Legolas' pov:

I wake having slept for the first time in many months without dreaming. It is almost disorientating for the siren song of the sea seems to be muted today. I lie still for a few moments trying to ascertain where I am, and am surprised by a familiar but unexpected voice asking me to open my eyes.

I had not realized they were closed. I am disinclined to make the effort but the voice is insistent and so I do so, only to close them again as the light pains them so.

For a second time the voice entreats me to open my eyes. I do so more cautiously but have difficulty in focusing them on the shadowy shape beside me. He wants to know if I can hear him and I nod but that, it seems, is not enough so I finally make a great effort and whisper, "Yes Gimli."

And then I realize who it is who is speaking. Of course it is my dwarf, but when did he arrive in Ithilien? I do not recall his arrival. I frown trying to remember but everything is hazy, my thoughts skittering away. I find concentrating on anything almost impossible.
However my answer seems to please Gimli enough for he praises me for my efforts and then presses me to drink something which he is holding to my lips.

I do not want to swallow anything for eating and drinking merely makes me nauseous but Gimli is determined and so I swallow what I think must be warm milk but even that simple task exhausts me and even as I am trying to frame a question as to how Gimli is here with me I find myself slipping back into sleep.

My second awakening is less pleasant than the first. I find myself retching and heaving, my body attempting to rid itself of whatever it was I swallowed earlier. Once again Gimli is with me, holding the bowl, rubbing circles on my back and offering me words of comfort.

"Here now Lamb, let me wipe your lips and be rid of this bowl and then I will see about getting ye cleaned up a little. Do ye need to use the facilities?"

I nod wearily and attempt to stand but Gimli prevents it.

"No need, Lad I will see to everything. You just lie still and let me do what is needful for you."

I keep my eyes closed while Gimli does what is required as if by not seeing I can pretend the mortifying experience of having someone dealing with such personal needs are not actually happening to me. I should be grateful I know but all I can think of is how humiliated I feel and yet I have not the energy to argue or to do such things as are necessary for myself.

A clean sleep shirt is slipped over my head and the covers tucked in.

"I will not be a minute lad. Just lie quiet and I will soon be back."

He goes out on these words and I hear him moving about in the bathing chamber next door, before going to speak with someone who is in the main room beyond.

I lie still because moving just increases my feelings of nausea, and I try to gather my thoughts. This is not my bed chamber and yet it is familiar. I risk a quick peek and I am amazed to find I am in my rooms in Aglarond! How I got here I have no idea, but here I am, which explains why Gimli is also here for this is his home.

I doze again, and wake for a third time to find Gimli sitting beside the bed, reading. As soon as I move my head he stands and comes to me, taking my hand and squeezing it gently.

"Well now awake at last. How do you feel Lamb?"

"Tired, confused, surprised," I croak

"Tis little wonder. You know where you are though?"

"Aglarond, but how did I get here?"

"You came with Captain Galathil."

I frown for I have no memory of the journey.

"When?"
"Ye arrived yesterday."

"I do not remember."

"Well there is nothing to concern yourself with for now. All ye have to do is rest and build up your strength a little. There will be time to talk about how ye came to be here later."

"But …"

"It is not important Lamb! All ye have to do is concentrate on getting well. Do ye think ye might swallow a little clear broth, only the smallest amount? Just so we see if it will not upset your stomach."

I do not want to risk being sick again, but Gimli is obviously keen for me to attempt it so I allow him to spoon in a few swallows of broth and then wait for a short time. I fear my stomach will rebel, but it settles and I find myself feeling a little better although still bewildered.

What has been happening that has made me so unaware of myself or my surroundings? There is only one answer to that: the sea longing.

I have suffered from it since the day we took ship in the Pelargir. At first it was not so difficult to deal with it, for all I had to do was distract myself, and it would be subdued, but over the years the bouts have become more frequent and more severe. Although I have done my best to hide the worst effects from those who love and care for me, it has become more difficult to do so, so that I found it easier to avoid them rather than worry them over a situation they cannot change.

I made my choice years ago. I knew the risks and thought I was prepared for the consequences but it has been harder than I realized and more debilitating not just physically but emotionally as well.

The song I sang after the Battle at the Black Gate haunts my waking and sleeping hours now

To the Sea, to the Sea! The white gulls are crying,
The wind is blowing, and the white foam is flying.
West, west away, the round sun is falling.
Grey ship, grey ship, do you hear them calling,
The voices of my people that have gone before me?
I will leave, I will leave the woods that bore me;
For our days are ending and our years failing.
I will pass the wide waters lonely sailing.
Long are the waves on the Last Shore falling,
Sweet are the voices in the Lost Isle calling,
In Eressëaut, in Elvenhome that no man can discover,
Where the leaves fall not: land of my people for ever!

Days go by when I am caught in the thrall of the sea, when I know not what I am doing or where I am. My body has begun to be effected. I have lost weight, for my appetite is gone. My hands shake so that some days I cannot hold my bow, but no matter what I will keep my promise to Aragorn and remain in Middle Earth while he lives even though the last time he saw me he begged me to consider sailing West. I cannot do that. I have sworn an oath to stay with Gimli, until he goes to his long rest. As his adopted son it is my duty to deal with his obsequies and I will do it no matter the cost to my health.

Gimli re-enters and beams at me when he sees that I have somehow managed to keep the broth inside me at least so far.

"Well now Lamb, if ye are awake and intent on staying awake shall we talk? Have ye remembered how ye came to be here?"

My brow furrows, "I do not recall the journey at all except in the vaguest way, or even why I was coming here."

He sees my frustration at this and pats my hand.

"Well now ye came here because this is where ye needed to be! Ye have been suffering from the sea-longing have ye not, despite telling me that ye were well?"

I blush at this last comment for it is true enough. I did do my best to deceive Gimli, and deliberately kept from him how difficult my life was when I wrote my regular letter to him. I have done similar things with my own Adar. It is not something I am proud of doing, but worrying them when there is little they can do seems to be better at least it does for me. I suspect Gimli may take a contrary view.

"Can ye tell me why ye did that?"

I search my regrettably hazy memory, to divert the way the conversation is going and come up with a recollection of something Gimli said earlier.

"You said I came with Galathil?"

"Aye and Saellind as well."

Once again I wonder how I cannot remember about my journey here. What is puzzling and concerning is the fact that both Galathil and Saellind accompanied me here. I cannot think that I would have wanted them to both be absent from the colony at the same time as me.

"Why did they both need to come?"

"Ah now, well the fact that ye cannot answer that question yourself ought to give ye a clue, Lamb."

"I do not see how!" I grumble. "It has never been the practice for all three of us to be absent from the colony at the same time except at dire need …"

I stop then and look up at Gimli who merely raises his eyebrows as if that is sufficient. I frown once more doing my best to think through what need would send my two commanders off from Eryn gîl Ithil and then my clouded mind clears momentarily.

"They came because of me?"

"Aye lad. Ye had become so unwell that they took the decision to bring ye here to me."

"But they should not have done so!" bursts from my lips before I can prevent it, "they were under oath not to tell anyone about my … my …" I am unsure what to call it so merely say, "condition."

"An oath ye had no business making them take! And ye may take that scowl off your face Elfling, because they did not break their oatth since they didn't tell anyone. They merely brought ye to me, which tells me they have rather more sense than ye have shown" Gimli growls.

I glower as a large finger wags in my face.

And do not let me hear ye have taken either one of them to task for doing what was right or else ye and I will be having words! Think on!"

Since I am not in any fit state to withstand any kind of discussion or even words with my guardian I mumble that I will be careful what I say.

"Aye ye do that, and do not think I will not be watching to make sure ye keep your word! And if ye are thinking of being sneaky and doing something when I am not around I tell ye now, that should I get the merest hint of any such thing I will be writing to your father and telling him exactly what state ye are in and that ye have been keeping us both in the dark deliberately."

"You would not!"

The thought of my father being told of what is going on terrifies me for I know what he will say, what he has been saying these last few years, that it is time for me to take ship. So far I have avoided letting anyone else know this, for should Gimli or Aragorn get even a whiff of Ada's wishes, they would all work together to send me on one of the swan ships into the West and I am determined not to go, not while the last of my mortal friends remains on Arda.

Gimli gives me a ferocious glare.

"I will if it is necessary and do not think otherwise elfling! Now I am going to get ye some more broth and ye will do your best to swallow it all so we can begin your rehabilitation and then when ye are a little stronger we can talk about what should be done for the best."

"What do you mean?"

I fear I already know the answer and yet have to ask even so.

My dwarf takes my hand again.

"Ye canna go on as ye are Lamb. Tis no good pretending. The time has come for hard choices to be made. But that conversation can wait until ye are on the road to recovery which means plenty of rest, good food and doing as ye are bid. Are ye clear on that?"

So it is as I feared. Gimli, like my father, is already thinking and planning for me to sail. Well they will both be disappointed, but since there is benefit to be gained by arguing, I nod my head but am careful not to agree out loud to all that is being said. I do mean to keep my promise as far as the first part of Gimli's words are concerned, but no amount of persuasion or threats will change my mind as far as sailing is concerned. I will keep my oath to remain with my dwarven guardian until it is time for him to journey beyond the veil no matter the cost or the pain it may cause me.