A/N: I'm finally back in action! Sorry for making you wait so long for my lazy ass, but I swear I'll start getting on the writing grind all over again from today onward! I moved house, got some new kitties, named 'em after Voltron characters... it's been a roller coaster. But more appropriately, I've just been unmotivated.

But now that that's all out of the way, let's get back to the chapter!

Pink.

Dan couldn't stop staring at it. He had never felt this way about anything before. He wasn't afraid. Just extremely curious, to a point that his mind had become completely clouded. He looked like a cat to a faucet or a dog to it's reflection. Completely and utterly fascinated.

Phil was scheduled to visit today, or at least that's what he said last time they had talked. Time had been blurring together a lot lately, it didn't even feel like he was living anymore. They had been texting a lot, being that Phil hadn't had the energy to move out of the house lately. Dan didn't really care all that much, but that didn't change the fact that he was lonely. So incredibly lonely.

No matter how many times he tried to get his mind off the tattoo, not even the endless amount of support from their communities could prevent it from penetrating his thoughts. Love could mean a lot of things really. Love could be platonic or romantic. Love could be a deep care for someone close to you. Love could be your soulmate, or best mate at that. But some little voice in the back of his head told Dan that love in this circumstance meant all of the above.

His injuries had been getting better. The nurses assigned to take care of him kept saying that he would be "out and better than ever any day now," a thought that still failed to bring back his dimpled smile. The only things that kept him sane these days were the plans he made for when he got out of bed again. He be able to update their fan base on what had REALLY happened to him, release videos on his normal bi-monthly schedule, and then everything would be right as rain. Or at least he hoped so.

He thought back again to what had gotten him here in the first place. That damn tattoo. He never wanted to see it again, never wanted to speak of it or even mention it for the rest of his days. But it's not like he had a choice. The aura from around the symbol seemed to draw him towards it, forcing him to think about it day and night as it slowly, internally, tore him to shreds. Everything around him seemed to fade into black as he stared at it day after day, the sight driving him half to insanity.

What did it mean?

But it didn't have to be that way. He knew very well that the constant changing of the tattoo had to mean the event was soon upon them. The climax of both Phil and his stories' were upon them, leaving them to count down the days until something that could change their whole lives for the better or worse. He did have hope though. After all, lighter colors signified the good things in life, and pink was certainly a bright color. If all remained according to plan, then everything in the lives of Dan and Phil might just get a little bit sweeter. Or at least he hoped.

Dan's thoughts drifted away for a moment into a different section of his mind: one specially reserved for Phil. Phil had been an important part of Dan's life, quite possibly the most important, for almost a decade now. He meant the world to him, and would do anything to keep him safe and happy. Phil was his sunshine. His endless sunshine. And he had come the closest to putting out that light.

"He must feel so guilty." Dan thought to himself, a horrified expression trailing it's way across his cheeks.

Phil shouldn't have to hold himself accountable for Dan's stupid actions. An argument, especially as light as one as they had had, didn't deserve the sort of reaction he had left his friend with. He had walked out that door with no regard for his friend's feelings. And he felt terrible about it. The curly haired man slid down in his covers, allowing tears to silently stream down his pale face. The way his body hurt was nothing compared to what he felt inside.

Voices called out in his mind from all different angles, only causing more tears to fall onto his steril white sheets.

Useless

Meaningless

Burden

Forgettable

The words are what he feared the most. Lost in his own thoughts, Phil appeared in front of him. The same insults screamed at him over and over, the time through his mouth. Dan's heart broke in two. He felt broken. His stained glass pane of a life was shattered on the ground before him, tears trickling around the edges. Void replaced the sunshine and darkness replaced the light. He knew he was still in the hospital, but he was in his own little world. Floating in his mind like an astronaut in space. But he had lost his helmet.

Forgetting where he was for a moment, he reached his right arm up to touch his face. He instantly regretted it. He unconsciously screamed out in agony, the inky landscape fading away. He was back in his bed, pools of sadness now soaking the sheets below him. He looked around cautiously, trying to come up with some sort of excuse as to why he was in his current condition. After all, he was supposed to be getting better. What was he supposed to tell everyone when they found out he wasn't?

Surprisingly enough, after waiting nervously for someone to check up on him, nobody came. Maybe he really was just a screw up. So unimportant to the universe that not even a nurse could bother to care. A deep sigh escaped his lips. He closed his again, opening them soon after. He was again back in the only land, gliding through the water-like substance. The action felt almost calming, distracting him briefly from the horrors of the real world. Maybe he could just stay here forever. A place with no tattoos, no cares, no work. Maybe this could be his new reality.

It almost felt like a dream. A place where problems didn't exist, no injuries, no pain. But yet, Dan still felt like screaming. He wanted everything to be back to normal. He wanted to see Phil. He wanted to see his fans. The more he thought about what he had lost, the more empty he felt. Suddenly, his breathing began to quicken. The voices in his head returned, the banshees and sirens screeching loud enough to make his ears ring.

Worthless

Worthless

Worthless

Dan was shaking wildly, tears starting to unconsciously fall.

Useless

Useless

Useless

Dan turned onto his side and started whimpering, praying for the voices to leave him alone.

"DAN!"

"DAN!"

He could recognize the voice but he didn't know from where. Where was that voice coming from? The void of his mindscape gave no answer.

"DAN! Please wake up. Please please please."

The curls on his head perked up with confusion, same as himself. Who was talking to him? Was he even real?

He could hear crying.

Suddenly, Dan gasped deeply and his eyes flew open. He was back to reality. The inky landscape dissolved once more, leaving him to his cold and emotionless hospital room. Well, almost. As he looked around his room, he heard the same voice he had heard before, but now he could identify it.

Phil.

His best friend was kneeling by his bedside, small incomprehensible whispers coming from him. The sheets all around him were drenched in salty tears, more still falling from his beautiful, glassy eyes. Only half of them were his own. Dan was about to reach over to shake him, but stopped himself. He had caused this man pain. The man of his dreams, his best mate, his soulmate, his true love…. was crying over him.

He didn't even deserve any of this to begin with.

Without thinking, he let out a sigh, causing Phil to poke his head up from the cradle he had created with his arms.

Phil's eyes lit up like fairy lights, launching himself at Dan softly. He hugged him close to his chest, careful to avoid the casts surrounding his friend's limbs. Tears still poured from his eyes, making his cheeks sparkle in the dull LED light. Dan didn't dare to move, scared he would ruin such an intimate moment by doing so. The two simply laid there for a while, moments blurring together for who knows how long. Time seemed to simultaneously speed up and slow down, the tears drying up on both of their faces. Dan felt at peace.

Suddenly, Phil began to pull away. Dan couldn't help but be disappointed from the break of contact. After all, Phil was a good cuddler.

"Why did you leave me Dan?"

Phil's voice sounded so innocent and pure, it caught Dan completely off guard. He tilted his head off to the side in confusion before responding.

"What do you mean? I'm right here!"

Phil looked surprised all the sudden, his eyes going wide as a deer in headlights. "You seriously don't know?" Dan nodded his head, suddenly becoming very worried. He started to shake slightly, the weight of the situation certainly not seeming to be as minor as he had first assumed.

"Dan, you've been out for the whole week."

Dan froze. His world seemed to turn upside down.

But everything seemed so real?

He didn't know what to say. Was he supposed to comfort Phil? But what would he even say? There wasn't really anything that he could say to Phil to make him feel better. He could only sit there helplessly as his friend looked at him in awe, amazed that his friend had cheated death for the second time in the last month.

"You've really gotta stop doing this Dan. I thought I lost you twice this month man, and that is WAY too many times for my lifetime. Buuuut, there is some good news to come from all this hullabaloo. While you will still have to be in the casts, and have a certain little someone named Phil take care of you for a few months, you can go home tomorrow! I guess laying comatose while you recover does have its perks!"

Phil's smile glimmered like the sun, causing Dan to instinctively flash him a grin with the same happiness. He felt at home with Phil, like a constant warm hug from a person wearing a soft fuzzy sweater. The feeling was like being cuddled by a million puppies under the setting sun. Golden rays would shine over his lightly tanned skin as his curls bounced up and down in the wind, calm settling over the environment.

Now imagine that feeling.

And multiply it by fifty.

"Well isn't that just swell! Now I can have the joy of updating all our crazy fangirls over the fact that my videos with be clouded with a giant blue cast for a couple months." Dan shot back gently, a smirk dancing across his face as he laced the sentence with sarcasm. It felt good to be his old self again.

His friend's laugh filled the room, making it feel a step closer to not feeling like the prison it really was. One more day and it would all be over and done with. One more day.

Suddenly, the raven haired boy's laugh turned to a light chuckle, before coming to a full abrupt stop. A look of worry replaced his joy, the change causing an identical expression to settle upon the face of the other.

"You remember what got us here in the first place right?"

Dan only nodded his head in response, knowing exactly what was coming next. "Well, there's been a couple more changes lately, so I'm guessing yours has changed as well?" Another nod. "I still don't know if we should make this whole matter completely public, but I'll do whatever it takes to make sure you never get hurt again Dan. I can't lose you again."

Phil gently stretched his arms around his friend once more, tightly squeezing him with all the love left inside of him. "Promise me you'll never leave me again Dan. You know I can't live without you. You're my everything."

Dan wrapped his free hand back around his friend, accepting the embrace. Phil's comments caught him off guard, his heart fluttering at his choice of words. Why did he have to settle for such a thing? And why did the sheer thought of him saying it make him al tingly inside? Was this normal?

"You're my everything."

Ok. Maybe the love he felt for his best friend wasn't as platonic as he thought.