Chapter 7:

Days went by without so much as a word from the Resistance. Kylo had been sure that he would have heard from his mother by now. Yet all encrypted communication channels were quiet as a mouse. Kylo was beginning to get anxious. If the Resistance held out, he might lose the hold he had gained over Hux's loyalist. They all wanted to know what he was doing about getting Hux back and he was now reconsidering all of the plans he had made on the way to Jasmenerth. He was grateful that he still has his scouts out scouring the Amara system. He wouldn't tell anymore about that yet, though. Not until he found them and decided what to do with them.

The bond with her had also been quiet this whole time. He was growing suspicious that she had gained control over the bond and had decided to keep it closed indefinitely. Under different circumstances he would have been fine with the bond closing off but seeing her gave him insight to what was going on within the Resistance. Plus seeing her made he want to get stronger, she was his muse in a way.

He stood alone in the viewing room and allowed himself to remember the feeling of her lips on his. Though he could tell she had never been kissed before, for some reason kissing her sparked more desire in him than Thalia, Megum, and Kalissa combined. It was slightly infuriating to be so affected by someone he shouldn't want and could probably never have. Though he'd stopped sleeping with Thalia just to see how she would take and she wasn't happy.

It is such a burden to be you, huh nephew, Luke's voice came from behind.

Kylo felt an instant migraine forming near the base of his skull. He had enough problems without the dead man spouting his opinion on everything and the last thing he needed right now was to be lectured about her.

Only when you are around, uncle.

He said the word with as much dislike and ill intent as he could muster. If the force was going to let him see anyone why couldn't it be his grandfather or at the very least, her. Luke came to stand in front of the immensely wide window that allowed Kylo to see for millions of parsecs. The transparent man stood so that Kylo Ren had no choice but to look at him.

I am only here because you are still doing everything in your power to make Rey see you as a monster. Even taking that half-blood traitor into your bed was just a way for you to make her hate you, Luke said circling Kylo. I owe your Jedi nothing. What makes you think that I even want her to see me as anything other than a monster? Maybe she should hate me and I should hate her, Kylo spat, turning to keep the force ghost in his line of vision.

Not that he was worried about Luke harming him; force ghosts were still just ghosts with no real way to affect the physical world. It was more that he was curious as to what the old Jedi would say next.

If she were supposed to hate you, my dear boy she already would and you obviously don't hate her. Rey is supposedly your enemy but you can't even bring yourself to think about her death. Your soul yearns for her, just as hers yearns for you. I can feel it and I'm dead, Luke said. Why are you pushing this hard when you drilled into my head that Jedi weren't allowed to feel for anyone, not allowed to want anyone the way you are suggesting the scavenger and I should allow ourselves to feel for each other?! She is nothing to me, Kylo insisted but Luke just gave him a knowing look. I was wrong, Ben. The Jedi order was wrong. I think the two of you could bring balance to the force if you actually allowed yourselves to care for one another. Rey has never known love just as you feel you have never been loved. You two are what is needed to complete the other, Luke said, almost pleading with his nephew.

Kylo shook his head. He felt like the old man was trying to trick him. She was his precious Jedi, why would he want a monster like Kylo to love her? His head was beginning to ache with the effort to understand what Luke was up to.

Go away, old man. I need to think, Kylo said and made his way out of the viewing room without waiting for the force ghost to respond.

He wandered around the ship for hours contemplating Luke's words. Could love between a dark force user and a light force user really bring balance to the force or was it more than that like it always was when it came to Luke. Though when he did let his mind wander to her he had to admit that he wondered what it would take to have her at his side. Was ruling the galaxy with so many people just waiting for the chance to stick a knife in his back and take all that he has suffered for if he had to do it all alone? Soon he found himself needing sleep.

Kylo moved along the hall as though he was the only one there. No one dared speak to the darkly dressed man as he moved like a predator stalking his prey. Not that Kylo was meaning to give off such a menacing vibe, it was just that what Luke has said was getting to him. Every time the old fart showed up he confused Kylo even more. He wondered if his uncle was stalking her too.

He reached the level where his quarters were located and considered calling one of his female companions to help him relax but as he went to open his door he felt a tingling in the back of his mind. He cursed. Apparently the force was displaying its sense of humor today.

The door hissed open and he stepped inside, eyes sweeping the room for her. He quickly removed his helmet and set it on the table in the middle of the room. Then he took his gloves off, dropping them unceremoniously as he spotted her.

She sat on his bed cross legged, eyes closed in obvious meditation. A low growl of frustration escaped his lips as she sat there unmoving as though he weren't even there. He moved to stand directly in front of her.

You are blocking my sun, she said without opening her eyes. There is no sun on a spaceship, he said. Well I am not on a spaceship, obviously, she said with disdain.

She opened one hazel eye to peek at him. Kylo let out a sigh of frustration. Between this scavenger girl and the old Jedi, Kylo was bound to be driven out of his mind, not that he was the most stable in the first place.

He looked down at her and wished things were simple. It would have been nice to fall into the arms of someone who actually cared about him. In the back of his mind he wished they weren't enemies. He wished he wasn't the Supreme Leader of the First Order and she wasn't the Last Hope of the Resistance. He wished he could just do what his uncle wanted and just love the beautiful young woman sitting in his bed. At least that's how he felt looking at her.

Don't look so smug, he said instead of speaking what was in his heart. Why not? I think I have every reason to be smug. Your general is rotting in a cell under my feet at this very moment and his death squad was taken out. It's been 4 days of no executions, she said with a smile.

He felt his heart stop at the breath taking smile. He'd never seen her smile before. Even if this one was more fierce than happy, it did something to him. At that moment he would have done anything to keep that smile on her face.

I know you probably won't believe this but I am glad you took Hux out of the equation. I am just shocked that my mother doesn't want to ransom him back to me, Kylo said, his voice showing how very tired he was growing of this whole game.

Rey looked up at him. She seemed to be waiting for something. Or maybe she was hearing something from her side of the galaxy. He wasn't sure.

Leia is still trying to decide what to ask for, she said cautiously. Makes sense.

The two of them just looked at each other. Usually Kylo was sure of himself but right then Luke's words were rattling around in his head. He wondered if she would accept him in any capacity at this point in time. If he just admitted to her everything he's wanted to tell her since the throne room, would things change between them?

No female companions today, huh, she asked stretching her legs out so that her feet touched the floor. Would be kind of awkward with you already being in my bed, he said, a half smile tugging at his lips.

She looked around. He knew she couldn't see his surroundings without his permission so he allowed her to slip a little further into his mind. She gasped as she became able to see everything around her. She moved around the room looking at everything including a drawing he'd done of her.

Blush crept into his face. He hadn't meant for her or anyone else to see it. He stayed still as he watched her pick the paper up and study it. Her eyes swung to him, taking him in as though she'd never seen him before. She was quiet long enough to make him uncomfortable.

It's not my best work but I also didn't plan on you ever seeing that, he admitted.

She looked from him to the drawing again. Then she sighed.

I've never seen a picture of myself before. Is this what I look like to you, she asked and the question wasn't hostile just curious.

The only time they'd spent this much time together without either of them trying to kill the other was back in the throne room. He was surprised at her question, he would have expected her to question the fact that he drew at all.

That's how you looked at me after I kissed you, he said.

It was Rey's turn to blush.

Why did you kiss me?

Kylo looked away first.

Because it threw you off and because I wanted to…

He was shocked that she didn't seem surprised at the news.

I offered you a home and you pretty much threw it back at me. I don't blame you. I did the same thing. I just… The First Order has taken so much from so many people. When you were just Snoke's underling it was easier to accept the things you did but now… you're running the show now. I can't blame your actions on someone else but I can blame Hux's actions on you. It makes me regret…

She stopped and Kylo almost fell over. He was hanging on her every word. He took a tentative step towards where she stood by his desk. She was staring down at the picture. She hadn't looked at him since he admitted that he had wanted to kiss her.

Makes you regret what, he asked in a quiet voice. It makes me regret what I feel for you…

…

She watched him as her words hit him. So many emotions passed over his darkly handsome face that she couldn't even begin to catch them all. She wondered what he was thinking now that she had admitted out loud what she hadn't even been able to accept in the quiet of her own mind.

Ever since he'd kissed her, she hadn't been able to get him out of her head and the irrational jealousy she felt every time she thought about the mysterious woman in his bed made things worse. Now here she was standing in his bedroom with an immaculately drawn picture of her in her hands talking to a man she still considered her enemy/pet project about feelings she really didn't want to have.

And what do you feel for me, Rey, he asked, speaking her name for the first time in ages.

She groaned and her eyes dropped to the ground. He was going to make her say it out loud. Why he couldn't just take the partial admission for what it was?

I told you about my vision of us in the future. I saw us together, leading together… Not as Master and Padawan, not as the Dark and the Light but as equal partners, equally invested in what we were doing and each other…Some twisted part of me cares for you even after all of the terrible things you've done, she said. Would you feel better if I said some part of me wants to be better just for you, he asked.

She looked up in surprise. He was a lot closer than he'd been before she started talking. He was staring at her from only a few inches away now.

None of it matters though. As long as you allow the First Order to bully, enslave and murder innocent people, it doesn't matter if you want to be better for me. I stand on one side of the line and you stand on the other. My friends probably would never forgive me if they found out that I care for you, she said in a rush of breath. The same could be said of my underlings. I don't know if I have enough of their support to change the First Order in its entirety. Not without having to shed more blood. It would be easier to just disband it. And even to do that I would need time, he said even though he had no clue where these words were coming from.

She stared up at him and it felt as though it was Ben Solo was looking back at her. Without her permission her hand came up to brush finger tips along his cheek. His true brown eyes closed briefly at the contact and he leaned into it. He was reacting as though he'd gone forever without any real human contact but Rey knew that wasn't true as he'd just had a woman in his bed not even a week ago. At that thought her hand dropped back to her side and she took a step back from him.

The moment was over. They both needed to come back to reality. Whatever was happening between them, which she suspected had less to do with the Force Bond and everything to do with how lonely they both seemed, didn't matter in the grand scheme of things. Not unless he'd meant it about changing the Order or disbanding it. She needed to focus on something else so that her heart would stop beating so hard in her chest.

Who was the woman in your bed, she asked, her insane jealousy sparked her anger.

She was more comfortable being angry with him than whatever they'd just shared. He however laughed. It was a soft chuckle and it sent a shiver down her spine.

You're so cute when you're jealous. She is an ally and as close as I've had to a friend in a long time, but still expendable, he said seriously. So she's good enough to sleep with but still expendable, Rey asked, her eyes flashing with anger. She is expendable because she is loyal to Snoke's vision of the First Order. She is expendable because she is the means to an end. She is expendable because she is not this annoying little force user who keeps invading my dreams and my waking hours with these beautiful but sad Hazel eyes, he said.

She looked at him like she didn't believe him. He chuckled again.

Would it make you feel better if I told you I stopped sleeping with her, he asked. Is she the only woman you were sleeping with?

She shouldn't have cared, really, but the thought of him in the arms of another woman was almost too much to bear. Her eyes dropped to the ground.

Do you want the truth or a lie?

She looked up at him.

Forget I even said anything. I have no right to ask. I wish I hated you, Kylo Ren, she said quietly. I don't think I could handle it if you told me you were sleeping with some guy. So I don't blame you for being angry or jealous. I still want you by my side. Someone told me that if I stopped trying to be a monster, you wouldn't see me as one, he said and she nodded. I didn't believe it. I thought for sure that you would hate me forever, he said. I am not happy with you but I haven't hated you since the Force Bond first opened. You make me angry and I'm often afraid of you but I don't hate you. If you promise to think about changing the direction of the First Order, I will try to convince my friends that maybe you aren't as bad as they think, she said. I don't want to be your enemy anymore, Rey. It's too much to be connected to you like this and try to force myself to hate you, he said and she understood exactly what he meant.

It was like trying to hate her own dark reflection. Every time he did something awful she would tell herself that there was no saving Ben Solo but as soon as she was alone in bed she couldn't help but wonder what it would be like to be at his side, whether it was the way that he pictured it or how she had. And the dreams were even worse. It was nice to know that she also invaded his dreams the way he constantly did her's.

Then you have to make a change, Kylo, she said and there was tenderness in her voice. And you need to be more understanding, all of you do. Snoke ruled the Order with an iron fist for so long that for many of the members of the First Order, violence and chaos is all they know. Like I said I would need time to find out who is loyal to me, who is loyal to Hux and who is loyal to Snoke's vision of the First Order before I could even begin trying to change things, he said. How much time, she asked and his smiled a small smile. A year to begin the process of turning the first order from a murder machine to something that would contribute to society rather than take from it.

Rey smiled a half smile at his words. A year to change his mother's mind about her son being a lost cause. A year to convince Rose, Finn and Poe that Kylo Ren, Ben Solo was a different man without the influence of Snoke, that he was a dark Jedi who could still be saved and not a Sith Lord with no chance of redemption.

I will talk to Leia and the others but until I have proof I doubt anyone will believe that you've had this change of heart, she said. I think you should wait unless you plan on telling them all about the force bond right away. I will contact my mother soon, but I have to come up with something to tell her first. And unfortunately, I may have to continue doing things that you don't like until I know who I can trust. Plus dismantling the power structure that Snoke had set up could prove detrimental to the very people you are trying to protect.

He was looking down at her with something like hope in his eyes. Rey reached out with the force to touch his mind and caught flashes of a conversation involving a voice that sounded strangely like Luke's. She couldn't get in deep enough to see anything though.

What could Luke have possibly told you to make such a change occur in you Kylo Ren? I was expecting another fight when I felt you enter my mind. Especially with us capturing Hux and killing so many of your best men, she said still staring at him. I told you Hux was a problem I was just looking for a way to rid myself of. I was never going to negotiate for his life, Kylo said. Your mother was going to ask that you leave every planet who did not wish you there. Poe and I tried to tell her that it wasn't possible let alone something you would agree to. I said we should ask for a sit down, she said suddenly nervous.

She could feel the force pulling them back to where they were supposed to be. Kylo stared down at her. He seemed to be thinking. Rey's heart was racing a mile a minute. This was all going so differently than she had imagined. After their last encounter Rey had been unsure of where things stood. Sure, she wanted to end his cruel reign over the galaxy that never changed no matter what she felt. What was changing was how she was to go about ending his reign.

A week ago, she'd been sure that she was going to have to kill him and Hux and anyone else who wanted to leave the galaxy the way it was with wealthy and powerful people standing at the top on the shoulders of billions upon billions of oppressed people all fighting and killing each other just to have a chance of survival. But now, if Kylo Ren was really willing to redirect the First Order's purpose to stomping out corruption and helping bring peace and equality to the galaxy then maybe letting him rule would be for the best.

If my mother contacts me and asks for a sit down, I will accept it. As long as you are involved, Kylo said. I'm not a general or anything. I don't know if she'll allow it, but I will ask.

Suddenly Rey was standing in the bright red sun light of Olara all alone. The breeze blew around her and she thought about what she was going to say when she had to talk to Leia. Then again, she would be infinitely easier than the boys and poor Rose who'd just woke up. She was still heavily grieving her sister and would likely be very angry with Kylo.

Rey started walking back toward the base when she felt a familiar presence. Rey spun around but wasn't surprised to see Luke standing there. He was much younger than he had been when she'd known him, and he had a smirk on his face. All the same he was Luke Skywalker, just transparent.

Rey, it is good to see you, Luke said still smirking. Master Luke, I didn't know you could appear like this, Rey said excitedly. There are many things I didn't teach you when I had the chance and I deeply regret it now. I came here for a reason though. You and Ben need to bring balance to the Force and soon. What are you talking about? How can Kylo Ren and I bring balance to the force, Rey asked suddenly panicked.

Luke full out smiled at her. Though it was a wary smile. Rey was trying to see passed that wary smile to what was really going on, but it was hard to read a ghost.

You two must work together. You have to take in his darkness and he has to take your light into him. There were things that both sides of the force were wrong about and because we were all so arrogant we didn't realize there were other powers out there that are more of a threat to life as we know it than anything we've seen before. You two have to do what you must to bring the light and dark sides together. I felt that you were the one who would take this news better and actually work at this goal without tainting the whole point of it. You two will need to be united and you will need the strength of both armies. As many people as you can muster but also seek out the force users scattered through out the galaxy. You must convince my sister of this, too, Luke said. But I'm just a scavenger from Jakku what difference can I make? I'm not even really a Jedi, Rey stammered. My nephew is more than qualified to teach you everything you need to know about the force, but he is temperamental and won't like having to step back into the light. I have tried to prepare him, but I have a feeling he will take it better coming from you, Luke said with a reassuring look. But what about taking on the dark side. How do I keep myself from falling too completely, she asked.

Luke just smiled at her and was gone. Rey found herself frowning. How was she supposed to train to be a Jedi, track down other force users, and end a war between the First Order and the Resistance to get everyone to work together to defeat some unknown threat?