Nayru's Note: I wanted to finish this chapter before leaving for New Year's Eve, and I managed. Somehow. Cheers! o/

... Hopefully it won't give off the impression of being rushed. 8D;;

An awesome next year to you, guys! c:

~4 Idiots In A Closet~
Chapter 04: Worst day of his life, he said

Conan waited in front of the house, trying to assess the situation (since his other method of contact failed him), before he ended up making any reckless moves that would potentially get the thief into trouble. Seeing that someone else besides Kid was clearly inside of the building, he decided to lay in standby. Thankfully, Okiya and Araide were patient enough to wait together with him inside of the car for another hour.

Once the girl - which looked astonishingly similar to Ran - went out through the front door and left, he figured the coast was finally clear. He asked Subaru to wait for their return while he exited the car together with the doctor.

Well, he did mention that he'd still like to make sure of Kid's condition when the other woke up back at his place. Hopefully the thief wouldn't hold his good intentions against him.

When he rang the bell of the house, however… he definitely didn't expect Hakuba to be the one to open the door before them.

Crap!

He couldn't blame the half-British detective to look as surprised as he was. He had no idea someone else beside that dark-haired girl was still there.

"… Edogawa Conan-kun?"

Shinichi tried his best not to panic. They needed to improvise.

"Ah, Hakuba-niichan! What a surprise to see you here!" The small boy exclaimed in his cheerful, child-like voice that usually got everyone fooled. "I've heard niichan got sick, so I brought doctor Araide to check up on him!"

'Niichan' being the thief, who's real name Conan wasn't even aware of. He couldn't really call him 'Kaitou Kid-niichan' in front of the other detective, obviously, so that alone needed to work.

"Sorry for intruding so out of the blue," doctor Araide added, sounding modest as always. "But I've been told that the cold was really bad, so we hurried over. I'd like to get a look at the fellow, if you wouldn't mind."

Of course, Conan already told him the truth about what happened. Without giving away too much details, that is. He had the advantage of Araide trusting Jodie and him after the whole thing with Vermouth, and the doctor understood this was one of those things that needed to be kept secret, for one reason or another, no questions asked. He didn't want to endanger anyone, and to him, the boy's health and well-being was what mattered the most. He was a doctor, after all. He just wanted to help.

Hakuba frowned at them, his expression turning serious, and Conan had to wonder just how much any of this was giving away to him. They've never stumbled upon one another on any of Kid's heists before, but he's heard that the detective attended to them quite regularly just like he did. And the thief did mention that the guy was onto him…

"Not at all," Saguru finally answered in a calm tone, moving out of the way. "Please, come in."

Kaito was on the verge of flipping his shit and jumping right out the window, the moment he saw Conan in his house. Then he realized such an action would probably only make things worse for him. Even if he'd make his escape, Hakuba would sell him out, and Shinichi already knew Kaitou Kid was somehow connected to this house, otherwise he wouldn't be here in the first place.

This just wasn't his day.

… He brought a doctor along? The one he mentioned to him earlier? Well, Hakuba already fixed him up, so he imagined it was kind of unnecessary. But Conan couldn't have known that.

Araide insisted for the two detectives to leave them alone for the time being, so that he could check up on Kaito properly and ask him a few questions - to the thief's utter horror. Leaving Hakuba and Conan in the same room right now just screamed disaster for him. If they exchanged information, even God wouldn't be able to help him anymore.

He really wanted to jump through that window and make a run for it.

Kid looked… somewhat panicked to see him. Yeah, he was really starting to wonder whether any of this was a good idea. Showing up in front of the other detective like this probably made the whole situation only worse for the thief.

Conan watched the bed-ridden boy - and Kid watched him back with a very unamused look on his face (like he was silently judging him for something) - as Araide closed the door before them, leaving the two detectives to a stretching, awkward silence.

From the corner of his eye, Conan noticed a family photo standing next to a huge information board with all kinds of messy notes on it.

"What are you doing here, anyway, Hakuba-niichan?"

Conan's child-like, oblivious act was on again. It's not like he was about to show any of their cards, regardless.

"You can drop the act." Unfortunately, Hakuba wasn't someone to be fooled easily, probably catching on on their behavior, as subtle as it was. His tone of voice was serious and sharp. "I know he's been shot."

Conan went silent, not really sure what to say, or how to argue with that. Did that mean Hakuba already found out…?

"You attended the heist, didn't you? You wouldn't be here for any other reason, either." The half-British detective spoke up again, since Conan didn't. A tiny smirk suddenly made its way to his lips, putting Shinichi only more off-track. "I'm actually surprised you're trying to keep his identity secret from me. May I ask why?"

The smaller boy stared at the other, still trying to figure out whether Hakuba really, really knew the truth or simply tried to act as if he knew without having any actual proof, wanting to lure him into a trap and have him admit it.

Damn, he wished Kid could confirm this for him. Hakuba's already seen his demeanor during the two cases they were solving earlier, both at Sunset Mansion and the Detective Koushien, so continuing trying to play dumb probably wasn't the best of ideas. Unlike Kogoro, the high-school detective wasn't an idiot he could fool with petty words.

"It's… the least I could do." Conan decided to admit, still a little hesitant. "Especially when he got shot because of me."

Well, at least this seemed to be news to the other detective. "Because of you?"

"Yeah… That bullet was meant for me. He jumped into the line of fire." The smaller boy sighed in defeat. "I fail to count how many times that idiot thief has saved my life by now, honestly. I may not know him on a personal level, but… He's definitely not one of the bad guys."

Hakuba frowned at that, falling quiet.

"…You're planning to turn him in after he gets better, don't you?" Came the inevitable question, Conan's voice suddenly turning more soft.

To his surprise, that earned him a smile from Hakuba. But there was something bitter in his expression, an odd kind of amusement in it.

"… I'm not sure myself anymore, to be honest."

The smaller detective blinked, not expecting that kind of answer.

"After the case with Nightmare… he started to confuse me as well."

"… Nightmare?"

Hakuba closed his eyes, then turned to approach the counter, setting the kettle to boil without a word. Conan got the impression that this was a topic for a longer conversation, but was willing to listen just the same.

"Kid went out of his way to shield a child from a horrible truth that would change its life forever, endangering himself in the process." Hakuba finally explained, purposely not mentioning too many details. "There was also the thing with Ryoma's three treasures." Which Conan was part of, so no further elaboration was needed. That case was officially out in the open, at least. "I tried doing more thorough research on all of the other heists I didn't attend to, but police reports don't cover even half of what I'd like to know, and I'm sure a lot of motives are still left in the dark."

That was the police force for you. Not that Shinichi wanted to be an ass, but for inspector Nakamori and his task force, who had been chasing after Kaitou Kid for almost twenty years now, they weren't doing much of a good job at all, were they?

"The fact is that Kid always returns what he steals. So why is he doing it in the first place?" Saguru went on, clearly noticing that Conan was interested in what he was saying. "He's not doing it just for fun, he's not that kind of insane. There needs to be something more to the whole picture, something we're missing..." He trailed off, before admitting: "Right now, more than turning him in, I want to find out why he's doing it."

All of a sudden, Conan could kind of understand why Kid had been panicking in regards to Hakuba so much. He was taking all of this pretty seriously. Being on the half-British detective's deductive side needed to be one hell of a adventure.

"He told me you were suspecting him since a while now, and I think I can see why he was so worried." Conan admitted with a hint of amusement. "He mentioned that you even enrolled to his class as a transfer student, just to observe him?"

"Oh? He even mentioned that to you?" Saguru seemed… oddly proud of himself. "Just what is your relationship with Kaitou Kid, Edogawa-kun? I thought you two were enemies."

"We are! … In a sense. Things simply got… a bit complicated lately." Conan went on defense, although he didn't sound very convincing. "I still want to catch him. Just… not like this."

"So it's not fair if an outside force ends up interrupting the chase?" There was no surprise in Hakuba's voice, although Conan couldn't tell if he also understood and followed that way of thinking, or whether he found it absurd. "So honorable of you, Edogawa-kun."

It occurred to the smaller boy that Hakuba wasn't talking to him as if he were just a mere seven-year-old. During the Detective Koushien, Saguru did point out that he was surprisingly good at deductions, but… he was actually surprised to see someone taking him this seriously just after meeting him twice.

Well, three times now.

"Something like that," Conan admitted. "But I do agree with the fact that there needs to be something more to the whole picture. I could… tell you more about the heists I've attended to myself, if you want."

"I would like that, yes."

This sounded like an interesting plan, actually. If they combined all the information they had, maybe they could deduce more out of everything. However…

"What do you say we do that with all three of us present, though?"

"With Kid?"

Hakuba seemed slightly surprised with the suggestion, but he definitely wasn't averse to the idea. Which was good. Shinichi somehow had the weird feeling that if some of Kid's true motives came out into the open, Hakuba would reconsider turning him in to the police altogether.

Sigh. … He really wasn't sure why he wanted to help the stupid thief out this much. Yet somehow, here he was, doing his best to make things work in his rival's favor.

Well, he was obviously curious about the whole thing himself, as well. He could stick to that.

"Who could give us better answers than the person who's the source of the questions himself?"

Assuming Kid would even want to talk to them about any of this. … Then again, they did have a lot of blackmail material in their hands right now. He was pretty sure Hakuba wouldn't be reluctant to use it against him, if the thief didn't want to cooperate.

Which… would be a bit of a dick move on their part. But the milk was already spilled all over the place, anyway.

"You do have a point." Saguru agreed. "That guy might be a bit bitter right now… and probably scared, too."

Kaitou Kid, scared?

"But I think having a serious conversation with him might be a good idea, indeed." Hakuba admitted, then paused, before adding in an equally serious tone: "Here's to hope he won't disguise himself as that doctor of yours and make a run for it, first opportunity he gets. I wouldn't even be surprised if that happened."

Hey, hey… This was no laughing matter. Though Hakuba did have a point. He was prepared for everything when it came to Kid, wasn't he? And for someone wounded and having trouble moving, he definitely wasn't underestimating the thief.

"For the record… this wasn't the first time someone tried to shoot him down during a heist."

Oh? "Are you talking about Scorpion?" The female sniper that always aimed for the right eye? Kid ended up being a target when he stole the Faberge egg. Heiji and him were there - saw it happen, even.

"Not just Scorpion… there are more people after him. And that idiot is well aware of it."

Now this was news to him. The heists Conan attended to so far seemed mostly harmless, from what he was aware of. He also understood the fact that not everyone might have been a big fan of the thief, but… Hakuba wouldn't make it sound so serious if it wasn't. Was Kaitou Kid stealing despite knowing he was endangering his life while at it?

"Um… Hakuba-kun, right?" Araide was the one to suddenly interrupt their conversation, getting the two detectives' attention. Was he done with the check-up? "May I have a word with you?"

"Of course."

Saguru complied and approached the doctor to talk. Meanwhile, Conan didn't dwell on it for too long and used the opportunity to slip inside of the thief's room unnoticed. Kid still seemed to be in bed, but he was sitting up.

The thief was giving him the most unamused look ever.

He hated today. With passion.

"Let me guess. I am carrying a transmitter somewhere on me."

He was just so preoccupied with the whole thing with Hakuba that he didn't even… think about it. Kaito sighed, as if he couldn't believe himself. He swore he wasn't usually this stupid. Getting all friendly with the small detective wasn't doing him any favors.

"… I should get a red card for this."

His father must have been rolling around in his grave for the second time that day.

"Red card?" Conan had to wonder if the thief even knew the meaning behind one, because he wasn't exactly using it properly. "I left a badge in the pocket of your pants, actually. And I was trying to contact you. But you weren't answering."

"… You're kidding me."

Okay, so Shinichi knew that he wouldn't take it with him willingly, hence why he didn't mention a thing about it. Kaito wasn't sure whether to be mad or thankful.

It took a few seconds of searching around, but Kuroba eventually managed to find the piece of metal with the silhouette of Sherlock Holmes embedded on it. He inspected it curiously. The Detective Boys' badge, it was the first time he got to see it up-close.

"I didn't hear anything." Maybe he called when Hakuba was pressing him down to the mattress… Kaito grimaced at the realization of how wrong that thought sounded.

"Well, I wanted to make sure it was safe for doctor Araide to make his appearance, but I also considered the possibility of you passing out again, so… I didn't know Hakuba might still be here."

"Yeah, I get that…" The thief murmured, clearly not liking any of it, but trying to suck it up. "To be honest, I'm actually… somewhat glad you came."

They might have been on opposing sides of everything, but Kaito had to admit, he trusted Shinichi more with his secrets than he trusted Hakuba. He wasn't even sure why. Maybe it was because they both had a secret identity they wanted to keep.

And Hakuba was an arrogant asshole who just couldn't mind his own business. He hated that guy sometimes. … Even if he did help him out with the bleeding and bandage change. … And made food for Aoko and him.

Goddammit.

"You were right, by the way." Kuroba admitted with a defeated sigh. "I should have stayed at your place when you told me to. Confronting Hakuba in the state I was in was stupid. It just made everything worse in the end. It would be less of a hassle if I didn't show up at all." He ran head-first into the whole mess like some kind of idiot. "Worst day of my life, I swear."

Conan had to admit, it was… weird, seeing his rival like this. He almost seemed like a different person. Kaitou Kid was always so calm and composed, acted like he knew what he was doing at all times; didn't even see failure as an option. Kuroba seemed… more wild. More goofy.

Was this the real him? Which side of him was an act?

"Oh, well."

Before Conan knew it, there was a yellow rose before him. He blinked at it in confusion, his brain undoubtedly trying to wrap around the fact how it could have appeared out of thin air like that.

Silly detectives.

"Kuroba Kaito, aspiring magician." The other grinned, extending his hand with the flower out to the smaller boy. "Pleasure to meet you, Tantei-kun."

If he was going down anyway, he figured he might as well go down with style. He was used to making a good face to a bad game.

"… A magician, huh? That explains a lot." Conan's smile had… something apologetic in it. "Well, you already know who I am."

His favorite critic wasn't playing along. Kuroba pouted. "You're no fun."

The smaller boy eventually reached for the flower, taking it in his hand. He stared at it thoughtfully.

"But, wait… Kuroba…" Conan mused. "Kuroba… where have I heard that name before?"

"Hm?" Kaito made an intrigued sound, wondering how it might sound familiar to the detective. "Well, my dad used to be a famous magician… but I somehow doubt you were interested in that kind of thing all those years back."

Maybe he's heard something, though? Shinichi did tend to act as if he were a walking trivia box and encyclopedia sometimes.

"Ah!" Something clicked? "Kuroba Toichi was your dad?"

Kaito blinked because it seemed like Conan just connected something, and he had no clue what it was. "How did you…?"

"My mom took disguise lessons from your dad." He explained. "Together with… Sharon Vineyard." He had to stop himself from saying 'Vermouth' and vaguely wondered how weird this whole situation actually was.

Kaito frowned, taking a moment to think, and then—

"Eeeh?!" He screamed in both awe and surprise, clearly connecting some dots. "Yukiko-san?!"

"Ha, ha…" Conan's laugh was weak - so very weak - lacking amusement whatsoever. "I can't believe this."

Their parents knew each other. For years. The Kudo family had been friends with people involved with Kaito Kid's persona without even being aware of it all this time.

Honestly, what were the odds…

"This is awesome." Kaito laughed, more amused than anything. "Small world, eh? I remember meeting her at least once - I recall her being really pretty, by the way - and I think she scolded me for something…"

"I also met your father once." Conan admitted, interrupting the other's trail of thought. "Together with Ran. It was… around ten years ago, I think."

At their old school, during the night, at that. The crazy magician handed them a leather money pouch with a riddle inside that he didn't get to understand the actual meaning of until just recently. Thinking back on it, what kind of crazy scenario just were they involved in?

"What's more amusing in all of this, is the fact that our dads apparently had some kind of… rival thing going on."

Well, if they would look at their sons now.

"No way, no way!" Kuroba couldn't be more amused with the whole thing. "Doesn't it make you think they were related somehow? I mean, just look at us."

Kaito grinned, something sinister glinting in his eye.

"… Unless… Your mom had an affair with my dad…"

"Don't." Conan warned. "Don't even go there. God. Thanks for the mental images…"

The boy caught the upper part of his nose in-between fingers, adding pressure to it as he closed his eyes, trying to fight off all the disturbing thoughts.

"My work here is done."

It couldn't have been true, and they both knew it. It didn't even work like that, even if it did turn out their fathers were some long, lost… twins. Or something. Still, who would Kaito be if he saw a perfect trolling opportunity and didn't use it?

Before Conan's thoughts could run any more wild, Hakuba entered the room, getting their attention. It was his cue to move.

"I already saw Araide-san off." The blond-brown-haired detective assured, gesturing for him to stay in place. "He prescribed you an antibiotic and some painkillers, in case you needed them, Kuroba. And he gave me some instructions on how to handle that wound of yours for the next two weeks."

"Joy." Kaito sounded anything but happy.

Conan flipped his phone open, calling Subaru to tell him it was okay to leave without him, and to drop Araide off back at the clinic. He also thanked him and assured he'd go back on his own a little later. He didn't want to involve Agasa (or Haibara, for that matter) in any of the things related to Kid, so Okiya was like a godsend to him right now.

"Also… I apologize, but I ended up overhearing your conversation." Hakuba admitted, his voice oddly careful. "Or, well, part of it, anyway."

Kaito shrugged, clearly not minding it that much. They left the door open, after all. It's not like it was a big deal or a secret, the whole thing regarding their parents.

Oh. Wait.

Meanwhile, Conan's blood ran cold from the admission, and he just stood there, staring at Hakuba with an insecure frown on his face. Kuroba was quick to realize that the stare was mutual.

Oh, shit.

"Edogawa-kun, how old did you say you were again?"

The little detective didn't answer, obviously well aware where this was going.

"You said… you met Kuroba's father ten years ago."

Silence fell upon the room.

"Aaand it's out! Sorry about this, Tantei-kun."

Kaito suddenly interrupted in a loud, obnoxious voice, and Conan could only look at him with horror written all over his face.

"Wait—"

"You see, Hakuba," Kuroba went on, ignoring whatever protests Conan had. "We try to keep this a secret from people because not many would even believe it. But since you've already caught up on it… Tantei-kun here said something like that because—"

The thief was trying to keep a straight face as he gesticulated with his hands, his voice dead serious.

"This guy remembers his past life."

…

What.

"Like I said, it's not something many people would believe."

Yes, yes, his poker face was on his side. Hakuba could look at him funny all he wanted.

"He was great detective in his past life and that's why he's also so good at it now, despite being so young. Reincarnation is a thing!"

… Shinichi had no idea if this was actually genius or if he wanted to facepalm and call Kid a mental case.

"… I was wrong about you, Kuroba." Hakuba suddenly spoke up, beating him to the punch. He sounded so horribly unimpressed… "You're not just crazy. You're completely out of your mind."

Conan couldn't help himself.

He snorted.

Then he ended up laughing, almost like that time Jodie called Heiji a foreigner. "Isn't he?"

"Hey! Why aren't you going along with it?" Kaito almost sounded offended, but mostly just displeased. He was trying to help him here, and for what? "No fun. No fun at all, Tantei-kun!"

"He's great at improvising, though. I think we both have to give him that."

There was that hint of fondness in Conan's voice again, and Kaito could at least see that Shinichi was still thankful to him, despite turning down his help.

"Thanks, Kid… Ah, I guess I should call you Kuroba now." He smiled. "But I think that kind of scenario would just complicate things even more than it's worth."

Kaito seemed to sober up at that, watching the little detective as he turned to the blond-brown-haired boy next to him. He could see the resolve in his eyes. He's clearly made his mind up about this… but why? Was he really willing to give it up that easily? Or was there something more to it?

"This information might get you in danger. Are you really sure you want to know?"

Getting an ally like Hakuba, though… if that's what Shinichi was aiming for, he couldn't really blame him. The idea sounded nice, even to him. But that was assuming Saguru could keep a secret and was even willing to keep all of this to himself to begin with. There was always the possibility of this going all kinds of wrong.

They weren't exactly the most normal bunch out there.

Then again, he wouldn't be the first person to find out. Shinichi already had a lot of loose ends when it came to his identity.

"What kind of danger?" Hakuba seemed both careful and curious.

"'People who are after me wanting to kill everyone involved with me' kind of danger." Shinichi's voice was dead-serious; he definitely wasn't joking about that.

Kaito knew he wasn't. He had an encounter with one of those guys on the Bell Tree Express himself, after all. Dangerous times. He still thought back on the whole ordeal sometimes.

"He's not joking about that, Hakuba."

Kuroba interrupted, deciding to lay back down on the mat, snaking his hands under his head and crossing them together to make things more comfortable for himself. He sighed, closing his eyes. He was out, he wouldn't be part of this conversation, it was between the two detectives now. But he could still leave his two cents, if only to make Hakuba reconsider.

"So think about it carefully. There may be no points of return, and all that."

The half-British detective stared at Kaito for a moment, clearly contemplating the warning, but his expression was mostly unreadable.

"I take it this isn't something the police can just handle."

"Not really, no." Conan answered this time, closing his eyes.

"Well, I'm a detective. It's not like I would be able to turn the other way and give this a rest by now, anyway. It just isn't in my nature." That, Shinichi could understand very well, at least. "So if you trust me enough, please, tell me what this is about."

And so, the curtain had dropped.

"Tea?"

"Tea." Hakuba agreed and moved, intending to make his way back into the kitchen. Kaito observed him intently, as if unsure whether he approved of his decision or not.

"So, Kuroba?"

"Hm?" He looked at the small boy that called out his name, not really expecting to be bothered about anything else at this point.

"Will this day be a little less bad for you if you're not the only one who's identity ends up being revealed?"

The question took Kaito totally off-guard and it probably showed. He didn't even try to keep his poker face intact.

Something swelled in his chest and he felt like hugging his favorite critic for being so thoughtful of him.

Best partners in crime around, indeed.

—t.b.c.