Amusement

Shanks had not been expecting to be tracked down by Hawk-Eyes while hanging out on Yukiryu Island; he hadn't seen the swordsman since he brought Luffy's bounty to Shanks' attention, though he knew the Shichibukai had to have been at Marineford. That Mihawk was coming to him with a request was also completely out of character: Generally it was Shanks who asked repeatedly and Hawk-Eyes who eventually grudgingly conceded.

"So what is it?" the Yonko asked, setting his sake aside.

The World's Strongest Swordsman shifted. "It concerns my daughter," he admitted.

"Eyas? Is she alright?" Shanks had been privately concerned for her since learning more about her past and her vanishing from the Red Force with Ace after the funeral hadn't done anything to allay that worry. Never mind that she would be more than half-way through her pregnancy right now.

"Currently yes," Mihawk said shortly, "however Kaido has stepped up his attempts against her and certain Marines have tried to make her lose the child."

"What." He wasn't the only person looking ready to kill; all of his officers seemed ready to set out right now and rain death and destruction on those responsible.

"Lisska assures me there was no serious harm done and those responsible are being court-martialled as per her request, as is her due as a Pose Artificer with a Government contract," Hawk-Eyes went on sourly, "and Spinoza Island is now lacking both a Marine Base and a Commodore due to Spadille taking vengeance on her behalf. Kaido is also down over eight hundred men."

"Spadille?" Shanks asked, puzzled.

Mihawk raised an eyebrow. "Fire-Fist's new identity. Lisska persuaded me to take him under my wing until he is capable enough to manage on his own."

"You have minions now?" Hawk-Eyes didn't really have a ship, so he couldn't have crew. "I knew you'd lighten up eventually, you old recluse!"

"He is technically my daughter's bodyguard."

"And probably her lover," Shanks pointed out with no small amount of glee; he'd noticed how the resurrected pirate watched Eyas when he didn't realise other people were looking and knew her well enough to bet she would notice soon and take action, never mind that she already had one lover.

Mihawk's eyebrow twitched. Ooh, definitely Eyas' lover then. "So Kaido went after her again?" Shanks asked, drawing the conversation back to the original subject.

"Lisska is less able to conceal and defend herself while pregnant and the incident with the Marines means I no longer feel she can travel safely," Mihawk said tightly, "however I cannot take her back to Kuraigana. Is there an Island within your territory she can be safely hidden on?"

Shanks frowned, thinking seriously on the matter. Eyas couldn't stay on an uninhabited island in her current condition and he didn't want to risk her on one of the peripheral ones where Big Mom, Kaido or even Blackbeard might make a play for her. Considering the Supernovas –who were making a name for themselves as the 'Worst Generation'– were trying to hack their way into prominence it was safer to keep her well off the beaten track altogether. Which left…

"Redrock Reef," he said aloud. Beckman nodded appreciatively.

"Which is?" Hawk-Eyes inquired.

"It's way, way off the main routes right in the middle of my territory; I didn't even know it was there until Eyas found it," Shanks admitted sheepishly. "The Log Pose doesn't so much as twitch near it despite the impressive iron deposits. It's an autumn island surrounded by six miles of reef on all sides: to actually reach land you have to either take a longboat or swim and the currents over the reefs are pretty nasty. I've got a detailed map of it somewhere –Eyas made it for me– and it's inhabited now, but you can't even find it unless you know where it is and then you can't land without knowing exactly where all the reefs are and even that's a challenge. Eyas gave us a lift in Swift Hunter when we made landfall the first time after we sank three boats trying to get close." Redrock Reef was without a doubt the most challenging island to actually land on he'd ever come across on the Grand Line. Ironically, other than the proliferation of incredibly poisonous frogs and butterflies, the actual island was perfectly suited to human habitation.

"Who lives there?"

Shanks grinned. "Spitfire asked me nicely so I let her settle some of the human sea-kin there: the ones who just want a quiet life. There're probably mermaids living in the reefs now considering what happened at Marineford, but on my last visit there were three villages on the island and a steady trade through the Sea Network. So it's isolated, inhabited, secret and not at all primitive. Perfect for squirreling you trouble-prone and pregnant daughter on." The pirate paused. "How're adapting to impending grandparenthood, incidentally? Any grey hairs yet?"

A vein throbbed in Hawk-Eyes' temple; he'd hit a nerve. Mihawk was fun to tease even if you needed to be really on the ball to spot the signs. "She is far less trouble than you are despite her pregnancy," the swordsman said dryly, "going by Benn Beckmann's appearance." Beckman had gone completely grey during the past five years.

Shanks pouted. "That's an unfair comparison."

"Benn is only a few years older than I am," Mihawk countered blandly. Shanks paused; was Hawk-Eyes teasing him?

"Hey, it has affected you! You've mellowed!" the Yonko said gleefully. "If I'd known grandkids were what it took I'd have done something about it earlier!"

Hawk-Eyes scowled thunderously. "At least I know about and actually take care of my offspring," he said sharply, "which is more than you can say."

Shanks stiffened. "I don't have any kids, you know that."

Mihawk raised an eyebrow. "Oh? Are you sure?"

Shanks was about to retort when he realised that no, he wasn't sure. He'd never exactly gone back and checked every last village he'd ever partied in. He suddenly felt panic creeping up on him as he remembered that mermaids weren't all that forthcoming to the fathers of their children and there had been several pretty mermaids among his conquests.

"Do you know something I don't?" the Yonko asked cautiously. Mihawk simply folded his arms and gave the redhead a look. "C'mon Hawk-Eyes! This isn't funny!"

"I do not know anything about any potential offspring of yours," the swordsman conceded, "but I have eyes and certain suspicions."

Shanks let his head drop into his hands and groaned. That was almost evidence in and of itself. "Oh God help me."

"If you are actually interested in facts and details I suggest you contact the women in question," Mihawk went on blandly, "as should your crew. I doubt you are the only one to have celebrated your successes with female company over the years."

The sudden chorus of chokes and splutters that erupted around him let the Yonko know that at least his men were sharing in his misery.

"I didn't think I was the only one," Beckman said calmly. Shanks' head shot up.

"What! You knew?!"

The grey-haired first mate smiled. "I actually paid attention to what Pearl was talking about when she first came on board, captain," he said pleasantly. "Who did you think I've been corresponding with for all these years?"

Shanks gaped like a landed fish. "You-you-you!"

Beckman chuckled. "I may not have been able to raise my kids but I do know who they are and they know I care even if I can't be there. One of them is twenty and a dancer at the Mermaid Café."

Shanks choked on air, then took a large swig of sake to steady his nerves. "Have we seen her there?"

The sly smirk on his first mate's face was not reassuring. "Her name is Seira."

Shanks desperately tried to remember his last trip to Fishman. He'd drunk a lot, of course, and they'd been to the Mermaid Café. He just about remembered flirting with all of the dancers and waitresses, most of whom had flirted back. Names, names…

"Long brown hair, Striped Blue Angelfish tail?" Beckman prompted with a gleam in his eye.

Urk. Shanks remembered now. At least he hadn't managed to persuade her to leave with him.

"You do remember then," his first mate said. "I felt since Hawk-Eyes hasn't killed you yet for flirting with his daughter I couldn't really make a fuss. Besides, she didn't mind." He smirked again. "Says you're too old for her though."

Shanks groaned.

"Considering how frequently the Whitebeard Pirates visited Fishman, you should be more concerned about the parentage of the ladies who were amenable to your attentions," Hawk-Eyes added dryly, humour glinting in his eyes.

"This is payback, isn't it?" Shanks said glumly, staring into his now-empty mug and feeling altogether far too sober.

"I am merely pointing out that I may not be the only person with a grandchild," the swordsman said dryly. "You have sailing the Grand Line longer than I, after all."

Oh. Oh. Oh.

Shanks did the only thing he could in the face of such a terrifying and disturbing idea: he blacked out.

Mihawk gets his own back.