Hello. Hope everybody is enjoying 2016 so far. I apologize for my tardiness but I'm afraid 2016 is taking early shots at me. Still working to find a full-time job. Hopefully I'll get one soon. On the good side, I seem to be doing well health-wise. Although I'm having the classic middle-aged problem of the weight not coming off no matter what I try. But I'm sure you've been there.
The good news is, I managed to work in "Chuck vs. the Seduction" into this story. Of course, because of the setup of this story...mainly the world thinking Chuck and Sarah are dating...several changes had to be made. I tried my best to keep some of the best elements of that story in while integrating it with "Chuck vs. the Cougars." Hopefully you'll like the result. BTW, I did promise more Carina involvement in these chapters. Her big chapter is next while Jimmy gets the emphasis now and drops back for the second half of these two stories. But you'll understand why when you read this.
Again, thanks to everyone who has reviewed the story, and I hope you continue to do so. I will try my best to get Chapter 15 out before the end of the month. If anyone from Marvel is reading this, please take note of my not-too-subtle suggestion for who should play Captain Marvel. And I promise, you'll find out who prevented the hit on Chuck. Eventually. :-D
Enjoy!
Unknown Location
December 27, 2015
11:00 PM
He couldn't believe his luck. Her auburn hair and smoky eyes would drive any man crazy on their own. But throw in that accent and the slinky dress she wore, and he figured it was the luckiest night of his life.
And based on the fact he watched her slip out of that dress to reveal a black lace teddy which accented her tight body, he thought he was about to get a whole lot luckier. It was a very Merry Christmas as far as he was concerned.
She approached him and wrapped her arms around his neck, giving him a sensual kiss. His hands moved up and down her back. He reached for the hooks holding up her lingerie as she ran her thigh along his hip.
By the time he recognized the click of her switchblade knife, it was embedded into him. He felt her twist it hard, and he collapsed to the rug.
The woman casually wiped the knife on the man's shirt and folded it shut. She put her dress back on and got out her mobile phone. "Did you find it?"
"Yes," the man on the other end of the line said. "It was in his car. The man was not exactly an expert on security."
"Agreed. We'll clean this up, wait a week, and then we'll contact Fulcrum. We'll trade the Cipher for what we want. And then the Iranians will give us our well-deserved payoff."
"Understood, Sasha."
Washington, D.C.
January 1, 2016
3:00 AM EST
The figure moved slowly through the living room, having easily disabled the security system and dispatched of the two Secret Service agents who were lying unconscious outside the small but ornate house in the Georgetown section of D.C. After what happened two weeks ago, the intruder…clad in all-black garb complete with a balaclava over their face…wanted to make sure everyone was on the same page.
The person approached General Beckman's bedroom, walking right up to her side of the bed and ignoring her husband, who was snoring loud enough to register on the Richter Scale. The figure pulled out a gun and aimed it at the General with one hand while clamping their hand over the General's mouth with the other.
"Don't say a word," the figure said. "Don't make a single movement. Nod slowly if you understand." Beckman did as she was told. "Graham ordered Bartowski's death. Don't even attempt to deny it. And I suggest you never make the same mistake, no matter what happens with him. If you do…"
The person made a big show of cocking the gun and aiming it at her husband. Beckman's eyes went wide in fear. The figure fired…and the gun clicked.
"…then next time, the gun will be loaded. And both of you will learn that the hard way."
The figure went for the window but turned back momentarily. "This conversation NEVER occurred," they said in a menacing voice before jumping out the window. Beckman bolted from the bed and tried to see who it was, but they were long gone into the night.
San Diego, CA
April 14, 1998
3:45 PM PDT
I get knocked down, but I get up again. You're never gonna keep me down
I get knocked down, but I get up again. You're never gonna keep me down
I get knocked down, but I get up again. You're never gonna keep me down
I get knocked down, but I get up again. You're never gonna keep me down…
Jenny Burton drove home from school, the Chumbawamba tune blasting out on the radio the lone highlight of the day. Life had been that way ever since she came to James Buchanan High School just before her junior year. Her father and she had barely escaped the law in Wisconsin, and she had to endure another name change. At this point, she didn't even remember what her original name was. And truthfully, she didn't care.
She tried to keep a low profile at Buchanan High, but there were always problems, especially with those stuck-up bitches on the cheerleading squad, who wore their uniforms daily like a badge of honor, even when the school's sports teams weren't playing. Sure enough, she went by her locker at the end of the day and found the head cheerleader…or head bitch, depending on how you looked at her…talking crap about almost every other student in the school. And Jenny was often in the crosshairs of Heather Chandler's disdain, to say nothing about feeling bad for Mark Ratner, who seemed to spend as much time inside his locker as he did in his classes, thanks to the large assortment of bullies the school had.
She turned the corner to her house and stopped far away from it. She saw a dozen San Diego P.D. cars and several unmarked vehicles. There were police officers everywhere and even a few people wearing ATF windbreakers.
They found him, she thought.
She knew one day the law would catch up to them, but she had hoped she had more time. She figured once she got away from her father, she could start a new life, maybe even save up enough money to attend college and get out of the various cons her father had her help him with over the years. But she only had one option now, and going with the police wasn't it.
She waited for the police to leave with him and ran for the woods, finding the tree with the broken branches. She got on her knees and dug into the ground. She uncovered the box the was located there. Taking out a knife, she cut the tape off of the box to discover thousands of dollars of cash inside. There was also a note.
In Case of Emergency. Love You, Daddy.
She looked around. She had never been so scared in her life. She was on her own, and the only person she could rely on now was herself…
Staples Center – Los Angeles, CA
January 10, 2016
9:15 PM PST
"Oh, this is painful."
"Why did they do this to us? I don't even like basketball."
One would have thought that having courtside seats to a Lakers game, sitting mere feet away from Jack Nicholson, Dyan Cannon, Leonardo DiCaprio, Drew Barrymore, and a hundred other famous Hollywood stars would be the highlight of one's life. However, the Lakers were horrible this season, they were getting beaten by the Jazz, Kobe wasn't even playing, and few-to-none of those so-called Hollywood stars were still in the building. But the CIA needed to sell the Chuck-and-Sarah cover, so they sprung for the front-row seats to the game.
And having John Casey give them grief all night while he sat in one of the bars at the Staples Center didn't make things any better.
"The things I have to do for this job sometimes," Sarah spat as the Laker defense gave up another easy basket. She then gently grabbed Chuck's arm. "Not that being here with you isn't fun, but making these public appearances grates on me sometimes."
"I would have thought you'd be used to it by now," Chuck replied. "You're always great on the talk shows. Didn't you do that lip sync thing with Jimmy Fallon last year?"
Sarah shook her head in frustration. "Do not even get me started on that. I felt like such an idiot."
"Oh, come on. You were great. You nailed that Joan Jett song. The crowd was going crazy."
"And then Jimmy did that Elvis Presley tune and the crowd went nuts. I felt so worthless. It was bad enough he kept goading me about auditioning for that superhero movie coming out in a couple of years. Got the audience cheering for me and everything."
"Captain Marvel?" Chuck asked, to which Sarah nodded. "Well, now we have two reasons to get the Intersect out of my head. I think you'd make a great Captain Marvel. You can already do almost everything she can do anyway."
Sarah laughed. "Chuck, I'm pretty sure the CIA isn't going to let me leave the spy game just so I can play a superhero. God, I was so embarrassed that night. It was almost as bad as that Ellen appearance…"
Chuck stared in confusion. "What Ellen appearance?"
"Nothing, never mind," Sarah said quickly, having completely forgotten the reason why the Ellen interview was so bad never made it to air.
They could hear the crowd start to cheer louder and louder, which made no sense because there was a timeout on the floor.
"Did we miss something?" Sarah asked.
Chuck looked around and then he looked up at the scoreboard above the court. They were on the "Kiss Cam" and the crowd wanted to see the famous couple lock lips.
"I thought the Lakers were supposed to be 'too cool' to do that," Chuck said with not a little annoyance. The camera wouldn't move off of them and the crowd got louder.
Sarah smiled. "Let's humor them."
She pulled Chuck's face to hers and gently placed her lips on his. It took almost no time for the kiss to be less and less gentle. Chuck ran his fingers through her hair as their kiss became extremely passionate. Both of them felt electricity run through them that could light up Los Angeles for a year.
"The camera's been off of you for a good two minutes, morons," Casey ground out over their earpieces.
Chuck and Sarah broke apart and looked in wide-eyed shock. Sure enough, the game had already resumed. They avoided eye contact with each other like two overly-shy teenagers who just had their first make-out session.
"Well, I…hope that keeps the tabloids happy for a while," Chuck said nervously.
"Me too," Sarah replied with equal anxiety.
~/^\~
Chuck and Sarah joined Casey at the bar in the upper levels of the arena. They had to paste smiles on their faces as several people came up to shake their hands. The smirk on Casey's face at their discomfiture refused to go away.
"Good thing they weren't playing the Sixers. You'd have to get horizontal for the crowd to be interested," Casey said with a significant amount of snark.
"Ease up," Sarah said. "This wasn't our idea. But the more we're seen in public, the more people watch the show. The more people watch the show, the more advertising dollars we raise, and the more we have to fund our missions."
"So now you've added TV executive to your list of skills? Surprised you don't claim you can run this country better than the President."
"Yeah, big talk coming from the guy who almost got the four of us killed because he did such a horrible job seducing that bodyguard in Morocco."
"Hey, is it my fault Larkin left and Slade is a moron when it comes to women? Miller would have had a better shot at seducing that guard, even if she doesn't swing that way."
Sarah rolled her eyes in annoyance and looked out over the crowd. "Possible bogey at 10 o'clock," she said, her mood turning serious.
Casey took a quick glance. "You sure?"
Sarah nodded. "I spotted her twice already tonight and she never approached like a fan would."
Casey surreptitiously pulled out his Glock and kept it under the table. "Get the asset out of here."
Sarah stood and took Chuck's hand, heading for the exit. The woman spotted Sarah and walked right up to her. Casey rose slowly and kept a sharp eye out on the three.
"I know you," the woman said.
Sarah chuckled. "A lot of people know me. That's what I get for being on a TV show."
"No, I mean I remember you. You're Jenny Burton!"
Chuck's eyes went wide. He didn't know what was going on.
"We used to go to high school together!" the woman exclaimed. "Heather Chandler! James Buchanan High class of '98? Go Cougars!"
Sarah put the pieces together. And the images of the stuck-up Heather in her cheerleader outfit filled her with considerable anger.
"So Sarah Walker? That's, like, your Hollywood name? That is so cool! You look so different. For the better, of course. And is this your boyfriend?"
Chuck shook off the shock and smiled broadly. "Yes, yes I am. Charles Carmichael. So glad to meet you," Chuck said, shaking Heather's hand. "So…Jenny Burton and Heather Chandler?"
"Heather Ratner, actually," she replied. "I married Mark Ratner." She turned to Sarah. "You remember him, right?"
Sarah could also remember Mark being shoved inside his locker. This didn't feel right. One of the sweetest students she remembered marrying the nastiest bitch in San Diego?
"Mark, come over here! It's Jenny Burton!"
Mark walked up to the three. "Jenny, it's good to see you again. You look…so great."
Sarah turned to Chuck, hoping he could help her get out of this but he was momentarily frozen. Sarah winced inside; Chuck must have flashed on Mark.
"So, are you going to the big reunion in San Diego next weekend? I imagine you don't get to see your dad much."
"We can't," Sarah said, not exactly liking Heather pouring salt into an old wound concerning her father. "I'm not really a reunion person…"
"…of course we'll be there!" Chuck interrupted with a big smile.
"Chuck, you don't want to do that. I think it would be boring for you to take a trip down memory lane with us," Sarah replied, trying to keep the acidity out of her voice even though she was ready to kill him.
"Good God, no! Not at all. I can't think of anything I'd rather do then spend an evening learning all about…my Jenny."
"Okay!" Heather said excitedly. "We will see you there!"
Chuck and Sarah watched Heather and Mark leave. Casey joined them.
"What the hell were you thinking, Chuck?" Sarah hissed at him.
"What was I supposed to do? I flashed on the guy. He's a design engineer for a major aeronautics contractor. I thought you'd appreciate me taking a little initiative. And by the way, what is going on with your name? Your character is named for the person you were in high school? I'm totally confused here."
Sarah grabbed his wrist out of sight and twisted it backwards. "That is from my past. A past you have NO business poking around in!" she growled at him.
"Easy Walker," Casey said, prompting Sarah to let go of Chuck's wrist. "Don't kill the messenger. Not Bartowski's fault you went to high school with a treasonous scumbag.
All three of their phones beeped a message. "This will have to go on the back burner for now," Casey said as he looked at the text. "Beckman wants us back at the hotel. Looks like Miller's and Slade's homework paid off about the Cipher."
The three quickly left the arena.
Hotel Amarano - Burbank, CA
January 10, 2016
10:30 PM PST
"The good news is, Fulcrum doesn't have the Cipher anymore," Carina said to start the meeting. "The bad news is, Jimmy and I found out that it was stolen from one of their low-level idiots. They found his body in a hotel in Houston."
"The really bad news is, based on the evidence the NSA team found in the hotel, the Cipher is in the hands of Sasha Banacheck," Jimmy continued. "She's an ex-KGB operative who is looking to sell the item. Unfortunately, we don't know where or when. But based on some transfers between accounts Banacheck owns and banks that are fronts for the Iranian government, we think she's going to trade back the Cipher to Fulcrum for a significantly higher price."
"If she's got it, we just have to grab her and find out where she hid it," Casey said.
General Beckman's image came up on the screen. "That won't work. Sasha Banacheck was in a Bulgarian prison for seven years. They got nothing out of her. The good news is one agent was able to get close. That's why she stayed off the radar for so long. But her money must be running out for her to make a dangerous play like this. Fortunately, this agent knows more about her than anyone alive."
"Who?"
"That agent is Roan Montgomery."
Casey quietly growled at the name and Jimmy shook his head in frustration.
"The guy hates me," Casey muttered. "My supervisor in operative training. Flunked me twice. Made my life hell on the show, too."
Sarah looked in Casey's direction and smiled. Payback was indeed a bitch.
"He's off the grid now. Use the Intersect to find him," Beckman said before signing off.
"Seriously, is that all I'm good for around here?" Chuck asked in irritation. 'Use the Intersect. Flash, Chuck. Tell us where he is.' Does Beckman even know my name?"
"Knows it? Sure," Casey replied. "Gives a rat's ass? Not likely."
"Chuck, look at it this way," Sarah replied, taking an evil glance at Casey. "The sooner we find Roan, the faster we can get to the Cipher and the faster you can get back to the life you want."
Chuck sighed. Sarah had a point. "Is there a file on him?"
Carina handed Chuck a folder, which he opened. On the very first page was a picture of Roan Montgomery. He did flash, seeing pictures of Roan in many different outfits, including swimsuits even supermodels shouldn't wear. He also saw mansions, an address, and women. Lots and lots of beautiful, scantily-clad women.
"He's in Palm Springs," he finally said. "And he's got a lot of lady friends."
"OK," Sarah replied. "We'll get him tomorrow. Let's reconvene here at 0800 hours."
Casey, Carina, and Jimmy left the conference room and Sarah walked over to her room. Chuck followed Sarah and knocked on her door.
"What is it?" she asked.
"Well, I thought before I left, if you had a few minutes, we could cover a few stats for our undercover mission in San Diego next weekend."
"Chuck…"
He walked in her room and sat on her bed. "No big deal if you don't have a full dossier workup on your classmates. We just need to be on the same page with the briefest of facts."
He pulled out a pencil and a small notepad. "I'll go first. I'll be playing the role of Jenny's boyfriend, Chuck. Used to work at a Buy More before getting a job as a technical consultant on Jen Burton: Spy Girl. Sister is Ellie, doctor, engaged to a doctor. There, all up to speed on Jenny's boyfriend." He flipped the pad open. "Your turn."
Sarah glared at him. "I'm not doing this."
"OK, here's what we know thus far. Jenny Burton went to James Buchanan High School in San Diego, California. Class of 1998. Is Jenny a diminutive of 'Jennifer'? And why the name change? Was that your idea or a Hollywood producer's idea…"
"Back off, Chuck. You have as much information as you need."
Chuck paused. "So is that Jenny with a 'y' or an 'i'…"
Sarah grabbed the pencil. "All Jenny's boyfriend needs to know is that Jenny hates questions about her past."
She took the pencil and threw it at a picture of the two of them. The pencil cracked the glass, landing right between Chuck's eyes.
"You got that?" she hissed.
Chuck looked at the picture in complete mortification. "I'm good. Yeah, I'm good." He quickly went to the door and exited. He could hear Sarah angrily lock the door behind him.
"How did she do that?" he whispered to himself.
Palm Springs, CA
January 11, 2016
9:30 AM PST
The team drove up to a well-to-do house on Palm Canyon Drive and exited the SUV.
"So, what's the deal with this Roan guy?" Chuck asked. "He was a spy? He was on the show before all of you?"
"He's a legend in the department," Sarah replied. "An incredible spy. A real old-school James Bond type."
"Ahh, the memories," Carina reminisced. "I used to watch the show when I was a kid. In fact, he was the first guy I…"
"Overrated if you ask me," Casey ground out before Carina could gross him out.
"What was the class that you failed?" Sarah asked.
"Infiltration and Inducement of Enemy Personnel."
Sarah turned to Chuck. "Yeah, in the Academy, we called it Seduction School."
"Yeah, like I need a class," Casey huffed.
Chuck turned to Jimmy. "And he was supposed to train you but blew it off?"
"Yeah," Jimmy replied in a deep funk.
"I kept offering to go through the entire class with him," Carina said with a flirtatious lilt.
"They don't make condoms strong enough for you to do that," Casey quipped.
They got to the door, which was ajar. "Somebody's already been here," Casey said as he pulled out his gun. Jimmy pulled Chuck behind him as Casey kicked the door open. Sarah and Carina immediately entered, pointing their guns in opposite directions to cover the room.
"They ransacked the place," Sarah said as Carina and she moved carefully forward. Casey and Jimmy covered their backs and kept an eye on Chuck. They moved towards the bedroom, where a pair of legs stuck out from underneath the bed.
"Stay here, Chuck," Jimmy said as Sarah, Casey and Carina approached the bed. Casey waited until Sarah and Carina were ready and then lifted the corner of the mattress.
Roan was underneath the bed with a bottle of gin in his hand…snoring loudly. And looking significantly older than his picture.
Chuck entered and stared in shock at Roan passed out under his bed. "This is the guy who's supposed to help us? I'm going to be the Intersect forever!"
Hotel Amarano - Burbank, CA
January 11, 2016
11:00 AM PST
This had the makings of a bad day. Roan was passed out on Sarah's bed. Jimmy hauled him to the SUV while Sarah and Carina gathered a suitcase of clothes for Roan to wear. And General Beckman didn't look particularly happy.
"I don't understand," Beckman said. "Did you find Agent Montgomery?"
"We did," Sarah replied. "It's just he's having a bit of trouble remaining…upright."
"We tried everything," Casey continued. "Water, aspirin. The guy's out. Bottom line, if we want Sasha Banacheck, it's up to us. I suggest going old-school. Torture it out of her."
"Torture will never work."
Everybody turned to see Roan Montgomery enter the room dressed in a very sharp suit and looking at least fifteen years younger than he did when he was passed out under his bed. A goofy smile came to Sarah's face, and General Beckman fixed her hair upon seeing him on the monitor.
"Hello, Diane," Roan purred.
Jimmy leaned towards Carina. "Is Beckman actually blushing?" He then glanced at her. "Are YOU actually blushing?"
"Hello, Roan," Beckman replied, trying to keep her excitement out of seeing him…and failing.
Roan turned to the team. "The only way to get Sasha Banacheck is to seduce her."
Casey straightened up to his full height. "Well, duty calls."
"Not you, Agent Frankenstein," Roan quickly retorted.
"Especially not after Morocco," Sarah added.
"We need someone more innocuous," Roan continued. "Someone with whom she can let her guard down. Essentially the last person in the world she would ever suspect of being an agent."
Casey turned towards Chuck. "Uh, not that I'm not flattered to being considered innocuous, but the world thinks I'm dating Sarah," Chuck said. "How could I get away with seducing another woman?"
"Quite right, Agent Bartowski. Fortunately, we have one more candidate. And he is not attached to anybody."
Everybody in the room turned to look at Jimmy. He looked at them in momentary confusion before it kicked in.
"Aaah hell," he moaned, dropping into the chair behind him and burying his face in his hands.
"Agent Montgomery is right," Beckman said. "You're perfect for the job, Agent Slade. You're unattached, you're attractive, and the world knows you as an actor with a role in an action comedy. There's no way Banacheck would ever think you're a real spy. Let's get to work, people." The screen shut off.
"This is ridiculous," Jimmy said quietly without looking up. "I have never done anything like this before."
"Not to worry, Agent Slade," Roan said with considerable self-assuredness. "I'll teach you everything you need to know."
"Yeah, and where was that eight years ago when you were supposed to train me?"
"Eight years ago?" Roan thought for a moment before a smile came to his face. "Oh, right. Bermuda. That lovely brunette from the Australian SAS." Roan reminisced for a moment before returning to the present. "You've been with a few women here and there. I can up your game."
"Um, Roan?" Sarah quietly eked out.
Roan looked at the pained expression on Sarah's face. He then figured it out. "You've got to be kidding. Not even once?" Sarah shook her head sadly while Chuck, Casey and Carina tried not to grin. "Good Lord, this will be harder than I thought."
"That's it," Jimmy said angrily, pushing himself up and walking towards the door. "Call me when you need someone to retake a town controlled by ISIS or leap off the Sears Tower."
"Isn't it called the Willis Tower now?" Chuck asked.
"Shut up!" Jimmy threw open the door and stalked out.
Sarah was beyond pissed off now. This bad day got much worse for no good reason. She bolted out of the room and went over to the elevators where Jimmy was waiting to go downstairs.
"Hey! Get over here!"
She grabbed Jimmy by his ear and dragged him to her hotel room, pulling him towards the bed and slamming the door behind them.
"Enough of this!" Sarah yelled at him, her blood pressure ringing the bell. "I am sick and tired of you acting like you don't know how to be a spy! It's ridiculous! We need the Cipher back, and this is the only way to do it! There are a lot of things I never did before becoming a spy but I still did them because they were important! Do you want Chuck to have to keep the Intersect the rest of his life and go through what you went through just so you avoid having to do something you've never done before?"
Jimmy sunk back on the bed and his head dropped in complete shame. Sarah sat down next to him. "Look, this is what we do. We help each other. If one of us gets in trouble, the other three always have their back. We're the best team of spies the government has and you're a big reason why. Did you forget when you and Casey charged that al Qaeda compound by yourselves to rescue those civilians? Or when you got Carina away from that separatist group? And I can't even count the number of times you saved me, including that guest appearance on Ellen!"
A tiny smile came to Jimmy's face. "Yeah, freeing Carina and helping Casey were definitely easier than bailing you out on that show."
Sarah grinned and put an arm around him. "That's my point, Jimmy. Maybe you've never had a seduction mission before, but you have the looks, the personality, and the best teacher in the business to help you. You'll get what we need from Sasha Banacheck. You've helped us out more than we could ever know. This time, we're going to be there for you."
Jimmy turned towards Sarah and gave her an odd glance. "This is starting to sound like a really bad episode of Friends."
Sarah laughed heartily. "How you doin'?" she said in a horribly-botched imitation of Joey Tribbiani, which still made Jimmy laugh.
"Come on," she said as she gave him a little kiss and got up from the bed. "We have work to do."
"OK, boss," Jimmy replied as the two returned to the conference room. Casey and Carina were gone.
"Casey and Carina went to track down where we can find Sasha Banacheck," Chuck said.
"Are we ready to go?" Roan asked. Both Sarah and Jimmy nodded. "Make sure he's going with plenty of protection."
"Is it REALLY going to go that far?" Jimmy asked in irritation.
"That won't be a problem," Sarah sharply replied. "Jimmy might be inexperienced in romance but he's one of the best when it comes to combat."
"Good," Roan replied. "Do you know why she's called the Black Widow?"
"Because…she's African-American and her husband died?" Chuck asked hopefully.
"She kills all of her mates."
"Terrific," Jimmy lamented. "I'm going to be eaten alive by the Black Widow…and not in the good way."
"Not to worry, Agent Slade," Roan replied. "You just need to get invited up to her room. Let's start with Lesson #1: the proper way to drink a martini."
He grabbed the martini he had prepared and handed a second one to Jimmy. "Hold by the stem. Nod to mark." Roan held his martini by the stem and nodded towards Sarah. Jimmy followed suit. "Then, slowly tilt back."
Roan drained his martini while Jimmy sipped at his. "A moment to learn…a lifetime to perfect," Roan said.
Chuck shook his head. "His liver must look like camouflage!" he whispered to Sarah.
"Come on," Sarah said, ignoring Chuck's quip. "Let's keep going."
Hotel Amarano - Burbank, CA
January 12, 2016
7:30 PM PST
The team got lucky: Sasha Banacheck was in town and staying at a downtown hotel. They weren't sure if she had already unloaded the Cipher, but tonight was the night to find out. Casey readied the weapons and went down to the very large surveillance van they would need for the evening, as the entire team would monitor Jimmy from there. Carina managed to procure a Lamborghini for Jimmy's use by charming the right Beverly Hills car salesman. Chuck and Sarah went over some last-minute details with Roan.
"If he pulls this off, it'll be a miracle," Roan said quietly as he looked towards the bathroom where Jimmy was getting dressed.
"Why must you constantly question him?" Sarah asked, beginning to tire of Roan's commentary.
"It's difficult to be optimistic about someone who has less sexual experience than a high schooler the week before their prom."
"He'll be fine. Improvisation is one of his best traits."
"Really? Has he even kissed a woman?"
"Of course he has!"
"Not counting you and Agent Miller for the show?"
"Oh," Sarah said, looking at the ground. "But both of us agree he's a great kisser."
"I read the file on Agent Miller. That woman would mount a meat grinder if she could find the zipper."
"Enough already," Sarah hissed. "I'm going to check on Jimmy."
Sarah started to go to the bathroom door but Chuck stopped her.
"Are you OK?" he said softly so Roan wouldn't hear.
Sarah exhaled in frustration. "We're on a potentially dangerous mission, and I have Roan questioning a member of my team. It's bad enough Jimmy's already questioning himself. And insulting Carina like that for no reason?"
"It'll be fine. Like you told him, all of us will be there. He can take care of himself. Plus, you've got the master of seduction with you. And Roan's coming with us as well."
Sarah laughed and put an arm around Chuck. "Oh, you're the master of seduction?"
"You haven't seen me put the moves on you." Chuck pretended to fire guns at Sarah and gave her an eyebrow dance. She couldn't stop laughing.
"OK, frustration cured," she said with a smile, giving Chuck a quick kiss. She continued to the bathroom as Chuck returned to Roan.
"I get the feeling there's more to the two of you than an asset and his protector," Roan said.
"What?" Chuck cleared his throat a couple of times and nervously shifted back and forth. "No, it's nothing. We're…just friendly towards each other."
"Not to worry, Charles. After we finish with this assignment, we'll get Agent Walker out of her shell."
"Jimmy, are you ready?" Sarah called to him from the bathroom door.
Jimmy walked out in an Armani midnight blue suit wearing a white Oxford shirt and a striped tie. His hair looked like it was styled by the best hairdressers in Hollywood. And unlike his normal shy stance, he walked confidently with his eyes up and looking forward. Chuck stared in complete surprise and Sarah had the same look on her face a proud parent would at seeing their child graduate college. Even Roan looked impressed.
"There's hope for him yet," he said quietly to himself.
Jimmy took a few steps into the bedroom area and then suddenly looked back and forth.
"What's up?" Chuck asked
Jimmy was confused. "I swear I felt a fan blowing on me just now. That was weird."
Omni Hotel at California Plaza – Los Angeles, CA
January 12, 2016
8:45 PM PST
Jimmy pulled up to the hotel and a valet opened the door to the Lamborghini. Jimmy handed him a hundred-dollar bill.
"Keep it safe," he told the valet as he walked into the hotel. He tried to hide his nervousness at seeing every pair of eyes on him. It wouldn't have been the first time that had happened to him, but typically either Sarah or Carina was with him and the focus was always on them instead of him.
Casey parked the van in the underground basement across the street. Chuck, Sarah, Carina, and Roan sat in the back of the van as Chuck and Casey activated the surveillance equipment.
"Microphone check, Jimmy?" Carina asked.
"Copy," he said nervously.
"You'll do fine," Sarah reassured him. "Just be yourself."
"I thought we had already established that would be a stupid thing to do."
"You play a spy on TV, Agent Slade," Roan chimed in. "Use that persona. Be Lance McCall."
"You mean do death-defying stunts and crack one-liners?"
"Enough, Jimmy," Sarah snarled.
Jimmy exhaled in frustration. "Let me get to the bar and we'll play it out."
"Relax," Roan said. "I'll take you through the world-famous, four-pronged Montgomery attack. First, work the room."
Jimmy entered the bar, keeping his eyes looking forward, and surveyed the room. A couple of twentysomething women came up to him screaming and waving autograph pads at him. He quickly signed them to send them on their way.
"Hey, not a bad idea to send those girls my way," Jimmy said. "That should raise an eyebrow with Banacheck."
"Uh, that wasn't part of the plan," Carina said.
"Oops."
"No problem. Just keep moving, Slade," Roan said over his microphone. "Remember, when you enter a bar, every eye should be on you. You could leave the bar with any woman you desire, but you have chosen her."
Jimmy made his way over to the couch where Sasha Banacheck was seated.
"Next, she'll need to be well-lubricated," Roan told him. "Ice-cold dirty martini…three olives."
"Is this seat taken?" Jimmy asked her but got silence in response. "I'll take that as a no." He sat down on the couch opposite from her. "Care for a drink?"
A server came up to him. "Two dirty martinis, please. Three olives in each," Jimmy told him. "Jimmy Slade, very nice to meet you. And you are?"
"Bored," Sasha replied tiredly. "Thank you for the martini, but I no longer drink." She got up and walked to the bar.
Everyone in the van looked at each other in surprise. "Doesn't drink?" Roan asked incredulously. How is Slade supposed to seduce her without alcohol?"
"He"ll be OK, Roan," Sarah replied angrily.
"Slade doesn't even think he can seduce someone!"
"Could we get out of my ear, please?" Jimmy said quietly, turning his head away from the bar.
"Enough, you two," Casey ground out. "We still need to get Slade upstairs to her room."
Roan exhaled. "OK. Slade, approach her at the bar. Third prong, the woman is an absolute Francophile. Just the mention of St. Tropez makes her woozy."
Jimmy nodded and walked to the bar, standing next to Sasha. "I hate to keep bothering you but I keep thinking I saw you last spring. St. Tropez, perhaps? Leonardo DiCaprio was having a little fashion show for charity down there? I modeled a couple of suits. Nice guy, Leo. I think the Oscar is finally his."
Sasha glanced to her right and waved off the two bodyguards who looked ready to pounce on Jimmy.
"At the Intercontinental," Roan added.
"I was staying at the Intercontinental while I was there," Jimmy told Sasha, who suddenly was interested.
"Antoine, the piano player, is the best in Europe, don't you agree?"
Jimmy nodded. "Completely. Chopin, Beethoven, Mozart, the man can play anything."
"Antoine has been dead for six years."
Jimmy's eyes widened. "Goddammit," his whispered harshly behind his drink.
"Oh, poor Antoine," Roan said sadly as Sarah typed feverishly into the computer to do a search. "That's tragic."
"Oh, I had not heard that," Jimmy said. "I figured I just missed him there last time. No one ever told me."
Sarah quickly got on the microphone. "But you prefer the new piano player, Marcel."
"Antoine was great, but I think I prefer Marcel," Jimmy said. "I mean, the man could take a Justin Bieber song and make it sound like Rachmaninoff."
Sasha regarded him for a minute. "I have to agree." She raised her class. "To Antoine."
"May he rest in peace," Jimmy replied, clinking glasses with Sasha.
Sasha downed her drink. "Have a lovely evening, Mr. Slade," she said as she got up and walked away.
Jimmy turned to the bar and exhaled in frustration. "Yeah, that worked really well."
"Nice work, Casanova," Casey said and then turned to Chuck. "Hope you enjoy having the Intersect in your head for the rest of your life."
Jimmy slammed his fist on the bar. "Roan, what's the fourth prong of attack?"
"Forget it, Slade," Roan replied. "The mission's over. This is getting too dangerous."
"No!" Jimmy was livid. "I spent the last two days getting yelled at about doing this mission and taking every last dig at my lack of experience. And now you want to pull the plug? Bullshit! I'm finishing this! Now what's the last goddamn prong?"
"Be a bastard," Roan replied.
Jimmy huffed in exacerbation. "How about that for an irony."
He stalked out of the bar and headed towards the elevators. "Hey, lady!"
"Yes, Mr. Slade?" she replied dismissively without stopping.
"You're a fool, do you know that?"
"Excuse me?"
"No, I don't think I will!" Sasha continued to walk, and Jimmy matched her stride for stride. "Perhaps you haven't noticed, but I'm one of the most famous actors in this country with a role on one of the most popular TV shows in the world! I could have had any woman that I wanted in there tonight, and any one of them would have done things to me that would make a hooker blush! And yet I went up to you. And you know what? Here's the worst part for you. You'll go upstairs to your room and go to sleep and one little thought will creep into your mind just before you drift off. That you missed the opportunity to have an incredible night with the greatest lover you'll ever know!"
"And who might that be?" Sasha replied in full skepticism.
"You're looking at him, sister," Jimmy replied, his eyes steeled on hers. "A man who has been all over the world and pleasured women of every race, creed, and culture. A man who would give you dreams that would last the rest of your life and would take you on his private jet to enjoy the sunny warmth of Fiji at the drop of a hat. So I'll give you one final chance before I board my private jet with half of the Dallas Cowboys cheerleading squad. Can I buy you a club soda?"
Sasha looked at him for a moment. "No, thank you." Jimmy was ready to turn away when Sasha stepped closer to him. "But you can take me upstairs to my room and make mad, passionate sex to me."
Jimmy gave a slight smile and got on the elevator with Sasha.
In the van, Roan leaned back and drained his fifth martini of the night. "I still got it."
~/^\~
Jimmy and Sasha exited the elevator in a full-on lip lock. They made their way to Sasha's room. They broke the kiss as she opened the door.
"Make yourself a drink, Mr. Slade," Sasha purred. "I'm going to slip into something…a little more comfortable."
"Be my guest," Jimmy replied with a small amount of the attitude that got him into the room in the first place. He watched her retreat into the bedroom.
"Chuck, have you flashed on anything?" Jimmy whispered.
"Keep walking around the room," Chuck replied. Jimmy turned so the camera hidden in his breast pocket saw every inch of Sasha's room, opening cabinets and drawers in the process. "Nothing, sorry."
"OK, file download."
Jimmy quickly went over to Sasha's laptop and inserted a USB drive to copy all of her files and transmit them to the van. Chuck and Carina looked over all of the information. The USB drive then quietly beeped, indicating the downloading program was done. Jimmy removed the drive and went to the door. Unfortunately, Sasha's bodyguards were right outside.
"Uh, gentlemen. Good work," Jimmy said. "Keep the area secure. Ms. Banacheck and I are going to be busy for a while. If we need you…then I'm doing something very wrong."
Jimmy closed the door and returned to the couch, trying to look relaxed. Sasha returned wearing a leopard-print teddy.
"There you are," she said. Jimmy slowly stood. Sasha wrapped her arms around him and began to kiss him. Jimmy began to reciprocate. Sasha reached down to undo Jimmy's belt and began to kiss along his neck.
"Think I don't know your four-pronged approach…Roan?" she whispered in Jimmy's ear.
Everybody's eyes widened, including Jimmy's. He pulled back to see a large knife in Sasha's hand. She lunged at him but he grabbed her wrist and twisted hard, knocking her back with a kick to the mid-section in the process. She dropped the knife and fell to the ground.
"Idi Syuda (Get in here)!" she shouted.
"Slade, go to the balcony!" Casey yelled as Sasha's bodyguards broke through the door. "Jump!"
Jimmy threw the doors open and leaped off of the balcony as Sasha's bodyguards opened fire. He fell fourteen stories into the outdoor pool. He surfaced and breathed a sigh of relief. Sarah immediately went to the driver's seat of the van to bring the van around to that side of the hotel.
"Nice work, Case," Carina said. "Good thing you knew about the pool."
Casey looked back and forth. "I didn't know there was a pool down there."
The van pulled up and Chuck opened the side door. Jimmy looked ready to kill every single person in the van.
"Nobody…say…a goddamn…word," he growled through clenched teeth only an orthodontist could separate.
He collapsed onto the floor of the van. Everybody looked at him.
"Bravo, Agent Slade," Roan said. "Your mission was a success."
Jimmy slowly turned his head to Roan and gestured at his waterlogged clothes. "You think THIS was a success!?"
"You're alive and got the intel, didn't you?"
Sarah reached down and gently massaged Jimmy's shoulders. "You did great."
"Even better, look at what we found," Carina said and Chuck and she looked at Sasha's files. "There's a document here with a set of numbers on it. These ones here look like map coordinates."
She then pointed to a second number: 1453009500, "I don't know what that is."
Chuck looked at the number. "I know what it is. If the first set of numbers are map coordinates, this number could be the date and time. Computers assign a number to every second of the day dating back to 1970."
He did some quick calculations. "If this is GMT, it would be Sunday at 5:45 AM."
"Which would be 9:45 PM on Saturday night in L.A.," Sarah replied.
"So we now know when. And the map coordinates…" Carina began as she entered them into the computer. She then tried to suppress a smile when the location came up on the computer. "Uh, Sarah? You're not going to like this."
"What?" Sarah asked in curiosity as she looked at the monitor. She then exhaled a long and very angry sigh. "To quote Jimmy, aaah hell."
Chuck grinned. "Looks like we're going to your reunion after all."