Chapter 3 Hermione

The ride home was a quiet one. Both of my parents sat on either side of me and kept one arm wrapped around my shoulders at all times. I felt relief that I was going home for a bit, and relief that I was no longer in the arena, but I couldn't shake the fear.

Since I woke up, I'd constantly felt like someone was watching my every move. I felt like I had to hide and burrow down from prying eyes. But the logical side of myself knew everything was fine. I was out of the arena, and I was safe.

The ministry car cloaked itself when we neared Muggle London before dropping us off in our backyard. My parents led me through the back door, still keeping one hand on my shoulders, almost as if I would vanish if they let go of their hold on me.

I looked around the kitchen, surprised to see they had repainted. They'd said something about the possibility of changing the color from the canary yellow, but obviously I'd been more worried about other things.

My mother opened the fridge and rummaged through for a moment before asking me, "Hermione dear, are you hungry? What would you like for dinner? I'll make whatever sounds good to you."

I thought for a moment before shrugging, "I'm not very hungry mum. I'm sorry. I think I'm just going to go ahead and turn in for the night. It's been a long day."

It was barely seven, so it was quite early for bed, but I just didn't know how to tell my parents I wanted to be alone. I'd been alone a lot in the past week, aside from healers in and out of my room, but I just couldn't deal with the looks my parents kept giving me. Their eyes showed their deep sorrow and pity that they couldn't protect me. I knew they blamed themselves, but they could blame nobody.

My father looked at me from his seat at the kitchen table, "Are you sure? It's awfully early for bed."

I nodded and spoke softly, "Yeah, it's just been a really exhausting day."

He gave a reassuring smile with a nod, "Okay sweetheart. We'll make dinner, and the leftovers will be in the fridge if you get hungry. We'll talk more tomorrow."

I nodded softly, before turning for the hall towards my bedroom. I knew they wanted to know how I was doing, but I just couldn't deal with it at the moment. The thought of answering questions made me feel sick to my stomach and caused my head to spin. I couldn't even answer my own questions, let alone someone else's.

As I entered my room, I breathed a sigh of relief as I found it exactly the way I'd left it. I'd always been one who did well with change, but even the slight change of the kitchen from yellow to beige had bothered me deeply.

I sat down on my bed, still entirely numb, and pulled my pillow into my arms. I'm not sure how long I sat like that, just grasping my pillow at staring at the pictures on my bulletin board before I realized the tears falling from my cheeks.

I wanted nothing more than to feel okay again. I wanted to be okay, not just feel it. I wanted the past month wiped from my memory so everything could go back to normal, but at the same time, I wanted to keep some of those moments forever.

As much as I hated the tournament, it had helped me make a friend. It had helped me fall in love. I still couldn't fathom how or why I'd fallen in love with Draco Malfoy, but it had all happened because of the tournament.

And then I felt a pain in my chest. Yes, I loved Draco, but could I really trust him? Not only had he tormented me through school, but he had also killed me. Yes, it was at my request. But would he have done it anyway?

The tears stopped falling finally and I lay in my bed, numb and silent, staring at the ceiling until I fell into a restless sleep.

Author's Note: I wish to apologize to you all for taking so long to update! I had a horrible writer's block, accompanied by a lot happening in life while my boyfriend and I got our first house and found we'll be having our first baby, and starting college again, plus having a horrible work schedule. I'm happy to inform that the writer's block has come to a temporary end, and I look forward to updating while I can! Thank you so much for sticking with me guys, and I look forward to continuing Finding Life while my life experiences persuade and inspire me to continue Dramione's lives! Glad to be back in action! -ZutaraDramione97-