Unpleasant Surprises

The tips of Tsunade's polished nails drummed incessantly on the mahogany top of her desk. Drum, drum, drum. Naruto fidgeted in his seat, cursing all its discomfort. He thought his ass would eventually go numb if he had to sit here any longer. His blue eyes wandered and met the Fifth's burning gaze once again. He had been sitting in her office for just short of an hour. The first half hour of it, she'd been called away for a "short" meeting and she'd ordered him to stay put.

So he had, counting down the minutes until he paced around the room and peered at her books out of boredom. At one point he'd grown bold and drawn mustaches on some of the portraits in her copy of History of the Leaf: The Years and Accomplishments of the First Four Hokages.

Tsunade was keeping tight-lipped about why she thought Naruto had any more to say about Sasuke that he hadn't already told her. Grimacing, he began to fear that maybe she'd heard something troubling.

"Naruto." Tsunade began again, "Do you know what it means to be Hokage?"

Naruto snorted at the question, a little surprised and perturbed. What could this be leading to? "What am I? Five?"

"Responsibility, Naruto," Tsunade rumbled. "Loyalty and the protection of our village, our people, those beloved to us. Sometimes we must come to terms with the inevitable. Some people cannot be saved, and in that moment, you must remember what you are fighting for as ninja of the Hidden Leaf."

Naruto straightened, blue eyes blazing with anger. "You want to talk about Sasuke? Again? I told you everything about the fight already! What more can I possibly tell you?" he asked resentfully. Tsunade fixed her golden eyes upon him, and he beheld no mercy in her fierce gaze. He felt his heart sink.

"Yes, and now I need to make certain you won't pull another stunt like that ever again! You aren't here so I can ask you questions. You're here so I can make this clear for you."

He winced and resisted the urge to get up and leave the room in frustration. He clenched his fists. "I told you. We were fighting, and then he was gone." In a sense, it was true, anyway. By now the unfinished story slipped from his lips so easily and so persistently it was hard to not feel guilty. It was as if it was all that had happened. Tsunade frowned, pursing her lips. She folded her hands and rested her chin upon the knot of fingers, studying him.

After a tense silence, she spoke. "What if I said I don't believe you?"

The words Naruto had rehearsed again and again died in his throat. He stared at her, wide-eyed and disbelieving. Get up. He told himself. Glare at her and tell her how disappointed you are with her, how you can't believe she of all people would turn her back on you! But he couldn't say it. The way she stared at him made him feel uneasy, as if she knew and this was her plan of attack in order to get him to spill his guts.

"What if I said," She continued, "That I felt your connection to Sasuke is too deep?"

Naruto frowned at the choice of words. "You've already told me I'm too emotionally involved, that type of thinking is to be expected. I won't deny it," he answered carefully, his gaze never wavering.

"Naruto, I've had you trailed."

"I know," he growled, not impressed.

"What were you doing at the memorial?"

Naruto stilled. Were they already dissecting every little tear, every outburst? His mouth worked, but he didn't spit out the angry words climbing up his throat. Tsunade was the Hokage, and there was a line Naruto could cross.

"Naruto, the depth of any sort of past relationship you've had is none of my business,, but I need to make myself clear. This is not a time to reflect on the past. This is not a time when people who turn away from us can be saved.

Sometimes, you have to accept fate. Acting rashly can affect our entire village, and the peace amongst the villages in Shinobi Alliance is thin. You are an important figure Naruto. You're a hero. Someone the people look up to. Your actions reflect heavily upon this village. Upon me. I need to know I can put you back out on the field and trust you to make a ninja's decision should the moment arise. That's all." This time Tsunade's voice was quiet, her eyes soft.

Naruto looked away. He felt his cheeks flame, and suddenly it was too warm in Tsunade's office. The shame, the guilt, the anger, the pain, all of it threatened to swell and bubble to the surface. He wouldn't let it. He'd been so angry lately. Angry at the villagers, angry at himself, angry at Sasuke. Mostly angry with Sasuke. He swallowed the painful lump that had formed in his throat.

He looked at her fiercely."I know. I understand." He hated that he felt as though he'd been figured out.

"I can't put you on a mission until I've evaluated you myself." She said, and for once her voice sounded almost maternal. Naruto looked away from her.

"Naruto, I know you understand my reasons for keeping you here in the village. There is danger out there, mortal danger, the risk of murder and betrayal, and you are letting yourself be overcome. It's crippling," she said bluntly. Naruto puffed up, indignant, but he held his tongue again. He nodded curtly.

Point taken, Lady Hokage.

"You know, kid, I've never met anyone like you. You're the type of person someone sees once and never forgets. It's that insufferable spirit of yours that's so infectious…" She grinned at her choice of words, though it was a bittersweet smile. "Sometimes even I truly believe nothing is out of your reach. That's how I much I believe in you. Would I consider you as my successor if I thought otherwise?" she shot at him. That surprised him, and he looked up disbelievingly. He smiled a little, but remained silent.

Tsunade sighed and continued. "Naruto, you aren't a miracle worker. It ends here. I already sent off my team."

Naruto's stomach clenched."You never learn, Granny. They'll fail. I'm the only one who can touch him. They'll only get hurt. Or worse," he said grimly.

The comment made her flush with irritation. "You might be the only one who can touch him, but even your touch didn't have a lasting effect," she said mildly. Naruto turned red at the implication and wished he could leave.

"If he didn't stick around after, he'll never come back to you." The instant she said it, she regretted it. Her words were a slap in the face. They were personal. She was crossing a line between Hokage and personal friend. The look of pain in those cornflower blue eyes made her feel like a true villain. No, it must be done. It's gone on too long and it is ruining him. He must abandon his memories and end this foolishness. I cannot afford him risking the result of this war on whatever skeleton he and Sasuke have hidden in the closet. He's too important.

"The Sasuke you knew is gone."

Naruto looked up at her, his face strangely impassive. The look of hurt had disappeared from his eyes, and they glittered brilliantly. "So is the compassion I once thought my friends had." His words hit home, and Tsunade's words died in her throat.

She stared at him. "I'm guessing you won't cooperate with my evaluation."

"I'll cooperate, and I'm ready to fight. So there it is." He rose, bowed his head towards her out of respect, and turned to leave.

Tsunade stopped him, hating herself a little. She hadn't fully explained herself and the reason for putting him back on the field. "I wrote the Kages. We have all agreed that it is in everyone's best interest to hide you until Sasuke is taken care of. I wanted you to fight alongside our comrades, but I cannot afford a misstep. Not this time. I wanted to be sure you were ready for this mission, for this trip. It will be under the guise of an S-class mission." Naruto paused long enough for her to continue.

"You will be traveling with the Cloud to a remote location. Not even I can reveal the exact coordinates to you. You will need to say your goodbyes. You leave in a matter of days. We can't be certain you'll meet Sasuke along the way, but you're certain to come across scattered Akatsuki troops. You're also meant to gather any intel you can on the way."

His shoulders sagged, and Naruto wondered how it had all gone so wrong. "You don't trust me."

"I don't trust Sasuke," Tsunade corrected him.

Naruto snorted. "Fine, but take the ANBU guards off my roof."

"I will dismiss the team, but I will leave one guard to stand watch over you nightly," Tsunade conceded. Naruto shook his head, but he had no choice but to agree to her terms. Muttering darkly, he left Tsunade in her office. She sank in her chair, pulling a bottle of sake out from one of her drawers and took a healthy swallow.

It needed to be done.

Seething, Naruto trudged from the Hokage's quarters. He ignored the stares, even the polite inquiries to his health and well-being. At the moment, he felt betrayed by them all.

It was simply no fair. One mistake and everyone looked at him with apprehension and dawning fear.

Were they right in placing their trust in the Kyuubi Jinchuuriki that was so desperately desired by their enemy? Especially if that enemy was so desperately desired by their hero? What if he was an idiot and tried to the impossible, risking their lives and sacrificing them in the end for his own selfish desires?

Naruto hated mulling over the gossip, but he knew it was what was being said. Naturally, people were afraid. Fear bred conflict, and conflict bred anger and distrust. It was only natural they would turn and criticize a powerful figure. Who else could they blame?

Was that it then? Their fear was only natural? he thought scornfully. Yes, only natural, and it all stemmed from the hellish demon locked away inside him. The burden Naruto carried for them, even if his fate wasn't of his choosing. He wasn't sure whether he was disgusted or depressed. He had lived with these thoughts for so long, and had thought himself triumphant over their dark meanings, but now he wasn't so sure. For the first time in a while, he felt truly alone.

The lined grin of old man Teuchi was a welcome sight as Naruto wandered downtown. He slid into a stool at Ichariku Ramen's booth, feeling a little better and more at ease at the smell of food.

Teuchi dropped a large bowl of miso ramen in front of an eager Naruto and chuckled heartily. "Some things never change!" he laughed.

Naruto tucked in and grinned through a mouthful. "Nothing lifts the spirit like a bowl of ramen, old man!" he said, licking his lips as he noisily slurped up some noodles. Teuchi shook his head in mock sadness.

"It's a wonder you haven't put my new restaurant out of business yet. You eat so much ramen it costs a fortune to replace!" he complained, stirring a pot. The old man looked at Naruto seriously.

"You say nothing lifts the spirits better than a good bowl of ramen. Is something troubling you?" Teuchi was only being grandfatherly Naruto knew, but he was uncomfortable with the question. So he grinned brightly and complained of his duties.

"You can complain when you have actual missions to go on!" a voice called out. Naruto turned and flipped off Kiba, who laughed. He had been passing by, accompanied by Shino. Shino nodded and Kiba enthusiastically invited Naruto to join them for a drink. He must really be stressed. The blond shook his head the moment Teuchi slapped Kiba over the head with a whip of his towel.

"Bunch of brats, don't talk about liquor in front of me when you're not even old enough to hold it!" He warned.

Kiba groaned and went on a tirade. "Come on, old man, times are hard and this war sucks. If we're old enough to die out there, we're old enough for a little drink, doncha think? Soon, we might not even get to see each other and we'll be on the battle field. Give a couple hard working ninja a break why don't ya?"

Teuchi shook his head and hurried back to his ramen. Naruto paid and thanked him before joining the other two.

"Be smart, Naruto!" Teuchi called after him, and Naruto waved, assuring him he would hooked an arm around Naruto's neck and filled him in.

"My cousin's working the shift at the Red Fox, she's gonna let us in!" Kiba told him. When the blond didn't say anything immediately Kiba sighed.

"Loosen up!" he scolded.

Naruto laughed. "Ha, if I loosen up any more than you, my shit will fall right out of my ass," he taunted.

Kiba bristled and tackled him, though they both laughed while Akamaru barked and growled. Shino watched them curiously through dark goggles and hesitated when they reached the Red Fox.

"Alcohol clouds the mind," he said, uncertain. Shino never usually participated in Kiba's drinking escapades, much to the other's chagrin. Inuzuka must have felt particularly triumphant to have convinced his teammate enough to join him.

Kiba snorted. "So do women, but we do them anyway, right?" he retorted, flashing a toothy grin. Shino flushed crimson, brows furrowed. Apparently he didn't share similar experiences.

Naruto quickly cut in, sparing Shino the awkward moment. "Ha! Like you really get around!" Naruto jested, pointing at Kiba and laughing loudly. Kiba flushed and narrowed his eyes, not too pleased. He looked embarrassed.

"At least the girls I sleep with remember me!" he shot back before thinking, and then he seemed to realize what he had said. Naruto stopped laughing and stared at Kiba strangely for a second. Then he smiled, deciding that any sort of conflict just wasn't worth it.

"Aw, shit, hey man, I didn't mean-" Kiba began to awkwardly apologize, but Naruto cut him off.

"Please. I'm so good, the girls black out from pleasure and have a hard time remembering if it was me they slept with, or some god," he said, grinning broadly, a twinkle in his blue eyes. Kiba guffawed, shaking his head.

"Whatever, let's go in." Kiba slapped Shino on the shoulder and led him inside, Naruto followed behind, hands stuffed in his pockets, suddenly quiet. He wondered if even Shino knew about him and Sakura. He wouldn't be surprised. He inwardly groaned. How embarrassing.

Kiba's cousin had a pretty heart shaped face that any young man might have looked at twice, if it hadn't been for the giant dog at her heels growling at anyone who bothered to look. She smacked Kiba over the head for showing up, and her trusty canine eyed them all warily. She continued to complain about how she was going to lose her job, but she let them in anyway.

The bar was deserted save for a few old men sipping their whiskey and one tattered looking man snoring away in a corner, his hand curled around a bottle of sake.

Kiba handed Shino a beer, egging him on. Naruto joined in, joking and pestering until Shino finally took a gulp. Oh the joys of peer pressure.

For a little while, Naruto tried to enjoy himself, although his system broke the alcohol down so fast he'd have to chug like a madman to feel a buzz for a few minutes. Oh how he wished the damned fox would let him enjoy a good buzz for once. It'd be nice to forget. To just laugh and shrug everything off, never mind the consequences.

Naruto gripped his glass and threw the alcohol down his throat, slamming the glass down and asking for more, much to the amusement of his companions.

After an hour, Kiba and Shino were flushed, sluggish, and slurring their words. Naruto had a headache. He listened idly to their drunken stammers.

"You know," Kiba began, after a moment of silence, "I'm kind of scared." Naruto looked up at him. Kiba burped and swirled the sake around in his glass, seeming forlorn. Shino said nothing, only seemed to stare straight ahead, the ruddy light from the bar reflecting off his black goggles.

"What if we never get to see each other like this again?" Kiba asked in a slightly wavering voice.

Naruto groaned. "Shit, I should have known better than to come out with you! You're such a sad drunk!"

Kiba growled at that. "I'm serious, man! Soon all hell's gonna break loose again. We've all been so close to dying, yet here we are, still alive and laughing. How long's that gonna last? And what about you?" He gestured towards Naruto, who squirmed in his seat and winced against his headache.

"They're after you," Kiba said. "Madara and Sasuke, and you just charge Sasuke head on with no regard for your own life. What's wrong with you?" he blurted, suddenly angry. Naruto slouched in his chair and rubbed his temples.

"Sasuke is a touchy subject for him, leave him be." Shino advised.

Kiba growled again. "Let him go, man. He's shown us where his loyalties lay, and it's not with us. The world's better off with the bastard dead. I hope Shikamaru's team brings him down. Why the fuck are you so persistent? I'm sick of being nice about it. You go after him like you can't bear to let him go, like he's everything or something! I mean, what, are you fucking homo for him or something?" He barked out a harsh laugh.

Naruto stiffened. Before he could think about what he was doing, he abruptly stood, slamming his glass hard on the table. It shattered. Kiba's cousin, Keiko, shrieked.

"The fuck did you call me?" Naruto snarled. Kiba swayed on his feet slightly when he stood, cheeks a rosy pink.

"Fuck, you make me so mad sometimes! I'm just trying to be your friend. I don't want you to die, but then there you are, ready to die for this bastard who hates your guts and would kill you in a heartbeat. Why do you love him like you do? What about your real friends?"

Naruto's headache throbbed worse than ever and he growled, closing his eyes for a second, but Keiko's voice was hissing through his thoughts. "Kiba! You dumbass! Take your little friends and get out before I get in trouble! Get out, now, before I have to call security!" she hissed, throwing a towel at them.

"I was already going," Naruto grumbled. Kiba stumbled after him pausing the thank his cousin for the drinks. Naruto winced against the sunlight as he strode outside, kicking up dust.

"Just listen to me, man-" Kiba grabbed Naruto's elbow, but he shrugged Kiba off a little roughly.

"Go sleep the sake off," Naruto said, thoroughly annoyed. Maybe going for a drink had been a bad idea after all.

"Go sleep Sasuke off!" Kiba retorted lamely, grabbing at Naruto once more and trying to turn him around face to face. Infuriated at this point, Naruto turned and pushed Kiba off of him, hoping his friend would take the hint and stumble on home. Kiba staggered, and suddenly he was throwing a punch. Naruto blocked it and pushed Kiba away once more.

"You're being an idiot, Kiba," Naruto hissed at him. Kiba shook his head sadly.

"So that's how it is?" he laughed bitterly. People had begun to stare. Naruto eyed them nervously, feeling embarrassed.

"Come on, I'll walk you home." Naruto mumbled, reaching for Kiba's shoulder. Whether it was the alcohol, or simply pent up anger, Kiba lashed out Naruto, tackling him to the ground. Shino watched apprehensively, leaning against a wall, cheeks still pink. Not wanting to hurt his friend too badly, Naruto flipped Kiba off him. Kiba landed hard on his back, groaning. Akamaru was circling them, snarling.

"Are you going to calm down now?" Naruto offered a hand, but Kiba grabbed his ankle and dragged Naruto down, fangs bared. Despite the alcohol's influence, his reflexes were still lightning quick. They grappled, spitting curses.

One of the flying punches hit Naruto in the temple and he gritted his teeth.

"Fucking hell, Kiba!" He pushed Kiba off him, gingerly touching a gash by his eye. Kiba's nails had elongated into claws, and he'd raked a claw across Naruto's face. By now, Kiba was silently crying, giving up on the fight. Shocked, Naruto stared at him.

"The fuck is wrong with you?" Kiba said, sniffling, his fat bottom lip still oozing fresh blood. "Why do you gotta be like this? Is Sasuke really that important? What about the rest of us?"

Naruto stood, holding a hand to his eye. "Everything's wrong with me, apparently," he muttered, hefting Kiba up from under his armpits. "Come on, time to go home."

A small crowd had gathered by now, and ninja were arriving, but the fight was over, and they only ushered bystanders away. Kakashi appeared, giving Naruto a long look with a smoky gray eye.

"That gash is kind of deep," he observed, once he noticed Naruto. Naruto shrugged.

"'S not so bad."

"Yeah, Naru," Kiba was slurring, "It's a pretty fucking badass slash!" Naruto rolled his eyes at his friend's drunken antics and pulled him along.

"Let me take Kiba home so you can go to the clinic to get it stitched up," Kakashi offered.

"Like it won't heal on its own in a couple of hours?" Naruto pointed out, unsure as to why Kakashi insisted. Sighing, Naruto eventually gave in, his head still throbbing. Kakashi walked off with Kiba, and Naruto headed to the clinic, holding his sleeve up to his eye to staunch the blood. He didn't head there right away, and took a detour for a while to clear his head.

By the time he reached the clinic, Kakashi had already found his way back to the hospital's entrance, obviously curious, or waiting for Naruto. Or both. They headed towards the double doors together in silence. Naruto wondered if Kakashi had anything important to say, or anything to rip his butt about. Everyone else seemed to have an opinion. Still, Kakashi said nothing, only hummed tunelessly.

"You know," Kakashi said finally as they walked through the sterile smelling halls, "Once I thought I loved someone. She was from a different village, a village that didn't take too kindly to ours. I thought it wouldn't matter, but I was young and stupid. Do you know what happened?"

Naruto didn't answer, so Kakashi went on. "She betrayed me. She used me to try and enter the village to gather intel." He paused to add, "And then she stole my cat."

Naruto blinked at him."That sucks," he said.

Kakashi shrugged. "A lot of things suck. But you know, she taught me something about bonds. A true bond cannot be broken, and real love is never forgotten, even for a ninja."

Naruto groaned, missing some of the meaning. "Just say it. Tell me I'm an idiot. That I allowed my emotions to get the better of me. Tell me that he never cared about me, and that he never will. Tell me I'll never be able to save him. Tell me that my feelings border on the unnatural. Just get it over with, I don't care anymore." He seemed to choke on his own voice and quieted.

Kakashi sighed. "I won't, because I don't want to bring you down. I'm just telling you what I learned. I'm just saying, if it's real, it's never truly forgotten. Think about it," he said after a moment. Naruto said nothing in response.

Kakashi suddenly perked up. "Oh, look, we're here. Sakura's on duty, she'll fix you right up! Isn't that great?" Kakashi said cheerfully, quickly changing the subject. Naruto glared at him.

"Sakura?! What-You knew she'd be the one fixing me up, didn't you?" Naruto cried.

Kakashi walked away, smiling, pulling Icha Icha Paradise out of his pocket. "It wounds me to see two of my students fighting so bitterly. Time to make up!" He grinned and disappeared down the adjacent hall.

"Meddling bastard!" Naruto fumed, but he kept walking anyway. Sakura, as Naruto expected, seemed flustered to see him. She quickly worked on the gash and asked if any other damage had been done. Instead of waiting for an answer, Sakura plowed on, hands glowing green, as she checked Naruto over.

"Really, Sakura, that's unnecessary," he mumbled, fidgeting.

Sakura blushed. "That gash looked bad, I'm just making sure everything else looks okay," she said quickly.

Naruto rolled his eyes. "There's no need to check my whole body over, it was only a gash!" he complained, but then his face lit up with a foxy grin. "Unless you're looking for a medical excuse to check me out!" He laughed, and the vein in Sakura's forehead pulsed. He quickly quieted when she hit him over the head. He whimpered.

"Naruto!" she warned dangerously.

"Sakuraaa!" Naruto whined, holding his head. "It's not my fault you need medical excuses to cop a feel!"

She refrained from hitting him again, and sighed. "You're supposed to get a routine check-up anyway before you leave. Tsunade's orders. Just to make sure everything looks good and the Kyuubi's chakra isn't leaking out-"

Naruto cut her off. "I have the key to the seal, I would know if chakra was leaking out and I needed to tighten it-"

"Neji said you had a chakra imbalance!" Sakura blurted.

Naruto paused, then cursed. "Goddamn Neji! Look, Sakura, there's nothing wrong, really."

Sakura shrugged. "Yeah, well, Tsunade is flustered about it. She wanted to check you out herself, but since you're here, I'm just going to look you over." She hesitated, her hands fluttering over his midsection. Her brows furrowed.

"Maybe he was right," she said quietly. Naruto cocked an eyebrow, suddenly nervous.

"I can feel a concentrated energy," she explained, looking anxious. A sudden fear seized Naruto, but he shoved it down. I have the key. I have the ability to tighten the seal. There's no way the Kyuubi can be leaking out on me. But now there was evidence supporting the theory. Sakura's hand was hovering over his stomach, where his seal was. He suppressed a shiver. No, no, no. Please don't let that be happening, he quietly despaired. Sakura seemed genuinely frightened and concerned.

She looked up at him. "Wouldn't you have some sort of warning if he was leaking out?"

"Of course! I don't understand what this is, but I would sure as hell know if that bastard was leaking out!" Naruto snapped, too nervous to dull his words.

Sakura shook her head. "That's it, you're seeing Tsunade. I don't know what this means." She opened the door leading out of the examining room, waiting for him to follow. Swallowing his fear, Naruto followed her.

Tsunade looked to Shizune, heart racing. Naruto was waiting for her verdict on the situation, and she could hardly contain her own fear. Could it be? The Fourth's seal weakening that much? A tailed beast had not been unleashed in almost seventeen years. The thought of it made her hands tremble as she reached out towards the area where Sakura had recorded the feeling of concentrated energy.

Naruto lay so still upon the examining table, it was almost unnatural. The glitter in his eyes had faded to a dull sheen, and she knew it was because he was terrified of bad news. Sakura hovered in the background, watching Naruto intensely, green eyes gleaming.

Slowly, Tsuande reached out. She almost gasped at the feeling of the concentrated chakra that swirled within Naruto. It was…odd. Normally, she saw chakra displacements in pregnant women, especially in nin, due to the body's natural defenses in order to better protect the developing fetus. Otherwise, chakra displacement could be seen when a ninja was mortally wounded, or even terminally ill or battling serious infection. The body worked furiously to recover, sending energy to the affected area of the body. Even then, it wasn't this noticeable.

It was disconcerting to see chakra displacement of this level in a male who was otherwise healthy. It made no sense. However, as a seasoned medic nin, Tsunade was aware there were always exceptions.

Frowning, she used her healing chakra to reach out farther, trying to identify the nature of the chakra. Sure enough, she was met with the heat of the Kyuubi's chakra, which wasn't a good sign. However, a large portion of it was also Naruto's natural chakra. The two chakras seemed to be in a good balance, which troubled her.

"You can breathe now, Naruto. I highly doubt your chakra displacement is due to the Fourth's seal weakening beyond repair." She heard Naruto let out a breath he'd been holding.

"So what's up then?" he wondered. Tsunade pursed her lips.

"Could be infection. Maybe a bad ulcer," She decided, still searching her mind for an answer.

Naruto frowned. "I don't feel sick-"

"Chakra displacements are normally only seen in men when they're sick or mortally wounded. I'm ordering an ultrasound to take a look inside your abdominal cavity, just to ensure there isn't anything wrong or inflamed."

Naruto grumbled but waited on the examining table. Finally Shizune arrived with the machine, and Tsunade realized she had been impatiently tapping her foot.

"Pull up your shirt," she ordered. Naruto grinned, and just like that, the boy she knew had returned.

"No roaming eyes, Granny," he teased, and Tsunade smacked him over the head but chuckled a little. At least he was more at ease, his blue eyes glittering again. He rubbed his head and muttered a complaint about the cold gel applied to his stomach, and Tsunade swirled the wand around for a moment as she got her bearings.

Naruto squinted at the screen."See anything yet?"

"Just give me a minute!" she snapped, eyes narrowing. She checked the kidneys first. Normal. Stomach. Normal. No ulcers or inflammation. She tried to dig deeper. She went lower, and frowned.

"What? What is it? What's wrong?" Naruto asked, noticing her furrowed brows.

"Hush!" Tsunade snapped, and leaned closer, closer, and even closer still to the screen in disbelief. She applied a little more pressure to the wand, taking a closer look at the small black bubble on screen. Odd, very odd.

"Is that-?" Shizune began, but Tsunade cut her off.

"Draw blood," she ordered.

Naruto immediately protested. "Hell no!"

"I want a sample. Now," Tsunade growled, and Naruto quieted. He winced as Shizune drew a blood sample.

"So, are you going to tell me if I'm sick or something?" He asked impatiently. Tsunade frowned.

"No, because I don't know yet, hence the blood test. I'll have the results in an hour. Sakura, admit him to a room. Depending on the results I want to do another exploratory ultrasound."

"Holy crap, I'm really sick aren't I?" Naruto groaned. Sakura looked pale.

"Is that why my head hurts?" the boy asked, searching for any kind of reason to explain this sudden ailment he guessed he had. Tsunade shook her head.

"I'm sure that's because you've been drinking, brat. I could smell it on your breath. Consider yourself damn lucky I didn't report you. Now off with you!" Once alone, she looked desperately to Shizune.

"I don't understand," Tsunade blurted out.

Shizune's brows furrowed as she thought. "It looked like-"

"I know damn well what it looked like! But there has to be another explanation. Test his blood for hCG. If the hormone's present, then it's exactly what it looked like."

Shizune looked disgruntled. "But-how can a man-"

"Through an incredibly dangerous deal with a Jinchuuriki's demon, Shizune, that's how. Very few medical professionals are aware of it, and if any know if it, they do because it's an old fairy tale. But I did extensive research with the rare and bizarre alongside a colleague of mine, and came across some reading years back in my early days as a medic nin. Even then, it seemed more legend than truth. I highly doubt any medics have placed any truth in it…until now."

Shizune paled. "Deal? Surely Sasuke wouldn't be aware-"

Tsunade cut her off once more. "Not Sasuke. Madara, he's old enough to have heard of it in his lifetime, I'm sure. Still…it doesn't make sense. Naruto would have known if someone had made contact with the very demon locked inside him! Surely he would have told me, and Naruto himself couldn't have made such a deal. The blood test better be negative, or we're in deep shit."