Red and Black – Chapter 13
In which the fluff starts to become more than fluff…
"Because I love you."
Gordon no, his brain went into overdrive; why the fuck did you say that? I mean, yeah you meant it of course you love him he's basically perfect but why in the shit did you say it OUT LOUD!? Are you fucking high? Oh god he's gunna hate me and I'm gunna die I'm so screwed to hell.
Tim didn't really know what to do; his heart was jumping between the top of his throat and the pit of his stomach. His expression was that of a startled moose, with no way to react; it wasn't so much that this confession was so soon, more that it was so unexpected for the time. Instead of having himself stall any longer, he let his conscience drive.
"I love you too."
In the middle of the crowded street, Gordon froze; and his breathing stopped. Finally, he threw away all regards for what he felt might be wrong, what he felt he might be judged or hated for; restraints vanished. He was overwhelmed with the burning desire to kiss Tim, in the middle of the street, which he did so gladly. He no longer cared, he smoothly slid his hands into the back pockets of his jeans; gently biting his lip, hungry for more trying not to get carried away. Tim was stunned, but never once tried to push him away for he was not embarrassed or ashamed. Tim caressed his cheek with one hand and with the other ran his hand through Gordon's hair, tangling his fingers in the locks. Gordon let Tim's tongue enter his mouth, to explore him freely; Tim cautiously ran along the edge of his mouth, and it took every ounce of Gordon's self-discipline not to let out a moan right there and then in the heart of London.
TBTBTBTBTBTBTBTB
With their hands intertwined, they strolled back to Tim's house; chatting about their plans for the next day.
"So you've never actually seen the great British countryside?" Tim started,
"Only a bit when I've stayed with a friend a couple of times." The friend he was referring to was of course, Penelope.
"Really, what county? Each one is different after all."
"Berkshire, it's Creighton-Ward mansion, I mean." Gordon had no idea if he was actually talking about the county, British geography was far more different from his own.
"You're friends with Lady Penelope? No way! How do you know her?" Wow, Gordon thought; she knew who I was talking about, I had no idea she actually knew him in person.
"She's a family friend I guess, she works with my dad sometimes and she knows us all pretty well. What about you?" He explained, trying to give as little detail on the true circumstance as possible.
"Her father and my father went to school together. We've worked together on some stuff too but we've essentially known her for ages. Actually, that gives me an idea;" they had reached the front of Tim's house. It was a tall, thin, white Georgian townhouse; not too far from Belgravia, certainly it ran in the family, and while in modern times it did not look to be much of a luxury it made a perfect home.
"Tomorrow, we drive to Somerset; take five minutes to see the crappy little place where I went to school, see the Camelot sites and run off and visit Penny. How about that, babe?" He said as they walked up the cold stone steps together.
"Sounds like a plan, darling." They fell back into the same passionate kiss as before, they stumbled through the front door; making-out and walking to the staircase simultaneously. They reached the foot of the stairs, Tim strongly grasped Gordon's waist; bringing his lover closer, but Gordon stopped for a second and smirked before running up the staircase sounding a cheeky laugh. Tim rapidly followed suite, and Gordon had barely waited for him in the hallway upstairs. Tim gently pushed Gordon against the wall, he carefully held his chin and smiled naughtily looking into his eyes. Their breathing heightened together, their pupils dilated; Gordon slid one hand up Tim's back and lightly clutched his neck, the other on his waist. Tim bit Gordon's lip carefully, but powerfully; taking one hand away he began to tug at Gordon's shirt. But Gordon leaned back slightly, and took his hand away from Tim's waist and held it against his wrist.
"No," he said calmly,
"I'm not ready, not yet." Gordon felt horribly ashamed, he knew that he shouldn't feel guilty for not wanting something; but he did. It felt awful to have let it go on, and not only for him; Tim felt just as bad, he'd tried to run before they could walk. He couldn't help but think that he had pressured Gordon too much already.
"I'm sorry," he whispered, hanging his head against Tim's shoulder.
"Really, I just…" He tried to choke back bitter tears, ones that Gordon feared would fall in the wake of his disgrace. But he felt a comforting palm against his face,
"It's okay." Tim murmured, he pulled Gordon into a tight embrace; hoping it would bring Gordon's erratic breathing back to normal. Placing a light kiss on Gordon's forehead he looked down to say quietly;
"Do you want to stay in your room or just cuddle?" Gordon looked up smiled again,
"I want to stay with you."
TBTBTBTBTBTBTBTB
Later, when they had both changed into their pyjamas they silently lay side by side under the covers. Tim lay behind Gordon, his arms around his side with their hands still tightly grasped. As they drifted off together Gordon felt a single drop of water roll down his face; a single tear of joy. And with that, Gordon knew that he was truly safe and happy.
This is something way more people need to learn; if someone says no, they fucking mean no.
Hopefully I will update tomorrow but with the amount of work I have who knows, so if the worst comes to the worst in that department I might not even be able to update until May because my stupid boarding school blocks this website. (Rude, I know.)
Don't worry though, I'm sure they get there eventually when they're BOTH ready.
Don't forget to R&R for more on this story, favourite and follow this if you enjoy it. If you're like me and you're going back to school next week, yeah it's gunna be hell BUT WE WILL LIVE!
Later potaters…