I carried the mask in a bag against my chest and walked two steps behind Renji for the entire trip. Even on the train, I stood directly behind Renji, my face hidden in the shadows of a hoodie, and suddenly I understood why Clive had found comfort in the garment. I acknowledged that I was unusual looking, with bleached hair, assorted facial piercings, and unique fashion-sense, but that day, with my face hidden inside the hood and my eyes covered by the wraparound glasses, I felt a little less obvious while surrounded by humans.
We got off and walked the two blocks into a very, very bad neighborhood in the Eleventh Ward. According to the paperwork, Clive lived in apartment four hundred and twelve of a crappy, run down building that looked like it had been condemned and abandoned for years.
"Are you sure this is the right place? No one around here could afford one of your masks."
"I'm trading the mask for the tattoos he did for me," I replied. "He's really good. Look what he did to fix the mess on my wrist." I presented my left arm for inspection.
"Where'd you meet this guy?"
"He walked in off the street. He was savaged by someone and wants to hide his scars -"
"Wait! This guy isn't…" Renji looked around, making sure there were no eyes and ears on us, "he's human, isn't he?"
"I guess so, I didn't ask," I said.
"You fool. Where has the shrewd boss of Ward Four gone? You gave that up, what? Three months ago? And your brain's gone soft already? Walk your own damn self home, or get your human friend to do it."
Renji walked off, his shoulders scrunched low and his pace so quick, I would have to yell, or run, to catch him, neither of which I wanted to do right now being in enemy territory, with no backup.
I took the steps two at a time and made it to the fourth floor without seeing anyone, but once I stepped onto the walkway, the three apartments closest to the stairs had their doors open and and music and light spilled out along with a group of teenagers who sauntered between the apartments freely. I couldn't see the numbers on the doors without peering in and I got an eye full of naked bodies having an orgy in the first, a group of boys doing lines of drugs in the second, and in the third, a group was playing video games in front of a television almost too large to have fit in through the door. I checked each number and found they weren't the right ones, but I was still moving in the right direction.
At the end of the walkway, another hallway jutted out toward the back of the apartments, and as I continued along watching the numbers grow, it got quieter and darker until at last I stopped before a door with the right number and a name plate that said 'Watanbe Goro.'
There was no bell, so I hesitated, not wanting to bang on the door and wake Clive up, if he wasn't feeling well, but then I heard a noise from inside and lifted my hand to knock.
"You worthless little shit. You call this clean? I should make you lick it up with your tongue." The voice was loud and clear through the door; it was the same one I'd heard on the phone the other day. I waited, shuffling back and forth. This was a really bad idea. Should I just leave it at the door? I could knock and then run, four stories isn't high enough to keep me from jumping over the side-
"You filthy little cunt, I can't believe this -" The voice cut off suddenly and was followed by the sound of a body slamming into a wall. I knew that sound; I had caused my enemies to make that noise over the years I had held the top spot in the Fourth Ward, and I didn't like the fact that the person on the receiving end might be Clive. What am I hesitating? I hadn't heard a single sound from the other person yet, and I wasn't about to go busting doors down until I was sure.
Crack! The sound made me jump back away from the door, and it was followed quickly by a sharp slap and the quiet sounds of sobbing.
"Please, Goro, I'm sorry, if you don't stop I won't be able to go to work again, and they'll fire me, please -" Clive's voice quieted as the sound of flesh meeting flesh started again.
I put down the bag and took a deep breath; lifting my foot, I kicked the flimsy door in with a single strike.
"What the fuck?" Goro shouted as he turned from where he was hunched over Clive's huddled form and charged toward the door. I stepped in, and pushed it closed behind me. I stopped Goro's punch with an upraised hand, and the raging asshole skittered to a stop a confused look on his face. He shook his hand, disbelieving.
"Who the hell are you?"
"My name is Uta," I replied. "And I'm going to kill you." Goro's face scrunched up, confused at this saying coming from me, a man half his size. He laughed and shook out his hand again.
"Uta don't, just run, get out of here. He's high and he gets crazy when he's like this."
"Is there a back way out of here?" I asked, deflecting punches, and dodging his ungainly swipes as if I was fighting off an angry two-year-old.
"No," Clive gulped, his lip bloody and bruises blooming all over his face.
"Go in the next room, now," I told him. On his hands and knees, Clive crawled in that direction. Goro managed to get one hit beyond my guard, and knocked my sunglasses off.
"You're a -"
"Yes I am."
Most of the time I don't find it necessary to flaunt my power, hell very few people have seen my full Kagune, but I wasn't interested in wasting time and giving the neighbors a chance to call the CCG. I drove my fist through Goro's chest, grabbed his heart, and pulled it out. Boom went the asshole.
I bent to pick up my glasses, and as I straightened I saw Clive, still kneeling, staring at me from the doorway to the other room. I put on the glasses, knowing it was far too late. I went outside, grabbed the bag, and put it gently on the ratty sofa inside the door. By that time, Clive was on his feet in the main room, gazing down at Goro's corpse.
"Go in the back room. Don't come out until I tell you it's clear," I told him and he moved quickly away.
I called the Clowns and they were there within five minutes with a meat wagon. We paraded him out past the crowds, pretending he was drunk and then I went back in to talk to Clive, so I could let him know the score. He was still in the bedroom, sitting on the corner of the bed, when I came back in.
"That's your mask on the couch. Don't ever tell anyone where you got it. Say it was a gift, or something."
"Thank you," Clive said. "I think he would have killed me this time. It was the first time he left bruises above the neck, you see. He lost it… anyway, thank you. I can finish your last tattoos tomorrow night. I'll come by at the same time."
"I won't be there; I'll have to move the shop. Don't look for me; our rules say I must kill you, but I won't. You don't deserve that. Not after all this…"
"I won't say anything, I promise. I'm good at keeping secrets," he said, whining just a little.
"You know my face and you can perfectly describe my tattoos to the CCG – you might not even want to, but if they suspect you know, the Dove's will beat the information out of you. Don't make me kill you, Clive."
"Ok, I'll go to –"
"Don't tell me, I'll be tempted to hunt you down."
"Don't pity me," he smiled. "If you have to kill me, just do it quickly. I can't promise I won't be a screamer any other way."
"Get your things together and leave Tokyo for a while, do it tonight, Clive. I've enjoyed your friendship; I don't want to mourn you."
He packed up his toolbox and a messenger bag with some clothes and the mask; even after he was done, the apartment didn't look any different. And then I followed him to the train station, watched him buy a ticket, and disappear out of sight.
Renji was at the shop, waiting for me when I arrived, along with the two Clowns and the van with the half-rendered body of Goro in the back.
"Uta, what cuts do you want?"
"The same as usual; send the internal organs to Rize as a peace offering. If we're lucky we might sate her appetite before she kills someone today."
"Eyeballs, fingers, and toes, then?"
"And testicles," I answered.
"All the organs to Rize?"
"You can have the brain, she only wants the ones from the torso. You two split the rest with Raven. And clean out the truck quickly. I need to move shop tonight," I said, unlocking the front door and heading straight to the back.
I was pushing all the notions back into my sewing kit, throwing out bits and pieces that were of no further use, when Renji appeared at my elbow.
"Sounds like it wasn't a successful trip. Tell me you killed him Uta; make me believe it."
"Of course I did," I answered, thinking only of Goro. "The boys are splitting him up now."
"So why are we moving you?"
"I've got to assume he mentioned the mask, my shop, or our agreement to somebody. I'd be stupid if I didn't," I snapped.
"That sounds a little bit more like the Uta I know. Good."
"I'm moving back to the Fourth Ward. I know of a perfectplace to set up shop, but can I stay with you tonight? I won't have time to set up my new apartment – the shop has to come first."
"Of course you can, but first give me that apartment number." He held out his hand. I took the paper from my pocket and handed it to him, then watched as he sped out into the night.
When I got out to the truck with the first arm load of supplies, there was a courier waiting for me with a package. I signed for it without thinking and threw it on the front seat while the two Clowns loaded up the largest pieces of equipment. It was like playing a game of Tetris to get it all to fit, but eventually the important parts were all moved over to this shop and the others left with their spoils for the night.
Once Renji was satisfied that my customer was dead, he called me, and arranged to pick me up. The last thing I did for the night was grab the package, because I'd been waiting for a delivery of new bias tape and I was kinda excited about what I could do with it. So, we were sitting in the train on the way to the Twentieth Ward, when I finally opened it.
On top was a stack of yen, about fifteen thousand in all, and under it was a note. It said something like: This is the most I could get together in one night. I hope it will make some dent in the debt I owe you. Also, please enjoy a meal on me, you deserve more than this, but it is what I could afford.
Under the rest, wrapped in wax paper and surrounded by cold packs was a piece of flesh, weighing about a hundred and seventy grams or so. Immediately upon smelling it, I knew it had come from his own body.
Renji handed me a handkerchief, "You're bringing attention to us; pull yourself together."
I dabbed the tears away from my eyes and read the note again.
"Secret admirer?" he asked.
"Something like that."
"It smells good. Are you going to share?"
"No," I said, my voice very tight and strained.
"I understand, it's not every day that someone declares their love for you that way."
"I'm confused," Kaneki-kun admits, sipping from his cold coffee. He's hardly moved the entire time Clive and I tell him the story, not even to drink his coffee.
"About what?" Clive asks.
"How did Yomo know that the sender of the package was in love with Uta?"
"Ah, that's right, I forget you didn't grow up a Ghoul," I laugh. "To share ones own flesh is considered devotion among our kind, but Renji assumed it came from a ghoul."
"I didn't know that at all, of course. I was just an ignorant human, but Uta saved me, not just from Goro, or from the other Ghouls, but from killing myself. That was going to be my next step," Clive tells him.
"Goro gave you those scars?"
"He did. He got drunk and sliced my face open, and when it wouldn't stop bleeding, he drove me to the hospital, and physically pushed me out of the passenger-side door at the curb. He'd abused me for over a year, and that came after my father had kicked me out of the house because I was gay… I'd figured there was no place left for me in this world, but Uta had showed me that someone still cared."
I reach out and trace the contours of Clives face, feeling the scars that had brought us together. I worship those scars at night, when we make love, and even though Kaneki-kun is watching, I need to feel him under my fingertips right then.
"But how did you find each other again?" he asks, coughing just a little.
"Oh, well, as to that… Clive will have to tell that story, I'm still a little fuzzy on some of it. Those three years were spent helping the Clowns enforce peace in a Ward I'd given up, only to slink back to, my tail between my legs when I'd made a decision I thought I'd regret for the rest of my life."
"Once I left Tokyo I went to Okinawa, because that's where my mother was. She was still married to my dad, so I waited until he left for work and then I knocked on the door. She cried when she saw me, gave me all the money she could, but I ended up back on the streets."
"I took the entrance exams for Okinawa Prefectural University of Arts, and majored in Design and Painting so I could live in the dorms. It was a rough three years, but I found a shop to work in, and eventually bought my own gun again -"
"What happened to the one you took with you?" Kaneki-kun asks, and I sigh, knowing the answer.
"I sold it that night, before I leaving Tokyo. That was the money I sent to Uta."
"So you had no livelihood at all?"
"None, I did some designs for quick cash, and did my best with what my mom could give me, but it wasn't until after I finally made it into the university that I found work. Being homeless sucks everywhere, but it sucks less in Okinawa than in Tokyo, that's for sure."
"Ok, so you stayed alive, but that doesn't answer how you got back together…"