Chapter 4
Once out in the cool air, Kat's head began to clear. 'Whoa!' She thought. That had to have been the most intense date she'd ever been on! Her body was still reeling from the feelings John had been oh-so-good at evoking within her. Perhaps this call from Liam was a good thing after all. Considering how quickly things had turned physical between her and John, she wouldn't have been at all surprised if they'd ended up at her apartment tonight, sleeping together. Kat allowed herself a minute to imagine what that might be like but she realized that she truly couldn't. The handful of men she had previously dated were boys compared to John's skilled expertise. She could tell that just by the way that he'd kissed her and what a kiss it had been! Her lips were still tingling. A cab pulled up to her as she signaled.
'Was THAT why she felt so drawn to the man?' No, Kat shook her head as she got into the cab. There was something else there, besides the pure, unadulterated attraction she felt towards him. Something about John; his presence, his actions, the way he moved...something. She couldn't quite put her finger on it but he made her feel safe, cared for and appreciated as well as very feminine, and after spending most of her days acting like 'one of the guys; that was very important to her.
Even so, Kat wanted John to know that she wasn't in this for a one night stand. She wanted, no needed, something more than that. She picked up her phone to call him and tell him something to that effect when she suddenly decided not to; at least not until she'd dealt with the situation at the work site. She wanted to gather her thoughts before asking to him explain just what he was looking for. She knew it was awfully early on to ask, but considering how fast the physical part of whatever 'this' was had happened, she needed to make sure her emotions didn't get involved just as quickly; especially if their interests in each other weren't the same. She turned off her phone so that she wouldn't be tempted to call right now and turned her mind to how she was going to deal with the loss of equipment from her site.
John watched Kat walk out the door. He literally had to hold himself back from following her. He'd wanted so badly to offer to come with her to the site. He didn't like the fact that she was going there alone, even if the police would be there. He didn't like to think about her going alone to meet a man that; according to Kat, had a history of making up things just to get her around him. He might have to have a word or two with this Liam. Unless he was reading the situation wrong, John thought he might be justified in telling this guy that he didn't share well with others. But the police presence was the main reason why he couldn't make that offer to go with her. He couldn't take the chance that he might be recognized.
But, OH, he'd hated watching her walk out that door. He couldn't believe he'd let her go after less than an hour of their date. 'But what an hour it had been!' He smiled to himself as he got up to leave. He was elated that Kat seemed to want him as much as he wanted her. She was such a passionate woman, he doubted he'd be able to keep his hands off her the next time they met any more than he'd been able to this time.
That thought brought on another, less welcome, one. He hoped she didn't think he was just looking to have sex with her! Or worse yet, what if that was all she was looking for from him? He frowned at the thought. Would that be ok? Could he live with this being just a physical thing? One of heads said, 'Hell yes!', he was a man after all, but his heart wasn't so sure. He touched his ear, ready to dial Kat's number and... his phone beeped, startling him. He looked down the text he'd received and all the blood drained from his face.
When Kat got to the site, she was surprised not to find any police cars by the gate. Puzzled, she paid the cabbie and got out. Kat ignored the warning bells that started going off in her head the second her feet hit the gravel drive up to the site. She walked past the temporary guard station. It was empty...Where was Frank? Surely he'd be here too? 'He'd better be anyway!', because she wanted an explanation and NOW for how thieves had gotten into the site and stolen equipment, no matter how small, right out from under his nose!
Kat walked to the trailer, bewildered that there seemed to be no one around and even more odd; nothing seemed out of place from where it belonged. 'What the hell was going on here? Had Liam been able to take care of the police after all and they had all finished up, or more likely; had he called her down here under false pretenses?' If so, she was definitely going to fire his ass and not even wait until Monday!
Suddenly from behind, she felt something hard pressed against the small of her back. She heard the telltale click of a gun being cocked. "Hello Kat, thanks for coming down here so quickly." She heard Liam say in a quiet, menacing voice. "If you'll hand me your phone please." Since the words were followed by a sharp jab of the gun, she knew it wasn't a request.
"Liam, what the hell is going on here?" She asked, trying to keep her voice calm. She knew as long as he stayed close to her with the gun, she had a chance at disarming him. As if he'd read her mind, he stepped back, allowing her to turn around.
"Oh, you'll find out soon enough, Kat. Now, march over to the building and call down the elevator."
Kat reluctantly walked towards the building but just as she was passing Liam, she had an idea. She dropped her keys next to him and when she leaned down to retrieve them, she meant to swing up and hit him in a very vulnerable spot.
Unfortunately, Liam must have known what she had in mind because he stepped back away from her. "No funny business or else!" Kat was forced to stand up and Liam prodded her towards the elevator. "Get going! And take off your shoes. You'll fall if you try and walk the beams in those."
When they reached the elevator, she inserted her key into the mechanism that allowed the elevator to be raised and lowered. "Go to the third floor." Liam told her and she pressed the button. The elevator jerked into motion. Once they reached the third floor, Liam reached over and broke the key off in the mechanism so that the elevator could not be called from below. Now, the only way down would be through the material chute.
'This doesn't look good.' Kat thought. "Liam, what is going on here? Why did you call me here and where are the police?" She tried to distract him with her questions.
"Give me your hands!" Liam barked, not addressing her questions. When she didn't comply with him immediately, he raised his gun pointing it at her head. Not having any choice, she did as she was told and held out her hands. Liam tucked the gun in the waistband of his pants and proceeded to handcuff her wrists together.
'No, DEFINITELY not good.' Kat tried to fight the rising panic she was feeling. She needed to stay calm and continue to look for a way out of this. Her brother had taught her all manner of self-defense; at least ONE of them had to work sooner or later!
"Liam, please tell me what's going on! Where is Frank?"
"Well now, those handcuffs should do the trick." Liam swung Kat up over his shoulder and began to walk out on one of the I-beams that made up the skeleton of the building. "I've been paid to keep you from taking any more contracts in the city. You must have stepped on someone's dick, with those mannish ways you have. Always pretending to be tough and then flaunting yourself in front of everyone. Either way, somebody higher up the food chain wants you gone. Course, they left it up to me on HOW you'd go, so I think we'll have little fun first."
Kat trembled a little at those words. She HAD to get out of there now! Liam set her down onto the beam and she heard a chain rattling above her head. He pushed her hands above her head and linked them to a hook, so that she was hanging from a chain attached to a beam above. Her feet were barely able to touch the lone beam below and her arms ached from the strain already. The dim bulbs hanging from above revealed the expression on Liam's face that chilled her to the bone.
"See? I called you down here and look at the way you're dressed! You dressed that way just to tease me! You're such a dick tease, and now, I'm gonna give you what you've been asking for all along." Liam leered at her.
"No, Liam! I...you interrupted me on a date...I didn't..." Kat tried to get out but her mouth was so dry due to her fear. This COULDN'T be happening!
"So you'd show this..." His large hands reached over and ripped her dress off her shoulders, letting it fall down to the floors below them. "….. to another man?" Liam roared.
The fact that he wasn't worried about anyone hearing him caused Kat to realize that there would be no help coming.
"You'd let another man KISS you?" Liam said angrily and he grabbed the back of her head, pulling her to him and beginning to kiss her roughly.
Kat tried to kick him but it was like kicking a rock. He was so big that no matter how many times she kicked him, he seemed impervious to it. Liam's only response was to bite her shoulder, hard. She cried out as she felt his teeth break the skin.
"I'm in charge now, not you, bitch. I'll do what I want to you and you'll like it." He spat out. He went back to roughly kissing her and she could feel her lips bruising as a result and she tasted her own blood from his bites.
Without warning, she felt a knife against her skin between her breasts and then her bra was cut in half, totally exposing her. Kat gasped as she one of his hands closed around her breast and then he squeezed it hard.
"I knew you wanted this!" Liam snickered. "You wanted me to touch you here... and here..." He said as he cupped her through her panties.
"No, Liam. Stop, please, stop! I never..." Kat whimpered as she saw him start to unbuckle his pants.
"Stop denying it bitch!" He slapped her so hard across the face that she felt the skin on her cheek split. "You know you want me to fuck you! You've wanted it for a long time and now I'm gonna give it to you!" He hit her across the face again. "I'm gonna fuck your brains out and then I'm gonna kill you and collect my money!"
Liam dropped his pants and was in the process of reaching for her when they both heard a hard, angry voice from the shadows. Quite possibly the most wonderful sound Kat had heard in her life.
"Get your hands off her!"
Kat's head jerked up and her stomach leapt into her throat. 'John! Be careful!' She tried and failed to scream in enough time, everything happened so fast.
Liam spun around towards the voice and snarled. But in advancing to the voice and away from Kat, he made a critical mistake. Now that Kat was no longer in his line of fire, John didn't have any reason to hesitate. Three shots rang out in quick succession and Liam dropped like a stone, falling off the beam and landing with a thud three floors below. John rushed across the I-beam towards her.
"Kat!" John exclaimed, reaching up and unhooking her from the chain above. Kat's arms hurt so badly that she couldn't hold them up on her own and they dropped over John's shoulders.
"Oh, Kat, sweetheart! I'm sorry I didn't get here sooner! I tried calling..." John reached up and cupped her face in his hands. "Are you alright?" He looked at her eyes, trying to gauge how badly she had been traumatized.
Kat didn't trust herself to say anything right then so she just nodded. How he'd known that she'd needed him, she had no idea but Kat had never been so grateful to anyone in her entire life as she was to John. She looked up at him, feeling the sting of tears that had started to form. "Thank you." She whispered. "He...he was going to. He was. He was going kill me, John."
"Oh sweetheart." He said softly. John's fingers delicately traced around the cuts and what would surely be bruises tomorrow, on her face. Then he held her to him, trying with his actions, to show her that she was safe. He was here with her now and he wouldn't let anything happen to her.
Kat let herself be comforted by John for a minute or two but then she became conscious of the fact that she had nothing on except her panties. John felt her pull away. 'God! If could shoot the bastard a thousand times more, it wouldn't be enough to make up for what he'd done to her!' His eyes darkened with anger and Kat saw it. She was afraid that it was directed at her, at the fact that maybe he thought she was rejecting him after he had just saved her life. Nothing could be further from the truth!
"John, I...I need to sit down for a minute."
He quickly softened his eyes and smiled down at Kat. He deliberately locked eyes with her and gently raised her arms and removed them from his neck. Then he took her hands in his and used his considerable skills with a lock pick pulled from his pocket to open the handcuffs around her wrists all without ever looking away from her eyes.
"Let's get you home." He said.
"No, John. I can't."
John stepped back. Had he presumed too much? He wouldn't blame her if she didn't want a man around for a while but he felt an inescapable urge to protect her. "Kat, I..."
"John, I can't go anywhere yet. I have to call the police and I'm not...I'm not dressed." Kat dropped her head in embarrassment and tried to cover herself as best she could now that her hands were free.
John breathed a sigh of relief as he realized she wasn't telling him that she wanted him to go. He chastised himself for not thinking of offering her some sort of cover before now. He had been more worried about her well-being than her modesty. He removed his shirt, hoping that all his scars wouldn't scare her too much. He wrapped his shirt around her shoulders and she smiled up at him, buttoning the shirt to cover her nakedness. She noted the myriad of scars on John's body and bit back a gasp. Now was not the time to ask about them. John took her hand in his and walked her over to the elevator.
"It won't work." Kat said. "Liam had me break off...my...key..." She halted as John pried open a panel and connected two wires. The elevator lurched into movement and descended down to the ground. "Well, I guess you're a good guy to have around." She smiled at him.
John returned her smile. "I'm glad you think so."
"I need to call the police. Someone needs to do something about Liam."
"Ok, this location is part of the 8th precinct and it just so happens I know two of the homicide detectives there. Let me give you their number. You'll want to speak to them privately
and explain that I was involved. I only ask that you not tell anyone else that I was here."
It seemed like a small enough thing to ask and she nodded her agreement. She wasn't sure why he wanted to avoid the police but she trusted him enough to know he must have good reason.
Retrieving her purse from where she'd dropped it when Liam grabbed her, she used her cell to call the number John gave her. They sat down together on a pile of materials to wait. John put his arm around Kat and pulled her close. Kat snuggled up to his warmth and tried to hold back the shaking she was beginning to feel taking over her body.
John felt it and just held her tighter. As they heard the sirens approaching, John sincerely regretted the fact that he was going to have to leave her on her own to retell and relive traumatic events of tonight.
"You'd better get going John, if you want to avoid the police."
John gave her hand a squeeze. "I'll be around if you really need me."
"I know." Kat answered and watched as John walked away and melted into the shadows by the gate.
Two hours later, Kat emerged from her trailer on the site dressed in a pair of jeans and a tee shirt and carrying John's shirt. Thankfully she'd always kept a complete change of clothes, including a bra and panties at the site just for accidents or emergencies. The police had taken pictures of her injuries and a Detective Carter had taken her statement. It was a bit easier to tell her story to a woman. The detective's eyes had flickered when she'd mentioned that John Reese had saved her. At that point, the Detective had closed her notepad and nodded.
"I'll just interview your security guard if you don't mind." And Detective Carter walked over to where Frank was being treated for a concussion. He had been knocked out from behind by Liam.
The police were wrapping up their investigation and didn't need her there anymore. She'd just cleared the gate when she felt a presence next to her.
"Hi." She said shyly.
"Hello, Kat." John spoke softly. "I'm surprised the Detective didn't take you home. I figured you would feel safer being driven home rather than walking."
Kat turned to face John. "Oh, Detective Carter offered to drive me home. She was very sweet, but I had a feeling... you'd be waiting for me. And right now, there isn't another person on the planet that I feel safer with."
John reached up and ran his knuckles lightly under her jaw bone. She didn't even flinch, a testament as to how much she really did trust him. He ground his teeth together in anger at what the dead man, Liam, had done to her. Once again, he wished that the man wasn't dead, so that he could take more time to kill him again. He reached down and took her hand.
"Are you sure you're ok to walk home? I could call you a cab."
She nodded at him, "I'm ok." And then handed him his shirt. He slipped it over his broad shoulders and she was almost sad that she'd returned it.
"Let's get you home then, OK?"
"Yeah." She whispered.
They both turned and walked out to the sidewalk that surrounded the site and headed towards Kat's home. There wasn't much in the way of conversation between them as they walked. John wanted to ask her how she was doing every few feet but he got the impression that an exorbitant amount of inquiries into her state of mind would just serve to piss her off and that was the last thing that he wanted to do. He also wanted to question her further as to her thoughts on why Liam might have attacked her. But that could wait as well.
When John had received the text with Kat's name and address along with her social; he'd almost lost it. He realized than this was the second time in a month that he'd received her number. He hadn't made the connection right away between the Katherine Greyson that Stanfield had been after - with this Kat; HIS Kat. Suddenly, he couldn't get out of that coffee shop fast enough. He'd left the Lincoln at his apartment and walked down to meet Kat earlier that evening, which he'd regretted when he had to hail a cab to get to her construction site. He almost got sick thinking that he might have been too late if he hadn't met up with her this evening...he wouldn't have been able to get to her in time...to stop the bastard from... He ordered his train of thought to cease because he didn't want to deal with the possibility of failing someone else...not so soon after Harold.
He heard Kat whimper softly and felt her trying to pull her hand from his. He looked down and saw her brow furrowed in what looked like pain. He glanced down at their hands and realized that he had, in his anger, been squeezing her hand. He immediately recoiled and dropped her hand. He'd been so caught up in his own thoughts that he hadn't even realized...
He looked up at her. "God, Kat...I'm so sorry." He dropped his eyes and began walking again slowly away from her. He heard her hurry to catch up to him and start walking beside him again.
"Penny for your thoughts." She said softly. And then he felt her hand slip into his once more.
He looked down at her incredulously. How could she want to be near him, much less touch him after he'd just hurt her? She amazed him, that's for sure.
"I'm not sure you want to hear my thoughts, Kat."
"I kind of figured they weren't pleasant when you tried to go all ninja on my hand." She chuckled lightly and again, he was amazed at her resilience.
"I'm sorry Kat." He rubbed his thumb along hers as they walked.
"I know, John... I'm angry too."
'Hmm', he thought,...'resilient and insightful'. John knew that they were almost to Kat's apartment and he wasn't looking forward to leaving her there all alone. He knew that the threat had been taken care of tonight but until he found out exactly why Liam had been trying to hurt her, and whether anyone was behind Liam's attempt, he wouldn't be able to relax.
The last block that they walked wasn't in total silence. Kat talked a little about her brother Mike. He was currently serving overseas but was supposed to have a leave coming up in six months. She talked about her uncle too and how he had taken them both in when their parents had died and then how Mike had cared for her when he turned eighteen and could legally do so. He was happy to have a chance to learn some personal aspects of her life. It made him feel closer to her. He wished that he could do the same with her.
When they reached her apartment she didn't let go of his hand but instead led him up the stairs to the front door. She dug out her keys from her small purse and let them both in. He followed her up the stairs and down the hall to her second floor apartment. He hadn't expected her to bring him upstairs but he certainly didn't question the fact that she did. Maybe she was as nervous to be alone as he was to leave her like that. She unlocked her door and then took his hand again without a word of explanation.
As was his habit, his eyes immediately scanned the room when he walked in with her. A decent sized living room, a glass door that led out onto a small patio, just enough room for two chairs to fit comfortably side by side. A cozy little kitchen sat off to the left and the hall was at the back of the living room. Nice, clean place, he noticed. Not too big, but then a single woman with no husband or children didn't need anything more.
Kat let go of his hand and walked over to hang her purse on the hook. She turned to John. "Would you like something to drink?"
"Sure, anything's fine."
He watched her walk into the kitchen and grab two beers out of the refrigerator. She didn't even turn on the lights. She twisted off the caps and threw them in the trashcan and walked back over to him.
"I hope beer's ok, I don't really have the energy to mess with the mixed drinks tonight."
He reached over and took one of the bottles from her. "Kat, thank you. Beer's fine. I didn't come up expecting a fully stocked bar." He smiled a one-sided smile and then took a long pull from the bottle.
"What did you expect?" She asked him simply and then stepped closer, almost closing the distance between them. He reached behind his back and slid his gun from the waistband of his pants and set it down on the little table next to the door.
"I expected to take a look at these..." He lifted his hand and ran his finger close to the worst looking cut on her cheek, then moved to the one below that was dangerously close to her lip. "...and to get them cleaned up a bit."
She nodded and then turned away from him, crossing the living room to head down the hall. She paused and looked back at him. "First aid stuff's back here."
John took another pull from the beer and set it down on the table next to his gun then followed Kat down the hall. He stopped at the doorway where the light was shining out from the bathroom. He watched as Kat took out peroxide, a bottle of rubbing alcohol, some gauze, a pair of surgical scissors, a few Q-tips, a box of Band-aids and a tube of Neosporin. He raised his brows at her wide range of over the counter medical supplies.
"So, do you have surgical sutures in there too?" He joked.
"Yeah, do you think I need it?"
He was taken aback for a minute by her answer. 'Why in the world would she need sutures? Was she that used to being hurt, perhaps while on the job'? "Uhh.. I don't think so... Here let me take a look."
He stepped closer to her and turned her so that her back was against the sink and her wounds were in the brightest light. She hopped backwards up onto the sink next to the supplies so that she was a little higher up for him.
He cut a piece of the gauze and poured some peroxide on it and then began to clean around the largest cut on her cheek. She sat there without making a sound but he watched muscles in her jaw jump from time to time. He knew it was probably uncomfortable for her but her eyes had taken on a glazed look as he worked. The next step wasn't going to be easy for her though. The alcohol was going to burn like hell. He knew, he'd been through it before, more times than he cared to remember. He dabbed away the remaining peroxide bubbles and then poured the alcohol onto a fresh piece of gauze. The first time he touched her skin with it she jerked and her nostrils flared but that was the only indication that felt anything that he was doing. When he was finished cleaning and assessing her face, he smiled.
"Good news, no stitches needed." He reached down and touched her knee. Her eyes flickered down to his hand and then quickly back up to his face.
"What about this one?" She pulled at the neckline of her tee shirt. He leaned closer but saw nothing. When his blank look indicated that he saw nothing, she leaned back from him yanked her shirt off over her head. He was completely floored by her action.
"Kat?" He questioned. Her long hair had fallen over her shoulders and she grabbed at it, twisting it around with her hands and pulling it over her right shoulder. She pointed at a spot about half way between her neck and her left shoulder. John felt himself blanch. There was an angry looking, oval-shaped, wound that looked like a... 'God, was that a bite mark?' he thought. He stepped closer to her and leaned down to look at it more closely. He gingerly touched around the sides and this time she did audibly cry out.
"Mother fucker." He mumbled under his breath.
"Yeah, he probably was." She spat out. His laugh was just a quick exhale of air through his nose.
He grabbed another piece of gauze and started doctoring the bite. He spent extra time cleaning that one out. Sure, it was a human bite but God only knew what kind of diseases that asshole had been carrying around. When he was done, he put some of the Neosporin on a square of gauze and Kat pointed to the open cabinet under the sink. He saw the medical tape and pulled out four pieces and laid the gauze on top of the bite and then applied the four pieces of tape.
He leaned back and surveyed his work and then looked back up at her face. She was looking up at him, studying him with an intense look in her eyes. He brought his hand up to her cheek.
"Kat? You OK?"
When she finally spoke, her voice had taken on a raspy quality and he could hear it quivering slightly. "He was going to kill me you know. He was going to use my body for his own
disgusting, selfish, pleasure. Then he was going to kill me and throw my body away like a piece of garbage."
"Oh God, Kat..." John had an overwhelming urge to reach up and try to smooth away the frown that was wrinkling her beautiful face. Rather than trying to quell the urge, he allowed himself to do so. He moved closer to her, stepping between her legs. His hands cradled her face, careful not to touch the cuts as he smoothed the pads of his thumbs from the top her nose out in an arc over her eyebrows. He repeated the motion several times, with each arc he swept his thumbs higher across her forehead. "I'm so sorry I wasn't there. I won't make that mistake again."
"So... does that mean... are you leaving now?" She asked.
"Do you want me to leave?"
She shook her head no and then he felt her hands come to rest on his waist where her fingers hooked into the belt loops on either side of his jeans. Her eyes never left his.
"Please don't."
"I'll stay as long as you need me to, Kat."
He continued stroking her face until she spoke again and then his fingers stopped. "Will you stay as long as I want you to, John?"
He felt his breath catch in his throat as he tried to swallow. "Kat... I don't think..."
He was unable to finish his sentence because she slid her fingers from his waist and wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him roughly down to crush his mouth with hers. He was taken by surprise but it didn't take him long to respond to her. He felt her legs wrap around his waist and then her heels dug into the backs of his leg. John wrapped his arms around her back and pulled her up off the sink. He held her tightly against his chest as her mouth continued its sweet assault on his. Her teeth nipped and played with his lips and when she gasped for breath his tongue dove into her mouth where it was met with equal fervor from hers.
Something deep inside of him screamed that this wasn't right. He tried to ignore it but it wouldn't go away. He'd learned to listen to that little voice, warning bells, whatever you'd call it, long ago and he wasn't going to stop now. There was no way that he could allow this to go any further, not after what she'd been through earlier tonight. He tried to set her back down on the sink but she wouldn't relinquish her hold on either his neck or his waist. He pulled his head back from her so that he could try to reason with her.
"Kat..." He got out before her mouth was on his again. One of his hands slid up to cup the back of her head. He couldn't seem to stay focused on the task at hand...not with her insistent tongue sneaking its way back through his lips.
He sighed internally and tried again to pull back from her. "Kat...stop... We…"
'Better.' He thought. He was able to get out three words this time before she had him reeling again. He could tell that he was going to have to be a little more forceful with her if was going to get through to her. He stepped closer to the sink and leaned forward so that she was now sitting on the counter and then reached around behind him to pull her legs from around his waist. She whimpered but it didn't really deter her progress. He reached up and grabbed her arms and unwound them from around his neck. Her hands flew to his and started grasping at the front of his shirt, frantically trying to unbutton it. She was able to make her way halfway down before he grabbed her wrists with both of his hands and pushed them together. He pushed them back towards her chest to ease her away from him.
"Kat..."
"Please don't stop..."
"Kat, you can't...you don't want this right now." He let go of one of her wrists and placed his hand against her cheek. Her face transformed from soft and pliant to hard and angry.
"Don't..." She tried to pull away from his hand. "Don't tell me what I want."
"That's not what... I'm trying to do. I'm sorry... I." She'd misunderstood what he was trying to tell her.
She reached up with her free hand and wrapped it around his wrist. "Would you like to know what I DO want?" John started stroking her cheek with his thumb but Kat didn't give him the chance to answer her question. "What I want is to have your lips on mine. I want you to kiss me for so long that I don't remember my name..." She pulled his hand downward as she continued speaking. "I want to feel your hands..." She continued pulling his hand down over her chest, pausing to inhale deeply when she stopped his hand over her breast. "...running all over my body." She closed her eyes and he had to bite back a groan as his fingers brushed her taut nipple and then she pulled his hand further down over her stomach. Before she able to pull his hand between her legs he pulled it back completely. Her eyes snapped open and turned up to his. "What I DON'T want to feel, is that bastard's lips bruising mine, or his knife slicing open my bra, or his hand..." She pulled his hand roughly between her legs. "...here." She cocked a brow up at him, her forehead once again wrinkling into a harsh frown. "Would you like to know what else I DON'T want to feel John?" Again, she didn't leave him enough time to respond, but he had a feeling that she wasn't necessarily wanting a response. "His teeth, John...pressing down so hard into my skin that it breaks and bleeds, all while I'm trying to convince him that I didn't dress like I did just to tease him."
John watched as she fought valiantly to keep from crying. All he wanted to do was wrap her in his arms and make her feel safe, make her forget... But he knew that she needed to get this out so he stood there quietly and just listened until he knew that she was ready for him to speak.
"I didn't... I don't want those to be my last thoughts today..." She was breathing heavily and her face was flushed in her anger. She pulled his hand from between her legs and brought it up to rest on her cheek. Then she pulled her other hand free from his grasp. She grabbed onto his hips and pulled him closer to her so that he was nestled tighter between her legs. "Please John, I want your lips on mine. I want to feel your hands on me... everywhere... I want to feel your teeth brush against my skin because I know you won't break it like some kind of rabid dog." She swallowed hard as the tears that had been pooling in both eyes. One spilled over to run down the side of her face, while another ran only as far as fingers. "What I want..." Her voice broke and then she continued in a much softer voice. "What I want is to forget."
She went to grab his other hand that had come to rest benignly on the counter next to her but he pulled it back before she reached it. The tortured look in her eyes grabbed onto his heart and squeezed with the force of a thousand fingers. He slowly and deliberately raised his hand to rest firmly against her other cheek, taking care to not touch the cuts there.
"Kat...you don't have to make me touch you. I already want to... so bad...it hurts. I hope you know that." His thumbs started caressing her face; gently wiping away the tears. He leaned down and touched his lips to her forehead and then leaned back. "But...this isn't how it should be...not our first time." He leaned forward again and lightly pressed his lips to hers then leaned back again.
A fresh set of tears spilled down her cheeks onto his fingers. "Oh God..." She started. That same stricken look returned to her face.
"What...what's wrong, Kat?"
She tried to lower her head but his hands held it up. Kat grabbed onto his wrists and tried to pull them away. "No, don't... don't look at me."
He whispered. "Please, tell me what's wrong."
"You must think I'm completely out of my mind...coming on to you like that...after I was almost...Oh God...Only a whore would... Oh God!" She wailed.
"No..." He wrapped his long arms around her and pulled her against his chest. "No, no, no... I don't think that Kat; not at all!"
Her sobs wracked her body as she tried to push him away. "How could you NOT think that."
He raised his voice to make sure that she heard him over her crying and struggling. "Because, I'm not HIM!" He wasn't sure if it was his words or the tone of voice, but Kat froze. The only thing that moved was the rise and fall of her chest. He prayed to God that he hadn't frightened her to the point of sending her into shock. He held her for another minute before he leaned back and looked down at her. Her head fell forward, her hair hung down on either side of her face essentially hiding her from him. He reached out and swept both sides behind her shoulders where he twisted it so that it wouldn't fall forward again.
He took a chance and spoke very softly to her. "Kat?"
She didn't raise her head, she just shook it slowly back and forth. "Oh John... I'm so...so very sorry."
"Hey... don't apologize. You have nothing to be sorry for."
"Yes I do." She slowly looked up at him.
Her eyes were bloodshot and puffy, her cheeks were stained from the tracks of her tears, her nose and her cheeks were dark pink, and he thought she was achingly beautiful. He had no idea how he was going to restrain himself tonight; if she even still wanted him to stay with her. If he had to sleep on the floor to keep himself under control, then he would.
"I do... You saved my life. You could have taken advantage of the situation at any time and you didn't... You've been nothing but a gentleman and I've been nothing but..."
"A trusting, traumatized and scared woman, with every right to... lose it a little."
She sniffed and wiped at her face with short jerky movements. 'Yeah...and come on to the guy that put his own life on the line to save me, then yell at him when he doesn't reciprocate? Yeah, I'd say I lost it...I lost it a lot, John."
"Oh Kat...make no mistake... I wanted, I want to reciprocate. I want YOU...more than you know. Please understand. I don't do..." He waved his hand between the two of them. "...this...I don't have one night stands...and especially not... I want... this to go further...but not tonight."
He watched as a single tear rolled down her face. "Please don't leave tonight. You can have my bed, I'll sleep on the couch...just... don't leave."
"I would have slept outside on your doorstep, Kat."
"Oh..." She gasped. She leaned forward and wrapped her arms around him. He held her close until she leaned back and looked up at him. "Can you... " She dropped her eyes.
"What? Look at me please, Kat."
She slowly looked up at him through hooded eyes. Her cheeks that had finally cooled a minute ago were now flaming red again. "I want you...to kiss me." She inhaled sharply before could respond and continued. "I...please...I'm not asking for anything else tonight...I..." He cut her off by lowering his mouth to hers. As he slowly pressed his lips against hers, she made the sweetest little sound. He continued kissing her like that for several minutes before he parted her lips with his and sucked her lower lip between his. Her hands left his body and grabbed onto the edge of the sink. He pulled back from her immediately, worried that he'd gone too far.
"What's the matter...are you ok?"
"Well..yes... why did you stop?"
He searched her face, taking in her lips that had turned a rosy pink from his own and then he saw her dilated pupils. Maybe he'd misunderstood... He glanced down at her hands holding the edge of the counter in a death grip. Her eyes followed his.
"Oh...um..." She grinned sheepishly up at him. "If I didn't get my hands off you, I was going to start ripping your clothes off."
He closed his eyes and felt the grin lift one side of his mouth. "It's getting late, Kat. Are you going to take a shower before bed?"
She grinned back at him before answering. "Actually, I'd like to take a bath and I'm sorry to say that you're not invited...this time."
He pulled her off the counter into his arms and kissed her fully on her smart little mouth and then quickly set her back on her feet. She swayed against him as her eyes blinked open.
"Well then, I look forward to next time." He said with a wicked smile and then turned and left the bathroom. He heard her sigh forcefully and when he turned around and sat down the living room couch, he saw her peek around the doorway at him... she winked and then quickly disappeared back into the bathroom. He heard the water start and then he saw her dart across the hall into where he assumed her bedroom was and then back into the bathroom with a change of clothes. She was in there for about forty-five minutes before he heard the tell-tale sign of the water draining from the tub. When she emerged she looked more like the woman that he'd met earlier that night.
"I put some clean clothes in there that should fit you...if you'd like to take a shower." She paused at the look on his face. "No...they're not an ex-boyfriend's, they're my brother's. He's not quite as tall as you but they'll do if you want to get cleaned up."
"I think I may do that, thank you." John rose from the couch and walked over to her. He wrapped his arms around her in a quick hug and kissed her forehead before he headed to bathroom.
When he emerged from the bathroom, the steam poured out in waves behind him. He looked down the hall towards the living room but didn't see Kat on the couch. He glanced into the room across the hall where a small lamp cast a warm glow that exited in a rectangular block of light out into the hall. He walked in and Kat was lying on the bed wrapped in blankets. He almost turned around and headed to the couch but something drew him to her. He leaned over her and gently swept a few strands of hair off of her face. She stirred as he withdrew his hand. He felt her hand on his as he turned to go.
"Stay...please? There's plenty of room." She looked up at him imploringly. "I promise to be on my best behavior."
He grinned down at her. God help him, he was not able to refuse her. He sat down on the edge of the bed and slid his long legs under the sheet and blankets. He leaned over and gave her a chaste kiss on her forehead. Then he slid his left arm under her back and wrapped his right arm over her stomach and pulled her towards him as he lay down, her back resting firmly against his chest, his arms still wrapped securely around her.
He felt her sigh and then her hands wrapped around his as she whispered. "Thank you, John."
"You're welcome, Kat. Good Night."
"Good Night, John."
He settled in against her warm body and within minutes...against all odds, he was asleep.