Chapter 15: Beginning of the End

Over the next two week Scarlett's stay in hospital became difficult due to the reason she had been brought here in the first place she was now undergoing counselling.

Sherlock didn't visit as much as she would like and when he did it seemed to be all at the wrong time. The nurse wheeled her back to her room and helped her onto her bed as the tears still washed over Scarlett's face. Physically she was healing far quicker than the doctor had expected and she was getting better by the day, but her psychological side was in pieces. She had done so well at pushing it deep down underneath everything else and simply be happy she was alive and not allow this overwhelming horror to swallow her whole. The counselling didn't work the way she had wanted it to, she wanted it to help her cope, not bring it all back up and leave her in a weeping mess time and time again. It was bad enough that in a few months time she would have to go to court and face Theo all over again.

The nurse left her in her state of quiet remorse and Scarlett cared little she did not want people watching her grieve her own life. She stared aimlessly at the wall beside the door in front of her and allowed the tears to fall. She felt so weak to allow herself to be this way but she couldn't stop. Horrors had been committed to her and she would never forget, she sometimes wished she had died back at that house, maybe it would have been easier that way.

The only thought she clung to was of Sherlock, but as she analysed it. Was there really anything there other than her unrequited love for him. So they had kiss more than one, and one time if not for John's poor timing may have even slept together and yes there appeared to be this so called 'weaker' side to Sherlock which presented itself when they were alone, but could she be sure that that was anything more than lust. The two times she had seen it appeared to be just that, but maybe she had missed it maybe she was so caught up in her world she didn't notice. But nevertheless she felt a yearning for him almost constantly that was much more than simple lust. But she would not cling to him as her life raft out, she would have to escape herself.

She didn't notice the door open as her eyes were now shut as she sobbed quietly, having pushed her body into a ball of misery.

"Scarlett are you OK" said a voice she recognised as John and she simply shook her head.

"What happened" John said and she could hear him sit down at one of the chairs beside her bed, but sensed another presence in the doorway.

"I wanted to be strong, I wanted so badly to not let him break me." she said her voice was quiet and slow.

"I know it's hard but we are here for you, If you ever want to talk" said John and something inside Scarlett woke her. She opened her eyes and turned herself to look at him, barely noticing Sherlock in the doorway.

"You wouldn't want to know what happened" she said shaking her head at him slightly.

"Maybe not but I'd listen anyway" John said to her. Scarlett looked at him and the turned away again sitting flat against the back of the bed and staring at the ceiling.

"You know it's funny, for some reason I always thought after a while your brain just stopped telling you it hurt. But it didn't stop, I was only there for five days that's all just five. But it felt like an eternity. I didn't sleep, he wouldn't let me. I was cold and hungry and tired. More than once I wished for you both to break through the door and save me. But even more than that I wished I would die, so it would all be over. That is how I felt because of what happened, so no John I don't think you would listen. You would pretence but the horror would never sink in, because you weren't there, you would never understand." Said Scarlett and her eyes dropped to Sherlock who looked stern and she smiled at him.

"He raped me 7 times and beat me more than I could count, he drugged me and he forced me to do things to him. But never once did he threaten my life. Maybe he knew some part of me wanted to die, or maybe he knew that he had a far better bargaining chip in threatening other people around me. Its funny how things like that bring your whole life into perspective. I'm gonna quit my job, not sure what I'm going to do instead but I'm sure I'll work it out. I gonna get what I want for my life. It made me think about my friends and family.

He threatened Sammie and I begged him not to hurt her, He threaten my parents and again I begged, he threatened you, John and my god did I beg. But when he got to you, Sherlock. I didn't beg. I just offered my life instead. I'm not sure if it's because I have feelings for you or if you are far more needed in this world than I am but either way, to him your were a bargaining chip to get me to submit, to me you were a life line that I clung to every night when he left me in the dark, swallowing my own blood and trying not to pass out again." Scarlett wasn't sure why she had told them all this, it just seemed once it started to come out she couldn't make it stop.

"I found you, not because it was a case, but because I needed to find you. I needed you back" said the detective staring her straight in the eyes his face blank. For a second the pair just stared at each other before Scarlett turned away, her once emerald eyes had faded to a mucky green and she truly looked broken. Sherlock could do no more for her, she needed to climb out of this pit herself, but he knew he would wait for her at the top.

"I need to be alone now, until I'm well again both physically and mentally. I promise I will get out of this, but I need to do it alone. I need to find my strength again. When I'm well I will come to the flat and see you but until then I think I should be alone" said Scarlett looking between the pair.

"Scarlett no, we want to support you, we want to help" John insisted and Scarlett smiled sadly.

"You have been supporting me but I need to do this bit on my own. Please John if you want to support me you will leave. I only have another week in hospital anyway so it's not long to wait" Scarlett said and she looked up as Sherlock nodded to her before without a word he turned on his heel and left.

John looked to the door where Sherlock had just left and back at Scarlett again.

"I'm not leaving, I'll be back tomorrow" he said as he grabbed his coat and chased after Sherlock. Scarlett simply shook her head, as she watched the door shut behind him.

John was back the next day as promised but Scarlett was even more broken then the day before, she wept for the whole time he was there and refused to allow him to hug her or comfort her in anyway.

"She did ask you not to go" said Sherlock, when John returned to the flat and told Sherlock and Mrs Hudson about his visit.

"You can't be serious Sherlock, she's in pain. Am I really supposed to allow her to sit alone crying." John demanded and Sherlock simply looked up at him calmly.

"Yes as her friend you should respect her wishes." Sherlock replied before looking back at his computer screen and as much as John wanted to not allow himself to do as the taller man had said, he found it increasingly difficult to find time to see Scarlett as a new case planted it self on their plate, after visiting the bank one day and meeting a certain banker named Sebastian.

In the hospital Scarlett was glad of the time alone, strangely alone she was able to focus on her own feelings and tackle them one by one. Her injury's were healing well and she only had 2 more weeks in plaster with her wrist, her stomach was healing fast and she was now able to walk alone. The doctors had given her another week in hospital and she was looking forward to leaving, her ribs were now almost completely healed and moving no longer hurt as much. But her improved state also brought along the unwelcome visitors. Her lawyer had visited three times in the last two days, taking statements from herself as well as doctors and her gynaecologist.

Today was the three days to go mark, she had been move out of ICU a few days ago and now was in a shared ward with other patients, though she enjoyed the idle chat she didn't appreciate the noisy questions when she returned from counselling.

When her lawyer walked in that evening around dinner time. His face was unreadable and Scarlett felt her stomach knot, something had happened.

He sat down and looked at her quietly for a minute before he spoke.

"As you know Mr Riley is being remanded in a custody until the trial. Early this morning his body was found face down in the toilet of the cell, his cell admitted to beating and killing Mr Riley late last night. Due to this the court has closed the case and we will pursue no further with this. Have you any questions for me?" he asked looking at her sadly.

"No" said Scarlett her mouth slightly agape as she tried to process this information. She wasn't sure if she felt a lack of closure or if she was happy the sick bastard was dead.

"Can you go to my friends and tell them all this news please" Scarlett said finally looking her lawyer in the face.

"Yes of course, what is their address?" he asked talking out his phone to note down what she said.

"221b Baker Street, Sherlock Holmes and Doctor John Watson. Tell them I'm OK I don't need them to come here, I just wanted them to know" said Scarlett nodding her head slightly.

A nurse approached with Scarlett's dinner and her lawyer simply nodded.

"It was pleasure as always, Miss Monroe, I hope you get better soon" he said standing up, the pair shook hands before he left and she sat back in her bed, suddenly not feeling very hungry any more.

As promised after 3 more days she was discharged from hospital with a strict regime of a healthy high calorie diet, not much exercise and no sex. The last one made her laugh this was the last thing on her mind at the moment. She would have to return in a week to have the cast on her wrist removed and then it could take up to another 6 weeks to get full strength in it again. As well a her counselling still had another 5 sessions till completion, though she felt she was coping much better than before.

Mrs Hudson was surprised to see her when she arrived that lunchtime and explained that John and Sherlock were out on a case.

"I wasn't really here to see them, I just wanted to get my stuff and my puppy and go home" Scarlett said with a smiled.

Mrs Hudson helped her pack up her stuff as an unfathomably excited Great Dane jumped around them. She told Mrs Hudson she would visit when she was feeling more herself and left it at that. The walk home was strange, somewhere in the back of her mind a voice was telling her to be scared but her strength was returning and pushing that voice further and further away and she knew she was going to be OK. This really was the beginning of the end of her nightmare.