Kirk missed the hold he was trying to set, which put him
in no position to counter Spock's throw. He hit the mat,
rolled, and lay still.
"Captain?"
"I'm alright, Spock." Kirk said, and sat up. "Sorry. I
wasn't concentrating."
Spock relaxed from the neutral position he had assumed,
and offered Kirk his hand. Surprised, Kirk took it, and
was pulled effortlessly to his feet.
"Something is troubling you, Jim." Spock said.
Kirk snorted. "Practicing those acute observational skills
again, I see." He rolled his neck to ease the tension there.
"The paperwork *is* getting on top of me." he admitted.
"I never realised how much I depended on Rand.
Yeoman Jones is working hard, but it'll take a long time
before he's up to Rand's standards."
"Indeed, Ms Rand is extremely competent." Spock said.
"I estimate the chances of her succeeding at the
examinations at over 98 percent."
"She'll be leaving the Enterprise before too long." Kirk
said, and sighed. "I've been lucky to keep her this long."
Honesty made him add: "Lucky, and negligent, too."
"How so, Captain?"
"I should have pushed her harder, sooner. I should have
rotated her through more positions, and I should have
made sure her career was on track. I didn't do any of those
things, Spock, half because I depended on her, and half
because I didn't take the possibility of her *having* a
career as seriously as I should have."
"Because she is female." Spock said flatly, and Kirk
winced.
"Do you remember what Fat Harry said at the mixer?" he
asked. "Sorry, of course you do. Figure of speech."
"You refer to his remark that Starfleet is 'not ready' for
women?" Spock said.
"Yes. I'm pretty sure *I'm* not ready." Kirk said.
"Jim, has it occurred to you that almost all the crew who
were with the Enterprise when you came aboard are still
here? Sulu, Chekov, Scotty - certainly three officers who
are neither reluctant to pursue their own career goals nor
suffering from any subconscious gender prejudice on your
part. And, of course, Dr McCoy, Harb Tanzer, Mr Iyen,
Mr Mahese - and myself."
"So I stymie all my officers, not just the women?" Kirk
asked, only half-joking. He began to turn away, but Spock
laid a hand on his arm.
"You are a captain people wish to serve, Jim." he said with
uncharacteristic gentleness. "All your officers and crew
have sought to stay with the Enterprise. Ms Rand is not
merely a victim of your actions. She is an adult, and able
to make choices." He paused, studying Kirk. "Your
dislike of paperwork is a legend in the fleet, but I do not
believe that is all that is on your mind. What is it, Jim?"
"Jack Whittaker." The name came out like a curse. "Jack
Whittaker. I can't avoid him, Spock. He's on the bridge
whenever he feels like it, he manages to be eating
whenever I am in whatever mess I choose, he pages me to
complain about crew insubordination if someone doesn't
croak 'ribbit' loudly enough when he yells 'frog' and -"
Kirk stopped. Spock was laughing at him. Not, of course, aloud.
Indeed, the Vulcan had not even allowed a smile to tug at
the corners of his mouth, but Kirk could see the spark of
amusement deep in his friend's eyes. "I'm over-reacting,
aren't I?"
"The cause," Spock assured him gravely, "is sufficient."
They began to walk towards the change-rooms. "I'm half
angry," Kirk went on, "because I want to be at Starbase
18. I *hate* having crew off the ship. And you know as
well as I do, Spock, that even if they have to sit those
stupid tests by themselves there's a lot you can do to
make it easier on them. If you're there. And we're not -
because of Whittaker."
Spock's eyebrow was up. "'Stupid tests', Jim?" he said.
"An unusual opinion for the holder of Starfleet's record
scores."
"How do you think they'll do?" Kirk asked.
"Ms Rand will almost certainly acquit herself well." Spock
said. "Mr N'o, Mr Brand, Ms Shimona - I would be ...
disconcerted ... should any of them fail."
"And Larssen."
Spock paused before answering, taking his uniform from
the locker. "Ms Larssen is not one of nature's scholars."
he said. "Nor, I fear, is she one of nature's examination
candidates."
"Nor one of nature's warriors." Kirk said, remembering the
last time he had seen Corrina Larssen in the gym, being
trounced by Sulu in a combat class.
"Untrue, Jim." Spock said, briefly muffled as he pulled his
shirt over his head. "She acquitted herself well in hand to
hand combat against the Voucheron that had - possessed -
Mr Hoffman. Particularly given that she had the
disadvantage of blindness at the time. She is not - one of
nature's theoreticians. This is not necessarily a
disadvantage on the Enterprise, but I fear it will be so in
an examination situation."
"Will she fail?" Kirk said. "Does she have her hopes
pinned on this?"
"I do not know the answer to either of those questions."
Spock said, sitting down to fasten his boots. For a
moment he was very busy with the laces. "Jim - do you
recall the other events of the mixer?"
"Which ones? Brand falling in the dip three times?"
"I was referring to Commodore Whittaker's remarks
regarding Lieutenant Larssen." Spock said.
"I had almost forgotten." Kirk said. Almost, but not quite,
he admitted to himself.
"I cannot violate Ms Larssen's privacy." Spock said,
looking hard at Jim, as if willing him to hear more in the
words than was said. "But I do urge you to forget those
remarks completely. They have no bearing on Ms
Larssen's current or likely future behaviour."
"Her behaviour off duty is no business of mine, Spock."
Kirk said, stuffing his workout gear in the 'fresher chute.
"I try not to listen to gossip."
"Indeed? I had understood that listening to 'gossip' was
one of the tenets of your command style."
"Alright, I have to know what's going the rounds of the
ship's scuttlebutt." Kirk said. "I listen, but I don't
necessarily believe."
"Regardless of your belief or lack thereof in the veracity of
Commodore Whittaker's remarks," Spock said, closing his
locker and turning to face Kirk, "such remarks need not
concern you in any consideration of Ms Larssen."
"I heard you the first time, Spock." Kirk said, exasperated.
Spock said nothing further on the subject, and they parted
ways at the turbolift to go to their respective duty
stations.
It nagged at Kirk for the rest of the day, though, Spock's
uncharacteristic insistence, his reference to Larssen's
'privacy'...
"Computer," he said at last. "Search query, field: Vulcan
culture. Specific phrase: 'violation of privacy.'"
"Working." said the computer.