Disclaimer: I own nothing related to Divergent. All rights reserved to Veronica Roth.
Chapter One: Who are you, really?
Tris
Embracing life in Dauntless is more complex than I could've imagined. Being ranked first in our last stage of initiation, I had unlimited options of jobs and living spaces. I seriously gave no thought as to what I would do after initiation, so focused on simply surviving each day. I considered joining the leadership, until I remembered the look on my father's face at the Choosing Ceremony, and Marcus Eaton, and Eric. Suddenly that option felt like torture.
Becoming a professional fighter was at the bottom of my list, and though being a tattoo artist sounded appealing - I lacked the artistic ability. I spent hours in Tobias's arms as he tried to persuade me to join City Security with him. For a while he had me convinced, and then I realized that I cannot make smart decisions while Tobias has his hands on me in any way.
One night at dinner, Malcolm – a wiry, heavily pierced man who works with Tobias sat next to us. They were talking about something that happened with the cameras during the day, but all I heard were codes and sequences that were gibberish to me, but apparently held great meaning to the pair of them. When we got back to Tobias's apartment that night, I told him the truth.
"I don't even know how to work a computer!"
He smirked, setting his toothbrush back in its place on the edge of the sink.
"It'll take time, but you'll learn. I figured it out, and you're faster on your feet than me."
I jumped up from the bed and crossed over to him, pointing at his chest.
"You said yourself that you're unexpectedly good with computers!" I closed my eyes with a sigh. "I just … don't want a job that I know nothing about."
He grabbed my shoulders then and pulled me toward him, stroking his thumbs across the tattoos that represent both of our pasts and our present. His heavy, dark eyebrows held a crease between them and his lower full lip jutted out slightly further than usual.
He gripped my chin with deft, strong fingers and pulled me in for a kiss. He tasted like spearmint toothpaste and something else that's entirely him - indescribable.
He rested his forehead against mine.
"I'm sorry," he breathed. "I just want to have you with me. Whatever you decide, I'll back you."
We kissed, and City Security was out.
Three weeks after initiation, I still hadn't picked a job and I felt more pressure than ever. Eric cornered me on my way to breakfast to one morning, which only made things worse.
"Everyone else in your class has been assigned already. You're the last one. I can't house you with an undeclared profession, and I'm running out of patience." He said while pulling on his lip rings.
"I've had a lot on my mind."
He smiled, and my hands instinctively clenched into fists.
"A lot on your mind, huh?" He laughed, leaning in close. "Maybe it's all those late nights with Four. I thought I was fucking losing it when I saw you, a Stiff, sneaking out of his apartment in the middle of the night."
I moved to step around him, but he grabbed my arm and squeezed painfully to keep me in place.
"You should really be more careful, Tris. I'm not the only one watching. Maybe you did something a little extra to earn that rank. "
I ripped my arm away, and moved to meet his eyeline.
"And here I thought conspiracy theories were just for the Erudite. I guess both us should really be more careful, Eric."
He threw his head back in a roaring laugh.
I was already walking away when he yelled for me to make my decision by the end of the week. I spent the rest of the day fuming. I left a note in Tobias's apartment to meet me at The Chasm.
He sat behind me on the huge rock, nestling me between his legs. He wrapped his arms around me, and traced the tattoos on my chest.
"I have to make my decision by the end of this week."
"Says who?"
His breath next to my ear sent shivers down my spine.
"Eric."
Tobias went tense. I kissed his forearm.
"He's right, and you know it. I've taken long enough."
He didn't say anything, but I knew he agreed.
After weeks of stalling, I finally figured out why. Choosing a job would secure my place, my life in Dauntless. It's exactly what I wanted, all I could think about since the day I defected, but it came with a price – severing all ties with Abnegation and my family.
"What do you think I should do?" I asked Tobias.
He was quiet for a while.
"You should train the initiates. You're compassionate and reliable, and you're a quick study. You'd be a good example for them."
"But Christina is training the initiates-"
"She's training the Dauntless-Born. They still need one for the transfers." He pulled my hair back from my face to stroke my neck.
I thought for a moment.
"It would be nice to help them the way you helped me."
"You better not," he growled into my neck.
I laughed as his grip tightened around me.
"Not like that! I just meant it was nice to have someone on my side when I was so out of my element, and to have someone to trust when I couldn't trust anyone ... But what will I do once initiation is over? You have to have a second job, right?"
He nods.
"I heard they're looking for someone in the Weapons Lab. They oversee the manufacturing of all the weapons for the compound, and they help train people how to use the new inventions. That could be good."
I thought about it – remembering the heavy, grounding weight of a gun in my hand; and the cold, smooth surface of a knife flying through my fingers. Each time I've worked with weapons, I've felt like a live wire – powerful and fearsome.
"You might be a genius. Maybe you should've gone blue."
He laughed softly. I turned in his lap to touch my forehead to his.
"I look better in black," he replied, "and so do you."
With the roar of the river only a few feet below us and the mist spraying over our feet, we kissed and we planned.
Edited: 11/18/2020