Well, I did it. I got this up before I went on vacation. YAH ME! Anyway, just an FYI, I'll be going on hiatus again to work on my Adventure Time anthology. To make up for lost time, I won't be working on this series again until I've added at least 5 new chapters to Vampire Kingdom. So please be patient. Also, I'm sorry in advance if the epilogue is a little dull, but I honestly couldn't come up with a better ending. Anyway, Star vs the Forces of Evil is owned by Disney and Stands are the creation of the brilliant and talented Hirohiko Araki. Yadda. Yadda. Enjoy.

1-Up Girl: Epilogue.

(Alcari Nebula, Polaris Galaxy: July 8, 2046)

"And… that's pretty much it." The kunoichi said cheerily as she brought her story to a close. "From then on Oskar and I were boyfriend and girlfriend~ We went to movies together~ Went to all the school dances~ Oh~ It was just like a fairytale~"

"AHEM!" went Artemis, attempting to play it off as a simple clearing of the throat.

"Oh, uh… sorry about that." The older woman said, sounding slightly embarrassed. "Sometimes I just get a little carried away. Especially when I'm talking about my man~ What were we talking about again?"

"I believe you were about to tell us what happened next." Marisol said politely.

"Oh right, of course. Well, after I regained consciousness and answered a few questions for the news crew that had shown up, Jackie and I went back down to the park to let everyone know we were alright. Jefferson was so proud of me. And so were my parents. Heck, everyone was. I was the talk of the school for weeks. And from that day on no one ever called me StarFan again. Well, expect for Janna when she was mad. Which was a lot, now that I think about it."

"Well regardless it sounds like a proper happy ending." The young princess said cheerily.

"Kinda cheesy if you ask me. But I guess it beats Aunt Jackie's story." Artemis chimed in dismissively before adding. "Although, that part where you turned into a frog was pretty cool. What was that all about?"

"Yes, I'm actually rather curious about that myself."

"What? You mean Stand Fusion?" the kunoichi asked confusedly. "Didn't your mom ever tell you about that? I mean, she can do it a lot better than I can."

"Are you kidding? Mom never tells us anything. It's nothing but secrets and lies with her." The rebel princess said annoyedly before devolving into a mild rant. "Before this summer the only thing we knew about her was that she had a Stand. And even that we didn't get straight from her; our dad had to explain it to us when we were four, during one of the few times they let us leave the palace. Which by the way is not the original, as we'd been led to believe, but of course I had to find that out from a gossipy chambermaid. I tell you, it just makes me so mad I could-OCK!"

As usual, Marisol had to stifle her sister with a quick jab to the stomach.

"Seriously! How did you get so strong!"

"So, Aunt Annie, you're saying our mother can perform this… Stand Fusion technique as well?" asked the posh princess, ignoring her sister's question all together.

"Uh… yes." She replied, seeming mildly off put by the posh princess' brutish display. "I can't believe Star never told you about this. I mean, it's kind of a big deal."

"How so?"

"Well for one thing, Jefferson had never seen or heard of anything like it; and he was our resident expert on this stuff. Jackie even went to ask her talking tree friend, but he didn't know anything either. As far I know, I was the first person to ever pull it off." The kunoichi explained, practically beaming with pride. "Of course, I'd done it completely by accident, and it would take me another three years before I figured out how to do it again, but still, I proved it was possible. And that's probably why your mom was able to pick it up so quickly."

"So… how does this… Stand Fusion thing work exactly?" Artemis asked, finally recovering from her sister's blow. "You were a little… vague on the details earlier."

"Oh, it's not all that complicated really. It's sort of like when a person manifests their Stand through an inanimate object. Only in this case the object is a human body." Annie explained in a sort of motherly / teacherly tone. "But still, even if the idea behind it is simple, I really wouldn't recommend it. Stand Fusion is unbelievably dangerous. Besides me and your mom, only one other person has ever tried it and survived."

"Really? Who?" asked the rebel princess with a sudden burst of enthusiasm.

"Uh… that's a story for another day. Sorry girls." The kunoichi said, soundly a teensy bit uneasy before adopting a much more stable tone. "Is there anything else you'd like to know?"

Sensing that this was going to be one of those things that wouldn't be explained until later, Marisol decided not to press the issue and steered the conversation elsewhere.

"Well, Aunt Annie, if it's not too much trouble, I'd be very interested to learn what became of Ringo's other captives. Did they manage to find happiness after that horrid ordeal?" the young princess asked politely.

"Oh, I don't think you'll hear any complaints from those nutbars." Annie said with a hint of cheerful nostalgia in her voice. "Britney and I stayed friends for most of high school. Up until her folks moved to the east coast. We kinda lost touch after that, but every now and then I check out her show on ESPN. As for Ferguson, he ended up inventing some car that runs on static electricity. He's like the richest man on Earth now. Crazy, huh?"

"Yeah, down right certifiable." Artemis said jokingly before adopting a much slyer demeanor. "So… what ever happened to Chantelle?"

Suddenly, the elder Stand User got a very uncomfortable look on her face.

"Uh… that's another story for another day." She replied in a clear attempt to brush off the subject. "But hey, let's not spend the whole day talking about old times. You kids are only gonna be here a few weeks, so let's have some fun. I say we all go down to the Havoc Room for a rollicking game of Extreme Simon Says. What do you say, ladies?"

But alas, the other Valkyries did not respond.

"Uh… ladies?"

Deeply confused by the silence, Annie quickly spun around to find that her loyal friends and teammates were nowhere to be found.

"What in the hell? Where'd they all go?"

"Oh, they all left like an hour ago to get pizza." Artemis answered bluntly.

"What? But… But I love pizza! Why didn't they invite me?"

"I believe Miss Lucile was still angry at you for telling us about that embarrassing toilet story, so she convinced the others to 'ditch' you while you were busy 'blah-blah-blah-ing'." Marisol explained with her usual air of politeness. "As I recall, they all snuck out while you were recounting how Aunt Janna tore up your drawing."

"Oh, well isn't that just peachy." The kunoichi said annoyedly. "What are we supposed to do now?"

"Can't we still do that Simon Says thing you talked about?" Artemis asked confusedly.

"No we can't. Roxy's the only one who knows how to work the controls."

"Well… how about another story?" asked Marisol. "I'd be very interested to know how you became a Valkyrie in the first place."

This seemed to do the trick, as the elder Stand User's mood immediately perked up.

"Well… since you asked~" she said as her tone turned both perky and nostalgic. "It all started during my junior year of college. It was a Tuesday, I think… no wait, it was Wednesday. I know that seems like a minor detail, but trust me, it's important for later, so don't forget it. Anyway, I was walking to my creative writing class when I noticed a rubber chicken just laying on the sidewalk. Had I known all the trouble that little pullet would cause me I would've just left it right where it was. But of course, I didn't know, so I picked it up and stashed it in my backpack for safekeeping. And thus I unknowingly began the single most amazing adventure of my entire life."

End Notes:

Coming… in a really long time…

Part 5: A Clock in my Head.

Bangles vs YYZ.

Get ready to learn the exciting backstory of the incomparable Jefferson Speedwagon.