When the baby burro was born, and not responsive, Evan began to massage it. Hard. He used the end of his t-shirt to try and wipe

mucus from the baby's nostrils. He put his finger in it's nose, to try to stimulate breathing. I watched, a lump in my throat. He worked

at it for a few minutes. I wasn't sure just how long. Ford kneeled down beside him, and wordlessly, they switched places, and Ford began

to do the massaging.

After a couple more minutes, Evan shook his head. "It's no use, Ford."

Ford looked reluctant, and went on massaging the baby burro for a bit longer. Then, he stopped, and sat back on his heels.

Guthrie and Nancy were standing, and I was on my knees beside Evan. The five of us were silent for a few moments, and then

Evan sighed, and stood up. I reached out to touch the baby burro. He was beautiful. At least to me, he was.

"He's perfect," I said. "What happened?"

"I don't know, Har," Evan said, and gave another sigh.

Nancy came over to kneel beside me. She wrapped her arm around my shoulders. And was silent. Just supportive.

I was grateful for her presence. Twenty minutes or more had passed, and I thought the mother burro should be

getting to her feet.

Evan read my worried glance at him, and said, "She's just tired, I think."

Now that she was thru the labor and birth, the female burro seemed to resent our presence. She kept flopping and

thrashing around.

"Let's back off," Ford said. "We're upsetting her."

I got up reluctantly, not wanting to just leave the baby lying there.

"I'll go get the tractor and loader," Ford said quietly, and Evan nodded.

"I'll go with ya," Guthrie said.

The two of them started walking back towards the barn.

I knew what they were planning to do, but Nancy asked, "What for?"

"We need to bury the baby," Evan said, in explanation. "She'll stay with it, and grieve until it's buried."

"Oh," Nancy said, looking shaken. "I didn't know they did that."

Evan crouched down again, and then said, "I'm gonna see if we have some Methergine. She's bleeding pretty badly."

"Do we have any?" I asked.

"I'll check. Come on."

"I want to stay here until you come back," I protested.

"Now, Har," Evan began.

"I'll stay with her," Nancy spoke up.

"Well, okay," Evan said, sounding reluctant. "But, don't crowd the Jenny. Peppy might get aggressive."

"Who's Peppy?" Nancy asked, looking confused.

"Dad," Evan modified, nodding towards the male burro.

After he'd gone, Nancy and I stood there, mostly in silence. She'd taken hold of my hand. The male burro stayed close

to the female, occasionally lowering his head to sniff at her.

"He wanted to get help for her," I said. "That's why he was calling for so long."

In answer, Nancy squeezed my hand harder. Standing there, I had the sudden thought of worry about Isaac.

"Where's the baby?" I asked Nancy.

"Marie stopped by to visit. She's at the house with him," Nancy told me.

"Oh," I said, relieved. "That's good."

The boys were back with the tractor and front end loader, Guthrie standing beside Ford as he drove. Evan was back, too. He'd

used the four-wheeler.

He came back over, and asked Guthrie to hold the female's head while he tried to insert a pill into her throat.

"I can do it," I said.

"You're not strong enough, if she gets to thrashing around," Evan said.

They did that, or attempted to. I couldn't tell if the pill got down, or not. Evan got a bit of hay that he'd brought,

and set it on the ground. Then he got up, going to put the supplies of the medicine back on the four-wheeler.

He and Ford began discussing the best place to bury the dead baby. They were tossing around suggestions such as

the fence row of our property. I listened, and then stepped up closer.

"Could we do it in the meadow?" I asked. "Where that big Oak tree is?"

The boys exchanged looks. The meadow was further away.

I knew that. I knew that they were tired after working all day. I knew that they were both fed up with my mouth. I knew that they were

irritated because I'd gone on my own to hunt the burro. I knew that they'd both already gone above and beyond, what they had to do to help the burros.

"Please," I said. I didn't drag out the word, or try to interject pity. I just said it, looking at them both.

Ford sort of nodded, and Evan said, "Alright."

"I don't suppose you'd go to the house," Nancy said, giving me a resigned look.

I shook my head. "I want to go with them."

So she and Guthrie and I walked, as Evan and Ford took the tractor, with the baby burro. When we got to the meadow,

we found a spot directly under the tree, and Ford began working the loader, digging a hole.

Once the hole was dug, and the little burro was placed in it, Ford began to cover the hole. When he was done, all three of the guys took

shovels and began to pat the ground down, making it even and flat again. That way any predators would be less likely to dig up the body.

When they were done with that, we stood, for a few minutes. Nobody said anything.

Ford and Guthrie moved to start walking back, as Evan got on the tractor to drive.

"Come on, Har," Guthrie said, his tone kind.

"I'm coming," I said. I was the last to leave the makeshift grave. Once back at the site of the two adult burros, we saw that

the female had gotten to her feet. Probably, I thought, because she wondered where we were taking her baby.

By now the sun was nearly down, its color orange.

I was still hesitating around the two burros, and Ford said, in a tone that suggested no argument, "We'll check on her in the morning. Let's

go up to the house."

I gave in, gracefully. I figured I was already in for a talking-to from him, anyway. I didn't want to make it any worse.

7

Evan and Nancy walked ahead, with Guthrie a bit behind. Ford fell into step beside me.

He was quiet for awhile, and I knew he was thinking out what he wanted to say to me.

"Sometimes I don't get you," he said.

"Well, we're even then," I quipped. "Sometimes I don't even get myself."

"Stop with the funny comments," he ordered.

"Okay."

"You've been a giant pain all day long," he said, and I could feel him watching me, as we walked.

"I know," I admitted.

"And don't use your diabetes as an excuse, either," Ford went on.

"Okay. I won't."

"Don't you have anything else to say?" he countered.

"I'm not going to argue with you," I said. "You're right."

Ford sighed. "Well, what's the matter?"

"I don't know. It's just one of those days, I guess."

He was giving me a doubting look then.

"I'll try to do better, Ford," I said, and I meant it.

"Okay," he said, after a couple of moment's hesitation.

7

Back at the house, Marie was sitting in the porch swing, holding Isaac. She talked for a few minutes to all of us, and

then said she needed to get going. As she left, she leveled a look at me, and took hold of my arm.

"The boys were worried about where you'd gotten off to," she told me, looking disapproving.

"I know."

Marie ran her hand over my hair. "I won't scold," she said. "I know they'll do that themselves."

When she'd gone, Guthrie went to take a shower. Evan, who'd already had his, began to wash up at the kitchen sink, scrubbing off

the itch from the tall grass, and the blood from the birth.

I went upstairs, changing to clean shorts and t-shirt, and scrubbing up in Hannah's bathroom.

When I went back downstairs, Ford was heading up to take Guthrie's spot in the shower.

Nancy was in the kitchen, along with Evan, and they were investigating the supply of snacks. Without saying anything, I went

down the basement steps, and to the freezer, propping the lid, and retrieving the two pies there. Hannah had marked them plainly with

white tape. 'Cherry', and 'Pecan'.

I carried them back up to the kitchen, which was empty now, and set about defrosting them in the microwave, and then cutting slices.

Guthrie ambled in as I was gathering up plates and forks to serve it on.

"Hey, pie!" he said, with enthusiasm.

"They were in the downstairs freezer," I said.

"Great. I want cherry," he said, and began to scoop out a piece onto a smaller plate.

"Guthrie," I spoke up swiftly. "I shouldn't have said that today about you hiding from Kenny. It was mean."

Guthrie met my eyes, pausing in his scooping of pie.

"I guess I was hiding," he admitted. "I was bein' a coward."

"I know it's hard for you," I said.

"It's hard for you, too. I know that. I mean, with your dog and everything else."

"He wasn't the one that shot Warrior, though. He told me. He kicked him. Hard, probably. But he didn't shoot him."

"And you believe him?" Guthrie asked.

"Yeah. I do."

"Well," Guthrie looked considering. "That's good."

We were in silence for a moment or so, and Guthrie popped a cherry from the pie into his mouth "I just don't get Kenny. How he

could get messed up with all of that."

"He says he was drinking too much," I offered. "And that he thought he could help with doctor's bills for his dad."

"Hmm," Guthrie said, and sighed.

For a moment, I felt awkward, wondering what to say to him next. I gave his arm a light punch. "Eat your pie," I told him, and

he gave me a half-grin, diving into the pie with relish.

After he'd gone back to the living room, I finished slicing up the pies, and put a piece of each on two plates. And then I went

to the living room, where everybody was gathered. The radio was playing country songs, and Nancy and Evan were sitting on the

couch, across from Ford, who was sprawled in the recliner, his feet hanging over the side, Isaac sitting on his stomach.

Guthrie was lying on his back on the floor, his arms folded under his head.

I went up and held out a plate to Evan, and one to Ford, both at the same time.

They both took the plates, looking at me questioningly.

"Where'd you get the pie?" Ford asked me. "I thought we didn't have any."

"It was in the downstairs freezer," I said, in explanation. "And, if anybody deserves pie, it's the two of you."

I went on talking, going to sit on the floor, cross-legged beside Guthrie. "Thanks for your help. With the burros."

This was the opening, if they should decide to take it. I thought if they wanted to holler at me for taking off like I had, and

being snarly, and all of that, well, I would accept it. I didn't think that Ford would, since he'd already said something to me earlier.

And, he didn't. He just began eating his pie. I looked towards Evan, waiting, but he didn't jump on me. He just said,

"Thanks. It looks good."

After that, I relaxed, and so did everybody else. I felt better than I had all day. I was eating a healthy snack. Apple slices dipped in

peanut butter. I'd checked my level while I was getting the pie, and everything was in the normal range again. So, I felt better physically.

And also, emotionally. Even though I was sad about the baby burro's death, I still felt more in tune with my brothers. More in sync.

While we all just sitting round, eating, and talking, Daniel got home from town. He went to get himself a piece of cherry pie, and then

sat down to join us. It grew later, and Nancy got around to head home. She said her goodbyes and Evan walked her out to her car.

Daniel and Guthrie headed up to bed, with Daniel taking the sleeping Isaac up to his crib.

I went to the kitchen to do my injection. Ford came in, too, carrying all the pie plates to put them into the sink.

I watched him, out of the corner of my eye, as I put my supplies away. I don't like being on the 'outs' with Ford. Well, in truth, I don't like

it with any of my brothers. And, I know that Ford doesn't like it, either. He hates confrontation.

"I'm gonna head up to bed," he was saying, as he ran water over the dishes.

"Okay," I said, and as he brushed past me, I reached out to touch his arm.

When he paused, looking down at me, I said, quietly, "Thank you. For what you did."

"It's okay, Har," he said. "Just try to wake up on the right side of the bed tomorrow, alright?"

"Yes," I said.

7

It was a bit later, and I was coming out of the bathroom, after brushing my teeth, and washing my face with Noxema. I was headed

to the right, towards my bedroom, when I heard a voice from the other end of the hallway.

"Harlie."

I paused, looking, and saw Evan standing there, at the doorway of his own room.

"Comere," he said, quietly.

I felt a moment of trepidation. I'd thought he was going to let me off, so to speak. I walked down the hallway, towards him. He pulled

his bedroom door shut again, so Ford wouldn't be bothered, I guessed.

I stopped a couple of steps from him.

"I think we need to straighten some stuff out," he began.

"Okay," I said, quietly.

"Why'd you go on out, lookin' for the burro like that? After I said one of us would go with you?"

I hesitated, licking my lips. "I just got irritated. And impatient."

"I said we'd go with you," he reminded me again.

"I know."

"So, why then?" he persisted.

I looked at him, plainly waiting for an answer from me. "Sometimes-" I began, and then stopped.

"Sometimes, what?"

"I was jealous."

"Huh?" he asked, obviously puzzled.

"You guys, all of you today, were all so-guy-some. Like the Brotherhood. I just felt left out."

Instead of telling me it was foolish of me to feel left out, that I didn't need to ever worry about anything such as that, or

otherwise trying to sooth my feelings, Evan was his usual blunt self.

"So you felt left out," he said flatly. "So what?"

I was taking that in, when he plunged onward.

"You can use that as an excuse to do whatever you want? Is that what you think?" he demanded.

"No. I don't think that," I denied.

"Well, you must."

I looked at him, trying to find the right things to say to him. I didn't want him to be mad at me.

"I know you don't like it, Harlie, but sometimes you just have to do what I tell you. No argument. Period," he went on.

"I know. I do listen to you," I said.

"Really?" he said, in a scoffing way. "When?"

I licked my lips again. "When Steven was here that night? And he wanted me to go out with him? Remember? I asked you, and you

said to stay home. "

Evan tilted his head, and said, slowly, "That's it? That's your example?"

"Well, I did listen," I said. "And I'm really glad that I did." I gave him an earnest look. "You were right. I would have been in a

mess if I'd gone with him."

Evan raised an eyebrow, plainly waiting for me to continue.

When I stood there, out of words, he sighed. "Okay. Let's use that example. You say you're glad you listened to me."

"Yeah."

"What about today? You could have gotten bitten by a snake in that grass. Or cut up by tryin' to use that damn machete. Just

because you didn't get hurt, doesn't mean that you couldn't have been."

"I should have listened," I admitted.

"And then you lied about it, sayin' you weren't going, when you had every intention to still go," he went on. "You were bein' a

real brat."

"Just like Reagan," I said.

I'd meant it as a sort of a joke, but Evan didn't look as though he thought it funny. Not at all.

"I'm just joking," I told him.

"Take this seriously, or I'm gonna get mad," he warned.

I gave him a wide-eyed look. "You mean you're not mad now? This feels as though you're mad."

Evan gave me a look, an eight on a scale to ten.

"Sorry," I said. I took a breath, and said, "I was wrong not to listen. I've been in a lousy mood all day, and I took it

out on everybody. I am sorry, Ev."

He sighed, studying me. "Okay."

For a long few moments, I was so, so relieved that it was over, the lecture, I mean, that I just felt wilted with tiredness. And I gave

Evan a tentative smile. He didn't exactly smile back, but he didn't look irritated anymore, either.

"Thank you for helping the burro," I said quietly.

Evan shrugged. "I didn't do much."

"You did," I argued. "You did a lot to help."

"Don't go out tonight in the dark to check on her," he warned me.

I held up three fingers. "Girl Scout's Honor," I said.

"Don't go alone in the mornin', either. I'll go with you."

"Okay. Thanks."

"Alright. Get to bed," he said, and turned towards his own doorway.

"Ev, wait," I said, and he paused, his hand on the doorknob.

"What?"

I hesitated, and then, I gave him a hug, wrapping my arms around his waist. After a couple of seconds, he hugged

me back. We stood that way for a few minutes, neither one of us saying anything.

When we separated, and I was almost to my own bedroom door, I looked back down the hall, to see him standing there,

watching me.

"You're a good brother, Ev," I said. "I don't tell you enough, but you really are."

"Thanks," he said.

"See you in the morning," I said.

"Yep. Goodnight."

7