Chapter 21: Warm

Dreams freak me out, okay? I'm uncomfortable when I wake up from one. It seems...unnatural. Whenever I wake up, and I've had a dreams that lasted a day, I can't forget it. Ever. I remember dreams that I've had since before I could talk. It's crazy. Who else remembers every single dream they've had? Definitely unnatural.

"Darkpaw..." Nettlepaw whispered, because once again she had decided to sleep next to me, "I'm sorry for deceiving you earlier. I didn't want to...but Hollystar said so."

I growled and rolled my eyes, "So? I'm trying to sleep." And I planned on ignoring her from then on. I shut my eyes closed and tried to block out everything that mouse-brained hyper she-cat said.

"So it was wrong!" Nettlepaw cried, completely ignoring the fact that I said I was sleeping. Maybe she just doesn't care. Selfish idiot... "I know you wouldn't have killed Blaze. You're too nice for that." My eyes flew open. I blinked. She thought I was...nice? No. No no no no no no no no no no no. You see how many 'no's are there? That's how much I believe she thinks I'm nice. Someone thinking I'm really nice is just plain crazy. Nettlepaw must be crazy.

"I'm trying to sleep." I growled, "Go away."

"How do you do that?" Nettlepaw asked me. Of course, I didn't know what she meant. I wasn't doing anything, "Did you somehow pick up how to speak wolf on your crazy adventures?"

I blinked again. Wolf? That thing that relates to a dog? No...no I did not know how to speak wolf. So what exactly was she talking about? "I have no idea what you're talking about. Of course I can't speak wolf. That's just crazy."

"You're talking crazy again." Nettlepaw mewed quietly, "I don't like wolves. Or dogs. Or foxes. Or badgers. Or ThunderClan. ThunderClan are fox-hearts and mouse-brains." She was frowning. Frowning. I blinked again. With surprise. The happiest cat in the world was frowning. It was the greatest day of my life.

But I still had to sleep. I didn't want anymore drama. Drama was what caused me to start talking wolf. I didn't want to speak wolf. I didn't want to kill anyone else. I didn't want to collapse just to wake up in a strange place with a star covered pool or a cat who wants to kill me or my sister telling me she was waiting for something. I didn't want to see anymore blood. I didn't want to wake up to find someone else attacking ShadowClan. I would kill them, and then I would be in trouble, and I hate getting into trouble. Even if I don't care about anything. I know I'm weird you don't have to shove it right up in my nose.

"I guess you hate me, right?" Nettlepaw asked. Out of the blue. She actually wanted to know if I hated her. Of course, she knew what the answer was. So I ignored her. I obviously hated her. Okay, maybe not so much as hate, but strongly dislike. That sounds much better.

Feeling are hard work. I can't imagine what would happen when I actually liked someone. And be their... strongly known acquaintance. You know what happened the last time I tried to say that other word...it took way too much effort.

"You know," Nettlepaw opened her mouth again. I swear, her sudden bursts were going to kill her one day. And not just by any old cat. I mean by me, "Nightpaw's only known you for two days, but she already feels like you're breaking her shell." Ugggg. NO. I don't want to listen to this. I don't care if you think someone's shell has been broken or whatever. I feel vulnerable just talking to you, Nettlepaw, so please just shut your mouth, "You're really strange." Nettlepaw continued, "You act like this angry snake-heart all the time. I can see right through it. You're just a big softie underneath your reputation."

I raised my head. Her voice was...not as annoying as before...almost comforting. I blinked again. What was this? How could she change her voice? It was softer, smoother...weird. Why would I notice these things? I shouldn't notice these things with all the stuff that's going on in my life. I died today and I was noticing how a voice changed. Someone claw my ears off please. Wait...that won't work. For some reason I feel like I'd still be able to hear with both ears clawed off.

"That surprises you?" Nettlepaw questioned, "Has pretending corrupted your mind? Do you really believe that you're a true demon?"

I looked at her. Her green eyes stared right back into my amber ones. I couldn't see her soul. I was looking straight into her eyes and I couldn't see anything.

Nettlepaw looked away, "Well, even if you are a demon, I don't think it's true. You're just like Hollystar. She acts all tough, but everyone in ShadowClan has seen her bow down to someone. She doesn't think anyone notices, but they all do. And now that you're here, she has a reason to be afraid that you'll overpower her quickly. You're the only cat who's ever matched her strength."

I laughed softly, "I killed her."

"See? Power matched."

I didn't really get how killing Hollystar and fighting her a bunch of times proved me as strong as her. I'm definitely not as strong as her. Fighting wise, yes, but emotionally, probably not. I know you might be thinking: 'What are you talking about, emotionally?', 'You're definitely stronger than Hollystar!' I appreciate the compliment, but you must understand that strength isn't only about fighting. Even I know that. And I'm a psycho killer. It's true, though. Emotional strength is vital. If you can't get your...feelings... under control, then you're as good as dead. Or you'll kill everyone. That's one reason why I don't really express my emotions. So don't accidentally kill everyone I see.

"Are you still awake?" Nettlepaw asked. I mentally groaned. I stayed where I was, my head down on my nest and my eyes closed, "I'll take that as a no." She sighed.

It's funny, really, that I'm still bothering to listen to her. I could've ignored her a while ago. I've had practice with ignoring cats. So why didn't I? Why did I bother to stay awake and listen to Nettlepaw's hyperness? Why did I bother to listen to a cat who I was going to kill? Not that I really wanted to kill her, she would cause her death with her huge gigantic mouth that doesn't know how to shut up.

"I know you're asleep," Great, opening your mouth again. Great, "But...remember when I said you broke Nightpaw's barrier? Yeah, I'm surprised. She tells me everything, but still in that expressionless mode. It's hard to believe that just because you're an insufferable jerk her emotions are coming out again." I decided to ignore the insufferable jerk part, "But...I'm glad she's starting to see things more clearly. It's a relief. She really wanted to be a warrior when she was a kit. But when she killed Spiderpaw...Hollystar made her a medicine cat instead. If Nightpaw wasn't able to love anyone, then maybe Hollystar wouldn't have to exile her. Despite what cats think, Hollystar cares for the cats in her Clan.

"I just rambling aren't I? You're asleep, not listening, and here I am thinking that for some reason you'll hear this." Nettlepaw sighed again, "Goodnight, Darkpaw."

Her breathing gradually slowed. I couldn't help but think about why I was still awake. Seriously. Why? There was no point to it. Nettlepaw sighed once more in her sleep. She rolled closer to me. She was...warm. Well, that was to be expected. One of the most comforting things is another's body heat. The only thing, was that I don't get comforted. Well, at least, until now. The question was why. It didn't make sense. I didn't get comforted by annoying she-cats. I must be crazy.

"Good...night...Nettlepaw..."

Broken of Towering Trees - I shall consider your offer. Terror sounds interesting.

Sooooooo...Darkpaw's warming up to some she-cats eh? *wink*

-Moon