Chapter 51- The Birth
A/N: This chapter is dedicated to Felicis9f for their patience in putting up with my demanding questions about pregnancy and childbirth. This chapter would not be what it is without you.
Thursday, February 26, 2015
7 pm
It's Thursday night, the eve of her 42nd week. They had spent the day enjoying themselves: a walk, sex, the Wedding Bride movie, an early dinner out, and more sex. It had been a lovely day for Robin, considering the situation.
Everything is uncomfortable for her. Everything. She reminds herself that this is the last night. Tomorrow, come hell or high water, they are going to get this process started. It still may be a few days before Brianna is actually born, but it doesn't matter. It will at least feel like she's working towards something. Right now she's just in limbo land, and she hates limbo land. Limbo land doesn't let her be in control, and she'd much rather be in control.
Even sex isn't exciting anymore. It has started to hurt. But they've kept doing it, because it's supposed to start labor, and at this point, she'll do anything.
She's lying on her side, with him still inside of her from behind, still coming down from the high of her orgasm. She feels the familiar tightness around the baby as she starts to relax. She doesn't think anything of it, that is until she realizes that it hasn't gone away like it normally does. But between him rolling away from her and them turning on the TV to catch up on some shows on the DVR, she forgets about it and it goes away.
Then 20 minutes later, she's propped up on pillows, watching the latest Game of Thrones, and she feels it again. She feels the same tightening, only this time, it isn't from sex. She's never had one this long after sex. It can't be anything other than a contraction.
"Do you know what time it was when we finished?" she asks Barney. She didn't think about looking at the clock at the time.
"Sex?" he questions, not following her train of thought. She nods in confirmation. "Not for certain, maybe about twenty minutes," he answers. "We're about fifteen minutes into the episode. Why?"
"I think that I might be having contractions," she answers.
"Really?" he asks excitedly, perking up and almost jumping off the bed in excitement.
"I had a longer one than normal after sex but I didn't think anything of it at the time," she explains. "But I just had another one."
"Did it hurt?" he asks, because he's curious. All he's ever seen of childbirth is from TV and movies.
"Not too much," she shrugs. If she's honest, it didn't even hurt. It wasn't the most comfortable feeling in the world, but she wouldn't have called it painful.
"Okay," he replies. He's nervous and excited, but he's heard about false alarms, so he doesn't want to get his hopes up. "Let's keep watching and see what happens."
"Sounds like a plan. It's 7:32. Whenever the next one comes, we can figure it out," she sighs. She's ready to get her mind off of it again for a while.
They get wrapped up in the fight for the kingdom, and in what seems like five minutes, she feels it again. It's tighter this time, but still not incredibly painful. It does cause her to breathe heavily, grabbing Barney's attention. He stares at her for the thirty seconds it takes her to speak.
"What time is it now?" she questions.
Barney looks at his watch and answers, "7:51."
"So definitely a contraction," she mumbles. This is definitely it. It's been three in a row, about the same time apart. She's in labor.
"It's time?" Barney asks hopefully.
"I think so," she answers, breathing heavily and biting her lower lip. She doesn't want to jump the gun either. "I think this might be it."
"Alright! Let's go then," Barney announces, jumping off the bed. She doesn't follow him, and he turns to look at her with curiosity as to why she isn't moving.
"No, Barney," she reminds him. "The doctor told me to call when I felt something, remember?" she chastises. Sometimes she likes how eager he is, but right now, it's just getting on her nerves.
"Oh yeah," he mumbles. He hates that he can't pay attention. He really wishes he could remember half of the appointments the way that she remembers them.
She's on the phone and already talking by the time he's done with his mental barrage. He tries to listen in, but she's listening and only giving basic one word answers. He looks at her expectantly, until she hangs up the phone and plays with it in her hands.
"The doctor said just to monitor the contractions," she murmurs nervously. She was hoping that they'd tell her it was time to come in, even though she knew that wasn't going to happen. She just wants to get it all over with, cut to the chase and be at the hard part so it's all over. Plus, what Barney said earlier about things going wrong is now going to her head.
"That's all?" he grills. He doesn't remember the doctor appointment where she said they would be at home for a while. "No rushing to the hospital?" He wishes that he could remember. He would be much calmer right now.
"Nope," she confirms. "Not until my contractions are four minutes apart."
"And how far apart was your last one again?"
"Nineteen."
"Oh," he mumbles. He wonders just how long it's going to take until she's at that four minute mark.
"The doctor also said something about trying to sleep," Robin adds. It seems ridiculous and reasonable all at the same time. Going to bed at eight? That's absurd. But at the same time, she knows that tomorrow could be one of the longest days of her life, and sleep does seem pretty good right about now.
"So that means?" Barney asks, curious again. Why would the doctor be telling them to sleep?
"We should really probably try to sleep," Robin says. He's not sure why, but if that's what she wants, he'll do it.
So they snuggle up next to each other, regardless of how ridiculously early it seems.
Thursday 11 pm
He can't sleep. He tried. But he's not surprised at all. It's only eleven. Anyone who tries to go to sleep at this hour is just crazy. Unless of course, you're Robin right now. She's been so exhausted. The minute she laid down, she fell asleep, which he guesses is a good thing. If she is really having contractions, she's going to need all the sleep she can get.
He knows he needs his sleep too, because who knows how long the next day is going to be. But he's finding it impossible, especially since he can feel Robin tense at every contraction. Even when he tried lie with her and fall asleep, every time he would doze off, he would feel her contraction and it would wake him up.
He needs to be out of bed at the moment. He can't just lie here like this anymore. He's going stir crazy. He stumbles up, trying his best not to wake Robin. He tiptoes over to the desk to get his laptop, and quietly makes his way towards the living room, but he doesn't make it past the nursery. As soon as he passes the room by, he turns around and enters, admiring the peacefulness that he knows in a few short days is going to be overtaken by a bit of chaos. He figures it's still going to be a peaceful place when she sleeps through. It might even have the potential to turn into his favorite room in the apartment.
He sits down in the glider and places the computer on his lap. It's been a long time since he's written an entry for his blog, and what better of a time to write one than now. He feels that being surrounded by Brianna's stuff might finally give him some inspiration.
But yet, he doesn't know what to write. He doesn't know what to write to make it something his followers will want to see, while still making it something that's true. He wants to write something, anything, but his heart isn't in it. His heart is still in the bedroom with Robin. He never thought the day would come that he wouldn't know what to write in his blog. Maybe, just maybe if he believes in all that Ted and Tracy crap for a minute, it's the universe telling him to go join Robin in bed. After all, it's where he wants to be. He just hopes he can sleep.
Friday, February 27, 2015
4 am
He wakes up and realizes the Robin isn't in bed. The panic reminds him of a night not too long ago, right before they found about her pregnancy. Well, except that this time is worse. He's got two of them to worry about now.
He finds her in the bathroom, yet again, but this time is quite different. She's in the Jacuzzi tub, with her head back on the rim, breathing a bit heavy, letting the bubbles wash over her.
"Ummm, what are you doing?" he questions. To him, it doesn't seem like the time to be doing this.
"What does it look like I'm doing?" she snaps back. He wasn't quite expecting the sarcasm, but he should have known that. She's always got a mean streak when she's in pain.
"Do you have any idea what time it is?" he asks. He's drowsy now. He was hoping to get to sleep all night, but he guesses it's ironic. The baby isn't even here yet and she is already keeping him up.
"I couldn't sleep," Robin admits. "The warm water is supposed to ease the contractions a bit." It's not like it's a bad pain, but it feels good to her to be in the water. "Do you wanna join me?"
"It's four in the morning. Are you crazy?" he chides, looking at her like she has two heads. Now is not the time to be joining her in a bathtub. There are more pressing matters now that he's up. "When was your last contraction?"
"A while ago," she dismisses, not really caring at this point. She knows they aren't even close to four minutes yet. "They aren't close yet. Don't worry."
"You know I'm going to worry," he says, running his hand through his hair. He's getting a little exasperated at her nonchalance about this. She's having a baby for crying out loud. Isn't she worried? He's personally freaking out, but he's not going to tell her that. So he'll do the second best. He'll micromanage. "What time was it at?"
"I don't know," she shrugs, just barely lifting her shoulders out of the water.
"Fine," he huffs. "I'll lay in here with you and time them."
He grabs a towel and balls it up, before he lies down on the floor, putting it under his head as a pillow. The tile is cold on the bare skin of his arms, but he's so worried about Robin, he doesn't even seem to care.
"Painful yet?" he asks, uncomfortable with the silence between them.
"Ehh," she shrugs. "Sort of. It's not as bad as I thought it was going to be." Everyone she knows that has had a baby made such a big deal over childbirth and how painful it was. Yeah, it's not like running through a meadow, but it doesn't compare to the pain of being checked against the boards by a six foot two, two hundred pound hockey player. She'd take this any day.
"I can't believe it's time," he murmurs to himself.
"I just want to wake up tomorrow and have her here," she adds. She'd just rather skip this whole labor thing.
"That would be nice wouldn't it?" he agrees. If only they could just sleep through it all and wake up when she's here.
She tenses up slightly at the feeling of another contraction. He takes mental note of the time, 4:27 am, and takes her hand. She squeezes it, riding out the rest of the contraction. They are still short. It's all over in thirty seconds or so.
He lies back down on the tile floor, and stares at the ceiling. He listens to her humming, and starts to drift back to sleep.
"Ooh. another one," she says quickly and breathily. "Time?"
He sits up quickly, checking his watch. 4:37.
"Ten minutes," he announces. "You okay in here?" he asks as he starts to get up to leave. He really just wants to head back to bed.
"I think so," she answers sadly. He can tell that she doesn't want him to go, but she's too afraid to ask.
"You want me to stay?"
"Yeah," she admits.
He lays a towel on the floor, sits back down, and curls up on the tile floor, preparing for a long night. He's going to feel this in the morning for sure.
Friday 5 am
He awoken by sounds of splashing water and opens his eyes to see her trying to get herself up out of the tub.
"What's up?" he asks, wondering why she's so insistent on getting up now.
"Water's cold."
"So what's next?" he questions. He seems to just be along for the ride.
"Going back to bed for a bit," she mutters, already seemingly exhausted.
"Okay," he answers, as he watches her continue to struggle to stand.
"Can you help me stand up?" she begs. He hasn't seen her this dependent in a while. She's wanted to do a lot for herself in the past few weeks. She said it had something to do with gaining her independence back, whatever that meant. She was always independent to him. Nothing would ever change that. It's what he loves about her.
"Sure."
Between holding her up, and having to get in the tub to help her out, he ends up just as wet as he would have been if he just had gotten in with her in the first place. He's going to have to change. That's what he gets for wearing his Armani sweats to bed tonight.
He grabs them both a towel, and strips off his soaking wet clothes. He helps her dry off, before drying off himself. He helps her walk back to the bed and gets her situated, making sure she's comfortable. He doesn't move from her side until he notices that she's dozing. Then and only then, does he think about getting new clothes and cuddling up beside her.
Friday 7 am
"How long was that one?" he asks. They have been up for a few minutes, but they are still lying in bed, trying to relax.
"Five minutes," she replies. The waiting is torture. She just wants to be at four minutes already.
"God if only Lily would have been this slow," he moans, recalling the day that he was stuck in Atlantic City with Marshall. "Then that wouldn't have been as much of a fiasco."
"Yeah, then I wouldn't have passed out in the delivery room," she remembers. Then it hits her. "Oh god," she starts to hyperventilate. "That's going," she breathes heavily. "To be me in a couple of hours. Oh god." She hangs her head in her hands, and at that moment, a contraction courses through her body. The contractions are now at a point that they are painful, but it's still nowhere near the worst pain she's ever experienced. It leaves her out of breath, but somewhat calmer.
"Why don't we eat something?" Barney suggests.
"Like what?" she questions skeptically. Eating something is the last thing on her mind right now. She can't believe he is even suggesting eating something.
"I don't know," he shrugs. He's quite proud of himself though. Of all the things he learned from the baby book, this may be the only one that she didn't know: Women are supposed to eat a small meal in the early stage of labor so they have energy for later when they may not be allowed to eat. He doesn't want to act smug in knowing it, so he casually suggests something. "Maybe a granola bar or something? You are going to need some energy for later."
"If I eat something, can we go to the hospital?" she counters. She just wants to leave now. "Not that I'm feeling bad pain yet, but I'm don't feel like it's far away." He knows it's a big deal for her to admit to being in any sort of pain. She always thinks that she has to be tough, even around him.
"Yeah. That's fine," he agrees, because he figures that by the time they are ready to go, she'll be pretty close to four minutes.
She climbs out of the bed, slower than ever. He follows her to the kitchen, where she sits down and he procures some of the granola bars they have stashed in the back of the cabinet. He realizes now that he's probably going to have to get Lily to do some shopping for them, since they have almost no food in the house. The last thing they are going to want to do is try to go shopping with a baby, when they don't go shopping that much to begin with.
He hands her one of the bars. She tears it open, and the minute she smells the sweetness, her hunger kicks in. She starts to devour it almost immediately.
"I do have a question for you," she announces with a mouthful.
"Hmm?" he mumbles, also with a mouthful, but choosing to use his manners instead.
She swallows and then asks, "you're going to wear that suit?"
"Yeah, why?" he asks incredulously. The suit he chose to put on this morning is one of his favorites. He thinks he looks amazing in it, and he couldn't imagine wearing anything else to welcome his daughter into the world.
"You do realize that she's not going to come out wrapped in a blanket and smelling of roses right?" she questions, right before taking another bite.
"Uh, yeah?" He knew that. Of course he knew that. He just may have forgotten in his haste this morning. Okay, he forgot altogether.
"You really want to ruin Arturius?" she questions again. "He's one of your favorites."
"I guess you do have a point," he admits. She's right. He doesn't want anything to happen to Arturius, but he doesn't really want to not wear a suit. It is an important occasion after all.
Halfway back to the bedroom, it occurs to him. He was just about to retire Bromulus anyway. Wouldn't it be a noble way for him to go?
Friday 9 am
"Alright. That was four minutes," Barney declares. After changing, he had convinced her to sit on the couch and catch up on some hockey highlights, while waiting for her contractions to get closer together. She surprisingly finds a rerun of a game, and at this point is so invested, she isn't even really concerned about the contractions.
"Really?" she questions. "They don't seem that much closer together." She hadn't even noticed. She hasn't seen a game between the Leafs and the Rangers in a long time, and she has every intention of getting to the end of the very close game. Without a doubt, Barney had succeeded in distracting her.
"It is," he confirms. "I even used the stopwatch app this time. You want to see?"
"No, I believe you," she answers. "I just am not in pain right now. It doesn't seem like we should be heading for the hospital yet." Barney is just slightly annoyed. Less than two hours ago, he had to talk her out of leaving for the hospital. Now here she is, so invested in the game that she doesn't even realize it.
"Yes, but it's time," he announces. He's glad she's been distracted, but now he's anxious. He has to get her to that hospital. He gets up from his spot beside her to turn off the TV. She groans.
"I know," she sighs. "Let's go."
Friday 10 am
"This is a really nice room," Robin coos in awe once she settles in. She's already in the horrible baby blue hospital robe, but she's managed to relax in the recliner near the window.
"Of course," Barney agrees. "That's why we picked this hospital, remember?" They had had the choice of two hospitals, both of which the doctor was affiliated with. She didn't get to come on the tour, but he found this one to be much nicer. The other hospital was good too, but in this hospital, they could stay in one room for the entire process, and there was even a bed for him to sleep in. He had filled in Robin later, but it was her choice as well.
"I know. It's just so homey," she sighs. It doesn't feel like a room that should be in a hospital, at least to her. She has a large bed, a private bathroom with a tub, and a great view of the skyline. Plus, there is a couch, a recliner, and a regular bed, perfect for when the gang stops by to visit, and Barney stays the night. She couldn't have asked for a better place.
"It's a little too colorful for me," he replies. The white walls were a plus to the other hospital, at least in his opinion.
"It's a birthing suite," she chides. "It's supposed to look like a baby's room, not a grey monotonous blob." Even though she loves him, she would never understand Barney's obsession with all the fifty shades between black and white.
"I thought you liked the fortress," he grumbles, with his brow raised.
"I do, but not everyone does," she answers honestly. "Most people like some color in their life."
At that moment, mostly because he's tired of talking about the wall color, he realizes that they should probably let the gang know they are here.
"I'm gonna go call the gang. Is that okay?" he asks.
"Yeah," she sighs. "Can you tell them not to come yet?"
"Sure?" he questions skeptically. Yes, they hadn't talked about when they would be calling their friends, or if they would even be there, but he can't imagine not having them here for this moment.
"I think we need to do this on our own," she says with a sensitive tone. "I don't really want them all sitting outside the door for hours." It's not that she doesn't want them here, but she remembers what it was like at Marvin's birth, and that went a whole lot faster than her labor is currently progressing. She was bored to tears, just talking with Ted for the two hours after they got kicked out of the room until they could see Lily and the baby.
"Alright," he agrees. He can tell that this means a lot to her. And she's right. Not only can they do this on their own, but he remembers how boring it was when Marvin was born, and he barely made it there in time. "I'll tell them."
He walks out of the room to find the waiting room that allows phone calls. It's actually not as far away from her room as he would have expected, just a few doors down and around the corner. He quickly whips out his phone, and dials Lily's number.
"Hello?"
"Hey Lil!" Barney croons into the phone.
"Hey. What's up?" she asks, seemingly unaffected by his sing-songy voice.
"Robin's in labor," he explains, rather calmly for a man about to become a dad.
"Oh my god!" Lily exclaims. "We're on our way!" He hears some muffling in the background, and tries to catch her before she hangs up. He knows Lily can be a little too excited about their relationship sometimes, but this is a bit too much.
"Wait Lily!" he shouts a little too loudly into the phone, but she's gone. He looks at his phone, and sure enough, he sees his home screen. He has no option other than to call her back, and hope she picks up, but knowing her, she's probably already half way to the hospital by now.
"Come on pick up," he mumbles into his phone as he listens to it ring. Finally he hears her on the other end and he cuts her off before she even has the chance to speak.
"Lily," he says urgently.
"Yeah?" She's curious as to why he's called back already.
"Don't come yet."
"Why?" she questions. She's shocked that they don't want her there.
"We've decided that we don't need anyone yet," he answers, hearing her dejection. "I promise you can come sometime, just not yet. We're fine."
"Alright," she groans. "I'm not happy about this, but if you need anything, just call me."
"Will do Lil, will do."
He hangs up and then quickly dials Ted. He doesn't want to be away from Robin for another second.
"Hey Ted."
"Hey bud. What's up?" Ted asks, assuming that this is the call. He knows there is no other reason as to why Barney would be calling otherwise.
"We're at the hospital," Barney repeats.
"You want us to come over?" Ted asks. It's tradition for them to be there for a birth, but at the same time, he knows how independent they can be, and he doesn't want to step on their toes. Well, that and Tracy hasn't been feeling well. He doesn't really want to leave her.
"Nah, not yet," Barney answers causally.
"Good," Ted admits. "Because Tracy is not feeling well. Maybe she'll be a bit better later and then we can head over. Let us know."
"Sure. Hope she feels better," Barney offers.
"Yeah. Good luck man."
"Thanks."
He wastes no time in walking back to the room, letting his long legs carry him as fast as they can, without actually running.
"Done," he announces loudly as he enters the room.
"Great," she huffs completely uninterested. She's in the middle of a contraction, and she could care less if Barney is done with the phone calls or not.
He can see that she's in the middle of a contraction and he walks to the side of the bed to hold her hand.
"What did the doctor have to say?" he asks, once she has relaxed. He happened to see the doctor walk out of her room on the way back from the waiting room.
"Not much," she shrugs, not caring particularly. "I'm at five centimeters. She asked me if I wanted pain meds. I said no." He looks at her in shock. It takes a few seconds to sink in that she denied pain meds.
"You said no?" he queries, with almost a screech. It's almost too much for him to believe.
"Yeah," she dismisses. She's still not in a great deal of pain, and at this point, she doesn't see the point of risking the side effects to Brianna to save herself the trouble.
"Why exactly?" he queries. He doesn't see the point of not having pain medication. If he could take away some of the pain, he would immediately, both for himself and for her.
"Because I'm not in that much pain," she replies.
"You sure about that?" he questions.
"Not bring in that much pain?" she asks curiously.
"No, not wanting pain meds," he clarifies.
"Yes I'm sure," she insists. "Lily was already in a lot of pain by this point," she explains. "The pain is not really getting worse either. I'll be fine. Besides, all Scherbatakys have a really high pain tolerance, and this way, Brianna doesn't get any of the bad side effects. I'll be fine," she insists again.
"Alright. If that's what you want."
He's incredibly uneasy about her denying the pain meds, especially since they didn't discuss it. He can see this all going downhill really fast, and she'll be begging for drugs when it's too late. Plus, she's doing this to prove something and he doesn't like it. He just hopes she comes around soon, before it's too late.
Friday 12 pm
"Finally," she sighs. "We're alone." For the last few hours, Robin's contractions had progressively gotten worse. She is now at the point of true pain. She does kind of regret not getting some drugs, but she'll survive.
"Yeah and?" he questions.
"I need you to do something for me," she beseeches.
"Yeah?"
"Play with my nipples," she demands.
"WHAT?" he exclaims. That was not what he was expecting to come out of her mouth. Honestly, he's even a little bit appalled. She can't possibly mean that.
"Just do it!" she enjoins.
"But you are in labor," he counters, almost speechlessly. "This is not the time for sex."
"Just shut up and do it!" she snarls. He does as he's told, because he doesn't want to stand in her way.
"Ahhhh!" she moans at the beginning of the contraction. She breathes heavy and barely makes her way through.
"What was that about?" he cajoles.
"It's something I read online a couple of months back," she admits, a bit embarrassed by the thought.
"And what is that exactly?"
"It's called an orgasmic birth," she explains. At the time, she was researching birthing options, and came across some unusual ideas. She had to dismiss most of them right away, such as water births, or home births, because she had a high risk pregnancy. And even the ones that were hospital based seemed out of reach, since she assumed that she would be going into labor early. But even so, this one stuck in the back of her mind. The thing that she liked most about it was she could use some of it while in the hospital, regardless of the type of delivery.
"Orgasmic birth?" It seems like such an oxymoron to him. How can you even mix those two words together? He's sure that everyone would agree with him on that.
"Yes. It's the idea that you make your baby's birth a pleasurable experience, instead of a painful one." He lets it sink in for a moment. The more he ponders it, the less absurd it sounds. It actually kind of makes sense.
"And why did you wait to tell me about this until now?" he asks.
"Because I never thought that we would end up being relaxed enough to use it," she sighs. "It's usually only a part of home births, which wasn't an option for us. I always assumed that I'd be induced and or on so many drugs or have complications so I could never use it, so I thought it was pointless to bring up."
"And you want to do this?" he questions. He doesn't mind being a part of it, but he wants to make sure that she really wants to have this be a part of their baby's birth.
"Yes, I'm sure," she answers. "It helped with the last contraction."
"Is this why you didn't want the drugs?"
"Partly," she admits. She did realize that it was a part of it, especially when she wasn't having that much pain. She did want the chance to experience it, so when she had the chance, she took it.
"You do realize if you had told me earlier, I would have been completely on board," he replies.
"Again," she counters, "didn't think I would be able to use it."
"Okay this is going to be a stupid question, but what is it about exactly?" he asks. He thinks he understands, but he's not entirely sure.
"It's not a stupid question. You try to make the experience pleasurable. You do stimulating things to release hormones, which helps control the pain," she clarifies. "It's only an overtly sexual thing if you want it to be."
In a weird way, it does make sense to him.
"Again," she mumbles, before tensing up. He does the same thing as last time, and she relaxes a bit as soon as his fingers touch her. She smiles at him once it's over. She can't quite believe how much it helps the pain.
"And then of course there are the women that report having birth orgasms," she adds.
"Birth orgasms?"
"Birth Orgasms," she restates. "Like they actually orgasm during pushing."
"Oh my god," he mumbles. He's actually slightly horrified by that thought. He may be considered a sex addict by a lot of people, but that even seems a bit too far for him. "That might have been more than I needed to know."
"You? TMI? Really?" she scoffs. "It's not something you can control," she scolds, before asking, "So you gonna help me or not?"
"I guess," he answers. The whole idea still kind of freaks him out, but he'll do it to make her feel better.
"No," she insists. "No I guess. I'm the one pushing out the Lambracuzzi here." He can't help but smile at her reference to his dream car, which he once said he wanted more than kids. He couldn't have been more wrong back then. He really wants to be a father.
"I'm in. I'm always in for you."
Friday 3 pm
Now Robin gets it. She gets why everyone calls this the worst pain in the world. The last contraction felt like it was going to rip her apart. It was long. It was grueling. It was by far the worst pain she's ever felt in her life. Even the time in between the contractions hurts now.
"Okay!" she whispers breathily. "I take it back. I want the drugs. Get me an epidural. I don't think I want to feel this anymore," she begs, on the verge of tears. She just wants it to stop. It hurts too damn much to go on.
"You want me to go get the doctor?" he asks quickly, not particularly wanting to leave her side, but he'll do it for her.
"Yes!" she pleads.
Time goes by so slowly, that it feels like an eternity that Barney is gone. The nurse tries to get her to breathe through the contraction, but she can't. She just wants this to be over.
"I WANT AN EPIDURAL NOW!" she cries through the contraction, as the doctor walks into the room with Barney. He can't stand to see her screaming, even for thirty seconds. He watches her throw herself back on the bed, and he can't help but wish that he could switch with her for just a minute. Just to take away her pain for a while.
"I'm sorry," the doctor sympathizes. "You're at nine centimeters. It's too late for an epidural. At this point, all I can give you is some standard pain medications, but it's not going to take away the pain or the feelings completely. And based on your progress, we are a little too close to the birth for those as well. Giving you anything at this point could have a negative effect on the baby."
He watches as she clenches again, pressing her eyes shut and screaming in pain. It's awful. He hates seeing her like this. The contractions just last for so long. He tries not to panic, but watching her, he just can't imagine that this is normal. He feels that something has to be going wrong.
"Something," she breathes shakily, coming out of the contraction. "Just get me something." She barely has time to get the words out, before she's shouting, "Barney! Now!" Another contraction pulls her back away from reality. If anything has made him want to run during her pregnancy, it is watching her at this point. He can't even imagine how she is making it through.
"Are you regretting this now?" he asks after her contraction finishes again.
"Yes," she admits scornfully. "It got a bazillion times worse in the past hour alone. God I feel like I'm gonna be sick," she spits out. As if the contractions weren't bad enough, she feels so sick to her stomach.
"You're fine," he coos sweetly, trying his best to calm her down and think happy thoughts. He strokes her hair and plants a kiss on her sweaty forehead. "You are fine. You will make it through this just fine. You are a Scherbatsky."
"Thanks," she smiles weakly. "It's not helping though."
Yet another contraction tears through her body. He does his best to encourage her, and just make her comfortable. It's another long one, almost double the length of the last one.
"You're amazing Robin," he murmurs in her ear after she relaxes. "You can do this."
"Just be helpful," she growls. "Nipples."
"But nurse," he whimpers. He doesn't feel quite comfortable with this.
"I don't give a flying FUCK AT THIS POINT, BARNEY!" she screams, a contraction hitting her halfway through her appeal. "JUST FUCKING DO IT!" He does as he's told. He needs to give her what she needs to get through this, despite the dirty looks they are getting from the nurse.
When she collapses from exhaustion, he feels his phone buzz. He knows he should let it go, and keep all his focus on Robin, but it keeps buzzing. He figures that maybe it's important, and she has her eyes closed. He can get away with sneaking a peek.
When he sees texts from Ted, he figures whatever he has to say must be important. He knows they are at the hospital. There is absolutely no reason he would contact him unless he really needed to. But then again, it is Ted. It could be something pointless and stupid.
The minute he opens the texts, he wishes he could go back and not see them. Not only is Tracy in labor too, but it's going so fast for her that they are already at the hospital. There is no way that Ted and Tracy can have their baby before they have theirs. It's not fair. It's not fair to Robin, it's not fair to Bri, and it's not fair to him. They've done so much more for their baby, that they should get to have theirs first.
Then he worries about Robin. When she hears this, she is going to flip. She is going to want to give up. She going to cuss and scream and rip his head off. Why couldn't he have just left his phone alone? It would have been so much easier not to know that they were here, that they didn't have to compete for yet another pregnancy milestone with Ted and Tracy.
"Were you just checking your phone?" Robin grumbles, breaking him out of his revelry.
"No," he lies.
"Yes, you were," she implicates. "Phones are not important right now. Turn IT OFF," she turns from a deride into a scream as yet another contraction takes over all of her body. While he helps her through the contraction, he debates telling her, because it would get him off of the hook, but at the same time, he doesn't want to drop this bomb on her.
"Don't be upset," he tries to comfort.
"I shouldn't be upset," she scowls sarcastically. "Go ahead. Your phone is more important than your wife and daughter," she snaps. "That's fine."
"No, that's not what I meant," he says, choosing the path of saving his own ass. "The text I was from Ted. Ted and Tracy are here," he explains.
"Already?" she whines. "I thought we told no one to come yet."
"Tracy's in labor," he sighs heavily, just letting it out there.
"You've got to be fucKING KIDDING ME! AHHHHHHH!" she screams at the top of her lungs. Her reaction is worse than he could have imagined. Not only is she panicking, she's panicking during a contraction. Great. Just great. "SHE BETTER NOT," she pauses for a short breath. "HAVE THAT BABY." Breath. "BEFORE ME!"
"You need to breathe," he quickly reminds her.
"I AM!" she yells directly at him. "THERE IS NO." Breath. "WAY." Breath. "SHE GETS TO." Breath. "DO THAT!" she ends in a huff, "I've been in labor for twenty hours. TWENTY HOURS! I'm uncomfortable, I want to sleep, I just want this to be over," she whines, crying. He shouldn't have done this. He shouldn't have told her. She could have hated him, but he would have been protecting her. "If she has that baby before me I swear to God!"
"Calm down," he whispers soothingly into her ear. "You're almost there. She just got here. There is no way that is going to happen."
"Baby girl, you better listen to me," she announces loudly, picking her head up and talking directly at her stomach. "We are not going to lose this battle. You do not get to be younger than your cousin. You are going to do what you need to do and get out right now."
"Shhhh…" he tries to calm her down.
"AHHHHHHH," she screams again. "I WANT HER OUUUT!"
"Shhhhh," he utters, trying to remind her of what she should be doing. "Come on. You need to stay calm."
"STAY CALM?" she screams again. "HOW CAN I STAY CALM?" she huffs, the contraction ending, and her voice dropping lower. "I've been pregnant longer. She gets to be normal and have her baby before me? Na uh," she declares.
"Calm down," he reminds her. He turns to the nurse and asks, "Can we have a little bit of privacy?"
"Uh, sure," the nurse answers. "Just let me know immediately if any monitors start going off." She immediately walks out of the room, but stands right outside the door, just in case. It doesn't bother him. He just needs the short minute to bring Robin back down to earth, alone.
"Scherbatsky," he says, looking her straight in the eye. "You are having this baby, and you are doing awesome!" He reaches his hand under her hospital gown, and she moans in relief. "You only have a bit more to go. You can do it."
"But…."
"No," he insists. "You are the most amazing woman I know. You are going to get through this, and you are going to brag to the other two that you did it without drugs, because I'm the only drug you need." He waits for yet another contraction before he can continue. "And that it didn't even hurt that much in the beginning because you are just that awesome. YOU. CAN. DO. THIS."
Friday 4 pm
"How are you doing?" The doctor asks, finally in the room. To Barney and Robin, it feels like forever since she came into check on them, even though it had only been half an hour. She really hopes this is it though. She's ready to be done.
"Fantastic," she snarls. "Get your head out of your ass." What does the doctor think? She's in labor.
"Sorry," Barney adds. "She gets really sarcastic when she's in pain." This is one of those moments he wishes that Robin wouldn't have such a mean streak.
"A lot of women do. Let's see how you're doing here," the doctor says, while examining Robin. "The baby seems to be in a good position. She's moved down too. You're at 10 centimeters. Looks like we're ready to start pushing."
"Thank god!" Robin mutters.
"Remember, stay calm," Barney reminds her.
"Push when you feel the urge to unless I tell you to stop," the doctor tells her.
"What if I don't feel it?" she asks, panicking.
"You will," the doctor reassures.
"Oh god Barney! My body is failing me already. I don't feel like I need to push," she cries out. God, she isn't even born yet, and she's already a horrible mother. She doesn't even have the instinct to get the baby out of her.
"Relax," he utters.
"No! My body is not meant to do this!" she argues.
"Yes it is," he argues back.
"NO IT ISN'T. THERE IS A REASON I'M NOT SUPPOSED TO BE ABLE TO HAVE A BABY!"
"You need to relax. The time in between contractions is for resting," he reminds her, "not for doubting. Focus. She's almost here, and you are not making this a very pleasurable experience, like you told me you wanted to earlier."
At that moment, a contraction takes over, and changes her mind. She feels it. She wants to push along with the contraction.
"See," he points out. "It's natural. You can do this."
"NO!" she insists. "No I can't."
"Yes. Yes, you can. You can do this," he reminds her. "You survived three days in the woods. You landed a helicopter on your own. You can do this."
"Ugggh!" she's tired of him arguing that she can do this, because he's wrong. She can't. She can't take it anymore. She can't be a mom. "NO I can't. I'm tired!" she whines.
"Yes you can! You have a better stamina than anyone else I've ever met," he adds to the already growing list of reasons why she can. She can't help but laugh at it. "A couple more minutes. Just a little bit more. You can do it."
The pushing seems to go on for hours. Barney is able to keep her calm, and help her through the pushing. He's all encouragement, all you can do this, all you're almost there. Of course, he finds a way to push her on, in a way that is him and him alone- raunchy jokes.
But she can't remember any of them. She's so focused on just getting through it, just surviving, that nothing else registers. All she wants to do is go to sleep. Her body is exhausted, and the burning sensation is ten times worse than the worst pain she's experienced in her entire life, and she knows what pain is. She's been through a whole hell of a lot of it with her dad. Between the burning and the contractions, she feels like she wants to die.
"Give it one good push," she hears from the fog. This is it. This is the moment. She spent the last almost seven months in bed for this moment. One last push, and she'll be here.
She's extremely tired, but she contracts everything one last time, using all the energy she has left. She can still feel everything, but this last push, it's not unpleasant. It's not painful like the rest have been. It's freeing. It makes her body surge with a feeling that she can't quite put a finger on. It's an immense feeling of relief. She doesn't want to call it an orgasm, but in a way, it is orgasmic.
Then she can feel the doctor pulling the baby out, and she collapses backwards on the bed, shaking uncontrollably from the immense change in her body. She doesn't think she can move, but she wants to look. She wants so badly to sit up and look at her daughter, but she can't make her body move. She needs to rest more, and it makes her feel incredibly guilty, but she closes her eyes, at least for now, letting the world go on around her.
Barney isn't sure where to look. He's torn between a trembling Robin, and a baby he can't even fully see, since they are holding her so low. He knows that Robin just gave him the best gift in the world. He feels incredibly horrible for her. He feels exhausted, just from the lack of sleep, and he knows he did nothing, absolutely nothing compared to her. He wouldn't even dare say that he's tired at this point. Robin would probably castrate him.
It seems like an eternity, waiting, the seconds moving so slowly, until they hear her cry for the first time. Robin always found the sound of a baby crying irritating, but this one, this one sounds like music to her ears. Maybe it's everything she went through, but it's a comforting sound, a sound that made the last seven months worth it.
Barney takes a quick look at his watch. 4:37. For some reason, that number is burned into his brain. He's not even sure why that time is familiar, it just is. But it's now a time he'll never forget. He's a dad. He has a baby. Even still, it seems almost improbable.
Then there is a flurry of activity, of noise. Robin feels something warm being placed on her chest, before she's covered with a blanket. It takes her a moment to realize in the fog that it's Brianna. She's here, she's on the outside of her body, and it feels so weird. In an instant, the room quiets down, and she finally gathers the energy to lift her head. She opens her eyes to a head full of curly brown hair, just a shade lighter than her own. It's then when she's finally overwhelmed, when she finally breathes a sigh of relief and lets her tears flow.
Barney can't believe it. He always thought that Robin was the most beautiful person he could ever lay his eyes on, but this little baby, she wins hands down. Yes, she's wrinkled, she's peeling, and she's an awkward shade of purplish pink with a white fuzzy coating, but he doesn't care. The world has somehow stopped around him, and not in a bad way. He reaches out to put his hand on her, wanting to be as close to her as Robin gets to be. She's had her for the last nine months. He hasn't even gotten to feel her yet, but he'll wait on holding her, since he knows how much Robin insisted that she would be on her for the first hour. For now, he'll settle with touching her.
He reaches his hand under the blanket and strokes her back softly, and she starts to gurgle.
"Hey baby girl. Welcome to the world," he utters quietly, putting his other arm around Robin and pulling her toward him, then gently kissing her forehead. It's a moment he'll never forget, moment that he can safely say is one of the happiest of his life.
A/N: I never thought that when I started back in May, that this story would turn out to be quite this big. I also never expected that the week that I would be writing this chapter, that the writers would give us a scene showing that a Swarkles baby might even be canon. I thank you all for following this story, and being such loyal readers.
And… this is not the end. There will be more to this story, much more, but I need a break from it. It's been a lot of hard work finishing this chapter for her actual birthday, and I would like to work on the other two stories for a bit. But I promise, I will come back to this one!