Of Wyverns and Brands
Chapter 18
I woke to very loud snoring coming from less than five feet away. Straw was everywhere from where Boyd had tossed and turned in the night. What I wouldn't give to be in my own dorm room alone. With a bed. And heating. Straw is not very comfortable to lay on, and it's cold. I'm glad I chose to sleep inside, though, because there's a light mist falling outside right now.
Oscar is already serving breakfast as I walk downstairs. The merchants are giving hearty compliments to the chef on what they called 'the best food on Tellius'. I thought I lived a frugal life before, but compared to this, I was in the life of luxury, apparently.
So now, I have to pick my poison. Sit with the crowed merchants next to Anna, sit with Shinon and Gatrie, or sit with Ike and Soren. Anna's a no, and I love you Ike, but I'm not sitting near Soren. Shinon it is, I guess.
"So the half-beast wants to associate with us?" Shinon remarks. "What's the matter? Can't make friends with your own kind over there? Or is your homeland making you bold?" …Well, that got around quickly, I guess. Soren shoots a glare at us, but Ike draws his attention away. Thank you, Ike.
"You have the better comebacks," I respond, used to it somewhat. Shinon is simply annoying, while things with Soren are feeling a bit awkward after yesterday's fight.
"Hey, Shinon, check it out," Gatrie says, elbowing him to get his attention. "I think that girl over there is interested in me. She winked at me and everything."
I glance over and say a very mischievous looking Anna. I barely keep my laughter within as I turn back to my food. Ah, Gatrie.
"Think I got a chance?"
"As long as you've got a wallet," Shinon says, getting back to his food.
I had almost finished my food, when Boyd suddenly stumbles into the main area, clothes halfway on. Literally. "Bad news!" he shouts, popping his head out his shirt. "Soldiers! Daein ones!"
Shoot! I was so focused on saving Greil, I forgot this happened right afterward.
Shinon swore and rose from the makeshift table. "Those blasted fools don't know when to quit."
"But why follow us this far into Gallia?" Ike asks, even as the rest of the mercenaries came downstairs. "There's no chance of them escaping any patrols."
"I don't think they're planning on leaving alive," Soren points out.
"What's the plan, Commander?" Gatrie asks, the rest of the conversations ceasing as all eyes turn to Greil.
"I think it's time we gave our visitors a welcoming. Everyone, grab your gear and meet back down here. We have a few minutes before they'll get here." At Greil's words, everyone began to move. "Soren. Do you have a good sense of the fort's layout?"
Soren nods, but I miss the rest of it as I quickly go to retrieve my sword. Wanting to check on Midnight, I head to the roof. She's still there, though quite alert, as though expecting a fight.
"Get ready, girl," I whisper as I get her saddle on. The misting rain still hasn't stopped, and a low fog has now formed, but hopefully that will blind their archers and not hamper her flight. Hopefully. This will be our first time flying in the rain, so…
Back downstairs, the mercenaries are gathered and waiting for Soren to fully form a plan.
"What about us?" Muston asks.
"We agreed to protect you, so you'll stay on the second floor unless plans change," Greil orders. "We should be able to repel the attackers, but be ready to fight, in any case."
"Oh, don't worry," Anna says with a smirk. "Prices aren't the only thing we cut. They just better not have touched my goods, or they'll be sorry. Even split on the loot?" Greil raises an eyebrow at her question, and Anna shrugs. "Can't leave good weapons and armor behind, right?" She's a complete munchkin! I'm having DnD flashbacks now.
"She's a keeper," Shinon comments to Gatrie. "Definitely a keeper."
"Drake, you'll be staying back as well," Greil says, turning to me. I'm getting benched again! No! "I want you as a last resort. If things start to go bad, I want you to take Mist and Rolf and get out of here." I…don't actually know if Midnight can carry all three of us, let alone allow Rolf approach her.
"What? No!" Mist exclaims. "I won't leave you guys again!"
"Mist, that's an order. We'll hold them off as best we can, but…they're carrying a legion banner with them." Legion flag? I think I heard of that term back in the Daein army, but I can't recall.
Shinon swore again, even as everyone else goes silent.
"What does that mean?" Ike asks.
"A Daein Legion consists of a hundred men," Shinon explains. "We're outnumbered ten to one." Oh yeah. That's what it means…a hundred men!? Calm down, Drake. This fight can be won in the game, and we have three extra fighters to mow them down. We can still do this.
"Come on, that's nothing for us, right? Is that all they got?" Boyd says, trying and failing to lighten the mood. Maybe if your voice didn't wobble as you said it, Boyd.
"Well, I'm ready to go!" Mia says, perhaps the only one still pepped up.
"Okay, then I've got positions for all of you then," Soren says. He quickly goes down the list of detailing where each person was to be. He really knows each and every spot of the area around the fort. No wonder he's the tactician.
But of course, I'm not fighting. Which is once again leaving me divided. Risk my life and possibly kill others, or stay inside and wish I was helping. I need to stop thinking of this as a game. Besides, I may not even know what's going to happen next now that the story's changed.
…Please, please, please, don't let the Black Knight show up here. Pretty, pretty please. I'm going to have to look for him around every corner now, aren't I?
"If I might add something?" Daniel…or Jorge…the blonde merchant says as the meeting ends. "We had another member of our caravan that got separated from us. She's a young girl with light purple hair. There's a chance that they may have taken her." Or lured her with food.
Greil nods. "We'll keep an eye out for her."
And now they're heading outside to fight even as the merchants go upstairs to their rooms. Shinon heads upstairs as well to snipe from the windows. This battle has to be easy with the three of them, right? This is Greil we're talking about.
I'm still feeling anxious, even as Rolf and Mist start to dig into the supplies. What are they…? "Um, Rolf?"
Rolf and Mist freeze, apparently having forgotten about me standing right here this whole time. In Rolf's hand is a small recurve bow, which I'm guessing is his 'Rolf's Bow'.
"What are you doing?" I ask. They aren't supposed to join up until the next map, so…
Rolf takes a deep breath, then turns around and faces me with a look of determination. "I'm fighting, too! You heard the others. There's too many out there. I need to help!"
More consequences from the divergence of Greil living, I guess. But should I let him? I mean, he won't be in actual close combat, and if I send him up with Shinon, he'll be fine. And it's just one map early. "You better do exactly what Shinon tells you to do."
Rolf looks a little shocked, but it quickly is replaced by excited. "I will!" he exclaims, running off upstairs.
"I am, too." And there's Mist, standing there with a staff in hand. "Rhys taught me how to use a staff, so I'll help as well."
"You're not going out into the middle of that chaos," I immediately say. Greil would kill me if I let her go out there.
"But you let Rolf go up there and fight!" But he's an archer and safe with Shinon. Inside a fort.
"Mist, I already told you, you're too young-" Wrong thing to say. I should have known that was definitely the wrong thing to say.
"Rolf is three years younger than me! You just don't think I'm able, don't you? You just let Rolf because he's a boy, didn't you?" Well, no. Both of you were going to join next chapter and…and…
Oh. I think I'm going to be sick. I just sent a twelve year old to kill people without a second thought. All because he was a character in some game back on Earth. And after all I had just gone through myself…and…
"Drake?" Mist whispers, concern suddenly replacing her previous anger.
I sit down on the makeshift bench and stare at my hands, which are now trembling. Great. I'm having a breakdown. In the middle of a fight.
"Drake? What's wrong? You've gone as pale as Rhys."
"I'm just having a blue screen moment," I mumble.
Mist only looks confused. Of course she would. A real world reference in this fake, game world. A world with no real values when it comes to killing and war. When men kill at the drop of a hat and children end up fighting.
And I'm accepting it. Me, who would have been outraged at all this a few months ago. Who would have gotten the whole area up in arms if war was started without reason or if children were allowed to fight. Who thought killing was evil and detestable.
But I'm promoting it now. All because it happened in some game. All because it was 'going to happen anyway'.
What's wrong with me?
"Drake?"
"You're not going out there, Mist," I state, steel entering my voice as I finally start to gain control of myself again. "I shouldn't have sent Rolf to go snipe with Shinon. Killing's not something someone that young should have to deal with.
"And I can't let you go out there where anyone can attack you. I'm supposed to be the last resort in case everything goes wrong, and you have to be close by if we need to leave quickly. We'll just have to wait and see if any come back in wounded, and then you can help."
"Okay." Mist's voice barely reaches my ears, it's so low. Get ahold of yourself, Drake. You'll end up spreading panic and lowering morale.
"I'm sorry, Mist. It's just that you don't understand what it's like to have to take someone's life."
Mist nods and sits down, her earlier vigor gone. Yep, I made her depressed.
A clank of metal catches my attention, and I look up to see…a soldier? Yes. There's a Daein soldier there, and…
THEY'RE CLIMBING IN THE WINDOWS! THIS WAS NOT IN THE GAME!
Two windows against the back wall of the interior now stand out as quite obvious spots to come in at. Why did you not think of this, Soren?
Stop thinking and fight, Drake!
I jump up and yank out my sword, even as a second soldier starts to come in. With a yell, I charge straight at the first one. The soldier attempts a straight jab with his lance, but I manage to move to side so that it grazes off my armor. Distance closed, the soldier is unable to ward off my sword as I chop into his neck.
Bile rises in my throat as the blood sprays out. I just did it again. Here I am freaking out about how I'm killing others, only to jump up and immediately begin again. What do I do? If I stop, I die. If I keep going-
Emotions charged and thoughts completely scrambled, I let out another scream, this one of frustration, and wildly swing my sword at the next man, who is caught off guard by the vicious attack. My sword goes right through his lance and bounces off the stone floor. If it wasn't for the death grip I had on my weapon, I'm sure it would have flown from my hands as it vibrates wildly. Not stopping, though, I stab the man in the stomach, the armor giving way easily.
Jerking my sword out, I take a quick step to reach the window and chop the man's left hand right off. The man screams and falls back out onto the ground. Who…has no weapon…and didn't even have armor on…
I really am going to be sick.
A scream jerks me around, and I see Mist on the ground, a sword wielding soldier about to strike her. And so I do the first stupid thing that comes to mind: I throw my sword at the man ten feet away.
The man jumps as the sword clatters to the ground a few feet to his right, but begins to laugh when I sees me now unarmed. I'm so stupid.
So I charge him. Weaponless. The guy is caught off-guard for a moment, but manages to bring his sword up in time to chop down into my shoulder as I grab ahold of him.
Pain. Pain. That hurts. A lot. The sword had glanced off my helmet and dug into my left shoulder, right through the armor. And it hurts. Bad. But some crazy part of me has a tight hold on the man's arms now and won't let go.
The man is grinning at me, until he notices that I'm still firmly holding him there. I'm not giving up yet. Letting go with my right hand, I jab him as hard as I can right into his Adam's apple.
I choke on a scream as the sword is suddenly jerked from my shoulder and the pain flares. My vision goes white from the intense pain, and before I know it, I'm on the ground curled up, as though trying to shield myself from it.
This is the end. I'm wide open should that guy attack, but I can't do anything. I can barely even see as I bite my lip to keep from crying out.
After what feels like an eternity, I feel the pain begin to fade as a warmth spreads around the wound. Shakily looking up, I see Mist using a staff with trembling hands, her face white.
"It'll be okay. It'll be okay," Mist keeps muttering, focusing on my shoulder.
I look around for the soldier and see him on the ground in a pool of blood, my sword stuck in his throat from where he was halfway decapitated. Other than the dead soldiers, it's still just Mist and me, which means…
"Mist."
Mist finishes healing me and stops her mantra. "Y-yes?" She's starting to panic.
I force myself up, most of the pain gone. "What-" No. Not a good question to ask. She's really starting to panic now. I grab her by the arms. "Listen, Mist. I need your help." We really don't have time to panic about stuff.
She nods, calming a little as I distract her from the scene around us.
"We need to block the windows before more men come. Help me make a barricade real quick." Fortify. Defense. That comes first.
With Mist's help, we take apart the makeshift tables from breakfast and move the boards and stones against the two windows, blocking them completely. Not perfect, but hopefully enough for the moment. My shoulder is still stiff as we work, but at least the pain's gone. Even thinking about it makes me shiver.
Boyd limps in as we finish, Ilyana supporting him. They stop and stare at the dead bodies around the room.
"What happened in here?" Boyd asks.
"Windows," I explain quickly.
Mist rushes over to him, obviously relieved to have something to do.
"Wait, why does Mist have a staff, and-"
"Shut up, Boyd." Mist's voice is so firm, Boyd immediately shuts his mouth with a look of surprise.
"What's the situation out there?" I ask.
"We're keeping them back, but Rhys is starting to get spread thin with all of us, so Soren wants us to start rotating spots as we fall back. Says we won't last if we use up all our energy now. This is our new recruit. Got sent back to rest, since she looks pretty sick."
"I'm just hungry," Ilyana murmurs, looking as though she were in pain.
"Wow, you're good," Boyd comments as Mist finishes up. "I didn't think you would even know which end of the staff to use."
Mist doesn't reply as she just leaves and sits against the wall, looking depressed. This isn't good.
Boyd looks from her to me at a loss for words. "Hey, you know I was just joking, right, Mist?" Boyd asks nervously, going to console her. "Come on. I didn't mean it, honest."
The rest of the battle seemed to drag on. Mist stayed unresponsive most of the time, only moving to help tend to the small wounds the others brought back. Even as the mercenaries kept falling back, though, the numbers quickly dwindled until they finished the last of them off without Lethe and Mordecai even having to help. Apparently, not one soldier ran.
Mist retreated to her room, and I soon did the same, already knowing what news the two laguz would bring. I was mentally exhausted after that harrowing fight, but sleep wouldn't come easily as my mind continually replayed the events of the fight. It was at least a few hours before I finally manage to drift off to sleep.
-o-
I see a soldier running by me. He has white armor on. Instinctively, I stab him in the gut.
The man looks terrified for a second, and I suddenly recognize him as the first man I killed. But then looks at me angrily, even as his white armor changes to black and his face warps into the riverside commander's.
"Traitor!" he calls, pulling out a sword.
I try to jerk my sword out and back up, but my sword won't budge as the man grabs it with his free hand. His face changes once more, and I'm suddenly faced by the swordsman from the battle earlier.
"Time to die!" the man yells, his sword coming down to chop into my shoulder.
I sit up with a gasp. The room is pitch black, yet I can still see those three faces before me. Hovering, haunting, accusing. Sweats runs down my face as I slowly realize it was a nightmare. Just a nightmare.
Yeah, right. They're here. The people you've killed. The people you murdered, Drake. They're crying out for your blood, murderer.
I need air. Now. I shakily get up and stumble out of the room, the central area thankfully lit somewhat by the moon. Still nauseated and confused, I make my way slowly downstairs. Outside. I just need to be outside.
I take a few steps outside and sigh as the cool air hits my skin. It's the middle of the night now. The rain from earlier is gone, the night sky now clear.
"Can't sleep either?"
I jump at the random voice. Titania is actually rather close by, sitting on the ground. Mist is curled up in her arms, looking like only a little girl right now. It looks as though she cried herself to sleep from her red eyes and light breathing.
Because of me. Because I couldn't fight them off. Because I didn't take her upstairs. Because I-
"Stop."
What?
"Come here." Confused, I sit down next to her on the wet ground. "You're blaming yourself, aren't you?"
"I…"
"You're pretty easy to read, you know," Titania comments.
"Really?"
"You have an open, honest face, Drake. That's one of the reasons I was willing to give you a chance when we first met. You may be a little older, but you're still young at heart. You haven't had to face many of the harsh realities of the world until now, have you?"
Those harsh realities didn't exist until a few months ago. War only ever entered my mind when I was playing games. I know we're fighting wars in the far east, but that never really registered with me. I was never a soldier, nor planning to be.
"Drake, look at this girl," Titania orders, gently brushing through Mist's hair. Yeah, Mist had definitely cried herself to sleep. "You saved this girl today."
More like exposed her to the cruelest world I've ever been in.
"Thank you, Drake."
Is she…starting to cry?
Titania wipes her eyes and continues, her voice growing stronger again. "I don't know what we would have done if she had gotten hurt. She's like a daughter to me. And you risked your life to safe her. Thank you."
My immediate response is to deny it, but…I can't. Not with the amount of emotion and sincerity Titania is putting into her words. She really means it. But…I ended up forcing Mist to kill. I sent Rolf to go kill people! Can that really be alright? It can't. It just can't be.
"I hate this world. All anybody wants to do is to kill and hurt and destroy, and nobody cares. Nobody thinks twice about murdering others or using others at all here," I quietly rant as I stare at the ground, not knowing who I'm even talking to anymore.
"Is that how you really feel?" Titania asks. When I don't respond, she continues, "Drake, this isn't how it always is, or how it even should be. Before Daein invaded Crimea, we had peace for a long time. I know this place must seem like it's horrible, but there are still plenty of good people out there. Not everyone wants to kill others. Most of them are only soldiers, even, fighting for their country."
"And you don't think it's wrong? Murder is murder," I state firmly, my mind suddenly going back to my last conversation with Daren.
"It is. I'll tell you like my instructor told me. We each have to make an important choice. What do we fight for? If we fight for ourselves, we'll either become madmen or breakdown when we finally do kill. So we fight for others instead. We fight, so others don't have to. We fight, because if we don't, then every person we were protecting will then have to face our enemies. Unless we want our families and kindred to face we see on the battlefield, we stand firm. We stand to protect."
What am I fighting for, then? I'm not from Tellius. I no longer have a country to protect. The last of my family is on a different world, and I don't have a home to return to. What's the point of me fighting, then? I had fought at first because I was forced to. Then I joined the mercenaries and became part of the game. But this was no game. This was reality, my reality now. I can't…I can't treat this like a game anymore.
I…want to fight for the mercenaries. I…want to find a place to belong. I want to have something to protect as well. "But didn't Rolf and Mist have to face those things today? How did we protect them?"
"They're stronger than they look, Drake. And they already knew what they wanted to do. They want to protect us," Titania explains with a small smile. "One day, we might not be around to protect them, but as long as we're together, we'll support each other to the end. That's what a family does."
A family. Tears fill my eyes as the sudden desire to see my mom emerges. We weren't the closest, but she was still the last family member I had. And now I may never see her again.
Titania's arm pulled me to her side even as I began to cry. It wasn't fair. I was dragged from my home, from my family, from my life, and I was dumped here without an explanation, without a choice. This just wasn't fair.
Titania didn't say anything as I cry on and on, simply holding me tight. It reminds me of how my mom used to comfort me, and my crying only grew. Nothing was fair here.
-o-
AN: Ah! An emotional explosive chapter! Which might be because I'm going through a lot of drama right now! Really, though, I hope I managed to get it across right without crashing and burning as I know so many books have done in attempting stuff like this.
I…don't know what else I'm supposed to put in these author's notes, so, enjoy this chapter, and I hope to hear from you all soon.
9/5/17: Retconning Mist's and Rolf's ages to their correct ages here.
Update: Grammar corrections, etc.