This was written initially as Tarohne from DA2, but thanks to Sakura Lisel's great idea, here is some creepy Uldred being a voodoo master from the Deep South. Or, a blood mage from Kinloch Hold. Whichever floats your boat.

Thank you to the same reviewer for pointing out all the mistakes, too!

Friends On The Other Side (Princess and the Frog) – Uldred

The two Templars sprinted along the passage. Mages had been running, screaming, from the top floor, shrieking about abominations and blood magic. The older of the two kept muttering about how this was always going to happen but the younger was doubtful. The Templars kept a close eye on the mages, didn't they? The Libertarians had had no chance to learn anything of the sort.

Another staircase. Pulling his comrade upward, he scoured the darkness – darkness? – for signs of life. A thin, familiar voice echoed from within.

"So kind of you to join us, gentlemen."

The younger Templar cleared his throat. "Uldred. Step forward where we can see you."

"The mage is mad," muttered Odo. "Tread carefully."

A light suddenly flashed in the corner, and a pale, bald man in stained robes appeared. He looked angry. "Don't you disrespect me, little man!" he spat, stepping forward. "Don't you derogate or deride! You're in my world now, not your world – and I've got friends on the other side!"

An echo seemed to reverberate through the dark cavern. In the corner of his eye, Willem thought he saw shadows flickering on the walls. "He's got friends on the other side..."

Uldred laughed at the sudden nervous looks on their faces. "That's an echo, gentlemen," he explained, nonchalantly. "Just a little something we have here in the Tower, a little parlour trick. Don't worry..." And two mages pushed them to a small, chalk circle in the centre of the room, grinning maliciously.

"Sit down in my circle," he ordered. "Put your minds at ease. If you relax it will enable me to do anything I please." He flicked his fingers, and the circle surrounding them burst into flame. "I can read your future. I can change it 'round some, too. I'll look deep into your heart and soul…" He leaned into the elder Templar's face, chuckling, "You do have a soul, don't you, Odo?" Then sitting back. "Make your wildest dreams come true!"

The Templars looked terrified as Uldred flicked electricity around the edges of the circle. "I got voodoo, I got hoodoo, I got things I ain't even tried!" he bragged, before lowering his voice. "And I got friends on the other side."

The echo came again. "He's got friends on the other side!" they whispered, and Willem felt a cold finger run down his spine.

Uldred snapped his fingers, and a laughing mage tipped a pile of cards into Uldred's hands. This was an insult to the younger Templar; it was a rumour among the recruits that blood mages could tell the future from cards. The mages themselves scoffed at this. Uldred spread them out across the table, murmuring, "The cards, the cards, the cards will tell – the past, the present, and the future as well!" he giggled, and looked up, staring at Willem. "The cards, the cards, just take three," he beguiled him, his eyes boring into the templar's. "Take a little trip into your future with me…!"

Willem extended a shaking hand and pulled three random cards from the spread. Uldred snatched them from him, examining them closely – little did the Templars know how the cards concealed a smile. "Now you, young man, are from the city," said Uldred. "You come from two long lines of poverty. The coin's plenty – but the dust's too few…You can't be hooked on lyrium and be a knight too!" Willem blushed. He wasn't the only new recruit to have developed a fondness for the stuff. Uldred leered in mock sympathy, and nudged him. "Templar life pretty tough, huh kid?" he asked, smiling wryly. "Now you gotta kill mages, but mages supply the dust. You just want the lyrium, who cares about freedom? But lyrium... takes magic!" He showed him the next card, depicting a bag of money. "It's magic, it's magic, it's magic you need – and when I look into your future, it's magic that I see!"

Willem trembled, looking at Odo desperately. The older man raised his eyebrows cynically, and picked his own cards. Uldred sniffed. "On you, little man, I don't want to waste much time – you been pushed around all your life," he dismissed. "You been pushed around by your mother and your sister and your brother; and if you were married..." He smirked. "You'd be pushed around by your wife." He then showed him the next card, showing a man bearing a sword and a halo, and giggled, "But in your future, the you I see is exactly the man you always wanted to be!"

Odo nodded, his eyes narrowed. What did this madman want…? Uldred extended his hands, not bothering to conceal the faint lines of blood smeared on her palms. "Shake my hand," he directed, grinning. "Come on boys… Won't you shake a poor sinner's hand?

Willem felt his hand thrust forward against his will, and rough hands forced Odo to lean forward and grasp a slippery palm. "Yes..." cackled Uldred, feeling the thrum of blood magic start to pulse through him. "Are you ready?"

"Are you ready?" repeated the eerie echo. Odo and Willem exchanged terrified glances, realising what was happening. It was too late.

"Are you ready? Transformation central!" screeched Uldred, as the men began to shake uncontrollably. The shadows on the walls burst into flame and paraded around the room, no longer shadows, but full, fiery, angry beings.

"Transformation central!"

"Reformation central!" The Templars were beginning to stretch and distort – Willem's handsome face seemed to be melting, and Odo's limbs were extending at strange angles.

"Reformation central!" chanted the demons, gleefully.

"Transmogrification central!" yelled Uldred as the Templars collapsed at his feet. "Can you feel it? You're changing, you're changing, you're changing, all right! I hope you're satisfied," he sneered, as the abominations rose in front of him, their eyes blank. "But if you aren't – don't blame me! You can blame my friends on the other side!"

The abominations that had once been Willem and Odo of the Templar Order stumbled clumsily over the demons that reached for them with long, fiery fingers. "You got what you wanted!" they laughed. "But you lost what you had!"

A sudden hush descended on the room. Uldred chuckled menacingly. Only the rest of the order to go, and they would control the tower.

-0-0-0-0-

Up Next: Carver reflects on what he really wants from his life.