Hope you enjoyed the last chapter, and so here's the third! Hope you enjoy this chapter! Don't forget to review, I love you! This is my first time attempting to write a humor story, so sorry if it kinda sucks. I usually write really sad and angst stuff, but I decided to try something different, and I'm really enjoying this. I hope you're enjoying reading it as much as I enjoy writing it!

I AM SO SORRY IT'S BEEN SO LONG SINCE I'VE UPDATED!

Dedicated to: Everyone, cause you're all amazing, especially my lovely reviewers!

Disclaimer: I do not own FMA, but you wish I did, don't you? (Of course you don't)

Chapter Three:

Cafeteria Lunch Dates and Hand Holding

Roy was laying in his bed -having just returned home from Edward's house- and was currently pondering the situation he found himself in. Maybe it would've been easier if he had said no when Winry asked if they were dating. Maybe no one would've heard about it, or maybe simply no one would care. Roy mentally rolled his eyes. This was high school after all, and if anyone had caught wind of this little thing that he and Ed were pulling, the entire school would blow-up about it. Then again, it wasn't everyday that the popular, womanizing flirt was suddenly in a committed relationship with his younger prodigy best friend.

Sighing, Roy turned on his side. It definitely would've been easier if he has said no to Winry. Why did Ed say his name anyway? Ed could've easily said a different name -could've even claimed it was a girl- or he could've just rejected her instead of lying. But that wasn't the case. Ed had said his name, and so now it was his job as the best friend to help Ed with this.

Well, it may not be easy, but it'd certainly be interesting.

Edward slammed his hand on his alarm clock, groaning as he forced himself out of bed. He never really looked forward to going to school, but especially not today. He had to face Winry again, should she choose to talk to him. Sure, she confessed to him and all, but then again she now thinks he's gay (which he is) and doesn't every straight girl want a gay best friend? Maybe that was a myth, but he was pretty sure he had heard the girls in the hallways talking about stuff like that.

Squeezing the minty toothpaste on his red toothbrush, he brushed his teeth vigorously as he continued with his thoughts. Although, unfortunately for the girls at his school, he wasn't a flamboyantly fashionable gay guy. After all, that was just a another stereotype that he hated. In fact, most people said he had terrible taste (which Ed disagreed with. Red and black, skulls and spikes were fucking awesome and no one would ever convince him otherwise). Maybe this whole thing will just blow over, and he could carry on with his daily school life.

Slipping on his red hoodie, Ed had actually thought that that could possibly be true. That no one would've heard of his and Roy's 'dating' or had seen the events that had transpired yesterday. Unfortunately, there were club activities yesterday, and its possible -and likely- that someone else besides Winry had seen the things that had happened yesterday. But well, Ed would deal with that when it happened.

And so, he let it completely slip his mind, shooing the topic out of his head. And with that, he grabbed his backpack and walked down the stairs.

It was second block when yet another person approached him with a curious look on their face. Knowing this was bound to continue to happen throughout the day, he closed his locker door after grabbing the needed textbook.

"Hey Roy..." The girl began, shuffling her feet nervously. "Uh, I was uh... Just wondering if it was true?"

Of course, Roy wasn't an idiot. He knew exactly what she was referring to, but just for the hell of it, he wanted her to say it herself. It was rather obvious that she was one of his many admirers, and while he wasn't in the business of heartbreaking, he wasn't in the business of leading people on either. Sure, he was a bit of a flirt, but it was all in good fun, not to break people's hearts.

"Is what true?" He asked, flashing a dazzling grin at the nervous girl.

"That uh, you and uh..." She paused, as if mentally preparing herself to ask the question that had been on her mind all morning since she had heard the whispers passing the rumor around and seen the shocked texts from her friends. "That you and uh, Edward are... You know... Dating?"

Roy personally didn't understand why this was such a seemingly hard question to ask. Well, maybe this girl found this question just awkward to ask, maybe because she was uncomfortable with the fact Edward was a male and wouldn't have a hard time asking if it was a female. Or maybe it's because she most likely had a crush on him. Or maybe it was simply because she was shy. Roy wasn't entirely sure why he was putting so much thought into why she was asking him this, but for some reason he was. Was it really that big of an issue that he and Edward were 'dating'?

"Yes." Roy replied, still smiling.

Roy was considered popular after all, so it was practically a requirement that he show brilliant smiles constantly. That was one thing Roy almost envied about Ed, he never put on pretenses, he was just himself. When he was happy he showed it. When he was angry he definitely showed it. Sure, Edward wasn't popular -no where close, in fact- but at least he never had to smile when all he wanted to do was tell people to mind their own fucking business.

Yeah, that was another good thing about Edward. He was always himself... He didn't give two shits about what other people thought.

People that had been eavesdropping around them gasped, a girl shrieked and boys whispered something about 'no homo'. This was high school, after all. Meanwhile the girl just gave a small smile and wished him and Edward the best of luck. Roy continued on with his classes as if it had never happened. But Roy couldn't help but wonder what would happen if he and Ed were to actually start dating. And he couldn't believe he almost had to remind himself that he and Ed weren't actually dating.

This was just pretend.

They were just playing pretend.

Ed sat next across from Roy at the cafeteria table, ignoring the glances from envious girls or other curious onlookers. You'd think they'd be used to it by now. Roy and Ed had sat together for lunch since middle school, so why the strange glances now? Oh yeah... That's right... It's because they're 'dating'. That little tidbit had almost completely escaped his mind, seeing as he hadn't seen Winry all day, and no one dared approach him to ask themselves, and he had instead been focusing on his chemistry work which he found extremely fascinating.

"Okay, am I the only one who's been getting weird looks all day?" Ed asked as he shoved his slice of pizza into his mouth with the same amount of grace and elegance as a pig, or perhaps a hungry dog.

Roy sighed. He should've known that he was the only one people would actually talk to about the new hot topic of the school, seeing as most people either hated Ed (for some reason), feared him (Ed was known to get angry easily), or had already asked Roy. Then again, if Roy was one of his peers, he probably wouldn't want to ask the short temperamental prodigy kid if he was dating his male best friend or not either.

And the blond was too fucking dense about social situations to realize that they were all staring at them to see if they could figure out whether they were really dating or not, Winry included. Halfway through lunch (Ed still eating like a starved animal) Roy realized he was really fucking tired of not being able to eat his own damn sandwich without getting weird-ass looks from the people around him who were too curious for their own good.

What did they expect? The fact that they were 'dating' had become known, so now they were suddenly going to get all hot and heavy on the cafeteria table? Uh, no thank you, fuckwads.

There was pizza sauce on the corner of the shorter teen's lips, and after glancing out of the corner of his eye to make sure his peers were still watching, Roy swiped his thumb across Ed's mouth -successfully cleaning the pizza sauce off of his mouth- and licking his finger clean with a smirk spreading across his face.

The other students gaped openly, and Ed blushed furiously. "What the hell was that?" He whispered angrily, swiping his hand across his mouth.

"Just playing the part, darling." Roy teased, placing his hand on Ed's metal hand that had been laying on the table top, entwining their fingers and his smirk growing as people turned away from them and towards each other to gossip about what they had all just seen. This was what high school was like, putting on a show for other people. So he and Ed would just have to put on a show for them.

Ed growled, knowing he couldn't pull his hand away from Roy's without someone noticing and thus making their act not very convincing. So instead, Ed plastered on a sickeningly sweet smile, his eyebrows twitching in irritation. Squeezing Roy's hand tightly and while to others it might look like a cute romantic gesture... But only Roy and Edward knew that Roy had chosen his automail hand to hold, and therefore he was causing Roy immense pain in his hand by gripping it tightly.

"Oh you're right, dear." Edward stressed, leaning across the table. "I'm so lucky to have such a caring and considerate boyfriend like you."

Roy suppressed his groan of pain, and mentally noted that the next time he wants to embarrass Edward and show-off to his peers he should grab the left hand, not the right. Masking the pain in his hand with a cool smile, he grinned at Ed. "Yes, you are lucky. Just like I'm lucky to have a boyfriend who doesn't cause me physical pain."

Ed loosened his grip on his hand, and Roy let out a breath of relief that the circulation was back in his hand. "Yeah, you're damn right you're lucky." Ed scoffed, taking his left hand -his right hand still being held tightly in Roy's own- and stuffing his face with food once again.

Smirking with amusement, Roy held up his own carton of milk and held it towards Ed. "Seeing as I'm such a caring and considerate boyfriend, I'll give you my milk. Help you grow a little, shorty. Maybe one day I'll be able to kiss you without having to get you a stepladder."

The blond wasn't entirely sure if he should blush or dump that carton of milk on Roy's stupid hair.

They were walking to Edward's house together, as usual. Alphonse (who usually walked home with them as well) had stayed behind for club activities, thus leaving the two older teens alone. It was sunny out, and Ed shielded his eyes from the sun as they walked along the brick sidewalk on the way to his house.

"Roy?" Ed asked softly, walking slower than before.

The raven-haired teen had almost stopped in his tracks upon hearing the tone of voice his best friend was using. "Yeah Ed?"

"I'm... Well, you know, I'm sorry. For dragging you into all this crap."

Roy smiled at Ed before grabbing the right gloved hand of the golden-eyed boy. He couldn't believe Ed felt guilty about something like this, enough to actually apologize. Was it a bit more hard than an average school day? Yeah, but it also added some interesting points that wouldn't have been there otherwise. "It's okay, Ed. This is what best friends are for, right?"

Ed looked down at his feet, a small smile edging it's way onto his face as he squeezed Roy's hand back. Gently, unlike before in the cafeteria. "Right." He answered, and they resumed their walk in a peaceful silence.

And this time, they held hands, both knowing that there was no one around for them to put on a show for.

To Be Continued

Here's a thank you in advance for all my lovely reviews, you really brighten up my day! Again, I'm so sorry I hadn't updated in forever, I've been rather busy.

Note: I will be going camping from August 3rd to August 13th, so I won't be able to update anytime during then (seeing as I'm in a cabin in the woods with no internet connection) but I'll do my best to update when I get back!