A/N: Well, I don't get near as many reviews as I used to on this fic, probably because I didn't update it for a while so I guess it's my fault…but I'm still gonna see it through! I'll probably update once a week until the end. If you wanna review, that'd make my day! Other than that, here's the next chapter!
The DreamStakes!
Heroes: Birdo, Stanley, Zess T., Toadsworth, Boo, Noki
Villains: Princess Shroob, Wendy, Don Pianta, Bowser, Pauline, Kammy Koopa
"Welcome back to the DreamStakes!" Brighton announced with a sunny smile. "The show where everyone's either crazy, in love, or just plain stupid!"
"And one of you is a homicidal maniac!" Twila spat, her eyes viciously scanning the remaining twelve competitors. Following the success of Don Pianta and Wendy in the prize challenge, the players finally had time to truly enjoy Noki Bay. However, now they were grouped together at the front of the bay to partake in their first elimination challenge under the newly formed teams. Anxiety fluttered in many of their hearts.
"So I bet all of you are ready to play!" Brighton cried. "Today's game is super simple. Before you is are several floating pads of coral. They exist naturally in the bay and bob up and down through the lagoon. To win this challenge for your team…just don't fall in the water. The catch is, anyone can come and shove you off. There's some distance in between the pads, but it's to be able to jump across from one pad to the next. Whichever team can get all the members of the other team in the water first wins!"
"What!? I can barley swim!" Stanley cried. "Why!?"
"Because we hate you!" Twila answered. "I'm going to find whoever hit me in the head! When I find out who that is…I'LL RIP THEM TO SHREDS!"
Zess T. whistled nervously.
"So go! Get on the pads!" Brighton said, shooing the players towards the bay with his gloved hands. They all moved into position. On top of her pad, Princess Shroob smirked. She had her ray gun handy, and she knew she could quickly blast the poor heroes away with her weapon.
Princess Shroob: There's no way the villains can lose! With my ray gun and the combined strength of Don Pianta and Bowser, our team is indestructible!
"START!" Brighton announced.
Grinning evilly, Princess Shroob withdrew her ray gun and prepared to fire.
"Zess!" Noki wailed. "Get rid of that ray gun! Otherwise she'll fry us all!"
"On it!" the old chef shouted. She fished her frying pan out of her apron and drew her arm back. Taking aim, the cook tossed her skillet through the air and knocked Princess Shroob's ray gun right out of her hand and into the water.
"You treacherous peasant!" Princess Shroob shouted. "I'm going to enslave you and your descendants for centuries!" Growling with pure rage, Princess Shroob leapt from pad to pad, making her way towards Zess T.
"Ohoho~ I better run!" Zess T. laughed, patting her doughy midsection and jumping to the next pad.
"I dare say, be careful!" Toadsworth advised. He looked around, noticing Bowser was headed right for him.
"You should follow your own advice," the Koopa King said with a snarl. Withdrawing his claws, he made to snatch Toadsworth up and toss him in the bay. However, the aging minister took his cane and smacked Bowser on the forehead with it. "You fool!" Bowser bellowed. "No one hits the Koopa King!"
"Toodletoes!" Zess T. shouted in worry from her pad. She had put a safe distance in between herself and Princess Shroob.
"We should help them," Boo told Noki, who nodded in agreement. The two of them made to leave their pad and help out Toadsworth, but Wendy and Pauline stepped into their path.
"I'm sorry," Wendy said, blowing her nails. "But that's as far as you go. We're not going to let you get past us."
"Oh give me a break," Boo said with a roll of his eyes. "What is Wendy O. Ugly and the sad rejected hooker going to do to us?" Boo asked with a sarcastic snark. Paling, Wendy's face soon diffused with anger.
"H-how dare you! With a mouth like that, it's a wonder you're a hero! I'm going to make you pay for that!" Wendy vowed. Shocked, Pauline also made an effort to stop the lovebirds. She lunged for Noki, but Boo stepped in front of the marine biologist and grabbed Pauline's shoulders.
"Let me go!" the woman in scarlet shrieked.
"Sorry," Boo told her, "but it's time for you to take a trip!" He shoved her forcefully into the water. "See you next fall!"
"You brat!" Wendy yelled. "I'll finish you in vengeance for Pauline!"
"As if," Boo snorted. He floated across the pad towards Wendy, tackling her head-on. However, he put too much force into his blow and both of them went toppling into the water, creating a large splash.
"Boo!" Noki cried.
"Don't worry about me!" Boo shouted at her, spewing water from his mouth as he and Wendy surfaced. "Help Toadsworth and Zess T.!" Nodding, Noki took off, hopping from pad to pad to help the old Toads.
Meanwhile, Birdo and Stanley were engaged in combat with Don Pianta and Kammy.
"Stop using your magic, hag!" Stanley shouted, dodging a barrage of magic bolts from the magikoopa.
"Can it, bud!" Kammy spat. "If we've been branded as villains, we'll play dirty!"
"Ehehe," laughed the Don. "One ground pound should do da trick." He jumped into the air, clearing the pad he and Kammy were standing on and reaching the pad Birdo stood on. Flipping in the air, the mob boss brought his rear down against the pad. A thunderous quake was produced, flipping Birdo off the pad and into the water. The rock of his assault sent waves surging through the lagoon.
"Whoa!" Princess Shroob cried, trying to maintain her balance. In front of her, Zess T. found a steady hold for her footing and grinned. She lunged at Princess Shroob while the space princess was trying to adjust her own footing. Crying out, she fell back against the pad with Zess T. on top of her.
"Get off me, plebe!"
"I've had about enough of you!" Zess T. shouted. She got up and kicked Princess Shroob in the side.
"Ow! Damn you, old peasant! You'll meet me wrath now!" Princess Shroob vowed. She took out her wine goblet and smacked Zess T. in the face with it, sending the chef tumbling into the bay.
"Zess!" Toadsworth cried.
"We have the advantage!" Princess Shroob called out to her remaining team members. "Finish them!"
"Not on my watch!" Stanley shouted. He kicked off his pad and flutter jumped into the air, leaving the Don and Kammy behind. With his tongue, he reached back and smacked them both in the face. It had only annoyed the Don, but it was enough to send frail old Kammy spiraling into the blue of the bay.
Princess Shroob clenched her teeth. Stanley's trick had put him far from all but Bowser.
"Bowser! Leave Toadsworth and focus on the black peasant! I'll handle the old magistrate! Don, get Noki!"
"On it!" Bowser and Don said simultaneously. Sighing, Toadsworth felt relieved for just a moment. He had been keeping Bowser at bay with his cane, but now he realized his moment of rest was over as Princess Shroob headed straight for him. Crying out, he panicked and tossed his cane at her. She leaned to the left, dodging the stick. It sailed past her, smacking Don Pianta in the face and sending him teetering to the edge.
"What da goombas!?" Don Pianta cried, swaying back and forth. "Where did dat come from!?"
"Don't lose your balance!" Princess Shroob shouted at him.
Don Pianta struggled to maintain his footing. Meanwhile, Stanley flutter jumped over Bowser onto the opposite pad. "Quit running!" Bowser snarled, swiping at Stanley but missing. Smirking, the dark dinosaur kicked Bowser in the stomach with his purple boots. Since the Don was busy finding a foothold, Noki directed her attention at Bowser. She hopped from pad to pad, and Stanley assaulted the Koopa King with a flurry of quick footwork, Noki finished him off by yanking his tail and pulling him back into the water.
"Not fair!" Bowser shouted, coming up from the water. "For heroes, you sure play some dirty tricks!"
Not worrying about that, Noki and Boo turned their attention towards Princess Shroob. She had backed Toadsworth into a corner.
"No Zess, no frying pan, no cane to save you now, old man!" Princess Shroob shouted victoriously. With minimal effort, she punted the old Toad into the bay.
"Goodness me!" Toadsworth cried as he sailed through the air and splashed into the water.
Stanley cursed under his breath. They were two against two now. If the heroes lost this…he'd be forced to vote out a friend. Don Pianta had regained his footing, and now the large mobster was heading for them.
"Scatter!" Stanley told Noki, jumping into the air and rapidly kicking his legs. Noki nodded and skipped from pad to pad.
"Get ova here!" Don Pianta shouted in irritation. Growling, Princess Shroob switched pads and charged at the Yoshi and the Noki. Right before she neared, Stanley stuck out his tongue and swallowed her whole, shooting her out as an egg and sending her into the bay. The egg dissolved upon touching the water, and Princess Shroob stuck out her tongue and vigorously washed it.
"Oh my God!" she screamed once she was done. "That peasant ate me! W-what the Grambi was that!? How filthy! I smell of peasant! I-I-I," she fainted in the water, prompting Brighton to fish her out with a net.
"So it's two against one, huh?" Don Pianta asked. Her lunged forward, grabbing Noki and tossing her into the water with zero effort. Shocked, Stanley realized how strong the Don truly was. "You wanna go toe ta toe with me, punk?"
Stanley grinned. Charging forward, his sudden move caught Don Pianta by surprise and he shoved the orange pianta into the bay. Realizing he had won, Stanley let out a whoop and smiled wide.
"The Heroes have won the challenge!" Brighton announced.
"All of you are losers at heart!" Twila reminded them.
"We won!" Boo cheered from the water. "We did it!"
"Jolly good!" Toadsworth shouted. Zess T. paddled over to him and planted a kiss against his cheek, causing him to melt like butter. Birdo smiled at Stanley from the water, blowing him a celebratory kiss. The three couples on the heroes team were safe for today.
"Blast!" Princess Shroob spat, climbing out of her net once she came to. "We weren't supposed to lose!"
"It doesn't matter, remember?" Wendy reminded her. "Our alliance will prove strong enough…"
The three of them, Don Pianta included as he waddled over, eyed the Koopa King and his aide. He and Kammy had climbed back onto the shore, and neither of them looked overly worried that they had lost. Laughing inwardly, the alliance of villains knew they'd control this vote.
"You did great, Stanley!" Birdo said, hugging the triumphant dino back on shore. "I had no idea you were so strong!" She pet his arm, giggling as she felt his muscles. Smiling, Stanley finally felt confident for once in this game.
"I know!" Noki said. "You two should go see the waterfall caves! There's little nooks all up and down the Cliffside, and there's some cool spots."
"Do you want to go?" Birdo asked Stanley.
"I'd love to!" he told her. Date settled, the two of them went back to the cottages to pack a picnic dinner. "Would you guys like to join us?" Birdo asked the other four members of the heroes team.
"That's fine, dear," Zess told her, answering for herself and Toadsworth. "I'm going to teach Toodletoes how to cook Zess Dynamite! Ohoho!" She gave Toadsworth a loving look which he equally returned.
"What about you two?" Birdo asked Boo and Noki.
"We'll pass," Boo said. "Noki wants me to meet some of her family members here."
"So it's just you and me then," Birdo told Stanley. Smiling, the victorious dino would be glad to have some alone time with Birdo. He had something he wanted to tell her. This challenge had given him enough courage to tell her how he truly felt about her.
"Mom? Dad?" Noki asked, knocking on the door of a blue spiraled shell cottage. After a few moments, the door swung open and an older female noki with brown stripes opened the door.
"Noki! What a surprise! I thought you had gone off to play on that gameshow! Your father and I have watched every episode!" Her mother told her.
"O-oh," Noki said, turning red. "W-well then…wait, my name's not Noki mom! You know my name!"
Her mother ignored her, focusing on Boo instead. "I know exactly who this is," her mother said, eyeing Boo like any mother would eye her daughter's suitor. "You must be Boo."
"Y-yes…" Boo said awkwardly, scratching the back of his head. "I'm Boo!"
"Pleasure to meet you, I'm Noki's mother," she said, introducing herself.
"Mom!" Noki huffed. "That's not my name!"
"Come in, come in," Noki's mother told the two of them. "We want to know everything! You seem like such a nice fellow, Boo! Noki's father and I are so happy you've chosen to be with her!"
Noki just sighed, giving up on fighting her mother.
"Yes! We're so excited to plan the wedding!" Noki's mother exclaimed.
"THE WEDDING!?" Boo and Noki shouted, their jaws dropping.
"Yes, yes! Come along now! Boo has to meet your father!" Noki's mother insisted. She dragged both of them into the cottage, bringing them to the living room where a small Noki with blue stripes and a gray mustache sat.
"Ohoho! If it isn't my darling daughter…and the fellow who's stolen her heart!" Noki's father exclaimed. "Sit, sit! We must show you embarrassing photos of Noki and tell you about all the times she did something cute as a child!"
"MY NAME ISN'T NOKI!" Noki roared. "IT'S..."
"Noki, please," Noki's mother shushed her. "Shouting is not very nice. Use your inside voice." She laughed loudly. "You can such a rebellious child sometimes." Rolling her eyes, Noki sighed and just sat in silence while Boo nervously sat with her father and flipped through old pictures of Noki as a child.
"And voila!" Zess T. said with a smile, opening the oven. Her expression quickly turned sour. "A mistake! Toodletoes! What did you do wrong!?"
"Ah," remarked Toadsworth quietly, "I see here. I put in a keel mango instead of a coconut."
"You wasted my only keel mango!" Zess T. cried, bawling into her apron. "We must go get another at once!"
"W-what!? Good heavens, why!?" Toadsworth demanded to know.
"Keel mangos are so sweet! So delectable! A chef must always have one on hand! They are essential! We must go!" she proclaimed, grabbing a nearby bag and shoving Toadsworth out of the door. Together, they began the trek to find a keel mango somewhere in this bay.
As the members of the Heroes team embarked upon their various adventures throughout the bay, the villains congregated by the seaside for the elimination ceremony. The afternoon had melted into early evening, and the sun was beginning to set over the bay. A confident smirk on her face, Princess Shroob knew her alliance would prevail.
"Alright," Brighton said. "You all know how this works. You all vote once, and the person with the most votes goes home! Let's get started! Bowser, you're up!"
Bowser smiled, not having a care in the world. He made his walk to the back. One by one, they all voted, and Twila brought the ballot box back.
"I've got the votes…and I'm so happy to say one of you will soon leave! That means one less suspect in my hunt for my assailant!" Twila shouted with glee. "Now all of you shut up as a I read the votes!"
Everyone kept a still tongue, not eager to anger the now insane Twila.
"FIRST VOTE…PAULINE."
Pauline looked shocked. "Why did I get a vote!?"
"You've become useless since Mario got booted!" Bowser snapped. "A useless teammate shouldn't be kept around!"
Pauline just scowled at him. She knew how the ceremony should play out.
"SECOND VOTE…PAULINE."
Pauline made a click of her tongue in annoyance.
"THIRD VOTE…KAMMY."
"Bah!" Kammy pouted. "Who is responsible for this!?"
"FOURTH VOTE…KAMMY."
Now Pauline was the one smirking as Kammy began to feel the pressure. Bowser scanned the members of his team, folding his arms and blowing steam from his nostrils.
"FIFTH VOTE…KAMMY."
"No!" the magikoopa shouted. "I can't go home yet! I'm supposed to win!"
"SIXTH VOTE…," Twila said, showing off the parchment. "KAMMY!"
"WHAT!?" Bowser roared, eyes bugging out. "Wendy! How could you?"
"You never pay attention to me!" Wendy shouted back, sticking out her tongue. "You're a terrible father who bullies his own daughter! First I've done away with Kammy, and you're next!"
Bowser and Kammy could barely keep their jaws from touching the ground as Wendy mopped the floor with them. "I'm sorry, your rudeness…" Kammy said sadly.
"GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE!" Twila shouted, throwing Kammy's bag at the magikoopa and shooing her away. With a grunt, Kammy took her bag, hopped on her broomstick, and floated away.
"Beware Princess Shroob!" she shouted as she zoomed away. "I have a feeling she was behind this, your terribleness!" Her final warning to Bowser caused the Koopa King to turn on Princess Shroob.
"You little witch!" he spat. "You brainwashed my daughter and got rid of Kammy! Why!? Pauline is SO useless!"
"To you," Princess Shroob cackled. "To me? She's quite valuable."
"I can't wait to vote your ass out!" Bowser grumbled.
"Well wait no more!" Brighton said with a grin. "Because you're going to vote another person out right now!"
"WHAT!?" Bowser roared in dismay.
Princess Shroob laughed victoriously. "Wonderful!"
Don Pianta rubbed his hands together and Wendy smiled at her father. "Sorry Daddy," she said in a fake voice.
"Let's get to it!" Brighton said.
"MOVE!" Twila yelled. "GET MOVING! TIME TO VOTE!"
Spurned by Twila's wrath, the five remaining villains went one by one to vote out a second member of their team. But, as they went to go vote, something odd happened. Wendy winked at her father, soliciting a grin from the Koopa King. Twila returned with the voting box after Wendy cast her vote, planting it on top of her stand.
"Same drill as before," Twila said dully. "One of you chumps is about to follow Kammy out! I'll read the votes."
"FIRST VOTE…BOWSER."
Bowser looked ready to accept his fate, but a twinkle in his eye said otherwise. Don Pianta chuckled from the sidelines, but then his laughter quickly faded.
"SECOND VOTE…DON PIANTA."
"Ay, Bowsa," he said venomously. "I didn't come up wit da plan ta boot ya hag! Don't blame it on me!"
"Oh," Bowser chuckled. "I know you didn't plan to get rid of Kammy…" he paused for dramatic effect. "I DID!"
"WHAT!?" Don Pianta and Princess Shroob cried at the same time.
"Wendy!" Princess Shroob snapped. "What's the meaning of this?"
"You think I'd work with alien scum like you?" Wendy scoffed. "My Dad's the KING OF EVIL! Of course we'd think up an elaborate scheme like this!"
"I can't stand Kammy!" Bowser prattled on. "She always reminds me about my blood pressure. WELL GUESS WHAT!? Now she's gone, and I can do WHATEVER I WANT! Woohoo! And to start Bowser's reign of terror, I'm gonna execute Don Pianta!"
"But with what votes?" Princess Shroob challenged as the Don began to sweat. "You've only two, and you voted out a loyal minion? You're so stupid!"
"Au contraire," Wendy giggled. "We have enough votes!"
All eyes turned to Pauline.
She yawned, looking into a compact mirror. "Oh Mario…" she murmured, "how I miss you so. Good thing Lord Bowser promised me as soon as this game is over, he's not just going to do another routine kidnapping of the princess…but he'll kidnap you too! Then we can be together forever!"
"YOU TRAITOROUS PEASANT!" Princess Shroob shouted. "I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU'VE DONE THIS TO ME!"
"Watch and weep," Bowser cackled.
"ARE YOU ALL DONE!?" Twila shouted. "Sheesh, you stupid villains always go on and on about your evil plans. Just shut up already and let me read the votes!"
"THIRD VOTE…DON PIANTA."
"You little scumbag," the Don hissed at Wendy. She just shrugged and smiled.
'FOURTH VOTE…BOWSER."
Bowser smirked, knowing that was the last vote for himself.
"FIFTH VOTE…," Twila said, turning over the final piece of paper. "DON PIANTA."
"I can't believe it," the Don remarked. Princess Shroob was fuming. Brighton tossed the Don his bag and he bid his teammates adieu. Walking down the edge of the bay, he boarded a boat and took off back to Rogueport.
"Pauline! Why have you betrayed me so!" Princess Shroob wept.
"Your terrorism ends now, and ours begins!" Wendy chirped with delight. "You better hope we never lose again, Princess Shroob, or else its curtains for you!" Wendy high-fived her father, who was laughing so hard tears were forming at the corners of his eyes. But Princess Shroob wasn't mad at them. In fact, she commended their strategy. Her eyes rested on Pauline, burning into the back of her head.
"All the peasants have betrayed me," she whispered under breath. "They've staged a coup! First Birdo, then Flurrie-slave, and now Pauline…but I won't let them get the best of me. No, I've still got a card to play."
In a cave on the Cliffside, Stanley and Birdo were laying out a flannel blanket to have their picnic dinner on. Gems on the walls of the cave sparkled with radiance. Smiling, Birdo couldn't keep her eyes off of Stanley.
"You did AMAZING today," she told him, unable to stop smiling.
"The way you keep reminding me, you'd think I saved a whole village!" Stanley exclaimed with a grin.
"Well, you did save all of us," Birdo pointed out. "I don't know what I would have done if we'd been forced to vote for one of the others. I like all of them so much."
Stanley blushed a little. "Uhm…Birdo, can I tell you something?"
"Sure!" she beamed. "You can tell me anything!"
"Well…since I joined this game, you've been so nice to me."
"Everyone has!" she told him.
"Yeah…but you've been special. You're more than a friend to me Birdo, and I think I…"
"BIRDO!" came a familiar voice, causing the pink dinosaur to spin around. Standing at the foot of the cave, finally healed and having come out of nowhere…was Yoshi!
"YOSHI!?" Birdo bellowed. "What are you doing here!?
"Yeah!" Stanley chimed in. "Who said you could come here and barge in on our date?"
"Birdo!" Yoshi reaffirmed his words. "You must believe me when I say this…THAT'S NOT MY COUSIN!" He pointed a finger right at Stanley.
"Don't be ridiculous!" Stanley yelled. "What are you going on about, cuz? We've been buds since we were little! Of course we're cousins!"
"W-what…?" Birdo wondered aloud what was going on.
"Birdo, you must trust me!" Yoshi shouted. "This isn't my cousin at all! He's my rival! His name is Boshi and he sabotaged my chances at this game! The windmill accident was set up on purpose!"
"Boshi!?" Stanley cried. "Who's that?"
"He's my rival," Yoshi growled. "You would know, Boshi!"
"Boshi has blue skin!" Birdo argued. "Yoshi, please stop this!"
"I'll show you!" Yoshi growled. He marched over to Stanley and grabbed his tail. Lifting it up, he pointed to its underside, causing Birdo to drop her jaw in shock.
The underside of Stanely's tail was blue.
"S-Stanley?" Birdo asked warily.
"Why do you think he wears those shades! Why do you think he's obsessed with you, Birdo! Why do you think someone so humble as 'Stanley' would enter a competition for money!?" Yoshi argued, his voice rising. Birdo's eyes switched back and forth between Yoshi and Stanley, but her answer was soon given to her.
Slowly clapping, Stanley began to laugh. Snapping his fingers, he continued to laugh as a coat of rainbow dust fell from his shoulders. The rainbow veil traveled down his body, and once it disappeared, he was totally blue.
"Looks like Kamek's magic was only temporary," Stanley spat. "I should've known that magikoopa was a fraud! Everything was perfect! I had Birdo wrapped around my finger and with my large alliance, I was headed straight for the end!"
"S-Stanley?" Birdo asked once more.
"That's not my name!" The blue Yoshi spat. "The name's Boshi! Get it right! But since you both know me secret, looks like I have to finish you both off! I want this money, baby! Boshi's gonna be riiiich! I can't have two clods like you get in the way!"
"This must be a horrible dream!" Birdo wailed. "I'd finally found someone who loved me for who I am!"
"Who you are?" Boshi snickered. "You're nothing but an ugly, vacuum-mouthed horror show! Good God, invest in some plastic surgery, will you?"
"N-no…this can't be happening…" Birdo whispered, collapsing on the ground. Yoshi tugged on her arm, but it was no use.
"Hahaha!" Boshi cackled. "Looks like it's you and me, chump! I'll finish you here! Another unfortunate accident for the magnificent and perfect Yoshi! Man, I hate you! It's time to make sure you never see the spotlight again!"
Yoshi gritted his teeth. Boshi adjusted his sunglasses, took a step back, and then charged.
In the words of Yoshi's fallen friend Ballyhoo…WHOA! Who saw this coming? A surprise second elimination! Bowser and Wendy's convoluted plot since the beginning…and the sudden appearance of Yoshi! Not to mention, Stanley's a fraud! He's been Boshi this whole time! Next time on The DreamStakes, will Yoshi defeat Boshi, or will the villainous dino get away with everything!? How will Princess Shroob cope with being backed into a corner by Bowser and his daughter? Will Pauline ever get out of her post-Mario depression? Will Toadsworth and Zess T. find their Keel Mango? Will Boo escape the cute assault of Noki's parents…and will we ever learn Noki's name!? So many questions, so little answers! Maybe some of those answers will reveal themselves next time on…The DreamStakes!