Today had been a nice day, Bill decided. He got home from work earlier than usual; his boss had actually smiled at him today; and Fleur was making his favourite food.
Sitting happily on the couch, he hummed a cheery tune and turned off the TV when his wife informed him that dinner was ready.
Bill was just about to call his children downstairs for dinner when the his mobile phone rang.
"Hello", he answered happily, seeing as the Caller ID said it was Ginny calling.
He frowned immediately when his sister did not answer, and he was met with a shaky breathing instead. "Ginny?"
After what seemed like ages, his sister's voice came through. "Bill? Are you home?", she asked him quietly; her voice unusually sad, forced and just so, so not Ginny. He could detect the strain in her voice and was sensing, that she was trying desperately to stay calm. "Yes, I'm home. Ginny, what's wrong." He was starting to panic himself, the good mood from earlier suddenly gone. Getting up, he started to pace through the living room; the last sun rays of the day shining through the window and seeming very out of place now.
"Is Victoire with you? Is she home?"
"Ginny, what happened?", he asked, more forcefully, his voice growing louder with each word, worry taking over. Something was clearly wrong, and he didn't know what. Bill felt claustrophobic suddenly, his sister was obviously on the edge of crying, and she wouldn't tell him what was wrong, when it was obvious something was. Something bad had happened, he was sure.
"Ginny, talk to me! What happened?"
He registered that Fleur had appeared in the doorway, worry spread all over her face.
"Ginny!", he shouted one last time.
Finally his sister answered.
"Teddy is dead.", she said quietly.
Bill stopped pacing around the room and came to a halt.
"What?"
"Teddy is dead. He was hit by a car and died a few hours ago."
Teddy is dead. Teddy is dead. Teddy is dead.
The words rang in his head over and over again.
He is dead. He died a few hours ago. Is Victoire home. Teddy is dead. He died a few hours ago. Is Victoire home.
Bill stood where he was and let the words sink in.
No more late night visits from his daughters boyfriend, no more sheepish apologies from the young boy he used to play chess against. No more staring contests against the lanky teenager he grew so fond of, no more late night talks with the son of the man he used to admire. No more Teddy.
Where worry was a few moments ago, was now sudden sadness, disbelief, shock.
He was still staring at the same spot when he heard Ginny's voice again.
"You need to tell your family. I can't…" He heard his sister breaking into sobs which she had obviously holding back the whole time. Tears started to prickle in his eyes, so he quickly blinked a few times to stop them from falling.
You need to tell your family. You need to tell your family. Oh god, Victoire.
He closed his eyes and swallowed the big lump in his throat. Oh, god.
"Bill, did you hear me?", Ginny asked, now manifestly in tears.
"Yes, yes. Oh god, Ginny. What.." He searched for the right words, but found none.
What did you say in a situation like this?
"I know" Ginny said. "I'll call you later. I…" She didn't finish her sentence, but hung up instead.
Bill stood there for a few more seconds, until Fleur appeared in front of him. How long had she been standing there? He couldn't tell.
"Bill!"
Had she been calling his name more than once?
"Bill, what's wrong? What happened, you look as if you've seen a ghost. What did Ginny say?"
She was staring at him, worry clearly in her eyes.
He looked his wife in the eyes, as she put his phone down and let it fall on the couch behind him.
"Teddy. He died."
Fleur gasped loudly and put her hands over her mouth.
She stared at him with wide eyes, and he could see that she was already close to crying. He didn't care, as he knew, that worse was still to come; he needed to get this out.
"He was hit by a car a few hours ago."
How horrible that sounded. How horrible the truth was. How could someone deserve something like this? Why would a nineteen year old boy be ripped out of his life. Just like that.
Fleur was openly crying right now.
"Oh my god. Bill.."
She put her arms around her husband and leaned her head on his chest. He quietly stroked her back, and held back tears of his own. But he couldn't cry. Not yet. Not when he still had to tell his children. Not when he still had to tell Victoire.
Fleur seemed to have the same thought, as she suddenly jumped back and looked at him with wide eyes.
"Victoire. She doesn't know, oh my god." She was crying still. "My poor baby. Oh my god."
"I'll tell her. You tell Louis and Dominique.", he told her, before he made his way to the staircase.
Fleur followed after him, as he climbed the stairs to the bedrooms. She knocked on their son's door, while he passed his younger children's rooms to stand in front of his eldest daughter's room.
Bill knocked quietly and pushed the door open, as his daughter invited him in with a friendly "Come in.". He entered her room and found her sitting on her bed.
She was smiling. Oh, dear god. Bill suddenly wished to do anything but this. This would destroy her world, he knew that as well as his own name. She would completely break down. He took a deep breath and sat next to her anyway.
"What's wrong, Dad?" She turned down her music and shut the laptop, as she saw the look on his face.
"Victoire, honey", he began and hoped his voice sounded stronger than he felt. "Something happened."
Victoire stared at him, looking for clues in his faces as to what exactly had happened. She looked confused, but worry spread out on her face as she realized that it must be something serious.
"What happened?"
"Your Aunt Ginny called me…Teddy…He, he had an accident."
He could see his daughters eyes widen as soon as he said it. She sat up straighter, her hands already reaching for her phone, clearly with the intention to call her late boyfriend.
Bill grabbed his daughter's hands and held them where they were.
"Vic…"
"I need to call him, is he alright? What happened?" She grew impatient with him as he didn't answer her questions. "Dad!"
"Victoire, he didn't make it. He's dead."
Victoire's frantic movements stopped as soon as he said it. She stared at her father with empty eyes and slowly pulled her hands back.
Bill swallowed, she was showing no reaction.
As he was about to say something else, Victoire shook her head, a small smile on her lips.
"You're lying."
She grabbed her phone and began scrolling through her contacts, until she found the one she was looking for.
Bill's heart fell. This was worse than he could have ever imagined.
"Victoire, I'm not lying. He's…"
"You're lying. Stop it, it's not funny.", she shouted and stood up from where she was sitting.
She had the phone pressed to her ear and was obviously waiting for him to pick up.
He will never pick up the phone again, Bill thought bitterly.
"It's his voice mail. He must have forgotten to charge his phone. He does that often." She was laughing quietly. "I'll just call his grandmother. Maybe he's home already."
Bill stood up and approached his daughter carefully. She was looking for another contact already, obviously Andromeda.
Bill put his hands on her arms again, trying to stop her from calling another person.
"Victoire, Victoire, look at me."
"Stop that!", she was screaming now. "What are you doing? I need to talk to him! Maybe he's hurt!"
She was close to tears, he could see that. He could always see that. Even when she was little and had hurt herself while playing outside and trying not to show that she had. He could always see when she was about to cry, and he would always be able to. Seeing his oldest daughter like this made his heart ache.
"Victoire, he's gone. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry."
Victoire took a few steps back and shook her head; the phone had fallen from her hands, which were shaking like crazy. "No, he's not. You're lying." She was only whispering now, as if she was trying to convince herself that she was right, and her father was indeed lying. Maybe she thought if she kept telling herself that he was, he would break out into a huge smile and confirm, that yes, he was lying and it was all a big, horrible joke. And maybe Teddy would enter the room after that, and tell her in his stupid mocking voice, that they had tricked her, and that she was so gullible, because how could she have fallen for that? Because Teddy was not dead. He couldn't be. They had just talked to each other this morning. They had planned to see each other this evening. He was supposed to pick her up in a few hours. He had even bought the tickets for that stupid new superhero movie he wanted to see so bad. He hadn't stopped talking about it for days, until she had finally given in to see it with him (of course she did, she always did). People didn't just die like that.
Except they did.
Bill embraced her face with his face and she tore her eyes away from the empty spot in the room and looked at her father. He didn't say anything, he just pulled his daughter close to him and put his arms around her. Victoire went still in his arms for a few seconds, but then she suck in a sharp breath and it didn't take long before she struggled to get out of the embrace.
"No, no!", she tried to get away, but Bill was stronger than her and held her closer.
"I'm sorry, Vic, I'm so sorry.", he kept telling her as she was crying in her fathers arms, sobbing loudly; trying to get away from this horrible truth.
The funeral was held three days later. It was a sunny day and more than 50 people were standing around the grave of forever nineteen year old Teddy Lupin. The grave was next to both of his parents, next to a big tree whose leaves had just turned green again. All in all, it was a nice spot. That's what the undertaker had said. A nice spot. James found this place rather depressing than nice. His gaze wandered over the people who attended the funeral. Most of them were his family. Teddy's family. All of the Weasleys and Potters were standing next to each other. Amongst them was Andromeda, her face tear streamed, as she was still crying. Percy and Charlie were supporting here from both sides, as she could not stand on her own. James quickly averted his eyes. On the other side were people Teddy's age, obviously his friends from school. He did not recognize all of them, but could spot a few familiar faces, people he had seen with his godbrother a few times. The Longbottoms were standing in the back, next to the Scamanders. Even Scorpius Malfoy had attended, with his parents and grandmother in tow.
James looked at the ground, sadness taking over again. This was not a nice spot, this was probably the saddest spot he had ever seen. He wished it was over, and he did not have to listen to Victoire's sobs anymore. Just looking at her hurt. Even more than looking at his own father. His dad had not said much since that day, he looked miserable, rarely ate and barely came out of his own room. This was a horrible place to be. James had never lost a person close to him before, and he didn't know how to deal with it. How could you deal with the fact, that a person you loved so dearly, who spent most of his time at your house, playing with you, talking with you, teasing you, loving you, would never ever come back again? That you would never hear his voice again, see his face again, talk about girls again, share your secrets that you didn't tell anybody else again? James felt how a few more tears falling down his cheeks, but quickly wept them away. This was not a nice spot, he decided. This was not even close.
That night, in Grimmauld Place Number 12 a little red haired girl of only eight years was kneeling in front of her bed, her hands folded neatly on her duvet and her eyes closed.
She was praying, something she had not done in a long time.
"Dear God, I know I haven't talked to you in a while., and I'm really, really sorry about that. But sometimes I'm so tired I just forget to. But I promise I will pray every night to you, if you just bring Teddy back. I will never complain to Dad about James and Al again; I'll help Mum with the dishes and…and I won't talk back to Ms. Jackson anymore. I promise I'll be good, I swear. Just bring Teddy back. He hasn't done anything bad in his life, and shouting at James because he tried to climb on the roof doesn't count, because Daddy said he could have really hurt himself. But Teddy was always nice to everyone! I promise I'll be good if you just bring him back."
Tears were streaming down her small face and she was sobbing so hard you could not understand half the things she was saying.
"I promise I'll be good."
Ginny had entered her daughter's room when she had heard her Youngest crying when she was really supposed to be in bed.
"Lily."
The girl opened her wet eyes and looked up to see her mother standing over her. She knelt down next to her daughter and stroked her long hair. "What are you doing, sweetheart?"
"I'm praying, Mum", she explained sniffing. "Maybe if I promise to be better, God will bring Teddy back."
Ginny smiled sadly and pulled her on her lap.
"It doesn't work that way, honey."
"Why not?"
The woman pressed a kiss on her hair that resembled so much her own.
"Because Teddy is already gone, Lily. He's with his parents now. I told you that."
"But couldn't his parents waited a little longer? Did God take him because I wasn't good enough?"
Ginny shook her head quickly.
"No, no, no, no, Lily. Look at me. Some things just happen. Things nobody could have seen coming. You're a good girl, Lily. This is nobody's fault."
She kissed her daughter's head one more time.
"Let's go to bed, okay? I'll stay with you tonight."
Meanwhile Al was sitting on his own bed, the dark green hoodie on his lap. He had told him a hundred times that he had forgotten it in his room; that he shouldn't accuse Al of stealing his stuff when he really knew he had left it there.
He smiled at the memory where his godbrother had messed up his already messy hair and told him if he liked that hoodie so much he could have just told him so.
He had reminded him so often to take that hoodie back. And now he never would.
Al pulled the hoodie over his head and went to sleep, the smell of his dead brother with him the whole night.
Harry Potter had lost a lot of people in his life.
First he had lost his parents when he was barely one year old; the memory of the people who had brought him to this world long gone.
After spending ten years of his life with people who truly despised him he got to live with his godfather, who finally got custody of him, only to leave his life five years later. The laugh of the man who loved him like his own son; the strong pat on the back he would always give him he could still remember like it was yesterday.
He had lost his mentor, who had taught him so much and nothing; his favourite teacher, who reminded him so much of Sirius and yet not at all, whose son would be like his own; his friend, who had made him laugh like nobody before and so many more people who had made an impact in his life.
But losing all those people had never felt like this.
He couldn't even put it in words, he hurt everywhere and felt numb at the same time.
He couldn't eat, he couldn't sleep, he kept seeing him. He kept hearing the last words he had said to him. His own godson had died arguing with him.
Harry kept reliving the moment over and over again. It was a matter of seconds; if they had been standing on the porch only a second longer; if he could have kept him inside just one more moment, Teddy would be alive and well.
Maybe he wold be with them right now. Or he would be with his girlfriend or his grandmother.
He wouldn't be buried six feet under the ground with only nineteen years old.
But he was. And it was all Harry's fault.
The house was quiet. Fleur was with Victoire in her room and Dominique and Louis had gone straight to their rooms after they had come home from the funeral.
Bill sat on the couch for a minute longer, before he turned off the TV. It wasn't like he had been watching the program anyway. He got up and made his way to the staircase to go to his own room.
Right before he made the first step he stopped, his gaze landing on something on the cupboard next to him. He stood there for a moment, his look fixed on the same spot as it had been a few weeks earlier. Slowly he made his way to the cupboard and took the picture frame from behind his wedding picture with Fleur. He had just put it there to the back behind the other pictures a few weeks ago. Had it been only a few weeks?
The picture in the frame had been taken eight years ago, maybe nine. It had been summer and the whole family had been at the Burrow to one of the famous Family Dinners in the garden.
In this picture, Bill was sitting cross-legged on the old wooden bench and across from him was young Teddy, sitting in the exact same position. Both of them were in the middle of a staring contest, deeply looking each other in the eyes. It was a game both of them used to play often when Teddy had been younger; the first one to look away losing.
Bill still remembered the day, how Hermione had taken the photo and how happy Teddy had been after winning the contest for the very first time against him. He had patted him on the back lovingly and went out with him and Victoire for ice cream the day after that to celebrate.
Bill didn't realize he was crying until he tasted the tear on his lips.
With shaky hands he placed the picture in front of the others, stroking the glass over the small figure across his younger self, before he went upstairs to his room.
Victoire just wanted to be left alone. She didn't want to speak to her brother, her sister or her mother. She didn't want to speak at all, why didn't they understand that?
The girl pulled the blanket even higher so it covered almost her whole face. Realizing Victoire wasn't going to talk, her mother left silently the room.
Shutting her eyes tighter, she pressed herself deeper into her pillows.
Sleep was all she needed. Sleep and silence. Sleep and silence and Teddy.
She needed him. She needed him more than anything right now, and he wasn't here.
He'll never be here again.
The room was silent for a few moments, only her iPod playing in the background. She had tuned it out as she had been in thoughts. But now she could hear which song was on. Tears started to fill her eyes again.
"All I know is that you're the nicest thing I've ever seen.", she sang along quietly, remembering the last time they were in his car, when she had lied in his arms and listened to this song with him.
That had been the last time she had seen him, and she couldn't even remember what the last words were that she had said to him. Had it been I love you? Goodnight? She couldn't remember. Why couldn't she remember? She shut her eyes, listening to the song one more time, and after that again, until the battery died. She let the iPod fall from her hands to the floor, the memory of last night already fading.
She cried until she couldn't cry any longer, and then a little more.
I'm never going to be happy again.