The red raincoat Ana's wearing is Mia's – or used to be years ago – and is way too big. After folding the sleeves, thus revealing the polka dot lining, it kind of works but she probably looks ridiculous. At least Grace's rubber boots fit.
Christian on the other hand, who has his own rain gear at his parents' house, manages to look good even now. In his dark green coat and boots he looks outdoorsy and hot. The gray weather somehow brings out the color of his eyes even more. She tries to ignore the amused look in them every time he looks at her.
Despite the rain it's not that cold and the walk – which leads them up toward the small forest behind the house – is much nicer than Ana expected. Holding her hand, Christian's fingers are entwined with hers, his thumb grazing her hand, and he's quietly telling her small details on the progress of their new house. He has a few entertaining anecdotes regarding the contractors vs. Grace. Ana's money is definitely on Grace.
The relentless rain eases a little when they reach the forest and Ana takes down the hood of the raincoat. She can feel her cheeks burning but it's not from being cold, it's something else. Christian's warm hand, tangled with hers, is sending warm tingles through her arm and on to her entire body.
They´re on a wide path, which she's never seen before, and she has no idea where they're going, if anywhere. Walking slowly with Christian like this is lovely, since they've hardly been alone for weeks, but there are other things they haven't done in weeks and her body is screaming for him.
They walk quietly for a while, both of them lost in their own thoughts. Ana is imagining that warm hand of his on different parts of her body. It's making her kind of dizzy, and she's considering suggesting that they return home.
Suddenly Christian yanks the hand he's holding so she bumps into him, raincoat to raincoat. The coats make a squeaky noise when they grind together.
"I've missed you, baby," Christian says, letting his free hand curl around her neck. "My god, this weather agrees with you."
He's looking down on her, taking her in it seems, and he lets his long thumb run along her cheekbone. "I don't know if I've ever seen you this beautiful."
Something in his voice, or maybe in his intense gray gaze, makes her eyes go moist. She could say the same about him – this close up she can see every little golden and green speck in his otherwise cloudy-gray eyes. His cheeks are slightly flushed too and the lips full and red, his unruly hair falling down over his forehead. He's unbelievably beautiful, but she doesn't say anything, she just smiles up at him.
Putting his arm around her waist for support, he starts to carefully push her off the path, until her back is leaning against the trunk of an enormous tree. The buttons on her raincoat go "pop", "pop", when Christian slowly runs a finger through them.
"What are you doing, Christian?" Ana asks him softly. "I don't know if …" It's wet everywhere and quite cold, and as much as she's longing for him, the forest might be where she draws a line.
"Hmm. Just need to be a bit closer to you, is all." His voice is low and he leans in and plants the softest kiss possible on her lips, while he unbuttons his own raincoat. "Do you really think I would let you get pneumonia by giving in to my selfish pleasure? I have better control than that, baby."
His lips are on her neck now, nipping and kissing, and his hands round her waist, fingers stroking the bare skin just above the hem of her jeans.
Ana reciprocates and lets her fingers glide under Christian's fine-knit sweater. But contrary to his warn limbs, her hands are icy and Christian squeals, not unlike a girl, at her touch.
"I'm sorry," she giggles, making him press his body against hers and claim her mouth with a growl.
His tongue is violent at first but slowly the kiss changes into something else. It's deep and slow and Ana feels every slight movement his tongue and lips make, every graze and lick. The intensity and need behind it leaves her breathless and longing for more.
Christian is back on her neck again, and she manages to pry her hands loose from his body's hold and tangle her fingers into his moist hair.
"Anastasia," Christian almost whispers to her neck, the vibration from his voice giving her goosebumps of pleasure.
"Anastasia. Are you mine?"
"Yes," Ana breathes. "You know I am. I'm only yours." She gets an even firmer grip on his hair.
"For how long?" His lips are against her ear this time and he's whispering, breath hot.
Ana opens her eyes wide, but she can't see his face since it's mostly buried in her hair and neck. What does he mean, how long? Does he really think she's going to leave him again? A small knot of worry forms in her chest.
"I'm not going anywhere, Christian," she says, a sharp tinge to her voice.
"Ever?" He sounds quite calm. Nipping at her collarbone, he locks her body against the tree trunk with his own and collects her hands in his.
"I'll never leave you. I don't want to and I can't. You're my life." Her voice shakes a little and she wants to put her arms around his neck to reassure him, but she's pinned to the tree, hands above her head. She can't move an inch.
"Good." He's kissing her again, but she breaks her lips from his – the only part of her body she still has any control over it seems.
"Are you mine?" she retorts, voice still shaky.
"Oh, baby." Now he looks at her. "I've always been yours and always will be. You know this. But I will still tell you everyday if you want me to."
While he keeps his gaze locked to hers she feels him pressing the palm of his hand against her palm, entwining their fingers, hands still above her head. When he presses a little harder, the shape of an object digs into her hand, but everything about Christian is so distracting and confusing at the moment. Her wanton self won't let her think straight.
"After what you and I have been through, I think it's safe to say we belong together. Don't you?," he says, eyes not leaving hers for a second. "Christian and Anastasia. Anastasia and Christian. It's epic."
Ana gives him a small smile. "I think I agree with that conclusion."
"Hm." He takes their joined hands down from above Ana's head, brings them to his lips and kisses her knuckles.
Slowly, a vague suspicion enters Ana's mind. "What's in your hand?" she asks quietly, still feeling the object in between their palms.
When he doesn't answer immediately her eyes widen, but he looks down, concentration still on her knuckles.
"Christian?" She makes an effort to make her voice as soft and neutral as possible. "What's in you hand?"
"It's an old dream." He's speaking quietly, but not with hesitation. "One that became a fantasy, because it wasn't in my power to make it happen."
Ana lifts her object-free hand to place it on his cheek, pushing his head gently so he'll look at her. He does, but she can't really read his expression. He looks as if his mind went somewhere else.
"And now?" she says softly.
Instead of replying he goes for her lips again and Ana, though certainly kissing him back, experiences a brief pang of impatience. But this is his thing – he needs to do it his way. She puts as much feeling as she possibly can into the kiss, trying to show him everything she feels for him with her lips and mouth, until he draws back with a gasp, out of breath and with a familiar glaze to his eyes.
"Jesus, Miss Steele, you know how to kiss." he pants. Ana giggles a little. Apparently she does.
He tucks her wet hair behind her ear and gives her a gorgeous, shy and crooked smile.
"But with your permission I would love to be able to call you Mrs. Grey. Mrs. Anastasia Grey," he says softly,
Despite being semi-prepared for this by now, Ana gasps and clenches her hand around Christian's neck for extra support. He's looking up at her shyly through his lashes, but the question in his eyes is intense.
Slowly he flips their joined hands then removes his, leaving the ring to rest in her palm. She blinks rapidly and then stares. It's perfect – simple but exquisite. She loves it.
"Please be my wife, Anastasia." Christian tenderly holds her chin up. "I promise you that from now on, yours and Sara's happiness is my every reason for living, whether you say yes or not. I promise you to be a partner, not just a husband. I promise to be present, not just to support you. And I promise to respect you, not only love you."
Ana swallows. Something's fluttering around in her stomach. Looking up at Christian, she sees conflicting emotions flitting across his face; apprehension, love, impatience. All the same things she's experiencing, but in her gut. Christian is also trying to hide a hint of amusement, like he's thoroughly enjoying watching her reaction.
"I do." Her voice is hoarse and she clears her throat. "I mean yes. And I promise all those things too. Good things."
She's rewarded with an ear-splitting boyish smile and in a very uncharacteristic gesture Christian throws his arms around her waist and spins her. Ana just manages to close her fingers around the ring still in her hand.
When she's back on the ground he takes her face between his hands. "You are so beautiful and I love you. I love you. Let me see what you have in your hand there, baby."
Ana carefully unclenches her tight grip around the ring, goofy smile on her face, letting Christian take it to put it on her finger. It fits of course – she would have been surprised if it didn't – and she's positive it's the most beautiful ring she's ever seen.
"I really, really love it, Christian. It's beautiful. It's perfect." Ana breathes, making Christian's eyes shine with pride.
The ring looks good on her finger, and it feels right. "When did you buy it?" she asks, curious on how long he's been planning to ask her. She suspects it has something to do with their recent scare. The same thought has crossed her mind.
To her surprise, Christian's wide grin shrinks to a small, insecure smile. He looks away for a few seconds but seems to change his mind and locks on her eyes.
"Ana, I've had it for a decade," he says softly while caressing her cheek.
It takes a few moments for Ana's brain to register what he means, but when she understands it feels like someone's punched her in the gut.
"You mean you were going to … you meant to …?" She lets go of Christian's arms and her shoulders slump. The giddy happiness is gone, replaced by the heaviest guilt she's felt since he came back in her life. Just like that. Why did he tell her? Well, she did ask.
Christian's eyes instantly go dark with regret.
"No, no, no, no. No you don't." He grabs her arms and forces her to look him in the eyes. "No guilt, remember? Shit, I shouldn't have told you now." He shakes his head, like his scolding himself. When he continues his tone is desperate.
"Ana, don't you get it? It wouldn't have been right then, we would never have made it. I was just too self-absorbed to know. I thought I kept the ring to remind myself of my stupidity – or as a punishment."
Ana doesn't even bother to hold back her tears. She doesn't know how to feel anymore.
"But now I know why I kept it. I never gave up hope. And now is when it's right. We both know that." Suddenly he smiles brightly at her and she can't help but laugh through the tears. The guilt seems to be washing away with the rain, diluting the salt on her face..
Taking her face in his hands again, he leans in and speaks softly in her ear. "Ana, it makes me happy to be able to give you this particular ring, it means so much to me. Please be happy too."
He's right of course, what's been doesn't matter. And she is happy, happier than ever actually.
She speaks right back in his ear. "I love this ring because you chose it for me, kept it for me. Because I love you, always.
A/N:
And there we are, finally. Sadly, all that's left now is the epilogue. Now I have to find another story to write.
Thank you to all of you who read, and follow, and favorite and all of you who take the time to review.