Remember Me- Chapter Nineteen

Elena

"I, Elena Gilbert. Take you, Stefan Salvatore to be my lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do us part." Smiling widely, I hold onto his hands tightly. My stomach has knots in it and my eyes are welling with tears. I didn't think that we'd ever get here. I didn't think that it was going to end like this either though. I had come back here for our son. Not to disturb or ruin Stefan's life, because it seemed picture perfect. Honestly, I just wanted to get to know Ben. I've gotten to know him fairly well over these last few months. The fact that he loves pancakes, he loves running around the house and hiding when he doesn't want to go to school. He loves feeding the ducks that are out in the pond in our backyard. Bedtime stories are a must and dinosaurs are his new favorite. He misses Duke too. God, how he misses that dog, it breaks my heart.

"Mommy…" He says in a soft voice, tugging lightly on my off white last-minute wedding dress. It's just a plain white dress that I found in my closet and that I threw on for today. Oddly enough, it's one of Stefan's favorite dresses on me.

Clearing his throat, the officiant looks down at Ben with a smile and then at me. "I'm sorry." I comment, a tad bit embarrassed that we haven't gotten through all of our vows yet. Stefan smiles at us as I bend down and place both of my hands on Ben's shoulders. "What's wrong, baby?" I ask him. He's smiling, wearing a little bow tie and a black and white suit, a white flower pinned to his left pocket. His suit matches Stefan's. In the moment with his beaming brown-green eyes, he looks up at me with a huge smile and I can see his father in him so much that my heart swells with joy.

"We're going to be okay, mommy." He says, wrapping his arms around me as I lean over and pull him towards me. I can feel his little arms tighten around my neck as he buries his face into my hair. "I don't want you to leave anywhere again, momma." He says, whispering softly into my ear as I stand up with Ben in my arms and tell the officiant to keep going. Smiling through my tears, I kiss my son's cheek and whisper back into his ear. "I know that I haven't been around. But, I promise you, Benjamin. I'm never going anywhere again. It's you and me, baby boy…Forever. Us, against the world."

Holding Ben with one arm, Stefan takes my free hand and wipes away his tears with his other hand as he says. "I, Stefan Salvatore. Take you, Elena Gilbert to be my lawfully wedded wife, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do us part."

Stefan's hands are shaking as he takes my hand into his and slides a golden wedding on my finger while he recites out loudly. "I give you this ring, as a reminder that I will love, honor, and cherish you, In all times, In all places. And in all ways, forever." Through my own tears, I take his hand into mine and follow his actions.

"With the power vested in me, I now pronounce you husband and wife. Mr. Salvatore, you may now kiss your bride." He states. I feel Stefan's cool hand slip against my right cheek when he leans forward with Ben still in my arms and he kisses me gently, whispering in my ear ever so softly that, he's saving more of his kisses for me later.

"Congratulations!" Is shouted from the back as Stefan and I both turn around and hear a small crowd clapping, all four of them looking a little disappointed that they missed things. But, they're smiling as they come walking towards us. Ben wiggles out of my grasp and runs straight into her arms, shouting loudly. "Auntie Katherine!"

Katherine holds him tightly against her, kissing his cheeks and rubbing his back as I hear her tell him how handsome he looks in his matching suit. "Think we'd really miss this party?" Damon asks, pulling Stefan into a bear hug as winks over at me and tells his brother congratulations. "Hi, Mrs. Salvatore!" Katherine smiles, kissing my cheek as she whispers into my ear. "It's long overdue. But, you're finally a Salvatore."

I'm smiling through my tears, taking Ben back into my arms as Damon comes up to both of us and kisses me on the cheek. "I've got an awfully beautiful sister in law. Thank god!" He states with a grin, stepping aside for Caroline and Klaus to hug both of us too.

"How did you guys even know about us being here?" I ask Caroline after backing away from our hug and she grabs a hold of my hands, shrugging her shoulders. "We saw that no one was home and I found this, slipped underneath the doormat. It's a note, from Ben. All it says is, ask aunt Jenna. So, we asked Jenna and she told us that neither of you had wanted anyone else here. But, in true Klaus and Damon fashion. They decided to crash your wedding." Caroline shrugs as pulling me into another hug and she smiles while telling me once more how happy she is that Stefan and I finally figured things out.

After going out to dinner to celebrate and coming home. I take a seat next to Caroline outside on the patio, after putting Ben to sleep. I notice that she can see it, the tension and sadness in my eyes.

"I'd ask if you're okay. But, I can tell that you're not." She states, reaching out to take my hand as I accept it and squeeze her fingers. "It's that obvious? Isn't it?" I ask as she nods and we both exhale deeply. It's just the two of us sitting in silence until Katherine opens the sliding door and joins the two of us on the steps of the patio that Damon and Klaus built with their bare hands.

"Ben's asleep. Stefan's in your bedroom, laying down and talking with Damon and Klaus. They're catching up. It's been a long time…." Her voice trails off as I nod. We haven't been back to Florida in a little over a year and I can't remember the last time I had seen Caroline or Klaus. Sitting next to them now, I grab both of their hands. "I know we all had our ups and downs with each other. But, I'm thankful you're both here." I comment, smiling at Katherine as she smiles too and says in a soft tone. "I'm glad we're here too. I just wish that it would have been under different circumstances."

I nod, my eyes welling up with tears as I give them both a half smile. I have been trying to keep it together for everyone around me. But, I'm slowly start to lose it. My heart is dying alongside them as we all acknowledge the unwell look of fear and exhaustion on Stefan's face just hours after our little city hall stint, during dinner tonight. He got sick to his stomach and spent most of the dinner barely touching his food. "We should all call it an early night." Katherine suggestions with a smile, grabbing my hand into hers as she says in a soft tone. "So, that you can spend some much-needed alone time with your husband. Mrs. Salvatore." She tells me as I open my mouth to suggest something and before I can even mention it, Caroline offers first. "We can take Ben for the night. If you and Stefan want some…You know, real alone time."

I shake my head. As much as I'd love to spend the night in the embrace of my husband. I'd regret it forever if something happened to him while Ben was away and if Ben couldn't say goodbye to his father. My heart would be broken into a million little pieces. That's why before Ben went to sleep tonight, I made sure that he and Stefan spent some time together. Since we're taking every day and every hour of Stefan's life into account here. Everything being so unpredictable.

"It would be nice. But, realistically, it's not going to happen. I don't want Ben or Stefan out of my sight. You know, in case the inevitable were to happen…" My voice trails off as Caroline and Katherine nod. Caroline clears her throat, exhaling deeply before she says. "Elena, have you thought about what you're going to do. Once it happens? Will you stay in Seattle?"

Thinking about it breaks me. It kills my soul and shatters my heart. Although, like Stefan had told me just a few days ago, we need to acknowledge our new reality. My lungs are burning as I inhale sharply, attempting to control my emotions before I continue to talk about it. "Stefan wants to be taken to Florida, to be with all of you and his parents. So, when he gets sicker. The plan is to take him there so that he can be in his dad's house until the end. As for me and Ben. We're going to be staying here in Seattle for at least a few years. Until, I decide if I want us to move back or what to do next." I shrug my shoulders. I hadn't really thought about what my life will look like after Stefan's gone. Honestly, all of my attention has been placed on the needs of our son and how hard this is going to be for him and for me. Coping and dealing. Day by day.

"Why were you asking?" I turn towards Caroline, tilting my head to the side as Caroline glances down at her hands and shrugs her shoulders. She's quiet for a long time until she says. "It wasn't for any particular reason, really. Well, I guess…"

Rolling her eyes, Katherine slaps Caroline's shoulder and looks over at me awfully annoyed. "For the love of god, Caroline. Will you spit it out before I do?" She asks her, shaking her head as Caroline opens her mouth to utter out the words. But, Katherine quickly intervenes. "Because, her and Klaus are expecting. You know, babies! Two. In fact. Twins, actually. And, they want you to be one a godmother to one of their babies. So, they are going to need you and Ben to be living close by. Also, Damon and I don't want you to be living up here all depressed and lonely."

"What?" I shout out, smiling gleefully as Caroline wipes her eyes and smiles at me. "I wasn't going to say anything about it just yet. Because, of everything going on with Stefan. So, please don't say anything."

Clutching on to Caroline, I hold her close as I congratulate her and tell her how happy I am for her. "I won't. I promise." I vow, backing away and enjoying the small happiness in the moment with her.

Damon

"I'm not feeling so well…" Stefan utters out suddenly.

We're all sitting around the bed as my little brother stumbles into the room. He's sweating as he exhales deeply and Klaus jumps up. "What do you need me to do?" He asks, hastily moving towards me so that we can help put Stefan on the bed.

"It's fine." He waves him away in this stubborn manner as I shake my head. I can tell it's not, from what I noticed earlier in the afternoon when I had seen him, he looked pale and couldn't seem to catch a full breath and I know for a fact that during dinner this evening, he threw half of it up into the toilet.

"Are you having trouble breathing?" I ask him, taking a hold of his hand, noticing that to the touch it feels cold.

"Stefan, what the hell is going on?" I stammer out, panic riddling my tone and evident on my face as I stare at my younger brother and he places the oxygen mask over his face.

"I didn't want Elena to tell any of you. But…" His voice trails off as he breaths in deep and we can both tell that he's struggling, his breathing becoming labored. His face is fuller than before, and I can see that his legs and hands have swollen up along with his face. He's retaining water and it's probably gotten around his lungs too.

"Tell us what?" Klaus asks, taking a seat beside me as Stefan inhale sharply, coughing as he states. "I stopped taking my chemotherapy treatments completely a few weeks ago. I'm dying, Klaus. My body has slowly been shutting down and over these last few days, it's gotten worse. Elena has my pills- to end it all. If it gets too hard. The pain. Everything." He tells me as my eyes widen and I utter out. "Assisted suicide? That's what you want to do!"

I nearly loss my mind when he mentions killing himself! "There is another way!" I yell at him, allowing my anger to reach it's boiling point and just as I turn to storm out the door, Klaus's firm grip stops me. "Pull your fucking self together, man!" He sternly warns, telling me to step outside of my brother's bedroom with him. When I refuse to do it, Klaus drags me outside in the hallway by my upper arm.

"Who are you to make this choice for him?" He asks in a tone that's clearly boiling over with disappointment and anger. I don't understand much about it and I don't want him to do it. I don't want Stefan to die like this….

"You have no right to take this choice away from him, Damon! That isn't right and I swear to God that you need to pull your head out of your ass. Because, that man in there is dying and those pills are the only thing that can ease his pain. Yet, you're being a selfish asshole because you don't want to lose him. I get it, Damon! I don't want him to die either! I don't want put my best friend in the fucking ground because that's not what that man in there deserves. He deserves a full life, a happy one with everyone he loves by his side. Although, that is not how this is going to play out. So, put all of your shit with your brother aside. Let's go back in there, get his pills and make sure that the last few hours of his life are filled with love. Because, that's what Stefan needs right now. He needs you to stop being a selfish son of a bitch and be the big brother that we all know you can be!" Klaus exhales, wiping away tears from his eyes as I hear a heavy exhale coming from behind us and we both turn around to see Caroline, Katherine and Elena standing behind us.

"How's he doing?" Elena asks, a lump forming within her throat as she tries to add something to her question. But, the words escape her and instead, she grabs a hold of Katherine's hand for support.

"You knew! This whole damn time, you knew? He stopped his treatment and that he was dying and you fucking didn't say anything?" The rage I feel inside towards her, makes me lunge forward as Klaus pulls me back, shoving me against the hallway wall.

"Have some damn respect, Damon! You're not the only one-." I cut him off, my voice booming as I shove Klaus back and stare directly at him with an agitated expression across my face.

"I'm not the only one, what?" I shout out, my arm pressed against Klaus's chest as my other arm swings back and my hand makes a fist. Caroline screams for me to leave him alone. All of us stop dead in our tracks the moment we hear it. Stefan slamming his fist down against the bedroom door, glaring at us all.

"It's my choice! It's my decision to die by a physician assisted-death! It has nothing to do with any one of you! The choice of these, pills…They are mine and mine alone….." His voice trails off as he shakes the bottle in his hands and shakes his head at all of us. Attempting to catch his breath, he closes his eyes and catches himself against the door frame. Elena pushes her way between Klaus and I to get to my fragile and ill looking brother. Her eyes glazed over with tears.

"I didn't want to tell any of you because I knew that no one was going to agree with Stefan's wishes. This is what he wants. Damon, Klaus, Caroline and Katherine. We both know that none of you would have agreed to this had you known. But…" Stefan cuts her off as she wraps her arms around him and sobs into the curve of his neck.

"I know that you all want what's best for me and that none of you like seeing me this way. However, I can't do this anymore, guys. The chemo, the pills, the headaches, vomiting, feeling too weak and sick to be around my own family. To be with my son. I can't let you guys watch me suffer anymore. So, that's why I asked Matt to get me in touch with a specialist. I just…." Coughing, he slams his hand once more against the door as we all stop to look at him. He's practically become skin and bones. My once strong and full of life brother, looks like a skeleton of who he used to be standing in front of us. His hair has fallen out and his eyes are sunken into his head. He looks tired. Exhausted from life.

" Elena hates this too. Trust me. But, all I want is to be at peace. I can't fight this anymore." He stammers out, kissing the top of Elena's head as she closes the door to their bedroom and we all stand outside of it.

"You two should be ashamed of yourselves." Katherine sternly states, pivoting on her heels and stopping near the staircase. I watch as my wife takes a few steps down the stairs. But, stops just as the door opens back up and Elena steps out again. Tears streaming down her face as she goes to speak.

"I know that we're all struggling with this. I know how hard it is for every single one of you to accept his choice. Truth is, I'm not okay with this either. Because I know that none of us want to say goodbye or to lose him. But, this is his choice and as much as we don't agree with it. We need to respect that."

Caroline, who's been standing quietly, suddenly speaks. "What happens next?" She asks with a sense of fear in her tone.

Elena takes a deep breath, gripping the door handle as she leans her body against the door. "Stefan's already said his goodbye's to Ben. We decided that it was best if our son wasn't in the room for this part. So, to answer your question, Caroline. Stefan's going to take the pills and he's going to lay down. Eventually, he'll become very tired and sleepy- until he takes his last breath…." She tells us, ushering Katherine and Caroline in to say their last goodbyes as Klaus and I take a step away from one another- still standing silently apart. Anguish coloring both of our faces.

Stefan

"Don't cry." I tell her, grabbing a hold of her hand as she smiles down at me with tears streaming down her face. "I don't want to say goodbye to you." Caroline sobs, clutching on to me as I wrap my frail and weak feeling arms around her and hold her against me. I haven't started to feel the side effects of the pills yet. However, I know that it's going to happen soon and when it does, I won't be in pain anymore. I know in my heart that they don't agree with my choice. Although, I've been fighting this cancer for a while now and I'm exhausted. I can't fight anymore, and I don't want to.

"I'm going to miss you both so much." I tell Katherine and Caroline as I hold onto their hands and they both wipe tears from their eyes. There isn't a dry eye in the room as I hear Elena allow Damon and Klaus back into the bedroom to say their goodbyes to me because I can feel myself fading slowly.

"I love you, Stefan and thank you for everything that you've done for me." Caroline says as I kiss her hand and she backs away, letting Klaus take her spot. We both listen as Katherine's voice cracks when she says in a soft tone. "I'm going to miss you, my partner in crime. Thank you for letting me be one of your best friends and I promise that I'll take care of Ben, the best that I can." She tells me, leaning over and kissing my cheek as she whispers into my ear. "I love you, Stefan. Be at peace, now."

My brother and Klaus are crying too as they both tell me that they love me and how much I've impacted their lives. I tell them to watch over my son and to help him become the best man that I know he will be. I hear Klaus make me a promise that he and Caroline will watch over Elena as well. I utter out a nearly silent "Thank you" and just as the room was filled with my loved ones, it's emptied. Elena and I are left alone as she crawls into the bed with me, laying her head on my chest and clasping our hands together. I can hear the sadness and heartbreak in her voice as she tells me to close my eyes and rest.

"I'm going to tell you a story." She begins to say, my eyes close and my body begins to feel a bit weightless as I keep our fingers intertwined and listen to her words, allowing the images to take over my mind. "I, once met a young guy when I was just 24 years old and to this day, I'll never forget him. I was working at my aunt's dog grooming salon for the summer and unbeknownst to me, he was there to change my life…." My eyes flutter closes as I feel myself becoming at peace, a warm presence coming over me. The image of her in front of my eyes as I faintly hear her words…."I love you, Stefan. I always have and I always will. I promise that I am never going to forget you." I feel Elena's cool feeling lips press against my forehead and just as I breathe in…I exhale out a breath….One last time.