The Chance of Love

Chapter 10

"We will never know why we were chosen by fate to perform all the rites that turned love into hate."

Ice age.

That's how Thorin would describe his relationship with Bilbo. It could be worse, but it was already bad enough. Ever since that little argument of theirs about telling the truth and breaking up with certain people, things got bad between them. Bilbo did his best to ignore him as much as possible, only speaking to him when necessary. Thorin knew that if they had a couch he'd be sleeping on it. Luckily Bilbo wasn't that cruel to make him sleep on the floor.

But with the way things were going, one of them would have to leave the bed to the other one.

"You're late," Bilbo accused the moment Thorin stepped through the door. At least it was some sort of a greeting he thought as he closed the doors behind him. He was tired, he had a long day, and spend the last hour in the library looking for the books he needed. All he wanted to do was have some dinner and go to sleep. Maybe if he doesn't allow Bilbo to provoke him to start a fight, he won't have to put Theodore to bed.

"Hey! I'm talking to you," called Bilbo as he snapped his fingers in front of his face to get his attention.

Thorin shook his head as he lost his thought. "I heard you."

"Good. Then you know that you're late," repeated Bilbo.

Thorin wanted to say something back when Bilbo walked back to the kitchen, but stopped himself when he saw they weren't alone. His blood started to boil and he clenched his fingers into a fist.

"We can go," smiled Bilbo at Adrian, who was sitting at the table with Theo, helping him color his drawing. "Bye, Pumpkin," said Bilbo as he pressed a kiss to Theo's head. "Be good for daddy."

Theo nodded before he focused back on the paper in front of him.

"See you soon, little man," said Adrian.

"Say goodbye to Adrian," Bilbo told Theo, as he accepted Adrian's hand.

"Bye," said Theo absentmindedly.

Adrian just smiled and squeezed Bilbo's hand, telling him to let go. He could feel the tension between Bilbo and Thorin, and he would bet Theo's behavior was just a reflection of the relationship between his parents.

Bilbo sighed before he turned to Thorin. "Dinner is in the oven, if you want it. Theo already ate," he informed him curtly before pulling Adrian to the door.

"Don't worry, I'll bring him back in one piece," Adrian told Thorin, but before the latter could say something back Bilbo had already closed the door behind them, leaving him alone with their son.

Thorin closed his eyes for a moment and let out a sigh. There was no point of getting angry over this. Bilbo had every right to do as he pleases. And if that meant going out with Adrian Thorin won't say anything about it, even though the thing he wanted to do most was beat the guy until he wouldn't be able to stand anymore and then tell him that Bilbo is his and only his.

He walked over to his son and pressed a kiss to his head before sitting down next to him. Ever since he and Bilbo started ignoring each other Theo started to do the same. "Hey buddy, will you tell me what are you doing?" He leaned closer to get a better look at what Theo was currently coloring. "Who is this," he asked as he pointed to what Theo drew as a person.

"Nana."

"And this?"

"Grandpa."

"And the other two?" Theo pointed to the bigger figure and told him that was him and the little figure was Frodo. "And where am I, and where is Papa?" Theo shrugged as he continued to color his dress in orange. Yes, Theo drew himself in an orange dress. "Are you going to draw another one where it's just us?"

Theo shook his head in response. "Want Nana." Thorin knew that whenever Theodore wanted Bilbo's mother something was wrong. Belladonna was a safe haven for Theo and always gave him cuddles and showered him with affection until he felt better.

Thorin sighed and stood up. He went to the kitchen and reheated the dinner Bilbo left for him. It was a quiet evening and Thorin wasn't used to the silence, especially when Theo was around. They ate in silence. Even though Theo already had dinner, he kept opening his mouth, waiting for Thorin to share his dinner with him. Not that Thorin minded. Bilbo left more than enough food for both of them.

After they finished eating Thorin joined Theo at the table. He did some school work while Theo continued to color in absolute silence. When it was time for Theo to be put to bed, he changed him into his pajamas and helped him wash his teeth before he put him down for the night. A yawn escaped him after he turned off the lights off next to Theo's bed. With everything that has happened, he has forgotten how tired he was, so he decided to go to bed as well. He was fast asleep the moment he laid down.

:::

Bilbo came back around two in the morning. Thorin heard him because Bilbo managed to wake him up with all the noise he made while he tried to get ready for bed. He saw him check on Theo before he joined him under the covers. Even though Thorin needed to know how the date with Adrian went, he bit on his tongue and forced himself to stay quiet and pretended to be still sleeping.

The morning came too soon for Bilbo. He was up late last night so he decided to skip his first class to get an additional hour of sleep. He turned around to make himself comfortable again when he heard voices coming from the kitchen. Of course, how could he forgot. Theo and Thorin were there, together, like they always were in the morning.

He pushed himself up and rubbed his sleepy eyes.

"Mornin'," he said, his voice still thick with sleep. "Where are you going?" he asked when he noticed that Thorin put shoes on Theo.

"We're going out," informed him Thorin without looking at him.

"So you're going to take him out so you don't have to deal with me?" Bilbo asked.

"We go out to play every morning," answered Thorin as calmly as he could. "Not that you ever bothered to find out what we do in the morning." Bilbo just stared at him. "What? Did you think I just sit with him all morning and wait for you to return?" He helped Theo off the chair and took his hand. "We'll be back in an hour," he told him. "You should go back to sleep. You look like you need it."

Bilbo just stared back at him, fuming inside. "Asshole," he yelled after him and in frustration threw the pillow at the door where Thorin was standing just a moment ago, before he slumped back on the bed.

He was not going to allow Thorin to win this. Never.

:::

Thorin tried to stay calm as much as he could, but he could only take so much of Bilbo yelling at him for everything. It looked like he was trying to provoke him to start a fight. Thorin really had a feeling Bilbo was doing all this just to make him angry, but he wasn't going to allow him to get his way.

"We should call a truce," he suggested one evening when he and Bilbo were making dinner.

"What?!" Bilbo couldn't believe what he just heard. Did Thorin just propose a truce. This is just one of his little tricks, his mind supplied. He's doing this so he can trick you into believing he's a good person. Which he's not. He insists that he loves you, yet he stays engaged to someone else. Under no circumstance you can believe him.

"I think we both realized this isn't working. We can't live like this."

"You aren't serious, are you?"

"It's affecting Theodore, you must have noticed that," pointed out Thorin.

See, he's playing dirty. He dragged Theo into this. Do not believe him, he's trying to trick you. "He's fine."

"No, he's not fine. He's quiet and withdrawn. He knows we're fighting and he probably feels guilty for that, that's why he behaves."

"So what are you going to do? Run back home? We knew this was going to be hard, yet you agreed to it."

"I'm not going back home, but I don't think it's healthy for us to live together. We either fight or ignore each other. If this was just about us I would happily stay, but I can't do that to my son. He needs a happy home, not two people who are prepared to kill each other to prove they are right."

And that was it. Now Bilbo knew for sure that Thorin knew what he was trying to do. This was just one of his tricks to get him to submit. To dump Adrian while he stays happily engaged to Dana. But he was willing to play along, just to see what Thorin had in mind. "And what do you propose we do?"

"I'm going to move out." Bilbo's jaw dropped at Thorin's announcement. "I already asked for another room. I won't be alone. I'll have, I think three roommates, but I can live with that."

Bilbo just stared at him for a couple of moments. "And where will Theo and I live?"

"You can stay here, if you want. Nothing will change. I'll still take care of Theo in the mornings and you get to watch him in the afternoon. And this way, if you want to invite Adrian over I won't be in your way."

"You have got to be joking!"

"I think it's for the best."

"This isn't funny, Thorin. No one thinks this is funny," fumed Bilbo. "If you think this little game of yours will make me leave Adrian, you're mistaken. He's a ten times better person than you are!"

"And that's why I invited him to come over."

"You did what?!" exclaimed Bilbo. This was the last thing he expected from Thorin.

As on cue someone knocked on the door and Thorin greeted the guest.

"Wasn't expecting you here, mate," said Adrian to Thorin as they shook hands, while Bilbo just stared at them.

"Yeah, I was just explaining to Bilbo that you two will have the evening for yourself. Haven't really gotten to that part where I tell him I apologized and that everything is good between us."

"Don't look so stunned babe," said Adrian as he walked over to Bilbo and wrapped his arms around his waist. "I knew that Thorin was mature enough to accept that you're dating me now."

Bilbo tore his gaze away from Thorin to look Adrian in the eyes. He seemed very pleased with himself, and Bilbo found that very unsettling. But when the taller man leaned down to kiss him, he returned the kiss, trying to forget that the love of his life was standing in the room, watching them.

Thorin cleared his throat and they broke apart and Adrian offered the same smile to Thorin as he offered a moment ago to Bilbo.

"I- We should go. The show I'm taking Theodore to starts at nine and we have to get something to eat first." He pulled Theo from his toys and helped him get dressed. "We'll be back around eleven." Thorin informed Bilbo and Adrian.

"I'll make sure I won't be here when you return," smiled Adrian.

Thorin allowed Bilbo to say his goodbyes before taking Theo's hand and leaving the two lovebirds alone for the evening. It broke his heart to watch Bilbo melt into another guy's embrace, but he knew it was the right thing to do.

:::

He came back a few minutes before eleven with sleeping Theo in his arms. He hoped that Adrian already left, because no matter how polite he wanted to be he still didn't want him see kissing Bilbo in goodbye. Actually, he didn't want to see him at all.

He entered a dimly lit room, with Bilbo sitting on one of the kitchen chairs in his pajamas. He had his arms wrapped around his knees and was so lost in his thoughts, he didn't even hear them enter.

"We're back," whispered Thorin, not wanting to wake Theo, but loud enough to pull Bilbo from his trance.

"I was worried something happened to you," quickly said Bilbo as he took Theo from Thorin's arms. The tone he used with Thorin was completely different from a few hours ago.

"We're both fine," smiled Thorin. "I think Theo had a very good time."

"I'm glad you both enjoyed it. Don't worry, I'll change him for bed," said Bilbo before he hurried to the bathroom.

Thorin ran a hand over his face. At least nothing has changed, he thought. Bilbo looked fine, so nothing important happened between him and Adrian, which was good to know. He let out a sigh and sat down on the bed. Something felt odd. Something was different. Without realizing it, he ran his hand over the covers of the bed.

Wait!

This weren't the covers they slept in last night. In fact, he was sure the covers they slept in were still on the bed when he left. Which only meant one thing. Bilbo changed them and Thorin didn't have to think twice to know why Bilbo did that.

"Everything alright?" Bilbo asked when he returned to put Theo down.

Thorin started at the changed sheets for a moment, feeling Bilbo's eyes on him. "Yeah, everything is fine. I'll move my things out tomorrow while you have classes. That way when you return you won't even know I was here," was the last thing he said before he disappeared into the bathroom not giving Bilbo a chance to say something back.

Not willing to fight with Thorin, Bilbo let it go. He climbed under the covers and fell asleep before Thorin returned.

:::

Moving out shouldn't be this hard, but it pained Thorin to move every box of his stuff to his new room. At least he had Theo to keep him company the whole morning, happily trailing behind him and helping carry some small things. At least he was smiling again, thought Thorin when they came back for the last box. Now all he had to do was make himself comfortable in his new room.

Other than him living in another room nothing was supposed to change.

But sadly it did.

He went to pick up Theo like every morning. He knocked on the door and waited for Bilbo to answer.

"Oh, good, you're here. I was hoping you would arrive a few minutes early. Just wait here," Bilbo told him quickly before he ordered him to wait at the door. Thorin immediately knew something has changed because it was the first time Bilbo didn't invite him in.

Thorin watched as Bilbo pulled something out of the closet and then brought it to him. "Found this in the laundry basket. I believe it's yours."

"Yes, it is. Thank you," said Thorin as he accepted the pile of clean clothes. He completely forgot about those.

"Theo will be with you shortly. We just finished breakfast so he's brushing his teeth."

"No problem, I can wait."

They stood at the doors awkwardly for almost a minute before Bilbo shifted on his feet and spoke. "I've been meaning to ask you something…"

"Yes?"

"Well, I was wondering… What I wanted to ask you is… Can I get the key back?"

"What?" asked Thorin, who was caught completely unprepared.

"Well you don't live here anymore, so I don't really see a reason why you should have a key to this room. Now you have all your stuff and Theo almost never asks for anything that would require for you to have a key."

Thorin stared at him for a moment. "Yeah, you can have it back."

"Could you give it to me now?"

"Now?"

"Yes, now. Like I said, you don't need it anymore and I would really like to have it."

Thorin reached into his pocket, annoyed that Bilbo wanted to have the key back, when the bathroom door opened and Theo came running out. Followed by Adrian, who was sporting the same smile as his son.

"Hey mate. How are you?"

Thorin wanted to snap at him that they weren't 'mates', that they weren't anything, that just because he's allowing him, yes, allowing him, to date Bilbo that doesn't mean he has to like him. He wouldn't have to do much to get Bilbo back and that annoying prick should be aware of that. But instead of wasting his breath on Adrian he turned his attention to Theo, who was back to his normal self. Smiling and full of energy as he ran to Thorin and waited to be picked up.

"Someone is in a good mood," he commented as Theo continued to smile at him.

"We can go play!"

"Yeah, we can go," confirmed Thorin and Theo beamed. "You want him back at two, right?" asked Thorin for confirmation as he turned around to leave.

"Yes."

"Okay. We'll see you then."

"Thorin," said Bilbo, halting his step.

"Yes?"

"They key."

Thorin looked at the Bilbo, who took a step closer, his arm stretched out. Bilbo wasn't kidding, he wanted they key back and Thorin had no other choice but to give it to him.

"Thank you," said Bilbo before he pressed a kiss to Theo's cheek. "I'll see you at two," he told his son before he and Thorin left.

:::

"When daddy back?" Theo asked while he was having a bath. Bilbo was sitting on the tiles next to it, staring absent-mindedly into the distance while Theo played in the warm bubbly water.

"Papa!" Theo's splashed the water all around, wetting Bilbo's face and shirt and finally pulling him from his thought.

"Hm? Sorry baby, I wasn't listening. What did you ask me?"

"When daddy back?"

Bilbo needed a moment to gather his thoughts. "Daddy didn't go anywhere. You still see him every morning," he pointed out.

"He not sleepy here."

"No, he's not." Bilbo drained the water and then rinsed the remaining soap off Theo, before wrapping him in a towel and drying him.

"Why?"

"Why what?" asked Bilbo, not knowing what Theo wanted to know now. He had to admit that he wasn't really paying attention to what was happening because his thoughts kept drifting to other things.

"Why daddy not sleep here."

"It's complicated."

"Want daddy."

Bilbo sighed as he helped Theo get dressed for bed. "You'll see him in the morning, now it's time for you to go to bed. You can have a story, but then you have to go to sleep because it has been a long day and I'm tired."

"Want daddy!" Theo repeated and Bilbo knew that this was just a beginning. There will be a tantrum and the only one that could prevent it was Thorin. But Bilbo wasn't going to call him.

"You'll see him in the morning," Bilbo repeated calmly. "Come on, let's get you to bed." He wanted to take Theo's hand, but the two-year-old just looked angrily at him and ran to his bed. "Theo!"

"Want daddy!" Theo cried when Bilbo followed him.

"And I told you that you'll see him in the morning," Bilbo snapped at him angrily even though he didn't want to. Theo looked at him, visibly upset and with eyes filling with tears, before he turned away from Bilbo.

Bilbo sighed and sat down on the bed next to his son and gently rubbed his back as Theo continued to sob quietly. "I'm sorry. There was no need for me to yell at you," apologized Bilbo. "Would you like me to read you a story?" Theo shook his head. "Would you like some cuddles to make you feel better?"

"Want daddy," Theo said between sobs.

"Can't do that," said Bilbo before he stood up and left Theo to go to sleep.

:::

He was woken up in the middle of the night by the sound of someone crying. But Theo wasn't just crying. When Bilbo turned on the lights and looked at his son, he saw how frightened Theo looked. He was curled up together clutching to his plush bunny. He was shaking and having trouble breathing normally and the moment Bilbo saw him, he was up from the bed pulling him in his arm.

"It's okay," he soothed as he rocked him gently, trying to calm him down. "I'm here. Nothing's going to happen to you. Theo look at me." He lifted his chin so that Theo would look him in the eyes. "I'm here and I'm not going anywhere. Now take a deep breath… good boy," Bilbo praised as he pulled him even closer, trying to protect him from whatever it was that upset him so much.

After a couple of minutes Theo's breathing became normal and even though he was still clutching Bilbo's shirt he appeared to be doing much better. Bilbo kissed the top of his head as they continued to sit in silence. Only when Theo relaxed in his arms, he decided to speak.

"Did you have a bad dream?" Theo nodded an snuggled into Bilbo's chest. "Why didn't you wake me? Even if are angry at each other that doesn't mean I don't love you. If you need me, I'll always be there. Do you understand?" Theo nodded again and Bilbo pressed another kiss to his head.

"Want daddy," Theo demanded as he looked up to look Bilbo in the eyes.

"You can't go to daddy now. He's sleeping. You'll see him in a few hours when he wakes up."

"Don't want to. Want daddy. Now."

Bilbo sighed when tears started running down Theo's cheeks once again. "Was the bad dream about daddy?"

Theo nodded. "See daddy?"

"We can't see daddy right now because he's sleeping. You'll see him when you wake up. Come on, it's time for bed. You can sleep with me," Bilbo offered, but Theo was having none of it. He continued to cry until Bilbo gave up, lifted him in his arms and took him to see Thorin.

He had an idea where Thorin's room was so he was mostly relying on Theo's instructions.

It was in the middle of the night when he knocked on the door, hoping that someone will hear them and open up. "I think they are all sleeping," said Bilbo after almost fifteen minutes of knocking. "You'll have to wait until morning."

"Daddy!" called Theo and knocked on the door, but Bilbo immediately shushed him and crouched in front of him. "You can't yell, people are still sleeping."

"Daddy's there," said Theo as he pointed to the door.

"Yes, but others-" Bilbo was interrupted when the doors suddenly opened and before he could say anything Theo disappeared into the dark room. "Sorry," he quickly apologized as he pushed past the man and followed his son. "Theo!" he hissed when he saw him disappear into one of the rooms. But when Bilbo caught him a few moments later he already had his arms around Thorin's neck, trying to pull him closer while Thorin tried to calm him down.

"Daddy…" cried Theo.

"Hey, it's okay, I'm here," assured him Thorin as he pulled him closer.

"Could you please do this somewhere else?"

Bilbo finally noticed that they weren't alone in the room and that Theo's crying probably woke one of Thorin's roommates. Well, now they were two.

"I'm so sorry-"

"I don't care. Just stop talking," came from the other bed.

"Come with me," said Thorin as he got up from the bed and lead Bilbo out of the bedroom and closed the doors behind them. Bilbo collapsed into one of the kitchen chairs and buried his head in his hands while Thorin walked around the kitchen until Theo calmed down. And then everything was quiet.

Thorin ran his hand through Theo's curls when suddenly the bathroom door opened and one of his roommates walked out. Bilbo's head snapped up when the stranger focused on Theo.

"Hey, little man. What are you doing here at this hour?" Theo just looked at him from where he was resting on Thorin's shoulder, sucking on his thumb. "Come on, it can't be that bad. I miss your smile." He pinched Theo's cheek, and the two-year-old offered him a sleepy smile. "I knew you could do it."

"Sorry mate, for waking you up," apologized Thorin.

"I needed to use the toilet anyway. But I would appreciate it if next time you'd introduced yourself before pushing me away," he said to Bilbo.

"I'm sorry," Bilbo whispered back.

"It's already behind us. Goodnight." And with that he disappeared into the other bedroom.

"Are you feeling better now?" Thorin asked Theo as he tried to pull his thumb out of his mouth. The two-year-old nodded before the thumb went back to his mouth.

"He's exhausted. How long has he been crying?" Bilbo looked everywhere else except at Thorin. "Bilbo, how long has he been crying?"

"Not long."

"He's visibly upset, so excuse me if I don't believe you," told him Thorin.

"Fine! He's been upset since last night when he wanted to see you."

"And why didn't he?"

"Hello? We don't live together anymore-"

"That's just an excuse," interrupted Thorin. "You know that if you called I would come."

"I didn't need you!"

"Clearly you did," snapped Thorin back. "I cannot believe you allowed Theo to get hurt so that you wouldn't have to call me."

"It's not my fault he had a nightmare."

"Which probably wouldn't happen if you'd swallow your pride and called me."

"He's fine now," pointed out Bilbo and stood up. "Come on Theo, let's go back."

"No!" Theo only pressed closer to Thorin.

"Daddy is fine. He's okay. You saw him and now we need to go back. You need to sleep and I need to get some sleep as well." He reached for his son, but Theo immediately wrapped his arms around Thorin's neck.

"Daddy," Theo pleaded as he looked up at Thorin, halting Bilbo.

"I think it would be better if he stays here for the rest of the night," Thorin quickly said.

"What?!"

"He wants to stay with me. I see no problem with that."

"And where is he going to sleep? No, forget I even asked that, he's not staying here with you."

"He's going to sleep with me, so you don't have to worry about anything. I'll bring him back to you as always in the afternoon."

"It's not happening. Theo, it's time to go," repeated Bilbo.

"No! Daddy!"

Thorin turned away from Bilbo and put Theo down. "Go to bed, I'll be there in a minute," he told him before he pressed a kiss to his head.

"No, Theo come back!" called Bilbo when Theo ran to Thorin's bedroom. He wanted to go after him, but Thorin blocked his way.

"I think it would be best if you leave."

"He's my son," hissed Bilbo.

"And he's also my son, and he's upset and he clearly wants to stay with me. Nothing will happen to him."

:::

Bilbo sighed when Thorin closed the doors behind him. He was asked to leave. How did that happen? Before Theo would cry his eyes out when he had to stay with Thorin, now he preferred it.

Bilbo couldn't help but to feel bad when he went back to his room. What did he do wrong that Theo didn't want him anymore, that he wasn't enough. He suddenly missed that Theo wasn't a baby anymore, that he didn't need him all the time. That he had Thorin and that Thorin was more than capable of taking care of him.

He thought he was alone when he and Thorin broke up. But he wasn't, he had Theo. And now he had no one. He climbed under the covers and waited for sleep to come.

It never came, and Bilbo spent the rest of the night tossing around on his bed, alone.

Author's notes:

All mistakes are mine.

Sorry this took so long.

I wanted to start a fight between them, but then the chapter would be too long so I decided to leave it for the next one.

Next chapter: "Being amicable isn't in our blood. I've realized we're not friends. Friends have to like each other. And after what happened today, I could never like you."