Skipping Picture Perfect(S1E7A) - The final picture is pretty much the same except that it shows Lily's corpse because Lincoln snapped her neck so she wouldn't walk around not wearing her diaper. Also skipping Undie Pressure(S1E7B) - Lincoln wins because he didn't forget about Lily. He eliminates her by shooting her legs off from the knees with his colt single action army revolver causing her to cry and wail horribly and eventually dies of blood loss.
Linc or Swim(or Drown)
The sun is shining really bright today, the sound of mosquitos buzzing and water splashing can be heard. Camera cuts to a sign reading "Royal Woods Community Pool". Camera zooms down to reveal Lincoln, wearing orange swimming trunks, stepping out of the changing room and tugging his trunks nice and tightly.
"Ah! On a hot summer day, there's nothing like a refreshing dip in the community pool." Lincoln states before he dashes towards the pool.
"CANNONBALL!" Lincoln shouts but halts because he heard a whistle blow.
"Loud family, out!" a buff lifeguard yelled angrily as the Loud sisters were forced out of the community pool.
Lori's wearing a two piece light blue bikini. Leni's wearing a two piece green tube top, with a skirt, a swim cap with a white bow on it, and sandals with green bows. Luna's wearing a one piece styled after her t-shirt, and bikini bottoms styled after her skirt. Luan's wearing a yellow one piece swimsuit with one of her gag flowers attached to it. Lynn's wearing a surfer shirt and red swim trunks. Lucy's swim attire consists of a black and white striped one-piece and black leggings. She also has a black umbrella. Lana's swimwear is a dark blue one piece swimsuit that looks like overalls, with orange floaties and flippers. Lola's swimwear is, as she calls it, a swim gown that gives her the appearance of a mermaid when she lays sideways. Lisa's swimwear consists of a green one piece suit, with goggles, and a snorkel. Lily's swim attire consists of a lavender onesie with a picture of a strawberry on it.
"But we were just having fun." Lynn tried to argue looking very upset.
"Chicken fights during Senior Swim are not "fun"." the lifeguard emphasized pointing at a fallen senior.
"I just replaced this hip!" Mrs. Jelinski yelled angrily while lying down on a towel.
The other seniors look back at the kids with concerned or angry expressions which include Lou Pickles, Grandpa Phil, Miss Bitters, Miss Fowl, and Iroh.
Screen wipe to show a sign called "Huntington Oaks Community Pool". Camera pans down to show Lincoln stepping out of the changing room, tugging on his trunks to check if it's firm again.
"'Sigh', On a hot summer day, there's nothing like a refreshing dip in the community pool... one town over." Lincoln stated not very enthusiastic this time about to do another cannonball.
Like last time, the sound of a whistle makes Lincoln halt to a stop, the camera pans up, to reveal his face, which has a rather pissed off expression.
"Loud family, out!" a male lifeguard wearing glasses yelled forcing the sisters to leave.
"But we were just having fun." Lana argued while holding a metal stirring spoon and wearing a sky blue one piece with a bunny on it along with her floaties and flippers.(Why change this when we see her wear the first one for the rest of the episode?)
"Drinking pool water is not fun." he shot back in annoyance.
"But it tastes like chicken noodle soup." Lana stated while licking her lips.
"Fine, but did you have to add the celery and carrots?" he asked as the camera zooms out to reveal that Lana has littered the pool with slices of celery and carrots. The lifeguard scoops some of these slices out with his pool skimmer.
Screen wipe to show another sign which reads "Hazeltucky Community Pool." A rooster crows and goat bleating can be heard in the background. The camera pans down to show Lincoln once again stepping out of the changing room, but has a rather irritated expression.
"On a hot summer day, oh, you know the rest." Lincoln stopped caring about making his introduction.
"CANNONBALL!" He once again dashes towards the pool.
Lincoln finally jumps in, but at that moment, the female lifeguard blows her whistle and swiftly catches Lincoln with her skimmer. Lincoln gets mad.
"Loud family, out!" she yelled as she drops Lincoln out of her skimmer kicking the sisters out.
"But we were just having fun." Lori argued as she and eight of her sisters leave with her.
"A dead baby in the pool is not fun. Hilarious, but not fun." the lifeguard retorted as the camera cuts to the pool where Lily is floating facedown in the water not moving.
Pretty much Lily who was toddling quickly around the pool slipped into the water. She obviously doesn't know how to swim and wasn't wearing water wings or any floatation devices whatsoever. Also, nobody, not even the lifeguard cared enough to save her from drowning.
Camera shows another glance of the sun, then it shows the ten siblings walking home.(Wait! What? Why are we walking home from Hazeltucky in our swimwear?)
"Come on, guys. We'll just find another pool." Lori said trying to cheer her siblings up.
"Actually, we've been suspended from every aquatic recreation center within a 60-mile radius." Lisa revealed as she pulls a wagon filled with swimming supplies.
The rest of the girls start grumbling in frustration.
"So that's it, then. No more pool for the Louds." Lincoln said in disappointment but eventually gets an idea.
"That's it! 'Pool for the Louds!' Why didn't I think of that sooner?" Lincoln exclaimed as he heads off with none of the girls noticing his leaving.
Over at Good Sport Sporting Goods, Lincoln is looking for a new swimming pool and picks up the DELUX SWIMMING POOL which is Muscle Fish approved and has a warning label that says it has dangerous levels of fun and is a drowning hazard showing a picture of Lily's head with X's for eyes and her tongue out.(I approve of this product.)
"Whoa. The perfect family pool. Just imagine..." Lincoln said as a thought bubble appeared over his head.
"On a hot summer day, there's nothing like a refreshing dip in your own pool." Lincoln stated before charging towards the big inflatable pool.
"Cannonball!" he shouts about to jump but comes to a screeching halt.
"Ah ah ah! Don't you dare splash me, Lincoln Loud! This outfit cannot get wet." Lola warned while lying on an inflatable mat floating on the pool.
It is revealed that his sisters have taken up the pool even in his own fantasy.
"But it's a swimsuit." Lincoln argued pointing out the obvious.
"It's a swim gown, Lincoln." Lola retorted as though there's an actual difference.
Lana who's adding celery and carrots is singing the song that no one sings anymore.
"Mama's little baby loves shortenin', shortenin'" Lana sings while scooping up some water and takes a sip.(Cooking only works if the water's boiling Lana.)
"Who wants to chicken fight?!" Lynn asked wanting to play and show her superior skills.
Luna lets out a war cry as a response letting Lynn on her shoulders.
"I'm in." Leni offered with a chicken on her back.
The chicken tries to get away while Leni holds on tight.
"Mmm...just what my soup needs..." Lana said while licking her lips when she see the chicken.(The water still needs to be boiling. Also, instead of chicken I prefer Lily.)
"Since this is the same fantasy as Canon Lincoln, he must have some kind of metal issues." Lincoln said wondering why he just doesn't go to Clyde's house and set up the pool there instead.
"Dead Baby!" Lori shouted as everyone leaves the pool seeing Lily floating facedown in the water not moving.(This will never get old.)
The thought bubble pops bring Lincoln back to reality.
"Maybe not so perfect." Lincoln stated thinking of a way to have his pool without his sisters butting in.
He sees another inflatable pool set though not as big and extravagant as the deluxe one.
"Hmm, Paradise for One? I got it!" Lincoln exclaimed getting an idea.
Lincoln ends up buying both since he literally has all the money in the Royal Woods universe.(Having the power do to anything with no consequences is really useful.)
As Lincoln walks up to his house he sees Lily in her cage that's on the front yard where no shade is. She's also wearing a blue diaper with yellow ducks on it.
"They must have cloned a new Lily and is punishing her for getting us kicked out of the last nearby community pool." Lincoln stated as he watches Lily lie in her cage sweating profusely.
It doesn't help the fact that her skin's looking red due to sunburn because no one wanted to waste sunblock on her.
"Inkin." Lily pleads for Lincoln's help wanting to get out of the sun and treat her sunburn.
"HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA!" Lincoln laughs in great amusement as he simply walks inside the house that still has a broken air conditioner as seen in a flashback from Homespun(S1E26b).
When Lincoln walks into the kitchen he sees his other sisters in front of the open refrigerator and freezer.
"Hey, Linc. Wanna chill with us?" Leni asked with a frozen bag of peas on her head.
"'Chill'! Good one, Leni!" Luan laughs at the unintentional pun.
"Good what?" Leni asked in confusion.
"Good news everyone! I bought us our very own inflatable pools!" Lincoln exclaimed showing them the two pool set boxes.
"REALLY?!" Lori asked in excitement.
"Cool." Lucy said still in monotone.
"Good one, Lucy!" Luan laughed causing Lucy to sigh in exasperation.
"Here you guys go, though you'll have to set it up yourselves." Lincoln said giving his sisters the Paradise for One box.
"Last one to the backyard gets bad sunburn like Lily!" Lynn shouted grabbing the Paradise for One box and rushes to the backyard with rest following soon after.
With the sisters gone Lincoln sits in front of the open fridge to cool off while also summoning Kalashnikov.
"Query: How may I serve Master?" Kalashnikov queried arriving in the kitchen.
"Move the cage Lily's in to the backyard and set this up in the front while I wait here." Lincoln ordered giving the robot the Deluxe Swimming Pool.
"Affirmative: Very well Master. I'll also make sure the cage is nowhere near any shade." Kalashnikov obeyed as he goes to fulfill his orders.
In the backyard Lynn dumps out the pool kit and instructions out of the box.
"The manual? Psst. Who needs the manual?" Lynn rebuked as she tries to set the pool herself.
"Sports sibling, that is not advised." Lisa tried to warn as instead of the shape of a circular pool the plastic takes the shape of a camping tent.(Seriously, all you had to do was put air into it.)
"What the...?" Lynn asked in confusion of how this happened.
"Let me try!" Lana exclaimed wanting to set it up herself but ended up making it look like a sailboat.
Lola tries next but makes it look like a unicorn.
"CURSE MY CREATIVITY!" Lola screamed in frustration due to the heat.
Getting annoyed Lynn wrestles with it but ends up getting bucked into the trashcan.
"Ahem." Lisa coughed getting everyone's attention as she holds the instructions.
"Ah, the manual. Everyone needs the manual." Lynn sheepishly said as she gets out of the trashcan.
Luna tries to inflate the pool with a bike pump but the pump ends up breaking.
"You owe me a new bike pump Luna!" Lynn shouted angrily.
"We should hurry. Some of us are already getting sunburn by standing under the sun." Lucy warned but since she's using her black umbrella she's fine.
"Luna, you have the strongest lungs so you should blow air into it." Lori advised applying sunblock as fast as she can before passing it out to the others.
"Alright dudes, just a sec." Luna obeyed grabbing the now deflated plastic pool, opened the air nozzle, and started blowing air into it.
"Ouch! My sunburn! Hurry up!" Laun shouted offering to use a pair of bellows to make inflating the pool faster but was knocked to the ground because of Leni.
"AAHH! A BEE!" Leni screamed running away from the bee that flew into the backyard.
"Oh, no, you don't..." Luna stated who just finished inflating the pool and closed the nozzle as she and some of the others try to shoo the bee away.
"AAAAAHHHHH!" Some of the girls screamed because the bee started chasing them and they end up getting stung once each.(I thought a bee can only sting once because the stingers gets separated from the body.)
"We sure showed that bee." Lynn said nursing her sting but is glad seeing the Paradise for One pool set up.
Only for the bee to come back and popping the inflatable pool with its stinger releasing all the air out.
"Damn it." Lisa said as she and the girls sighed dejectedly.
Later, the pool gets a patch where the sting occurred and is fully inflated with Luna hosing water into it and notices the shadow from the tree is casting over it. They then move the pool out into the sun while the water flows out and now the pool is empty again.(Wouldn't it make sense to keep the pool in the shade?)
"Alright then. Just need to refill the pool so we can all cool down." Lori stated causing the girls to shout triumphantly only to wince in pain because of their sunburn and bee sting.
After spending some time relaxing in the Deluxe Swimming Pool which includes using the water slide Lincoln goes to check up on his sisters. He then sees Lori and Leni lounging it the small pool at the same time.(Paradise for One. Not exactly as advertised.)
"How's the pool?" Lincoln asked finally taking time to appreciate his two eldest sisters figures while in their bikini/bathing suit.
"Lincoln, this is literally genius. Who's going to kick us out of our own pool? Right?" Lori rhetorically asks while raising a toast with Leni.
"How's your pool Lincoln?" Leni asks but seeing her brother looking really happy she already knows the answer.
"Just like how I imagined it to be." Lincoln replied happy he's not Canon Lincoln.
"CHICKEN FIGHT! I call Lincoln!" Lynn shouted as she pounces on Lincoln forcing him to carry her on his shoulders.
Getting annoyed at first Lincoln manages to balance Lynn without collapsing but gets excited when he feels her bottom half with the back of his head.(The true In Tents Debate.)
A few minutes later, the girls are having a pool party except Lily because Kalashnikov is slapping her sunburnt body causing her to cry out in pain.
"Statement: As long as my circuits don't overheat I can stay out in this sweltering heat as long as I want." the robot stated before slapping Lily's body again.
"WAAAAAHHHHH!" Lily cried feeling another wave of pain course through her red body except where her diaper is covering.
As Lynn is splashing everyone except Kalashnikov and Lily(Wouldn't want her to feel relief.), Lincoln sees Lisa adding some kind of chemical in the pool water.
"Lisa, what are you doing?" Lincoln curiously asks his tool of a sister.
"Testing sanitation levels. I've concocted a special serum that will detect and eliminate urine, AKA tinkle, in H2O." Lisa answered not wanting to swim around in her sisters' liquid waste.
"Wait Lisa-!" the girls shouted but was too late.
When Lisa added a drop of her chemical the entire body of water in the pool instantly evaporated causing her eight sister to blush in embarrassment.
"Hmm... unprecedented levels." Lisa admitted not expecting all of them to be guilty.
A few minutes later the pool is filled again and the party resumes. Leni and Luan are playing Marco Polo despite the pool being small.
"Marco!" Luan exclaimed with her eyes closed.
"Marco!" Leni also exclaimed with her eyes closed.
"No, Leni. I'm Marco(Hider). You're Polo(Seeker)." Luan tries to explain how the game works.
"Then who's Leni?" Leni asks in confusion wondering why their names needs to be change to play this game.
Luan just has a dumbfounded expression. While the sisters are distracted and Kalashnikov doing something Lincoln ordered him to do Lily takes this chance to take a dip in the pool to soothe her sunburn even for a little bit. She removes her diaper and waddles towards the pool which is difficult since even moving a little causes her great pain.
"Oh, no you don't Lily! You're punishment is not over yet!" Lincoln admonishes roughly picking her up and smacking her sunburnt body over and over causing her to cry in pain even more.
While hurting Lily Lincoln notices Lucy just floating face up in the pool not moving.
"Lucy? I didn't know you liked to swim." Lincoln questioned as he knows Lucy doesn't like to get wet even if it's to cool off.
"I'm not swimming. I'm trying to see if I'm a witch. Am I floating?" Lucy replied and asks for confirmation even though it's pretty obvious.
"Yes." Lincoln simply answered.
"Wicked." Lucy stated in her version of joy.
Lincoln continues to hurt Lily by pinching her hard all over her body including twisting her little nipples.
"AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!" Lily screamed in agony as she's getting a double purple nurple.(It's not like she'll have any use for them.)
Lucy left the pool satisfied with her findings allowing Lynn, Lana, and Lola a turn. Lynn has a pool noodle, Lana standing on the edge, and Lola lounging on her inflatable mat.
"You know what your soup needs? Noodles!" Lynn bonks Lana with her pool noodle.
"Bring it!" Lana grabs her own pool noodles and proceeds to fight Lynn causing water splash all over.
"STOP SPLASHING ME!" Lola yelled trying to keep her hair and swim gown dry.
"Girls, no horseplay!" Luna ordered not wanting to fill up the pool again.
"What about elephant play?" Luan jokingly asks before blasting Luna with a jet of water by blowing it from a pool noodle while sounding like an elephant.(How is that possible?)
Lynn, Lana, and Lola start laughing making Luan happy that her joke was a success. By being blasted Luna flies right into Bobby who's just arrived and is wearing red swim trunks and has a whistle tied around his neck.
"Huh? Bobby? What are you doing here?" Luna asked wondering why her eldest sister's boyfriend is here.
"Lori said there was an opening for a lifeguard at Casa Loud." Bobby replied before blowing his whistle.
"Everyone out! Senior swim!" Bobby declared ordering all younger Louds out the small pool.
"What? There aren't any old people here!" Luna shouted outraged and confused.
"Um, hello! High school senior? Shoo shoo. Oh, this really is paradise for one." Lori came and relaxed inside the pool obviously wanting the pool for herself.
This did not sit well with the rest of the girls who can speak and they started fighting over who has the most ownership of the Paradise for One.
"I'm the one who inflated and put water in it so it belongs to me!" Luna exclaimed believing that she deserves ownership since she did most of the work.
"Beauty before age!" Lola declared in her belief that she's the most beautiful.
"Yeah, so I should own it!" Lana countered thinking she's more beautiful than her twin and everyone else.
"Hey! I'm the oldest so it should be mine!" Lori shouted not letting her sisters in the pool.
"I don't know Lori. You shouldn't even walk around without a cane." Leni said taking the senior swim too literally thinking Lori is too old and decrepit causing Lori to growl in anger.
"Well, if you need me I'll be cooling off in my pool." Lincoln stated not wanting to get in the middle of another sister brawl so he unceremoniously tosses Lily back into her cage to swelter under the sun before going back to the front yard.
While lounging around in his Deluxe Swimming Pool for several minutes Lincoln eventually starts feeling very lonely.
"This is the part where Canon Lincoln realizes no man is an island and goes back to my sisters to spend time with them. However I have a different solution to that." Lincoln said to the audience/readers before ordering Kalashnikov to give him his cellphone so he can make some calls.
Not too long after several of his guests arrive because they too wanted to cool off in a pool and also spend time with their favorite boy in the world. What's noticeable is that all of the guests are girls as old as Lincoln or a few years older. They include his girlfriends Ronnie Anne and Christina while the rest are girls he's decided to add to his harem later on which include Haiku, Tabby, Polly, Giggles, Renee, Paige, Margo, Sam Sharp, Nikki, Rita, Maggie, Carlota, Becky, Carol Pingrey, Ms. DiMartino, and Thicc QT.(I know some don't make sense as of now but... fuck it.)
"Now this is what I'd call slippery wet fun." Lincoln stated as the girls and women all fawn over him.
Meanwhile in the backyard the Loud sisters and Bobby are in the Paradise for One Pool all at the same time.
"Can someone please tell me why we don't just get our own Deluxe Swimming Pool?" Lola asks as she and the others don't like being cramped in one place.
Before anyone can answer Lily who manages to get out of her cage waddles into the pool and does the only thing she exists to do in the actual show.
"FECAL INCIDENT!" Bobby shouted as he blew is whistle causing him and the nine Louds to rush out of the pool while screaming in terror.
"Poo-poo!" Lily giggled happily while splashing the water with her arms not bothered that's she's in her own filth.
Then heroically Lincoln comes, places his hands on the back of Lily's head causing her to look at him in confusion, and forcefully dunks her head into the contaminated water.
"This is what you get for ruining the ending of the actual episodes!" Lincoln exclaimed keeping Lily's mouth and nose submerged while she frantically thrashes with her tiny arms and legs while bubbles made by her breath surface at a rapid rate.
After a minute Lily stopped thrashing around and the bubbles stopped coming, Lincoln finally lets go and sees Lily floating facedown in the water not moving.
"Oh my gosh, you murdered Lily!" Lana yelled as she, the girls, and Bobby looked on in shock.
Instead of Lola calling Lincoln an asshole as per usual...
"HOORAY FOR LINCOLN!" the girls and Bobby cheered as they hold Lincoln up like he won a championship.
"Thank guy! Now let's continue our party in the front yard!" Lincoln declared pointing in the direction of the better swimming pool.
"YAAAAAAAAY!" they all cheered as they carried Lincoln the front yard.
What followed was an intense orgy that Lincoln enjoyed very thoroughly since he gave every girl a turn with the waters of the pool running white that day except Bobby who's still the lifeguard so he couldn't partake, not even with Lori.
For those who don't know Thicc QT aka Belle is a background character that appeared once in Raw Deal(S1E21B). She existed to fill up a long line for the gas station bathroom and had no lines yet many fans started creating fan art of her mostly for her unintentionally sexy design for a kids show. It's not exactly the same popularity as Derpy/Muffins but that's what I thought when I saw the fan arts of her.
Lily's death: First Lily slipped into the community pool and drowned. Imagination Lily drowned for no reason other than Lincoln's amusement. Second Lily was murdered by breathing in too much water and was deprived of oxygen.