Notes/ This chapter took me a while to write, because honestly I had a bit of trouble writing it. It's a bit emotionally all over the place again, and while I like writing those and I think you like reading them, it was hard to get it right, and to get the right feel to it that it needed.
I am nearing the end of this story. A few more chapters and it should be done. It's all falling into p[lace. I already have the end in mind. From here on I tend to think it'll be pretty serious chapters and less of the fluffy stuff.
I'm already cooking up a few ideas for a couple of shorter stories, still within the transformers fandom, because I'm liking writing this and I want to write more for the characters. And thanks a ton tot he readers and reviewers who have stuck with this so far. Any typos in here I'm really sorry about. I'm planning to get this up, before I leave for work today.
"I… I dunno what to do, Boss."
Breakdown wasn't stupid. Knockout knew that even when it so often seemed less than obvious to certain others on board. But he was starting to panic. He always did seem to doubt himself when he did that.
"You need to grab my scanner," Knockout waved a shaky hand roughly toward a work table nearly, on which he'd tossed the device sometime earlier. Give him the first step and he'd remember the next one, and the after that.
"Scanner… right..." the big blue bot was trying. He grabbed the thing and hurried back. "Readings stable. Moderate fuel loss…." He dropped the med-scanner to the floor, moved to retrieve it and then obviously decided quite wisely not the bother about it that second. "Badly leaking fuel line under the left chest-plate. I need to… repair the line."
Knockout might have laughed in so many other, less dangerous or pressing situations. He might have poked a little bit of fun at his friend. The shaking doubt in the voice of such a big bot, so great at doing damage, might have made him laugh. It had so many times before. But instead of laughing this time, he only looked at him and nodded that he was right.
"You've done such a job before." Speaking coherently was becoming hard to do.
"Never anyone that was not already an unconscious scrap heap," Breakdown said. He began to rummage through a nearby drawer and the wrong one at that. He could not have possibly been looking for intake tubing, circuitry wiring or compression bandages. And he was also making a mess of the work station. Knockout felt like he would like to laughed again if he could have. Now he knew exactly why his medbay was so often in disarray not long after he'd reorganized it. He'd figured.
"Never anyone I actually care about and need to live."
"Don't let anyone on this ship hear you say that," Knockout said. He gestured weakly toward the top drawer and breakdown took the hint at once, yanking it open to find a welder and sealant. "If anyone actually knew the big mean brute of the bot had feelings..."
Breakdown gave a clearly nervous laugh. "Hand me your right arm for a second, Boss. Okay, deactivating the pain sensory circuits."
"Good job Breakdown. And please stop calling me boss. You always do that when you panic in here."
"Yeah… I guess I do." Breakdown had already begun to remove part of the front panel. Good call he'd made own his own. He'd never have been able to make the repair otherwise and he knew that.
"So I guess that commander of of ours must really be out for a good slugging match today. I never got what exactly that guy's problem is. Head shoved too far up a certain part of his body I tell ya…. What did you do anyway? That is if you feel like sharing a good story that is." Breakdown was rambling a bit, but he was putting to good use the trick of conversation to keep a patient awake and paying attention. So he had been paying attention all those years…
"'Scream and I had a slight disagreement about the handing of an Autobot prisoner," Knockout explained, speaking quietly. He would have made his own conscious patents try talking to him, but he was learning now that it was harder than it looked.
"I think I totaled the paint on your panel,"
"You can repaint for me later. And buff and detail. I trust you with my paint and finish."
"'Kay, Boss…. Err Knockout."
"Do you ever think about running away from here?" Knockout blurted out the question without thinking, but his friend only tipped his big head slightly to one side and looked confused.
"You wanna run away from the 'cons?" Ah, well that took him at last a minute to work out. But to his credit he did keep his voice down to almost a whisper.
"You can never tell anyone… I've even had such thoughts..."
"I would never. But really, don't run off. I mean, what would you do… defect to the Autobot side?"
"Yeah, I guess that is a pretty stupid thought," Knockout gave a nervous laugh as his friend reattached his panel.
Knockout woke up to find himself laying awkwardly on top his recharge station, with a data pad shoved painfully partly underneath the right side of his body, and his right leg flung over the side and nearly touching the floor. He tried to remember what he'd been reading, and could not recall. But he knew he had obviously fallen into recharge reading it. He grabbed the pad and moved it to the little shelf just within reach. But he didn't bother to get up. His sense of time told him it was early in the afternoon, and he knew the last thing he should be doing was napping away, but Knockout was far beyond exhausted from lack of any decent recharge in weeks and at least the last memory that had come to him while resting had not been nightmarish. He found a far more comfortable position and let himself lightly power down again. It was only early afternoon and the place was quiet. He wouldn't rest for too long.
"Knockout," Starscream's voice boomed over the comm system inside the medbay, "Do be so kind as to grace me with your presence on the surface at once. Soundwave will get your a bridge to our co-ordainates."
"Commander, I am in the middle of my work here." Knockout was flat lying and he feared anyone that matter would have known it. But he tried it anyway. He stared around his empty bay, before wondering close to a window to look down at the Earth below. The ship was above the dessert lands of America again. There were no known energon mines left in the region. His spark started to sink and fast. Something big was going down. He could sense it. And he knew he didn't exactly like this.
"Knockout," Starscream practically yelled over the commlink. "I said now, and I don't think you want me to repeat myself again. Now, go get that ground-bridge."
It could not been been only in his own imagination that Starscream had grown far more demanding and entirely obnoxious lately. Oh he had most certainly always been spoiled and ridiculous, and the crew had never exactly been silent about thinking so. But lately the commander had entirely stopped appearing almost proud of it. Instead it only made him angrier than ever.
"You're going to love this, Knockout," the commander said, now calmer and clearly amused with himself. "We are going to have a little fun, and we want you to play the game too."
"Alright, alright, I'm coming. Send the ground-bridge."
Knockout stepped out of the bridge somewhere outside a dessert town. For a moment he could only stare half blankly at the scene in front of him, not quite registering what it was he was seeing. Then it all clicked and he forced his face-plate into a blank expression, as his fuel tank flipped horribly.
Megatran and Soundwave stood on either side of a widely grinning Starscream. Soundwave and Starscream each held in their hands one of the child partner's of the Autobots, well sealed into clear containers. Starscream grated one finger against the glass of of the one he held, and probably for no real reason but to make the horrible noise on purpose. The third child, the human female, sat helpless in her own little glass prison, on the ground between the officers and the still open bridge.
"You were a bit late to the party, Knockout," Starscream said, still not even bothering to hide his pride in the whole set up. "Soundwave and I already picked out our humans. That leaves you with the little female. I hope you don't mind."
Knockout stepped forward in two long paces and snatched up the girl. She was was half conscious inside the container, clearly regaining awareness after it was recently taken from her. At a quick glance the two boys were little better. The small one might just have been worse.
"I must say, I am quite impressed with my second in command for once," Megatron's voice made him look away from the children and up to his leader. "Starscream actually thought up a plan that might actually work. Haul the Autobot's little pets to Cybertron. If I know Prime, he can't not give us back those keys then."
"He'd never let us kill these kids," Starsceam was laughing almost hysterically while he spoke. Clearly he was enjoying having finally gotten something right. He must have loved the acknowledgment.
"You let me and my friends ouuta here, you big 'con bullies." The human in the container he held shouted, banging on the glass. In their own containers, held by his team mates the two boys were quieter. One was still barely awake and the other was quiet clearly thinking hard.
"Let me pull them out of these for a moment," Knockout said. "The small one doesn't look so good, and I'd like make a quick assessment of all three."
"Typical of a medic," Starscream growled. "One might think you actually cared about these kids." Knockout felt Starscream and Megatron both boring holes through him with their gazes. "Please tell me you don't… actually… care..."
"If he's gone compassionate and weak on us, pleeease my lord tell me I can finish him myself," Starscream went on, now begging pathetically.
Megatron only shrugged at that and stepped forward, clearly meaning to lead the group on. "If he blows this one, Starscream, I assure you, he's all yours."
The child inside the container Knockout held had stopped her bold and furious shouting, and slumped against there bottom of the container as it was carried with her inside. He held it higher, trying in vain to get a halfway decent look at her. But all he saw were the tears streaking down her face.
"I'm so sorry little Miko," he heard himself say out loud, in a strange state of half wakefulness. His own voice startled him, and he opened his optics to stare up at that now familiar ceiling of the Autobot's Earth base. He tried to pull himself up to sitting, felt the tears of shame and guilt and rage, on his faceplate. But he was so tired. His processor was banging inside his head, and the ceiling appeared to wave and ripple slightly above him. He only drifted right back into a power down, all the while thinking of getting up instead.
Knockout felt his head bounce off the metal floor, before he knew he had even fallen. He was dragged roughly to his feet within a second and with the room still spinning fast around him. He raised his arms to protect himself, but that did little against the hard punches that followed in rapid secession. The shooting pain jolting through his lower arm, told him that a wrist joint was more than likely busted apart entirely. And that was only from the futile try at blocking hits.
He felt himself fall again, shove hard toward the floor face first, and he readied himself for the impact. But a rough grip snatched him up by the right arm hard and quick before he finished falling. The motion almost yanked his shoulder from its socket. He fought back a cry, as a new pain spread though his arm and the left side of his body. He looked around past the stead stream of leaking energon that poured into his optics, searching for a way out. The door was too far. He knew that he'd only be snatched backward before he could possibly make the dash across to it. And anyway his arm was still being held firmly and far too hard. More punches, and a couple of kicks. He couldn't even think of defending himself.
"Answer the question, Knockout," the demand was little more than a loud and furious growl.
"I'm.. I… I'm sorry.. my…. My lord. I don't know..."
"You worthless waste of space, heap of scrap, medic," Megatron roared with the rage he had a well earned reputation for. "Surely you know the answer to the question. Why did you do it, Knockout?" More punches, and when he fell to the floor, this time allowed to land on his knees, several brutal and rough kicks followed.
"I await your answer, medic," More kicks, and finally energon poured from Knockout's mouth. He felt it dripping.
"I can't give you an answer my lord, because I don't know what I did!" He cried tears of desperation and humiliation. He couldn't make himself stop. "Please, stop this. You… need me… I'm… I'm still useful… to the cause..."
"Yes Knockout. About as useful as rust in the vents." Hard hits, harder kicks and his master's laughter were all that followed.
Knockout knew well, Megatron's reputation for violence against his own crew. He had always been lucky enough to avoid more than a slight hint of it, hiding out most often as he did, working in the medbay. But there had always been a steady number injuries landing in his bay, that would have many any observant bot nervous. It was obvious that physical assault was to blame for too many of them, and very few if any such thing had much at all to do with Autobots, or simple accidents in the training gym. He knew full well that Starscream was far too often on the receiving end of it. His medical files more than supported the constantly spreading rumors. But the second in command would surely have killed anyone that dared to approach him about it. He could be almost as brutal and violent against the crew himself. It so often seemed perfectly clear that the harder Starscream was beaten up on, the harder he would beat up on the crew himself.
But Starscream was long gone, and had been for a while. Presumably in hiding somewhere on the planet Earth, and with a kill on sight order on his head. And Knockout knew with growing dread, that he was quite clearly among the troops that would become new targets for their lord and master's rage now.
Somewhere behind them, a heavy table was knocked over, and the noise of bencding metal was followed at once by some loud and ridiculous insistence that it was somehow Knock's fault the thing had fallen over. If only he hadn't messed up, if only he hadn't ignited the master's anger nothing would have been bumped and fallen. Another crash from an object, this one quite obviously thrown at a far off wall.
More punches and these were harder and faster than ever. The room spun faster, and the scene faded from full vivid colors to bright white to nothing and back again. On some level Knockout hoped he would die, beaten to death and free of a life that had been a nightmare for as long as he knew. But on some other level he needed to live, needed to save himself.
"Please stop," he screamed. "I don't understand what I did wrong. Please!"
He was awake on top of his recharge station, and he could see the ceiling above him again. But still he shook and trembled, and forced back another begging scream, more than aware that he'd started to scream out loud again.
"Knockout, can I please come in there?" a voice from outside the door made him want to turn to look for it. But he only stared at he ceiling still shaking hard, and sure that no matter what he was seeing above him, another hit or five were sure to come any second. His optics blinked in and out of fucous. He saw reality, he saw the flashback images again and he saw nothing at all. It all came and went again rapidly until he was dizzy and crying and shaking harder while he question what was real.
"Hey listen. Your door is not locked. I'm going to come in there, okay?" A female voice. A familiar Autobot. Knockout mumbled permission, without knowing if she heard anything but nonsense. With his optics only partly seeing anything real, he saw Arcee walk into the room quickly, but felt rather than saw her sit on the edge of the recharge station.
"You okay?"
He heard the questionand understood it, but still it took a moment before he gave an answer. "I'm alright. I… just dozed off reading and I guess I had a terrible dream."
"Wanna talk about it?" He sat up with more trouble then he knew simple disorientation from a dream should have caused. He moved to sit beside her, as she asked her question.
"I wouldn't even know where to begin to explain it all," he looked at around the room, feeling slightly better, and yet not quite right at all.
"Well if you ever feel like talking any of us can at least listen."
"I know. And thanks."
"The kids should be back soon." Arcee laughed a little. "Apparently Miko brought some movies with her from home, and her and Bulk' are hosting a Japanese horror film marathon tonight. Do you actually even watch movies?"
"I do. I used to like the drive-in. I notice though that movies are most often completely unrealistic."
"I think that's part of the point. Humans enjoy escaping into fantasies of the impossible. The perfect romance, super powers, meeting the stuff of nightmares and surviving with barely a scratch. The list just goes on."
Knockout laughed, and then he changed the subject abruptly. "Why were you at my door?"
"I was about to knock on it," Arcee answered simply. "I came to find you. Ratchet sent me. But I heard screaming and you didn't sound too good..."
"I'm sorry..."
"Don't be sorry. Never be sorry for anything like that. It's hardly your fault."
"Did Ratchet say what he wanted?"
"He said he wanted to..." Arcee's words disappeared into nothing, as Knockout processor began to ring for a moment at a high pitch. Then the ringing gave way to more hard and painful banging.
"You sure you're alright?" Arcee questioned. The pain was gone as fast as it had come and he nodded, forcing a smile onto his face-plate.
"Fine, fine. I was just… I think the nightmares still have me a bit distracted… We should get out of here."
Arcee nodded, and offered a hand to pull him to his feet, quite obviously in a way that was both helpful and deliberately silly. Obviously she had bought his excuse, and for that he was relieved. She or any of the bots would only have dragged him to medical if he admitted to unexplained pain, and that was the last place he wanted to be dragged, especially then.
Both of them stepped into the hall and the door banged shut behind them. They stood for a moment exchanging idle chit-chat about nothing, and then laughing a little over a remembered scene from some ridiculous movie both happened to have stumbled across. He felt better and the pain had gone.
"Well, I need to hit the wash station. I think I'm due for some polish too," Arcee said as her laughs died to giggles. She held up an arm, and looked it over. "I'm getting dingy and very scratched up."
"You'd be just as pretty no matter how dull your paint gets," Knockout blurted, barely thinking and still half laughing.
Arcee was about to walk off. Her back was already turned to him. But she whipped around fast to face him again. Her mouth dropped open slightly in a look of surprise and then her face-plate showed as entirely confused.
"Knockout…. What….?"
"I'm simply saying..." he said grinning at her.
"Go on and speak to Ratchet," she said. She shook her head slightly, but otherwise she was clearly choosing to ignore his comment. She smiled at him though for reasons obviously unrelated. "He said something about creating an Autobot symbol for you."
"Really?"
"Its hardly a mandatory step, at least not yet. But if you're ready to change symbols, then… yeah."
She walked away and Knockout stood still for a moment before he turned to walk off toward Ratchet's office. He took a step and his left foot tripped over the right, sending him stumbling. He caught his balance before he fell stupidly to the floor and walked a good ten paces before he realized he'd started to walk in the wrong direction. Slowly, shaking his head to chase away a sense of confusion he knew was not exactly normal, he walked a couple of paces headed the right way, before another pain shot across his processor. He stood in one place, hands pressed against his head, and optics blinking as the room spun a bit. The pain was gone once again as fast as it had appeared, but this time, instead of quickly entirely, better he was left with a steady ache from somewhere inside the circuity within his processor.
Scene Break Scene Break Scene Break Scene Break Scene Break Scene Break
The big doors at the front of the base skid open and Smokescreen roared in, in his vehicle mode. He skidded to a screeching stop in the middle of the open floor of the main level. His doors popped open to deposit human children and grocery bags, before he promptly transformed into his bot mode.
The group of bots that stood or sat around in the room looked from Smokescreen to the children and back again, and then at each other with questioning expressions.
Ratchet finally spoke up, when it seemed clear none of the others were going to. "Hmm…. Have we lost one? Where is Jack?"
Raf wandered off to the kitchenette space with the grocery bags, and left Miko to stand in the midst of huge Autobots with a look on her face somewhere between sad and exasperated. Bulkhead hurried to her, and scooped her up with his hands, placing her on one of his shoulders so she was not looking up at the bots knees.
"Thanks Bulk. Yeah, Jack's not coming. I dunno exactly what his problem is. Well I do know… kinda soft of, I think. But… Hmph, he's just being stupid!" Sitting on her partner, she held her balance perfectly and planted her hands on her hips, while a look of annoyance showed on her face.
"My fault, I fear," Knockout said, from his place, sitting on a bench across the room. He shook his head sadly.
"Oh no, so totally not your fault," Miko said, probably a bit too loud for an indoor space. "You can't go around blaming yourself because humans wanna be dumb! Fine, we will all just have fun without him, and he'll miss movie night! It's gotta be a male thing..."
"Uh Miko," Bulkhead said, with a half confused look on his face-plate, "Almost all of the Autobots are..."
"Yeah, I know that." If it was possible, Miko looked even more exasperated. "But you are Cybertronians. That's different. I'm talking about human boys."
"But I'm..." Raf walked into the room, now minus the grocery bags. Every one of the bots was laughing out loud by that time. Even Ratchet had started to laugh with the group and that was saying a lot. Miko, still sitting on Bulkhead, trying to keep her balance as his frame trembled with laughter, glared from one to the next, the only one in the room clearly not amused.
"Not you either, Raf," she clarified, still far from laughing, even as the younger human joined in. "You're the smart kind of human male."
"Maybe I should call Jack," Arcee mused, when her concern began to overshadow the humor of the moment. "Miko, do you think he's alright?"
"He looked fine to me. He just said something about how everything is changing and nothing is the way it was. I guess he just doesn't like change. Oh and June is a bit upset and he's her son, so… yeah."
"That would explain why Agent Fowler never dropped by yet today..." Arcee mused.
Knockout opened his mouth to speak again, but made no immediate sound. For a long moment he just sat staring at the group and then his human friend, and then finally the floor, still silently.
"Knockout," Bumblebee said, finally speaking up himself. He stood holding Raf in his hands, but gestured to the red bot with his optics. "Don't you dare think this is your problem. I'm sure this will all work itself out."
"Hey, you have an Autobot symbol now!" Miko exclaimed, pointing toward her newest teammate and grinning, as she finally noticed it for the first time. Knockout grinned back.
"That's pretty cool," Raf said. He gestured politely for 'Bee to put him down, and he walked slowly toward the red bot. He paused, standing still, a few paces from the feet of the seated bot, and looked up at him. After a moment he said, his voice still quiet as it had been every other of the few times he'd spoken to him, "I guess if you're really going to be one of the Autobots, I can't just keep being scared of you forever."
"I… think we are all working on… working everything... everything is working out..." Knockout started to answer before his words became strangely a little but confused. His blinked once and then again, obviously trying to shake off the glitch between his processor and vocalizer. "We are all still working everything out."
"You really do want to be an Autobot," he muttered, slowly. It was more than obvious he had until then had his own, probably well to be expected, doubts about the whole matter.
"Yes, I do," Knockout answered. He looked down at the small human, standing still at his feet.
"Isn't it dangerous, braking from the Decepticons?" Raf questioned, seriously.
Knockout said nothing at all for a moment, instead taking a while to consider his answer carefully. For a moment his hand went to the side of his head and blinked his optics again several times. Finally he said, "Defectors, if captured are punished as traitors, and probably killed. I would have been declared an enemy, as soon as I left them. Far more hated than any Autobot. Still though I did what I… did what I.. I had what I did… no, I did what I wanted for a long time."
Bumblebee stepped quickly behind the boy and quickly scooped his little partner up to place him onto his shoulder panel. "We'll just need to keep him from ever getting captured. This is hardly the first time we've had a situation like this. Knockout, are you alright?"
"I'm just fine of course," the red bot answered. He did sound better, his strange vocal glitching resolved. "Just.. having a little trouble forming a sentence today."
"I dunno," Bulkhead said, from across the room. "That sounded pretty bad to me too."
Most of the bots in the room, as well as both of the humans that sat perched on two of them, all turned slowly to look in Ratchet's direction, all asking without speaking a word, what he thought of that. The old medic had been paying attention from the start, and was already on his feet ready to move at any second. Knockout only sat where he was, shaking his head slightly over the whole situation, and staring mostly toward the floor.
"I'm fine," he said, when the old bot walked toward him quickly, the scanner he tended to keep with him in his storage compartment, already in his hand. He waved him off stubbornly with his hand and refused to meet his, or anyone's, optics. "I'm perfectly fine."
Ratchet stood beside Knockout for a moment, shaking his head, and quite obviously looking for anything else that might have been immediately concerning. He put the scanner away and hook his head again, grumbling to himself under his intakes.
"Alright," he announced finally, his tone far from pleased. "Well, you clearly are not having any more glitches at the moment. Although this quite clearly happened for a reason and that is certainly concerning. The only reason I'm not dragging you into the medbay for tests, and ready to tie you up to force your co-operation if necessary, is because of your Autobot initiation, and I know it's important to you."
"Thank you for you're..." Knockout started to say, but Ratchet interrupted him at once with a hand in the air and a firm look across his white face-plate.
"Oh, I'm keeping a close optic on you. I swear to Primus, now I remember why I never exactly liked treating my fellow medics. I can hardly stand a battle of wills with anyone almost as stubborn and determined as myself. Later on, you are getting scanned and assessed and I don't care if you keep on looking better or not!"
"Okay, okay," Knockout waved a hand through the air in a gesture of assent. He gave a nervous chuckle. "You have my willing surrender."
"Thank you," the old medic snapped, his slight amusement now betraying him. "Miko, you ready?"
"You bet," Miko said, with clear excitement. She poked her bot partner gently with her finger once to get his attention. "Goin' down, Bulk'"
As soon as Bulkhead, had set her down on the floor, she ran to the middle of the room, mindful of Bulkhead's large feet as he took a step backward. Knockout nearly stumbled forward, tripping over his own right foot as he stood up from his seat. The same foot nearly came right out from under him once, nearly sending him falling clumsily over as soon as he had taken a few steps.
"I don't like this in the slightest," Ratchet mumbled to Arcee, who stood next to him. He spoke so quietly that only she heard him say anything at all.
"I don't like it either," she whispered back, discretely. "He was not well earlier, to be honest with you. Of course he tried to play it off, and I think he assumes I bought it."
"I should drag him straight to the medbay this instant… if this wasn't so important to him, I swear..."
"Ratchet, do you have any what's the matter with him…?"
"Could be a number of things. Most explanations are simple ones. Let's not worry about anything serious while it isn't."
Miko stood in the middle of the floor, looking up at Knockout, who was of course many times taller than she was. Quickly, and by now happily, and with her earlier outburst of frustration entirely forgotten, she took several steps backwards, simply trying to comfortably look him in the optics. She bumped against Ratchet's foot, and sat down on top of it for a second thinking. She got back up and waked forward again. Knockout had sat down on the floor of the room, as he had been earlier advised to do. When she came closer to him again, he held his hands, out, clearly suggesting a workable idea.
"That'll work," Miko shrugged, hopping on. The rest of the gathered group chuckled along with them both.
The little human sat balancing perfectly held in the palms of the bit bot's hands, spoke up partly from memorized lines, and mostly from the messy notes she'd scribbled in gel pen ink on her arm. "On behalf of the world of Cybertron, nominated by the Autobots to speak on behalf of themselves and their world, I first welcome the new Autobot, designation; Knockout, to the cause of peace and equality among people."
It was all but unnoticed by any of the bots, but the fact that she was obviously reading her notes written in Japanese, while speaking out loud in English, certainly had Raf impressed.
"First, it is asked that you be given a moment to explain, in your own words, why exactly you wish to be an Autobot?"
Knockout had had time to consider his answer well in advance, but still he considered a moment or two. Finally he spoke thoughtfully. "It's been said so often that in war, we must know our enemies. I got to know more and more about mine, and eventually it seemed the more I looked for the control, hunger for power, blood lust, and rage that I was taught to fight against, the more I saw such things in the team I fought for instead. Where I was once taught to see superiority, and pride, instead the more I studied both sides, the more I understood that I and so many more, only lived in constant fear of failure instead. I want to be part of the side on which I might learn something, and far more, might actually save a planet instead of simply helping to further enslave it."
The group of Autobots, along with two humans, listened as she spoke to them. Most of them nodded approval at his explanation. Ratchet still closely observed him, still clearly nervous about the obvious health issue, but when the bot continued to speak clearly, he backed off a bit and simply listened to what he was saying.
Knockout continued on, still considering his words, "Obviously the 'winning team' thing has become somewhat of a running inside joke, as the humans might say. But I think we need to be clear one why it will always be the winner and why that matters do much. Fear, bullying, oppression and worse are never going to get us anywhere and the more I learned that, the more I knew I wanted to fight against such…"
He stopped talking mid-sentence and sat for several seconds, staring straight ahead with a blank look. With a couple of slight blinks and a look of momentary confusion, he started to speak again. "I knew I wanted to fight against such oppression of… such against wanted… wanted to against… no no, wanted to… wanted to… such…"
He sat on the floor, still holding the small human in his hands, and she held on, trying to balance as both hands began to tremble and then shake harder. Knockout opened his mouth to speak again, and instead of any coherent words, his vocalizer only buzzed with static with a changing and strange pitch to it. He moved to lower his hands, trying to set the human onto the floor. Miko could quite safely have climbed down. She had always climbed bots, clambering up and down, using gent metal limbs as hand and foot holds. But she didn't. Instead she just sat where she was, holding her balance as his hands went on trembling and looking at his rapidly blinking optics, and obviously determined to work out how to help.
"Hey," she said, her tone impressively confidant. "Whats the matter? Can you hear me? Can you talk?"
Knockout slightly focused his optics down at the human that still balanced on him. He might have seen her to a point, and it was clear he could hear her, but his gaze was still clearly focused mostly on nothing at all, and went straight back to starring straight ahead again. He opened his mouth to speak again and there was only more static. This time the noise eventually ended in a terrible shriek that could only have been pain and probably panic. His optics opened in terror as he tried to speak again, never one to give up trying to do anything, and only produced more awful noise.
"Miko!" Ratchet almost yelled at the human, without meaning to shout. "Get down onto the floor. And step way back. Now." He ran forward a step, a hand already outstretched and ready to snatch up the human.
"Ratchet," Miko questioned, her own voice shaking. "What's the mater with him? I don't think this is another panic attack."
"It isn't," the old medic answered fast, already thinking of ten things at once, and ready to start issuing orders when needed. "Miko, are you able to get down?"
"Yeah," she answered, as she turned to climb down fast.
If Knockout had only stayed on the floor in his seated position, the situation would have been as close to ideal as anyone could have gotten in such a situation. But clearly he was beginning to panic. He screamed in what could only have been complete terror at something he was no longer in a state to understand. Static came right behind his horrible screaming, and instead of staying put, he got to his knees. Miko scrambled to get down, meaning to simply hop from his hands and jump to the floor in order to ran backwards fast. But Knockout's hands dropped her before she could jump. She landed on the hard floor backward and with a light thump.
Ratchet stepped forward with a scanner in one hand and the other ready again to grab the human. He could have kicked himself for not just grabbed her fast a second before, but then, any sudden motion might have made everything worse. He reached for Miko, and she scrambled to get up, and she reached for him to scoop her up. Bulkhead had stepped forward by that second, and a couple more bots were slowly following his example. Ratchet held up the hand that held the med scanner. Motioning them back. He knew this whole thing was going to get worse by the second and he simply couldn't work with a tightening crowd.
Ratchet moved to grab Miko, as she scrambled backwards. He waved the group back again. Knockout gave another, much louder scream of horror and this time it was clearly pain too. His hands went to his head, and his optics were entirely unfocused now, while leaking a stream of washer fluid. His whole body shook with increasing force. His integrated weapons activated from both of his hands and any one nearly by could only be thankful that no one had been in the way of either. It was clear he hadn't done that deliberately. It was just as clearly that he lacked any control over deactivating them again.
"I… am… I… what… what… what… help… help me… I… help..." His voice was beginning to work again, though still barely so.. It was at the second that he fell to one side, from his now awkwardly half kneeling position and straight toward the floor. He'd been close enough to the railing for the straits tot he upper level, that his face-plate slammed against it hard as he fell. It was more than enough force to bend the edge of the railing and a growing pool of energon spread from underneath the bots head, as he lay almost face down on the floor.
"Miko!" Bulkhead yelled. He stepped, forward, optics darting from one direction to the next. "Where's Miko gone?"
"I think I saw her run backward," Smokescreen said, trying to be helpful. But his voice was doubtful of what he had seen.
"If she was not able to run clear before..." Bulkhead didn't finish the thought. He didn't need to and there was no time."
"Someone help me, please," Ratchet said. Knockout was silent now and completely unmoving, as the old medic rolled him over to lay face up. The group of Autobot's – and Raf, sitting in Bumblebee's hands and shaking slightly himself – all looked on, barely able to make themselves move.
Knockout's faceplate had been quite clearly smashed by the terrible impact with the railing. He was bleeding badly and his weapons were still activated. There was still no sign of the little human girl.
"Someone look for Miko," Ratchet said, from his position, working down on the floor. "she must have run off somewhere. She's probably upset, but I don't think she got hurt. A couple more of you, come here and help me."
Bulkhead run off at once to find his partner. No one would have expected it to be any different. Arcee joined Ratchet, on the floor ready to be useful. Bumblebee passed Raf over to Smokescreen, and moved to help too. Knockout began to shake and tremble again, and the static was quickly back. Now his right foot kicked against the floor repeatedly, but with varied degrees of force and no clear reason for it.
"Ratchet," Acree questioned, struggling to keep her voice from shaking. The medic had pulled Knockout's arm up, and she took a firm hold of it without needing to be asked. She watched as Ratchet worked, as gently as he could to access a panel and deactivate the weapons system. "What's wrong with him?"
Knockout's blinked opened and closed, and dimmed and brighter again. Barely coherent and gasping in terror he mumbled again, "help... Help me... Help help..."
"It's okay, we're trying to help you," Arcee told him wonder all the while just how much he could understand. "You need to stay calm and let us work, okay."
"I need to make further assessments when we get him to the medbay in a minute,". ratchet told her and anyone else that was listening. "But I believe his processor is badly glitching and is starting to fail."
Note/ And… I'm just gonna end this chapter here, because it's already long and because I feel like being one of those types again, and ending with a cliff hanger, because I can. Mostly though it's just already long enough and it was due time to hurry and update already. Next one coming soon…