Chapter twenty
Ana looks at the clock on the kitchen wall for the tenth time this morning. It's twelve and she should probably make herself some lunch. It's a lovely Saturday morning, sunny and with crisp early-autumn air, but she's chosen to spend it indoors. She's spent the entire morning trying to get her new project started, but it's turned out to be a drag and she keeps on finding any excuse to procrastinate.
Lunch is important. Christian would certainly agree. Ana smiles and feels a pang of anticipation in her chest. They haven't seen each other for over two weeks and that's the longest they've been apart since they got back together. It's been torture for Ana and she thinks for Christian too. But they have both been so busy, and sine Grace is back in the States and Carrick is still in Sydney to support Mia, Christian has spent almost every evening with his mother.
Ana hasn't felt ready for Christian to stay over yet. But that has to change soon; she can't stand being apart from him this long. She will try to prepare Sara somehow; but Ana's terrified that it might trigger some loyalty-crisis within her daughter. Sara was OK with Ana having a "boy-friend", but as such Christian has so far been a very theoretical since Sara hasn't seen him post to the dinner in Bellevue.
But tonight Ana's going to see him and that's probably why she's so restless. Christian has invited her to be his date to a fundraiser, she doesn't even know for what. The kind of people who will be there aren't her type of crowd, but she couldn't really care less – she just wants to see him. Plus, there is something to be said for Christian being seen with her – Ana wants everyone to know that he's taken.
The best part is that after the fundraiser Christian is coming back with her and they will be able to spend the night together and the day tomorrow, since Sara is spending the weekend with Ray.
At this point her dad knows that she and Christian are together; Sara keeps him informed. And he has said as much about it to Ana as can be expected from someone who expresses very little – that it's "right" that they're together again. Which is no small compliment to Christian.
It's funny actually; Thomas was a very easy-going person, likeable and fairly interesting, and while Ray had nothing against him they never bonded in any way. Whereas Ray and Christian, who is the most private and closed person Ana's ever met, had been quite close in their own way. They had seemed to share an understanding of some kind.
Ana gets eggs from fridge and decides on boiling them, to eat with some ham, cottage cheese and vegetables. She should probably give up on her project for the day and just take a walk after lunch instead, get her thoughts sorted. The book she's trying to write has been marinating in her mind for over a year, but as soon as she decided she'd do something about it – nothing. The idea that was so clear in her mind before, just fleets out of grasp every time she tries to put something down in writing. It might be time she acknowledges that she´s a reader, not a writer.
While eating she shuts down the exasperating word-document and opens her email instead. There's a few work related items but she ignores them; it is Saturday after all. But there's one from Christian.
From: Christian Grey
Subject: Some food for thought
Date: September 3 2014
Anastasia,
I can't tell you how glad I am that you agree to be seen with me in public tonight. I'm longing to show you off. And I'm longing for you. To not see you for two weeks has been very painful (and not the good kind), which brings me to the point of this email.
Attached are just a few ideas to play around with, should you like. If you're up to it we can discuss tonight. Although I'm not sure talking would be a good use of our limited time together this weekend.
I will pick you up at 7 pm like agreed. Don't be late.
I can't wait to see you.
Christian
Ana frowns. What ideas? As always she gets butterflies in her stomach when Christian is being cryptic – a remnant from the time when innuendos were his big thing.
The attachments are real estate listings. Four stunning homes, all in the Seattle area, all with football-pitch sized gardens and two with sea view. They all look beautiful but the houses are far too big for her taste and comfort. The prices are not included in the description, but that doesn't really matter. Christian would never accept her trying to pitch in what she could, which would be comparatively what? A fart in space?
She swallows. This all becomes very real all of a sudden. Looking around her small, but light and airy kitchen she realizes that moving in with Christian, which she does want to do, will mean leaving her lovely house. Her and Sara's lovely house. She tries to picture Christian living here for a nanosecond, but the thought is so ridiculous she snorts loudly.
Pretty soon she's starting to see potential obstacles everywhere she looks, mainly to do with Sara, and she gets up and makes herself some coffee. Coffee, walk, garage, shower, get ready. That will cover the afternoon. It will all be fine, they're just playing around with ideas. Only, she knows she has to be careful tonight; one word in favor of one house over the others and Christian could be ending up buying it tomorrow. She needs to make sure she stays in control of this.
…. …. ….
When Taylor pulls up outside Ana's house she's ready and waiting by the window, like she was going to prom or something. You would think with them just having had a decade long hiatus two weeks would be nothing, but not so; Ana's got a renewed taste for Christian Grey and she's addicted again. Besides – she went without sex for almost two years but now she's feels insatiable; it seems the more she gets, the more she wants.
Christian's gotten out of the car to open her door and he laughs, pleased, when she jogs down the path to get to him faster. Not caring that she's in her dressiest dress and high heels, she jumps into his arms like a little girl, clasping her legs around his waist.
"Oh baby." Christian happily buries his nose in her hair. "I've missed you so much." Setting her down he pulls her hair back and kisses her gently. "You look stunning, Ana."
Judging by the way he's looking her up and down he seems to mean it. She's chosen a dress that snugs her breasts and waist but floats around hips and legs. Almost the same shifting color as her hair the different browns flatter her pale skin and blue eyes. It's also the best dress she owns and Christian's never seen it. It won't match the price tags where she's going but she'll blend in well enough.
Ignoring Taylor's presence completely for once, she makes out like a teenager in the back seat until they're nearly at the venue. She needs the last few minutes before they arrive to try to restore her make-up, while being watched by an amused Christian.
"You don't need it," he says quietly. "You are so beautiful." He grabs her knee and squeezes it, making her hand shake so she gets lipstick on her teeth. She scowls at him, but really she's pleased.
"It's like armor," she says. "It protects me and gives me courage." Christian knows she feels slightly apprehensive about the fundraiser, so he says nothing but still rolls his eyes.
The fundraiser – which is "Clean water is a human right", something Ana obviously supports – is at the Four Seasons. She can't help but marvel at the contradiction – to raise money for poorly developed areas in the world to get clean water, while this event must cost a fortune. The huge ballroom is beautifully decorated, everywhere she looks there are waiters carrying trays filled with champagne flutes or gourmet hors d'oeuvres. And everywhere are beautiful people, expensive-looking and perfectly groomed from top to bottom.
Suddenly she panics – her nails! Did she scrub them while she was in the shower? She spends so much time on her projects in the garage that her nails get black, and it wouldn't be the first time she forgets to use the scrubber. A quick glance down at her hands and she's calmer; nails are clean. Next she glances at Christian; he's looking back at her, smiling warmly. He is among the elite of gorgeousness in this room, and he has more in common both looks-wise and financially with everyone else here than with her. Still, there is no doubt in her mind or heart that it's with her he wants to be and that makes her able to suppress all the awkwardness of not belonging. Just to make sure she holds his arm even tighter.
"Don't leave me alone for a second," Ana says quietly.
Christian looks down on her in surprise.
"I wouldn't dream of it," he says with a touch of hurt in his voice.
They make their way through the crowded room, constantly stopping to exchange pleasantries. Ana's head is spinning with new names and faces after 15 minutes. Christian has a firm grip around her waist and doesn't let go even when he shakes hands, which is more or less constantly. She loves it; he's stating to everyone that she's just not a date.
There's an introductory passionate speech from a man from Water Aid, complete with a slide show on the consequences of contaminated water. The pictures are mostly of children and they do the trick; there's hardly a dry eye in the room. Ana sincerely hopes that the money from this evening will reach the people who need it; the extravagance around them makes her feel a bit queasy when compared to the slide show.
"Are you okay?" Christian gives her a concerned look. He looks affected to and she just nods. He reaches down and kisses her forehead, then her mouth and immediately she feels better, wishing they were already on their way to her place. How long does one have to stay at these things, surely it's the monetary contribution that matters?
"How many functions like this one do you attend?" Ana asks. How many will she have to attend?
He smiles. "Don't worry, not that many." As if her could read her mind.
"There are some issues that are close to my heart, I make a point to attend those when I can. It's not for the fun of it, but high-profile people brings more attention to the cause." He shrugs. Just the way it is.
Speaking of which, three photographers approach at the same time, competing for Mr. Grey's attention. Ana and Christian dutifully give them what they want. When the photographers are satisfied, Christian bends down and nuzzles her ear, whispering.
"Soon there will be dancing. Will you dance with me, Anastasia?" His tone makes dancing sound like foreplay, something Ana is ready to skip entirely by now. She swallows presses herself, mainly her hips, to his side making him draw his breath quickly.
Someone coughs politely behind them.
"Christian darling."
It's a pleasant, husky voice and to her dismay Ana turns to see that it belongs to Nicole, Christians ex.
Bloody Nicole. And she is Christian-gorgeous. Almost as tall as him, she has long, silky-brown hair, a perfect face with green cat-eyes and a full mouth. It's not hard to see why people thought they belonged together and Ana flushes crimson, although green would be a more appropriate color for what she's feeling.
"Nicole." Christian's voice is flat. He lets her kiss both his cheeks, but his face is cold and he doesn't let go of Ana, who as a consequence gets uncomfortably close to Nicole. The woman naturally smells fantastic. By now it would be less awkward if Christian would loosen his grip around Ana, but when she tries to wiggle free he just holds her even firmer.
"I haven't seen you around in ages – I hope you are well?" Nicole's voice is still pleasant and her smile warm, but her cat-eyes are giving away exactly what she's feeling. And so far she's completely ignoring the woman firmly attached to Christian.
"Oh, I'm very well thank you. I've just been more busy than usual," he replies with a warm voice, looking down on Ana. Hah!
If looks could kill Ana would drop down dead, but Nicole extends her long-fingered, perfectly manicured hand to shake and introduces herself. Ana takes the offered hand and shakes it, but just nods in reply.
Christian helps out. "This is Anastasia Randall, one of Seattle's most prominent editors." Liar.
"Pleasure. So how long have the two of you known each other?" Nicole says sweetly, eyes wandering up and down Ana's body, assessing her. She doesn't look overly impressed.
"Twelve years." Ana answers before Christian can even open his mouth. I was here first and now I'm back. Deal with it.
Nicole turns her burning gaze towards Christian and nods slightly. "I see."
"It was good to see you, Nicole. You look very well." Christian sounds impatient. "Ana and I need to move on. I hope you have a great evening." After a quick nod he turns and makes their way through the crowd toward the dance floor. He completely leaves his ex hanging in an uncharacteristically impolite manner. Like Ana cares.
"So that was Nicole. I'm sorry about that. I should have known she'd be here." He's apologetic.
"I know that was Nicole, Christian. I've seen pictures. I think I might be on her shit-list." Ana smirks and Christian laughs.
"Trust me, many a prominent name is on that list. Mine included. Let's dance your gorgeous ass off, miss Steele, and then we'll go."
…. …. ….
Relaxed and contented they're in bed in Ana's bedroom, leisurely caressing each other. The two-week sexual hiatus has just resulted in a quick and violent reunion. Tonight and tomorrow Ana is entirely his for which Christian is exceptionally grateful given the circumstances. But he's aching to be with her every second he's not.
"So baby … do you mind if we talk about the moving-in-together business a little bit?" He lets his finger trace her jaw line. "Did you get my email this morning? Or would you rather we skip the subject for tonight?"
Fucking hell, he sounds wimpy. But he doesn't want to push his luck, wants it to be her choice entirely.
She picks up on his uncertainty and smiles reassuringly.
"Let's talk. Just please – no surprises. Don't pay for or sign anything until we are completely agreed, ok? I need to be in on this all the way, because I have to be able to prepare Sara properly."
Wow. Direct. But she knows him well – it's just the kind of thing he would do. Buy her a house as a surprise just because he thinks she would like it. However he wouldn't now, because he understands full well it's different. Everything is different now, but that's ok.
"Don't worry Ana. Of course I'm not going to do that." He touches her cheek. The last thing he wants is for this to be a weight on her mind.
"I will do anything in my power to help make this as smooth as possible, Ana. Believe me."
"I know, Christian." She smiles and kisses him. "I trust you."
Her words make his insides all warm and fuzzy. He loves to hear that. "Ok. We know we want to live under the same roof?" Ana nods and grins. "So where could you see yourself living? Which areas, apartment, house?"
He's aware that he sounds almost businesslike and Ana gazes at him, uncertain. "What is it, Ana?"
"It's just … don't you think it will be difficult for us to find something we both like? I mean, I love my little house and would probably like to go more rural if anything – and you're a penthouse-person."
"I'm a penthouse-person?" Christian exclaims in mock horror. "I completely resent that, Miss Steele."
She slaps his arm hard and it actually stings a bit. "You know what I mean," she says grumpily. "You're in this tower in the middle of the city – you're the epithet of urban and have been as long as … I've known you." She glances at him, but he's amused still.
"I know, Ana, but I also can't wait to get out of there. I'm done with that place. And as much as I've been working the past years, it's as much an office as anything. To be completely honest, I don't really care where I live as long as it's with you, and as long as you and Sara will be happy there. Sure, I like to be comfortable, I'd want a certain size and standard, but I doubt to a degree you would mind."
Ana sighs deeply and crawls close to him, depositing her face in his neck. "You are unbelievably amazing, Mr. Grey. You are considerate and loving and smart and hot as hell. I'm so lucky."
Christian tightens his grip around her and he's starting to get that feeling again, when his emotions are to big for his chest and he only knows one way to deal with it. At the same time this conversation is going smoothly and he'd hate to have to start all over again. Control yourself.
"Baby, I become those things with you. It's all because of you."
She snorts. "Yeah, yeah, you keep on telling yourself that. You should ask your family how they see you."
They're sidetracking. He clears his throat, but his voice still comes out husky.
"So, living arrangements. Your view on it, please?"
Ana glances down towards his erection, but he's not going there yet. "Hey. Focus and keep your eyes on mine. You'll get yours later."
She pouts and he almost gives in, but she seems to be considering his question.
"If I could choose freely …" She looks at him and he nods to encourage her. "… then I would want Sara to be able to stay in school, so she wouldn't have to loose her friends. Since she just lost her dad."
Christian nods but doesn't say anything.
"I'd like a garden and a place for my projects. I don't mind a bigger house – as long as I don't have to clean all of it myself and buy all the furniture." She smirks at him."But although the houses you emailed me were stunning and surely very representative of your wealth, I just find them to big. Do you think you'd be able to consider something smaller? Less presidential?"
Christian's let go of Ana while she speaks and is lying on his side watching her. He pokes a finger at her chest.
"Sometimes I get the feeling you're making fun of my wealth, Miss Steele."
She gives him the I'm-completely-innocent-huge-eyes look. "If that's the case, I'm sure it comes with the billionaire territory. What else can the populace do, but joke at your expense?"
He shakes his head and decides on a tiny and very short revenge. But still. He gets out of bed and walks over to his jacket, draped around a chair in the corner. From the inside pocket he pulls out a few folded brochures.
"I know I said no surprises, but..." he shrugs and saunters back to bed where Ana's lying, face pale. She looks like she's stopped breathing.
"Breathe, Anastasia. Don't worry, I haven't signed or paid for anything." He winks at her and she frowns at him, but she's also a little amused. Her breathing's returned to normal.
"What is it then?" She sounds curious.
"It's a house that's for sale, one I thought you might like. I knew very well you wouldn't fall for the listings I sent you this morning, but I thought they'd do some ground work." He winks at her again. "I know you quite well, baby. And I've also considered all the angles you just mentioned. This is what I came up with."
Christian gives Ana the brochures and sits beside her on the bed. The property is a six-bedroom wooden house built at the turn of the century, renovated to a top-modern but tasteful standard. The look on Ana's face reveals everything he needs to know – he's found it. It makes him immensely happy.
"Look at the address," he says hoarsely. "It's not walking distance to Sara's school but it's not far either. She'd be able to keep her friends."
"Oh, Christian, it's beautiful and I would probably love it. But will you be comfortable in something like this? It doesn't seem your style at all." Her voice is shaking a little. Good, she's emotional too.
"You're my style, Ana. And for some reason I'm more comfortable in your home than in my own. I like your taste in decorating. Imagine what you could do with money to spend." He kisses her.
"If, when, we move in together, we do the decorating together. It would be our home. And just so you know – most of my furniture come from yard sales and thrift stores. Not sure that fits your lifestyle." She sneers at him, but he smiles back at her sweetly.
"We in the billionaire territory just call it vintage. So, do you want to see a house tomorrow?"