Chapter 29: Red

Okay...so maybe I fibbed a bit. I didn't actually turn into a wolf. You can hate me all you want, but I like it when my stories are interesting. Me turning into a wolf just sounded a lot more interesting. Here's what really happened:

I woke up and saw Fogstep guarding the camp. Another tom was with him, white with ginger patches. As my paws crushed the leaves, they turned and saw me. Most likely, they knew I had come from the apprentices' den, so they didn't attack me right away. But the white and ginger tom bared his teeth with a snarl. Fogstep just kinda...looked like he was asleep with his eyes open.

"Redflame." Fogstep warned, "It's the newbie. Calm your fur down."

Redflame glared at Fogstep, "How could it be? Darkpaw's eyes are red. His eyes are definitely not red."

I just stared at them. Apparently after that weird dream-like vision I gained my true eye color back. Blue and white. Amazing. Welcome to the torment of being different everyone. It's such a wonderful life that makes you want to do anything to destroy the one who thinks you don't give a flying...-okay...I'm okay now. Just need a second to calm down...

All better.

Fogstep walked up to me and looked into my eyes. For a split second, there was a weird tingling in my head. Like a part of me was being sucked out of my body. Then he walked away. As I looked at the tom in confusion, I saw that the amber color in his eyes was a bit deluded. Almost white.

"There, Redflame." Fogstep mewed...proudly? Was that what that emotion was? I think so..."He's all recognizable now."

Redflame stared at me with wonder. He didn't say anything, though. Which made me wonder what Fogstep did. And why he was being kind to me. And the way Redflame acted toward him, anger replaced with a kit-like appreciation. Was Fogstep, the crazy seemingly catnip addict, Redflame's idol? It makes no sense for that to happen. Fogstep was just a mean old snake-heart. At least, that's what Badgerpaw says.

"Go back to sleep, Darkpaw." Fogstep ordered, "You'll need all your strength to go through Hollystar's training and train Badgerpaw. I was planning to do something with him tomorrow, but I guess you'll do a much better job than me."

My eyes widened. Fogstep, the crazy seemingly catnip addict, was...well I don't know what he was doing, but apparently he had known about Badgerpaw's plans. This was weird on so many levels.

"I see you're surprised." Fogstep chuckled, "Well, I train Badgerpaw the way I do for a reason." He explained, "When the little rat was a kit, he was a big bully to the other kits. I doubt he remembers. When Hollystar threatened him for the first time, Badgerpaw-Badgerkit at the time, of course-laughed right in her face, not afraid at all."

Really, the scared out of his mind little tom had been a bully? I didn't believe that for even a heartbeat.

"Hollystar had already decided me for his mentor. His brave attitude and my strength would be a good match. Well, on his first day of training I decided to teach him a very important lesson. I would ignore his training and pretend like he's a worthless rat. Of course, I realized that all bullies are afraid of being bullied themselves. Badgerpaw soon learned that if he didn't do exactly what he was told he would be punished. If he complained he would be punished. If he did anything wrong he would be punished. He's been absolutely afraid of me ever since. Hollystar's threats too.

"I think he's learned his lesson now, though. He hasn't done anything else wrong from what I've heard. I was planning on apologizing tomorrow during a little training session, but since he's already got plans I'll tell him later."

I just stared blankly. It was all so confusing. So very confusing. This crazy freak was telling me that his whole crazy seemingly catnip addict personality was an act? I wasn't about to believe that for a heartbeat. I didn't believe anything he said. I couldn't. But when I looked into his eyes, with my newly found soul searching abilities, I saw he was telling the truth. I saw his sadness as he saw shadows of kits being bullied by the black and white beast. That's what he saw Badgerpaw as. A big ugly beast.

"You have a gift, Darkpaw." Fogstep continued after a moment of silence, "But it's slowly fading." For a second, I saw the badger that had saved me from Bramblestar's little bout of anger, "StarClan help you stop the fire that's about to be unleashed."

I opened my mouth to ask a question, I had so many after that long story. My voice wouldn't work. I couldn't say anything. It was like...something had clogged up my vocal cords. They were being forced to close and I couldn't produce words. Just a gurgle.

Fogstep laughed, "I guess you have a lot of questions. Well..." He glanced at the medicine cat den, "Nightpaw's recent adventures should be able to reveal the answers to you." He glanced at the warriors' den, "I think Blaze could help you too, he was a loner before he came here, not so different from you."

I blinked. I felt myself walking back to the apprentices' den. I didn't know why, I wasn't ordering my legs to move. I was being controlled. It freaked me out. But I just lay next to Nettlepaw, feeling her warmth surround me. It suffocated my sense, dulled my mind. And I was lulled back into sleep again.

The time has come for fate to be undone. Let the nettle's thorns beside you. Let the flaming blaze guide you. Let the night's breeze heal you.

I think about this as I'm running through the forest. ShadowClan's forest. I'm in a section of it I don't recall. I can't find my way out, no matter where I go. I'm going in circles. Endless. Circles.

"Darkpaw!" It's Cloudbreeze. What's she doing here? I don't remember anything. I just remember the running, "Darkpaw stop!"

I see her. I'm in front of her, with my claws unsheathed, and my fur tingling with the familiar sense of a kill. My claws have somehow messed up her whole face. She looks like she's dying. Becoming a corpse by the second. Tears of blood fall from her eyes. I look at my paws. All this blood...I never wanted this. I never wanted to hurt anyone. I just can't stop. I can't stop all this murder and blood and fear. I never wanted anyone to be afraid of me.

"It's okay..." Cloudbreeze whispered, "The night's breeze will heal you." I stared. She smiled, "And you can help heal the night too."

A sudden fire erupted from just under where Cloudbreeze was hunched over. The fire disintegrated her body. I felt the tears. But I couldn't cry. I had stopped crying when I realized that I couldn't help but kill everyone. The fire slowly started spreading through the forest. The crackling sound gave me a headache. A ginormous headache that seemed to spread through my entire body.

Then I heard it, "Follow...Me..." It's the fire talking. It moved quicker and quicker. I...I followed it like an idiot. Who would ever follow fire? Fire was dangerous. Every cat knew that. So why was I following this dangerous cat killer? It didn't make sense.

"I...Will...Guide..." The fire spoke again. It moved closer to me, surrounding me like it had Cloudbreeze. The toxic scent was overwhelming. It burned my fur. I yowled with pain. Tears stained my face, as I slowly died. Black seeped into my vision, slowly turning white. The light of death, I presume. The last thing you see before you join whatever afterlife you believe in. But...after that whiteness faded, all that was left was black. I guess I don't belong anywhere after all.