both teams when she eyes Alex through the night. But Alex was always with her, looking for her, touching her. She even saw the piercing stare of Naomi whenever Alex affectionately touches her to inquire if she's all right throughout the night. Alex finally believes her on her jealous outburst before, as she too have seen it and felt Naomi's advances as they continue to work until the next two months. However, she is much secured now that Alex will never pay much attention to her advances. She knows Alex's devotions are to her.
One Wednesday night they hit the sack earlier than they used to for both were exhausted on their day to work. A phone's loud ringing wakes Piper up and interrupted the room's deafening silence. She looks at her bedside table for her phone and sees it's as silent as dead. She then lifts her head over Alex's and sees it's her phone that's blaring. She calls for her but Alex replies was all whining. She then reaches the phone and looks at the ID. It's Naomi. The alarms are humming to her head but she dismisses it.
"Babe, you might want to answer this…might be work." Piper says disdainfully as she rubs Alex's stomach to wake her and handed her phone. She knows at this ungodly hour, this is not work. Alex curses and answers the call.
"Naomi…" she whines as she says her name. She hears Naomi on the other line speaking. "I didn't bring home any files." Alex grumbles in irritation.
"Oh, can you look please. I really need that file and I must have it now." Piper furrows her brows as she heard what Naomi says, "a file at 3 in the morning? Really?!" she thinks to herself. She begins to think that this is somewhat a game to lure Alex in. She remains silent as she listens to the conversation.
"Okay I'll check tomorrow." Alex says drowsily as she wants to end the call and doze again. She hears Naomi's insisting, "She needs the file so Alex must meet her" again. "Naomi, tomorrow is only hours away. Meanwhile let me sleep in peace with my girlfriend, and you could use some too." Alex then interrupts her and ends the call even before Naomi answers. Piper was startled as she heard Alex raise the tone of her voice a little. She never did that especially on her colleagues. Piper bit her lip as a grin edges through it. She feels overwhelmingly happy and winning so to speak. Alex changes the phone in silent and puts it back to her bedside table. She faces Piper, annoyance evident on her expression, and envelops her in a tight hug and mumbles, "looking for a file" as she buries her face on Piper's neck. Piper couldn't help her smile and hugs her too, run her hands on Alex back and soothes her to sleep as she place a kiss on Alex's temple. Alex is hers as she is to Alex.
...
On the next day Alex and her decided to meet and grab lunch together. They chose a diner near Alex's workplace. She reached the place 10 minutes early and decided to grab a table while she waits on Alex. Upon entering she glance around to look for a nice place to seat.
"Piper right?" she heard her name being called and glance towards the sound. There she saw Naomi. Alex herself on a previous party by the company introduced them once to each other.
"Yes. Hi! Naomi." She answers her as she saw Alex's other colleagues searching for a table. They wave at her and smile. She smiled back. Piper refuses to let this accidental meeting with the object of her grudge to ruin a perfect lunch with Alex.
"We invited Alex but she declined saying she had plans." Naomi speaks as she glances to their colleagues.
"Well yeah. We made plans for lunch." Piper explains trying hard not to show obvious resentment on her voice and instead struck a polite conversation. After all this is a public place, she doesn't want to start a fight or some sort.
"Nice. You got a good thing, take care of it. Some people would do anything to have it." She said in return. Piper was shocked to hear it. She scrutinizes Naomi's face to see any kind of bitterness but instead she saw honesty in her eyes as she speaks.
"I got it covered. Thanks!" Piper smiles as she speaks. Naomi smirked back and walks off to her colleagues. She saw Alex walk through the front door. She reached Piper and greets her with a peck on the lips.
"Was that…?" Alex eyebrows furrow as she inquires and looks to where Naomi walks. She saw their colleague's wave at her and she waves back.
"Yes she is. Now…let's eat…I'm famished." Piper answers her as she took her face in and place kisses on her lips in between words. Alex wraps her arms on her waist. Piper asks her if they invited her out, looking deeply into Alex's eyes.
"They did but I'd rather be here next to you." Alex teases her as she smirked on a sexy way that makes Piper wants to devour her right then and there.
"You're a fucking sap!" She says and giggles. Alex laughs too.
"So where's our table?" Alex asks her and glances through the diner as people started coming in for lunch.
"I…uh we don't have yet." She replies sheepishly. Alex laughs again the kind of makes Piper think she really is happy. She teases Piper about her unable to jumble two tasks at a time but the blonde rationalizes that she was distracted and not to scrutinize her multitasking skills. They continue to banter back and forth for a while, as Alex hold her hand as they walk and resume looking for a table. She is more secure now that the brunette values what they have. She peeks at Naomi and sees a look of envy from her. Piper pays her no mind. They paid no attention to anybody that said they wouldn't make it. In their heart of hearts they know they will. This is real. She's happy right here, right now. Here with Alex.