It's been a month since John found out I was still alive. A month of not doing much other than the usual- waking up, scavenging for food (mostly stealing, sometimes trading), pickpocketing Notes and stuff from gullible vendors, and wandering around Lake with Tess. I go to my family once a week to see if they're okay or if John has a request for me. I asked him the first time I went to him not to find me because it could end up being risky and it'd definitely make our mother and Eden suspicious. He doesn't ask for much- clothes, mostly, for Mom, sometimes parts or tools for Eden when he gets really creative. He never asks anything for himself. I have a feeling the extra Notes I slip to him he saves up to buy a real treat for them once he gets enough. So long they're happy, I'm happy.
I also told Tess what I wanted to do a month ago. She's been bothering me about it either since.
"Planning to do anything heroic today?" she asks when I wake up one day. It's close to summer now, the rain easing off a bit and the heat coming in bit by bit. I catch the roll of bread she tosses at me and take a bite of it. It's plain but soft. Fresh.
"Easy there, cousin. I'm still deciding what to do." It's true, in some way. I never forgot what John said and it comes back to haunt me whenever I'm idling. You be the soldier and I'll be the worker. Unlike him, I have nothing holding me back. I have nothing at stake. My family doesn't know about me and Tess wouldn't give me up to the police without giving herself up. It's the perfect time to do something big and hit the Republic where it hurts.
Besides, all of us in the poor sectors know how cracked the system is. Only the rich trots can't see that.
I pull out our stash of Notes and calculate what I can buy at the black market with them. Guns are always a good choice but they can be traced back to you so easily and it's a risk I can't take. Maybe a bomb or two. If I got those, we'd still have enough for food, unless I use the money for a disguise. I can't go out looking like myself. Anyone would be able to point me out. I stare at the Notes thoughtfully and drum my fingers against my good knee. Tess watches me.
"If they catch you," she says slowly, "they'll ask you for your name."
"They won't catch me. I know they won't and if they don't, they'll never know who did it." I take a careful amount from the stash and stuff them deep in the pocket of my pants. I stand up. "I'll be back tonight. Don't try to follow me, yeah? Just stay here and wait for me."
Tess reached for my arm. I turn to look at her. "You're really going to do it," she says softly. It isn't a question.
"Don't worry. I'll come back alive." I try to sound light but it does nothing to crack the tension on her face. I ruffle her hair a bit. "How about this- when I do come back, I'll tell you the name you can call me."
Her eyes light up a bit. "Really?"
"Sure." It's been long enough since I've been without a name. Only John ever calls me Daniel and while it sounds good when he says it, it won't feel natural coming from anyone else. Having nothing better to do isn't the only reason why I'm doing this- it's because I don't want to be nobody anymore. I'm ready to be somebody.
Somebody who can change this goddy system for good.
My father used to dream a lot. He wanted to do this, do that, hoped for John and me to be famous, hoped one day he would find a better job and get us a better home than the one we have in Lake. He cleaned up after the soldiers on the warfront and he was usually gone for weeks to months at a time. Whenever he does come back, he doesn't tell us much about what he does or sees. I asked him about it one time and he said it didn't want us to know. "It's a dangerous world out there," he told me once. "You should stay close to home if you can. Do good here. There's no light at the warfront and I want both my boys to walk in it. You understand me?"
Both John and I nodded and promised to never go to the warfront unless we had to. I'm breaking that promise by going there on my own free will.
I'm stowed away in a train on its way to deliver supplies to the warfront. That day I went to buy the bombs, the seller asked me what I was going to do with them. Buyers don't have to tell them and I didn't because I didn't know the answer. As I stowed them away safely in a location Tess didn't know, I made up my mind and immediately got ready. I didn't tell Tess where I was going but I was sure she would know where I'd be. John would miss me this week but there was always next week.
I did my own disguise this time and I think I did a good job. I snatched a bottle of half-used red hair dye to color my hair and a pair of cracked goggles in the corner of the train cart I'm in. The clothes I'm wearing are military personnel clothes, stacked and folded neatly in one of the crates I opened. The bombs are strapped onto my belt and hidden beneath my jacket. My knife is hidden in my boot and a spool of rope is in the other.
I also have a bottle of spray paint. Half-used, since I couldn't be bothered to waste Notes on a full bottle for something so little.
I close my eyes and listen to the train move. The capital of the Republic is Denver and that's where the warfront is. I remember my dad describing it once. He said it was as if it was always night because of the smoke and smog. There's barely any light. He used to say light meant goodness and darkness meant the opposite. The war between the Republic and Colonies brings nothing but badness. He wanted the fighting to stop but there is no way to stop. I hope to slow it down just a bit by what I plan to do tonight.
The train comes to a slow halt as it reaches the station. I jump off and run into the shadows before anyone can see me. I did some research down at the black market about the locations of various buildings down here and they were all right- it was easy to see what was what. The military buildings all had the Republic's flag flapping back and forth. Helicopters light the roads from above. Cars are moving in every direction, delivering either dead soldiers or fresh ones. I try to look for the building I'm looking for through the mess and manage to locate it. The Department of Intra-Defense is my target. I start running, keeping low and to the shadows.
My plan is simple. Vandalize the building. Destroy two airships. Don't get caught and leave. I've been through worse- much worse. This is going to easy. I keep up the positive momentum while I can because I have to live. I have to protect Tess and my family.
I climb the fence surrounding the building and crouch behind an airship. There are two in front of the building, ready for take-off at any time. I take a bomb from my belt and carefully make my way to the back of the ship. I attach it to the engine and press the button. The timer starts counting down from five minutes. The second bomb will detonate at the same time. I plan on using the explosion as a cover for my escape so that means I have five minutes to do what I have to.
I attach the second bomb to the other ship's engine and approach the building, avoiding security cameras on the way. I look up, scanning for the window to the main control room. Someone told me it was on the top floor of the eight-story building. It's easy to break into since it has the most windows facing the warfront. I take a few steps backwards and take a breath. I run and leap onto the wall, gripping it with my hands, using my feet to find footholds in the slight cracks in the wall. I scale it quickly, using my body to swing into the glass. It shatters from the force and I tuck my head in as I roll inside. I shake glass shards off of my clothes and start running. The security alarm rings right away. I have three minutes until they have the building surrounded. Four until they come up here and try to catch me.
I do whatever I can- shove my knife in control panels, kick machines until they start breaking or until a dent forms, anything that will do damage. I count the seconds down. Once two minutes pass and the place looks mostly trashed, I take the spool of rope out from my boot and tie it around the door knob to a maintenance closet. I start descending, using the sleeve of my shirt to hold onto the rope. I forgot all about gloves. I'll have to remember to grab a pair next time.
Soldiers and trucks are approaching the building when I reach the ground. One minute remains until the bombs go off. I take in another breath and dash toward the airships. I'm fast- I'm at the fence before anyone can reach me. I don't try to climb the fence just yet. I watch the soldiers approach, raise their guns, and prepare to shoot.
It never happens. The bombs detonate, rocking the ground, creating smoke and fire. I take the spray paint bottle and shake it quickly. I was going to do this inside the building but didn't have enough time. I spray my name on the ground and toss the bottle to the fire to add to it.
Then I turn to climb the fence and run.
A week has passed since then. I find myself sitting on the windowsill of our hideout, watching the ads roll across the JumboTrons in the distance. They're large and flashy, visible to me from this distance. I'm in my usual clothes again, the dye washed out of my hair, the goggles and clothes thrown away and left in a trash bin for someone else to wear. The only thing I kept from that is my knife and my name, the name Tess now calls me by.
She sits down beside me and looks in the direction I'm looking at. She can't read what the ads say very clearly and she squints with the effort. She gives up after a while and looks at me instead. "Waiting for something to pop up?" she asks.
I shrug, not wanting to admit that I am. I saw it once before when I wasn't really paying attention. I was walking through the streets with my head low and ears open to the usual chatter around me. Then everyone falls silent for a split second and starts whispering. I looked up to see what was happening and saw the ad.
On April 24, at 0129 hours a vandal known as "Day" vandalized the Department of Infra-Defense and set fire to two engines to two warfront airships.
10,000 Notes reward for any information.
Then a hazy image of my face appeared on screen. I had to bow my head again so no one could catch the smirk on my face. I knew I wouldn't be caught. I was right.
Something lands on my lap, startling me. It's a bag full of stuff to give to John. I didn't go last week and now I have to go this week. "John's waiting for you," Tess reminds me. I haven't introduced her to him yet but I should, especially if I'm going to continue with what I'm doing.
I stand and take the bag with me. "I'll be back."
"Make sure you are." Tess pauses for a moment. She adds, almost quietly, "Day."
The sky is dark, making my neighborhood almost indistinguishable in the darkness. I slung the bag over my shoulder and squeeze beneath the space in between the ground and the floorboards of my face. I hear Eden and Mom talking quietly. I don't hear John but I can tell he's there because the silence is heavier than usual. I whistle my signal to him, three low sounds that could be mistaken as a cricket. He hears it. The floorboards creak from his weight as he comes out to tell Mom where he's going. I crawl out from my hiding place and wait for him in the dark.
He crouches beside me. "You didn't come last week. I thought something had happened to you."
"Sorry. I just…had something else to do," I mumble. He hears the hesitation in my voice and immediately links it to the incident from last week.
"Wait. That was you?" his whisper is incredulous. "You're the one who did that? Is that why…?"
"Yeah. It is. Look, I'm sorry, but I'm here now, and this-"
"Daniel, I don't care about that stuff, I care about you." John grips my shoulders tightly. "If they find you they'll kill you. If they ever hurt you, I won't be able to forgive myself. I-"
"I won't let myself get caught," I say softly. "I'm not doing this just for you or me. I'm doing this for everyone. It's about time the Republic gets a taste of their own goddy medicine." A small, sad smile cracks John's tense expression and I smile back, just slightly.
"I've never seen this side of you," he says, "but I always knew you had it. You've got to live, I guess, while your blood is boiling. That's what Dad always said, right?"
I nod. I hand him the bag and he takes it, peering inside it briefly. He closes it and squeezes my shoulder again. "One more question. Why did you pick 'Day'? Is it something Dad used to say?"
I nod again. John pulls me in for a hug and I let him. He stands up and says good-bye and good night, heading back home. I stand and walk in the opposite direction toward Tess.
He used to say every twenty-four hours is a chance for you to do something good. Time is irredeemable so you have to do everything in the moment. You have to take things one day at a time.
It wasn't the first thing that came to my mind last week when I was writing my name on the ground. I always remembered what he used to say because what he says make sense. I want to live up to his expectations, and to my mom's, and to my brothers'. I want to be someone who can make a change, one day at a time.
My name is Daniel Altan Wing to my family but to everyone else, my name is Day.
Author's Note: All finished now! Thank you for the reviews and for sticking with the story! Leave a review about your thoughts- anything is appreciated!
Disclaimer: Legend belongs to Marie Lu. I own nothing but my words.