Chapter 4: Dreams of Death

After my confrontation with Hollystar, I decided to just go back to the place that I like to call home. Even though it might be cool to live in a place where all you have to do is get prey and fight off intruders, but I actually like my life as it is. Plus, Joann wouldn't be able to come with me. She'd be scared out of her mind. Just the thought of harming another cat makes her want to puke her guts out. Honestly, I wonder why she's bothered to stay here. The ground is littered with bones and dried blood of all the cats I've killed. Maybe some prey that angered me too, but besides that. I bet every time she walks outside, she vomits before trying to find prey or food from the twoleg's metal cans that stored food that they didn't eat.

Besides, I don't necessarily like the forest. Not after my incident. Especially not after that. I think every time I see the forest I almost vomit.

"So, Cat. What are you going to do now?" Joann's voice surprised me.

I glanced back at her. I guess I never really described her, did I. Well, she has black fur, like me. The only difference, is that her paws are white, along with her tail-tip. Her eyes are blue, like the sky. Usually she looks like the most innocent creature in the world. Right now, though, she looks like she's guilty of every crime ever committed.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

She came and sat next to me by the river. She took the mouse I was currently eating and gobbled it down it a few quick bites. I glared at her, but I wasn't mad. I was never mad at Joann.

"I mean, are you going to ShadowClan? Or will you stay here?" She gazed at me, her eyes sparkling like a kit's.

"How do you know about that?"

"I was there." She mewed simply, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world, "I watched you leave, though I couldn't hear what you were saying."

"Then how do you know if what we were talking about was ShadowClan?" I almost growled at her. Almost. And I never growled at Joann. I know how much I scare her. I know how hard it must be for her to talk to me right now.

"I know about the Clans, Cat. I know what the cats in each Clan look like. I know their names. I have as many resources as you do. I just don't kill them when they don't do what I ask them."

My eyes narrowed. I guess I didn't know my sister after all. If she had resources, then she was a lot better at dealing with blood and death than I thought. If only she had told me sooner. Then maybe I could have gotten better at talking to her. Maybe we actually could've been friends.

"I honestly don't know if I'm going to be a part of ShadowClan." I sighed, "I don't know if I'll belong there."

"You will, Cat." Joann mewed softly, "We will." At my confused glance, she continued, "I'm coming with you."

"But, don't you...not like blood and stuff like that?" I had to ask.

Joann laughed softly, "I don't like it, but I can deal with it." She leaned on me, and sighed, "After all, I've put up with you for a while now. All because I love you, brother."

She yawned, and curled up into a ball, and quickly fell asleep. I lay down and fell asleep as well, falling prey to the darkness called my mind.

.

.

The moon was out, pine trees surrounding me. Cats yowled in the distance, a battle most likely.

"Cat, are you ready?" I turned around to see a bright ginger she-cat with white stripes and green eyes at the edge of the forest.

"Ready for what, Miss?" I mewed, without really thinking. And, Miss? Who was that?

Miss walked over to me and flicked my ears with her tail, "The Shade Trial, obviously, what else would you have to be ready for?!"

I tilted my head in confusion. What was a trial? Why was I here?

Miss walked over to me and glared, "You know, the thing where we decide whether or not you get to be a warrior of the wolves? The life altering thing you've been training for in the last 6 moons? How can you be so idiotic!"

Suddenly pain clawed at my stomach. Miss' claw were stained with blood, and I saw the liquid dripping from right above my belly. I was as confused as ever.

"If you can't remember something as simple as the trial, then you don't deserve to live." Miss glared at me and scratched my eyes. Then she left me, bloody and dying.

To be honest, it wasn't that bad. My memory was slipping from me, I could barely remember what my name was. I couldn't remember the things all the cats had called me, or even that I had a sister named Joann. I didn't remember all the lives I had taken just because of anger. It was wonderful. The pain from my stomach and eyes slowly faded away, and the yowls went quiet. It was so peaceful. It was so quiet. To die. It's a beautiful thing. A truly beautiful thing. No pain, no suffering. No nothing. To bad it's just a dream.

.

.

I gasped, struggled to breathe, and fell into the river that me and Joann fell asleep next to. The splash woke Joann, who also gasped, struggled to breathe, and fell into the river.

She looked at me, her eyes looked like she was just thankful to be alive. To be honest, my eyes probably reflected hers. A dream about dying isn't something you would really want to wake up to.

"What is the Shade Trial?" Joann asked after what seemed like forever, "What's a warrior of the wolves?"

"We had the same dream..." I realized. Weird. Really weird. I glanced at Joann, "Still think we should go to ShadowClan?"

Joann sighed, "I...I don't know. Right now, though, we should probably find someone who knows about dreams." She smiled, "And I know just the cat."

She jumped up and shook herself free of water. Then she ran down the path, leaving me behind.

At that moment, I thought I was going to be just fine. Joann was going to find a cat to solve all our problems. If she had good sources of information, then I trusted her.

How wrong I was.

Hope you liked this chapter! Thank you all for the good reviews, it makes a demon smile!

For all wondering, if you still haven't got it, Cat is a tom. Not a she.

Thanks again.

- Moon