chapter six: i want to teach you a lesson in the worst kind of way
Ninety Nine percent of the time, Rachel was cold. It came from being small, from not sleeping, from poor circulation due to smoking- or at least that's when the internet said.
But for the moment, she was the warmest she'd ever been, laying out in the sun, on a towel by the water, with cool fingertips tracing patterns on her back.
Rachel turned her head to the side, eyes opening slowly to regard Quinn, laying on her side next to her. Quinn was wearing sunglasses and a cut out one piece swimsuit that was the same shade of blue as the depths of the ocean.
"You're thinking," not a question, it was never a question from Quinn, she just understood how Rachel's mind worked.
"Tahiti is nice," Rachel said, raising up to her elbows and adjusting her bikini top, "I like it here."
"It's a magical place," Quinn agreed with a smile.
The wind blew a piece of Rachel's long hair into her face and Quinn brushed it away, tucking it behind an ear. Then she leaned down and kissed her, soft and slow.
"Let's stay here forever," said Rachel once they'd broken apart, "and get one of those huts over the water."
"I think those are in Fuji, babe," Quinn said, but she was still smiling, skin sunkissed and glowing.
Rachel rolled onto her back and reached up to touch Quinn's cheek, "Whatever, as long as we're together."
Quinn pushes up her sunglasses but stayed silent.
"I love you," Rachel added. And that's when she woke up.
…
With a groan, Rachel rubbed her eyes with one hand and fumbled for her alarm with the other. Once she managed to silence her phone alarm she pulled the blanket over her head with a groan, wishing herself back to sleep, back to dreamland where she could lay on the beach next to a swimsuit clad Quinn and not think about anything except when to reapply sunscreen.
After a moment, she dragged herself out of the slim bunk, brushing her hair and getting dressed. She'd driven the hour home to shower, her hair drying in the hour drive back. But her bed was dirty which made the whole thing feel like a waste.
Pulling on her jeans, something near the door of her truck caught her eye. Half hopping over, Rachel bent to pick up a small, white envelope. She opened as she finished buttoning her jeans. Inside was a single thick piece of paper that read, "I know what you did."
The world narrowed to the black typeface on white. Rachel felt like there was a giant rushing sound that filled her truck as she turned the card over, heart racing. There was a photo, one she'd never seen before but could easily read. It was a black and white photo, taken in a graveyard, of a single tombstone.
Here lies Coleman Wasserman; son, brother, a good man. 1979 - 2017
Beneath her tee shirt, her heart threatened to rip itself free. It felt like it was racing, and she couldn't catch her breath, but Rachel knew that if she checked her pulse it would be normal.
She wanted to scream, she wanted to cry, she wanted to show Quinn and let her make it go away, she wanted to run away back to her cabin where no one could find her.
But who could this be from? Only four people knew- her, Quinn, Jeremy, and Chet- and they'd all be sunk if one of them told. Except…
Rachel had told Dr. Simon. And he was still out there, somewhere, with that information and enough reason to hate her. He had tried to alienate her from Quinn, tried to tell her that he was the only one who cared.
"RACHEL TO SET NOW," Quinn's voice through her earpiece started her out of her thoughts. She'd have to deal with this later.
Grabbing her sweatshirt, Rachel opened the back of the truck and engaged her earpiece, trying to sound as neutral as possible, "Rachel flying in."
…
"Here at Everlasting we love breaking stereotypes," Graham said, "And this season, with Vanessa, our first bisexual suitress we want to show you that brunettes are the ones that have more fun."
Quinn groaned, "I'd like to break something of yours Graham."
One of the cameras panned across the backyard of the mansion, the aerial shot displaying the contestants lined up in workout clothes.
"Today our contestants must learn how to dance, in preparation of our ball," Graham continued walking over to where Vanessa stood next to an athletic dance instructor.
"When we were training to skate, Mike and I not only took skating lessons but also dance lessons so we could be our best on the ice," Vanessa said with a smile.
"Cameras on Michael and Troy," Quinn said into her walkie. Watching the screens, she admired Vanessa's poise and grace, smiling through her little talk about a career she'd single handed ruined not only for herself, but also her longtime partner. She was proving to not only be resilient but also obedient, which Quinn appreciated. A good little dancing doll.
"Camera A, push in on Vanessa," she said as Vanessa began speaking again.
"So today I've invited one of my old dance instructors to teach you all the finer points of the waltz," Vanessa said, walking over to an attractive and fit looking man, putting a hand on his arm. But the dance teacher flinched away.
Quinn sighed, and lifted her walkie, "Cut! Rachel, deal with twinkle toes."
"On it," was the staticky response, and onscreen Rachel darted across the lawn, pulling the dance teacher aside.
"Tell him if he doesn't get his act together," Quinn barked into the walkie, and by extension Rachel's earpiece, "That I'll sue him for breach of contract faster than he can plié!"
"Hey, so we're going to need you to at least pretend like you don't hate Vanessa," Rachel said, her voice being picked up by the nearest mic.
"My association to her is ruining my career as a serious dance coach!" He said, throwing his arms up.
On monitors one and four, Vanessa winced, still in earshot.
Rachel stepped closer to the dance teacher, "Listen," she said, voice low, "Helping us make Vanessa look good makes you look good. Can't you just picture the headlines? Dance Coach of Disgraced Skater Offers Second Chance?"
Quinn watched as the man ran a hand through his hair.
"Hey if you don't do it for her at least do it for Mike," Rachel said, "He's still here, it would suck for him if this tanked too."
"Alright. But for Michael, not for Vanessa."
"Okay were good, he's in," said Rachel into the comm.
"Places! And action!" And on Quinn's command they were filming again.
…
Instrumental, and royalty free, music filled the mansion, wafting through the main room, out by the pool where tea lights floated on the water and the contestants awkwardly tried to replicate the steps they'd learned hours earlier.
Quinn had instead that the contestants dance with one another, despite the rift that was beginning to form between the mostly straight male contestants and the very gay female contestants.
But a few people seemed to be having fun, as Madison made note of during the dance lesson.
"Quick, what information do you have on Becca and Robbie?" She asked Dr. James after dance lessons were over.
"Um lets see," Dr. James said she she flipped through her notes, "Robbie is a firefighter from Washington State, Becca is a student from California…"
"No like, what does it say about Becca's sexuality?"
"She's bisexual, like Vanessa," Dr. James glanced up, "What's this about?"
"I was thinking and I think I have to do something big if I want Quinn to take me seriously," Madison said, "And during dance rehearsals, Becca and Robbie seemed to be getting along really well- a little too well if you know what I mean."
"So you're going to set them up?" Dr. James asked.
"Exactly! It'll make good tv, no, great tv," Madison grinned.
"Do you need any help with this little scheme?" Said Dr. James.
"Actually, now that you mention it…."
…
"Hey, Rachel?" A whisper carried over the din or the ball, but it was soft enough that Rachel didn't register it at first.
"Rachel!" The voice tried again, and, this time, she turned. Half hidden behind one of the pillars was Kara, dressed in a long pink dress that shimmered every time she moved.
Rachel glanced around, checking to make sure she wasn't in view of any cameras or Quinn, before walking over to Kara.
"Hey, why aren't you out there dancing with everyone else? You look so great in that dress, has Vanessa seen you yet?" She said.
"That's the thing," Kara said, winging her hands nervously, "Some of the girls were talking about how there's going to be an overnight date and I don't know anything about… what girls do."
"Well the overnight date isn't for a while," Rachel said, "You don't need to worry about that right now, just enjoy the party."
Rachel stepped back, but only met the cold pillar, trapping her between bi-curious Kara and a literal hard place.
But Kara grabbed Rachel's hand, moving closer, "Can you just show me? Please Rachel? I really enjoyed your lesson earlier."
"I- uh-" Rachel faltered under Kara's big, doe eyed gaze and Kara's body pressing against her.
"What is going on here?" Quinn's voice broke through the rush and suddenly Kara was jumping away. But Quinn wasn't in the mood for waiting on an explanation, instead she turned on Kara.
"If I ever see you touch one of my producers again, I'll rip your extensions out and shove them so far up your ass that you'll barf blonde, is that understood?" Quinn snapped, twin spots of color in her cheeks.
Kara tried to nod and instead burst out crying, running from the alcove and up the stairs.
Shaking her head, Quinn lifted her walkie and said, "Madison, make sure Kara is presentable for the elimination ceremony," letting the button go she glanced at Rachel, still standing pressed against the pillar.
"Don't think you're off the hook, Goldberg. I will see you in my office after the elimination."
…
Standing on the sidelines, Madison watched Becca and Robbie dance. It had been so easy to get them together, it was ridiculous.
She'd started by pulling Becca aside for an interview.
"So, how's everything going?" She'd asked, camera pointed at Becca.
"Everything is really great," Becca had said, "It's been so great being here and getting to know everyone- especially Vanessa. We haven't talked much but she's really nice."
"That's great, yeah, how do you feel about the other contestants? Some of the other girls feel weird about the guys being here and vice versa,"
"Oh, no, the guys are great!" Becca said, "they've all been complete gentleman."
"You've gotten to spend some time with Robbie right? Because you were partnered for the dance lessons? He's pretty cute,"
"Yeah he's really- uh I mean I guess?" Becca's eyes flicked in between Madison and the camera.
"Hey it's okay, you can say he's cute, it's allowed," Madison said with a smile.
"Okay, he is pretty cute," Becca giggled, "And nice."
"And dancing with him?"
"Oh my gosh! It was so easy! Neither of us knew how to dance before but we just clicked!"
"Listen, Becca," Madison leaned forward, imitating the conspiratorial tone she'd heard Rachel taken on time after time, "I'm not supposed to tell you this but I heard Robbie talking and I think he really likes you."
Becca gasped, "Really? Is that allowed?"
"Oh yeah it's fine, we love love at Everlasting, the more the better," said Madison, "True Love should really conquer all, don't you think?"
"Yeah," Becca smiled, "Actually I do."
…
On camera, Vanessa twirled around the room with ease, making it look like Troy was leading as she pulled him through the waltz. But it reality, tension knotted her shoulders, something she'd been feeling more often than not.
It was one thing to go through the drug test, the interviews, the rehab, but pretending to enjoy herself as she fake-dancing with an aggressive and bigoted homophobe? It was enough to want to make her jump in the pool and never resurface.
Thankfully, that's when the music came to a close, ending the dance.
"I think I'm going to go get a drink," Vanessa said to Troy, glancing around for an escape.
"I can get it for you," Troy said, taking her arm, "I am your date tonight, after all. Maybe after that we can find someplace quiet."
He waggled his eyebrows at her in a completely lewd fashion. Vanessa's smile grew strained.
"Actually I think I need to chat with some of the others here, I don't want to neglect my suitress duties," she said, not looking at him. She was looking for Mike still, hoping he was close by, but instead he was on the other side of the room, chatting with an older blonde woman. Somewhere in the recesses of Vanessa's mind she remembered that the woman's name was Catherine.
"What about your duties to me?" Troy asked, his grip tightening on her arm. Vanessa visibly tensed.
"Hey can I steal you for a sec?" a soft hand slipped into Vanessa's and she looked up to see Chloe smile at her.
"Yes! Sorry, Troy, I have to go," Vanessa said quickly untangling herself from his grip.
"Thank you so much," she whispered as she and Chloe walked away.
"He's a dick," Chole said and they giggled, "Plus you looked hella uncomfortable."
"Yeah, his comments yesterday about me weren't the most endearing,"
Chloe snorted, "That's putting it lightly!"
"Anyway," Vanessa shrugged, "I like your hair. The flowers are pretty."
"Thank you!" Chloe touched one of the flowers that had been tucked into her afro, "It was the stylists idea really, but I like it."
Vanessa leaned against Chloe's shoulder, interlacing their fingers, "So tell me about yourself, do you always go around rescuing damsels in distress?"
…
"Madison! Make sure Kara is presentable for the elimination ceremony," Quinn's voice ordered through her earpiece. Madison sighed, taking a deep breath before replying with a short, "On it."
But she had no plans to go find Kara and fix whatever mess she was sure was Rachel-related. Instead, she walked around the edge of the dance floor, out of the cameras view, and found Becca.
"Hey so Robbie wants to meet you in there?" the last word went up into a question as Madison pointed across the pool to the little bathroom located there. It was the same place they'd locked Yael out of two seasons ago, an incident that was still only spoken of in hushed tones.
"Oh," Becca giggled, "Okay, thanks Madison!"
With Becca in motion, Madison darted over to Robbie, relaying the same information. Earlier that day, Madison had made sure that he was in ear shot as they talked about how Becca was super into him. And he'd just taken the bait, hook line and sinker.
"C'mere, c'mere," she whispered to a couple of the camera people, pointing them at the bathroom door as Vanessa rounded the pool, arm in arm with Chloe.
"Uh what's going on?" Vanessa asked, exchanging glances with Madison and Chloe.
"Maybe you should open the door?" Chloe offered, "All the cameras are pointing there anyway."
"Zoom in on Vanessa," Madison instructed as the suitress reached for the doorknob.
But the sight behind the door was better than Madison had planned. Becca was pressed up against the wall, legs wrapped around Robbie's waist as they kissed. Her hands were in his hair, lipstick smearing and her dress pulled up in a very compromising way.
"Holy shit," Chloe said, "That was not what I was expecting."
"Fuck!" Robbie half dropped Becca as the two stumbled out, more onlookers and camera crew members joining Vanessa.
"It's not what it looks like!" Robbie said.
At the same time Becca said, "This looks so bad but Vanessa just listen-"
Vanessa held both her hand up, "Just stop."
"What is happening? What did you do?" Quinn hissed as she joined Madison.
"I made this happen- look! It's great!" Madison beamed.
"And where is Kara? I needed you to get her ready for elimination ten minutes ago!" Quinn said, then when Madison didn't move, pointed at the mansion, "GO!"
…
"Tonight's ball has been a dream, but like all dreams it has to come to an end- as the the journey for three of our contestants," Graham said, walking up to stand beside Vanessa and the podium that held twenty portable cell phone chargers.
"But for those staying, they'll receive one of these useful Praxis cell phone charges, perfect for recharging your phone on the go. Praxis, there for you, wherever you are."
Jay rolled his eyes, commenting under his breath, "That's kind of ironic, considering we take their phones on day one."
"Vanessa," Graham said, "Have you made your decision?"
"Thank you Graham, I have."
And with that, Vanessa began to call out names, one by one, handing them a charger as they approached. Soon there were only three, Troy, Becca, and Robbie.
"Camera B push in on Troy," Rachel's voice could be heard softly on the radio, "Camera C on Becca and Robbie."
"Becca, Robbie, can you step forward please?" And when they did, looking disheveled and sheepish, she continued, "Everlasting is a place to find love, and you have, for which I commend you. But while I'm happy for your happiness, I don't see where I'd fit into it. I wish you all the best, but it's time for you to leave."
Fortunately for Vanessa, but unfortunately for Jay and the other producers, Becca and Robbie didn't put up a fight and simply hung their heads before walking off.
"Troy," Vanessa began, then paused. The cameras zoomed in on her.
"This is bullshit," Troy snapped, "You're such a stupid gay bitch that you don't even know a real man when you see one!"
"And that kind of talk is exactly why you're going home tonight. Your homophobia and biphobia is appalling, not to mention that you got into a fight with Mike! Despite everything that's happened between us, he's still a dear friend."
"This whole place is rigged!" Troy yelled as two security guards grabbed him by the arms.
"No shit," Jay muttered under his breath.
"I'm going to get you, you faggy bitch!" Troy snarled as he was dragged past Rachel.
"That's not even the right kind of gay!" she called back.
…
"You wanted to see me?" Rachel asked as she slipped into Quinn's office. She was hesitated by the door, sheepishly knowing that she'd done something wrong.
Quinn regarded her for a moment; Rachel bit her lip, looking anywhere but at Quinn, skittish and back still pressed against the closed door. Quinn imagined Rachel's heart pounding through her skin, what the feeling of it would be under her wrists, under the tattoo that they shared.
Quinn stood, crossing the room to stand in front of her. Reaching past Rachel, she locked the door, invading her space in the process. They stood toe to toe, Quinn nearly going cross eyed as she stared down at her, sharing breaths.
"Stop fucking the contestants," Quinn said, a storm hidden under her scary calm. She reached up and Rachel shut her eyes, as if she was preparing for something rough. But Quinn gently hooked her index finger under her chin, letting her thumb softly graze Rachel's lip.
Quinn's eyes settled on her mouth, watching as Rachel whispered, "Why are you doing this?"
"Because you need it. Face it Goldberg, you need someone to fuck to get it out of your system. And if this is what it takes to keep you from derailing the show again, you can fuck me."
She moved her hand, resting a fingertip on Rachel's lips as an invitation. Rachel accepted, carefully taking her finger tip into her mouth. Quinn forced her expression to remain neutral as Rachel's tongue circled her finger, teeth softly capturing the digit. Rachel was staring at her, and it was one of the most erotic things Quinn had experienced in a long time. Heat pooled in her stomach, face warming, and her suddenly too many layers of clothes feeling itchy against her skin.
Then Rachel released Quinn's finger and grabbed the lapels of her jacket, pulling her in to kiss her. Quinn shut her eyes, parting her lips immediately to submit to Rachel's kiss. They kissed until Quinn couldn't breathe, causing her to pull away first with a sharp gasp.
"So this means nothing to you?" Rachel asked.
"Nothing at all," said Quinn.
Liar, liar, liar, the word pounded through Quinn. She watched Rachel search her face for any signs of her lie, but Quinn lied for a living. She practically invented it.
Rachel kissed her again, rougher this time, like she wanted to devour her. She tasted like champagne and the gnawing ache of desire that shown through in her wild eyes and burned hot in her hands that had moved to grip Quinn's waist.
"Couch," Rachel said, voice raspy, lips barely leaving Quinn's, as she pushed the jacket from Quinn's shoulders.
They maneuvered their way to the couch, kissing the whole way, and Rachel pushed Quinn onto her back, so she lay lengthwise. Then she nimbly straddled Quinn's waist, weight against her hips.
Rachel's hands found the edge of Quinn's blouse, tugging it up and off.
"Bra, off," she ordered in between dizzying kisses. Quinn raised herself up on one elbow, unhooking her bra and dropping it to the floor. Quinn found Rachel's commanding attitude a surprising turn on; letting go of her control of the situation was only a farce- her features still schooled to remain unmoved- but submitting to Rachel's command felt easy and dangerously right.
Rachel bent to kiss the dip of Quinn's collarbone, kissing her way down, leaving wet marks in the valley between Quinn's breasts. Quinn forced herself still, telling herself over and over that it meant nothing, she couldn't get lost in Rachel's touch, couldn't give into the blossom of emotions that filled her chest- of the desire that shot straight to her core.
Quinn inhaled sharply as she felt Rachel's mouth close around one of her nipples and her thumb brush against the other. Her hands went to Rachel's hair, fingernails grazing her scalp.
She was never loud during sex, instead she was normally an array of little noises, gasps and grunts, usually masked by hiding her face in the shoulder of whatever man was underneath her. With Rachel however, Quinn struggled to suppress every moan that threatened to push past her lips and wondered if it was possible to come just from the mere sensation of Rachel's mouth on her flushed skin.
Quinn had thought she could do this, she had idiotically thought that she could have sex with Rachel and not let it effect her.
Rachel moved slowly, kissing her way back up to Quinn's throat. Her lips found the place where Quinn's neck met shoulder and after a soft kiss, sucked hard, teeth grazing the tender skin.
Quinn cried out, not in plain, although it did hurt, but in utter pleasure. Her body arched up, pressing against Rachel's as Rachel repeated the action. Moans filled the room, turning to uninhibited begs, and unholy words of lust spilling from her tongue like a prayer. And Rachel was her goddess.
She wasn't even sure of what she said, but suddenly Rachel's hand wrapped around Quinn's throat. It wasn't firm enough to block air, but it was enough to get her attention.
"Stop lying to me," Rachel hissed, forehead resting on Quinn's, "Stop being a coward and just admit that this means as much to you as it does to me."
Then, with a flush of cold air, Rachel climbed off of her and was out the door before Quinn could reply. Rachel was gone and Quinn still lay half naked on the couch. With a shaky sob, she covered her face in her hands, only indulging in a few moments of weakness. Then she wiped her mascara and got up, collecting her clothes from the floor and pouring herself a drink.
It had been ridiculous of her to think that she could let Rachel's fire consumer her and not get burned.