Chapter 20: Break
The air seemed to vibrate with building tension even long after Takuya had left and the room fell into silence.
A detached part of Izzy's brain wondered why no one had said anything yet and if they were all simply not finding their voice or waiting for some else to break the silence. Izzy himself belonged to the latter group since he had had considerably longer to come to terms with the younger boy's words and actions.
Surprisingly, or perhaps not, it was Kari who snapped the string keeping everyone quiet. "Humanity?" her voice was shaking. "What did he mean, Izzy?" Her eyes were wide and fearful and latched with guilt as her eyes searched for the resident genius to reap answers she was afraid to know.
Izzy sighed, tired, resigned, not really wanting to be the one doing the explaining even though it was him who breached the subject in the first place.
While he intellectually knew he did made the right choice in consideration to the future, it did not subdue his emotions or give him a clear direction as to what to say.
"Just what he said," he managed to press out after a while. 'Just what he said', indeed. There was nothing else Takuya could have said to bring his point across with so little words, no other word that could possibly have hit them harder with all the bitterness attached.
Izzy, though, made himself no illusions.
The bitterness was not because of the situation itself, but rather because Izzy - a stranger, a member of an other group, an outsider- had messed with business that wasn't his to discuss.
That was most likely how Takuya - Agnimon? Takuya and Agnimon? Or somebody new?- saw this situation.
"But he looked perfectly human to me." Davis said, confusion evident with his brows furrowed.
Harry cleared his throat. "Perhaps I should explain," he started, unsuccessfully trying to slip in a professional mode, "As, you said, Davis, Takuya does look human, and that fact isn't wrong yet, but only for the time being." He paused, a hand on his chin as he thought about a way to explain.
"You see, when Digimon enter the real world, their data manifests and becomes a copy of human flesh. But that is just it; digital data might look like flesh and have the same attributes, but it is not exactly the same. Data can never turn fully into original flesh, while at the same time flesh can never become the exactly same type of data the Digiworld is made of.
"When humans enter the Digiworld their flesh becomes data, but if you will, with a 'marker', an extra code, attached that ensures human data turns into flesh again when leaving the digital world. So in the end data is data and flesh is flesh. It is never exactly the same no matter how similar it is.
"And usually those 'markers' are impossible to remove or to create. Takuya and his friends, however, show on a digital translation failure on a molecular level.
"In other words, when Takuya returned from the Digiworld parts of his body failed to be reconverted into flesh and blood, remaining as data instead. It isn't deadly or dangerous, but the parts of his body that turned into data will never be his original flesh and blood.
"Takuya's digivice's most important function was to protect those 'markers' so that even during a fusion of a digital and human data it was guaranteed that the human data could be translated back into flesh and blood at any given time.
Not using a digivice, however, destroyed these 'markers' and will slowly, we are not sure about how yet, replace flesh and blood with the digital make up of Digimon.
"Sadly, the phenomena as an entirety is spread throughout his entire body. Now some of his cells are made of digital flesh while others are no different than before and luckily they work together just fine; but even though it is not life threatening it does not make the situation any less grave. At the moment it might only be a few million cells of billions, but with time, we think, his body's inner structure might become fundamentally different from a human's. Already we noticed in our analyses that more energy than normal is diverted to muscles and senses instead of some organs."
When Harry finished his explanation Izzy would have preferred not to take note of the emotions reflected on his friends' faces, but he had to. Not only because he could predict what would be directed at him soon, but also, because he needed to know the depth and direction of their reaction to promote cooperation between the two groups at a later point.
What he saw could have been worse, Izzy decided.
From confusion to anger to guilt to sadness.
"And there is no way of reversing the process," Izzy added, once he was more or less sure Harry's information had sunk in and his friends were ready to hear more. "Moreover, I think we have to be prepared for changes in attitude. Since he literally fused with one of his partners so it is only logical to think that their personalities did or still do the same."
All eyes flashed to him when Izzy raised his voice, making him feel like he had run into a brick wall when accusing, angry, guilty, pleading and sad glares sought his eyes.
It stopped his thinking processes dead and suddenly he felt so much more awful than before.
Because he couldn't reassure his friends, or say there was a way around it, or that it only sounded so bad, or that he hadn't known beforehand. Because he had known, in fact, and still agreed and helped. And he couldn't even say he didn't regret it, even though he should, because he had possibly allowed two children, two friends to commit an act that cut their future, hopes and dreams short.
Then Matt groaned, disarming all sparks rising in the air and stopping Izzy's emotional internal rant. "Just what we need. It wasn't like we didn't have any problems in the first place. Now we got a few teenagers with multiple personalities on top of all."
"I agree," Ken stated sternly.
"We have a problem. So, Tai, what do we do?" Mimi asked, serious for once.
The former goggle head cut a bandaged hand through his unruly brown hair, sighing. "Half of Takuya's group is still missing, the others unconscious and, if Izzy is right, he has to fight with a split personality. If Takuya himself isn't sure what he wants or who he is, we can't clear our … opposing opinions with each other's ... attitude.
"And we aren't in the best condition to act actively.
"So there really isn't much we can do. But Izzy," suddenly there was a sharp edge in Tai's eyes and voice, "you knew about this price from the beginning?"
It wasn't really a question, more a statement, but despite already knowing the answer Tai still dared him to confirm it true.
The air got thicker and the temperature in the room seemed to grow hotter, making Izzy wish to either leave or change out of the uncomfortable hospital robes, but despite the apparent heat a cold knot had settle in his stomach.
He swallowed, his fingers twitching in a nervous habit.
"When I came up with this plan," he began, thoughts no longer rattling a thousand miles a minute, "I had already promised not to talk about this matter to anyone but Gennai."
Silence.
Hard looks.
"They made me promise," he explained, almost pleading his friends to understand. "Takuya said they both wouldn't be reckless with and I would have never agreed to this if we hadn't been so pressed for time to save lives; Takuya's and Koichi's needed the additional strength.I made a strategy with the highest percentage of success possible under the circumstances.
"If I had told beforehand there was a possibility to be distracted by guilt or some of you would have just risked more to prevent the from fighting. But we couldn't risk more than we already did.
"Just look around, everyone, we are all in hospital as it is. Without Agnimon's assistance some of us might have died. On Cody's side even more so. There hadn't been another choice."
Izzy paused, taking a deep breath and swallowing. "I don't think we could have stopped Takuya anyway. He is too much like you and Davis, Tai. And it's his friends that are in danger. Do you think you would have stood by?"
A few still glared at him, Tai one of those, but the Digidestined of Courage averted his eyes after a moment. "I can't deal with this now. And Takuya has to say something in this anyway, he isn't exactly available, though."
Yolei pressed her back to the cool stone of a house in whose shadow she was hiding. Sliding to the ground she pulled a small make-up mirror out of her pocked and angled it to watch around the building's corner.
Yolei and Sora hid in a small alley along the main street of Double City after they had sneaked through half of the ghostly town in search of their contact already, carefully avoiding wide, free spaces in an attempt to remain undetected along the way.
So far they hadn't been found, hopefully.
Glancing in her mirror Yolei caught a glimpse of the empty street she and Sora had to cross to search the other half of the city. The broad street was leading from the forest part of the city deep into the desert part, almost cutting the entire town in half in the process. The street clearly showed the extreme contrast that marked this to city as well; until a few buildings down the road small plants and weeds grew between rough stones covering the ground, but further away all life on the ground died, leaving a sandy foothold for all the Digimon that used to fill this street.
Considering that even after spending hours in the city they still hadn't found their contact, Yolei thought of this entire affair as more than just a bit suspicious. Their smell should have carried throughout every street already and alerted every being with a sensitive sense of smell of their presence. That no one had come to them or moved to a place easily found was not inspiring confidence in this mission.
Still, both girls agreed that retreating was not an option. Yet.
While they hadn't found anything friendly, nothing dangerous crossed their path yet either, after all.
Pocketing the small mirror Yolei gave a nod to Sora and hushed across the street with Hawkmon in her arms.
As she ran out of the protective shadow in the blazing sun a sudden chill made the hairs on her arms stand, a shiver run down her spine, a cold hand grasp for her heart and her knees weak.
Then it was over.
In a new shadow in a new alley Yolei sank to the ground, shaking, her breath flat.
She was sweating profoundly despite the cool temperature in the shadow and cold stone to her back. Silently she let Hawkmon leap from her arms; he not faring any better than her with his fathers standing on end much like a cat's.
She so dearly wanted to pass it of as her imagination, forget, get on with their work, chalk it up to her questionable health.
As Sora slumped down next to her looking much like Yolei felt, however, she knew she couldn't.
Not run from it, not hide, not forget, not stall, not ignore.
"We were seen," Yolei stated unnecessarily, her breath easily returning to normal, now that the sudden fright has passed.
She saw Sora nod from the corner of her eyes while she hugged her arms around her shaking form.
Once she had stopped her limps from moving unwanted it was easy to shake off the horror, fear and terror the sudden killing intent had inspired within her with an ease practiced and gained from her adventures. Unwillingly she noted just how much it had affected her in the first place to inform the others later.
If she survived.
Again.
Yolei hadn't been faced with such malicious blood lust since BelialVamdemon.
That was not an encouraging thought.
"We should retreat."
"Yeah."Yolei's unsaid 'we won't', was quite clear, because, seriously, if someone with strength -or at least lust for destruction- comparable to a crazy wanna-be tyrant was present there was no way they'd be able escape if the Digimon wanted them dead. Not with only the two of them.
"It still hasn't attacked us," Sora mentioned like it was rather unimportant; like the weather or something and Yolei felt respect for her senior bloom anew.
"Where is it anyway?" Yolei glanced around as if it could be standing just there with them.
"No idea. In the air, maybe? I only felt it watching us when we were uncovered on the street."
"Who was it?"
No answer, which Yolei interpreted as another blank, then Sora straightened, getting to her feet. "We should hurry. The faster we get what we came for, the sooner we can worry about getting away."
"Agreed." Yolei leaned against the wall as she rose from her knees.
She ignored Hawkmon's disapproving look, while it seemed like Pyiomon didn't keep her worries to herself. "Are you sure, Sora," the little bird asked, worried, "Izzy said we should get away when we have problems."
"Well, sadly it wouldn't be the first time his advices got misinterpreted."
They started carefully moving down the alley, looking through every window along the way and watching their surroundings with refined alert. Yolei never once let her eyes leave the blindingly bright blue sky for more than a second.
She may be used to life-threatening situations and she may be able to clean intimidating influence out of her system, but adrenaline was still coursing through her body like she had just escaped from an axe to the head.
Then again, maybe she had.
Creeping around a corner Yolei was still overly alert to her surroundings. She took in the patterns of stone on the floor and committed them to her memory, the rustling of leaves in the forest, the dry sound of sand brushing over hard ground and wind hollowing through deserted streets.
A peaceful contrast to all the other bloody and violent scenes she had memorized in an adrenalin ruled state. Perhaps she would dream of stoned mosaics now in her nightmares. It wouldn't be too bad, she decided.
That was if she ever got to dream again, mind you.
As she reached an corner leading to a narrow side way, a shallow movement in the alley caught her eye and her head snapped in its direction so fast she almost strained a muscle.
The side alley had green vines climbing pale grey walls of stone with thick leaves swaying in the wind, which made their shadows hush across the ground.
A sigh of relieve left her.
Hawkmon, walking at her feet still noticed her sudden movement and looked up alarmed, but Yolei simply shook her head and continued walking.
Passing the green plants Yolei forced her mind to focus even more on her task.
Because it wouldn't do to jump in fright at the smallest movement of a sand grain; it would over strain her nerves, make them fail her when she needed them most - which was most likely sooner than she wanted – , set her comrades on edge, inevitably pulling them down with her, and it would compromise her judgment.
If she was afraid, she'd turn and run even though it perhaps wasn't necessary.
If she was agitated, she wouldn't be able to find the best possible solution.
But that was exactly what was needed. The stakes were too high for anything else.
And Yolei hated it.
She hated to fight; be it for her survival or the entire world's.
She hated violence and spilling blood, the desperation and hate involved. She hated to see too much weight fall onto her friends' shoulders; a weight that increased with every battle fought, every live lost, every plea for help, every failure and every disappointment.
Still, she fought, her friends fought, because if they didn't others would or wouldn't. Others weren't as skilled as them, not as prepared, not as experienced, not as strong.
Simply not good enough to end everything as fast as possible with as little danger as allowed.
And if no one else would fight she'd have to fight anyway; be it only to protect her own life.
How ironic it all was in the end. Fighting to protect other people's innocence while she herself stamped all over her own. Fighting for peace while she herself would never be able to find any; not with with digital blood on her hands and dying lights of live imprinted into her memory.
But it was the only way. No matter how much she hated it.
Glancing down at Hawkmon Yolei also knew she'd never want to disappoint him. Her partner, who believed in her and who has waited eons just to simply meet her.
Her thoughts turned brighter. Because it is for him, she fights, and for her friends, who she doesn't want to burden with her duty and fate.
And again, she hated fighting.
It made so easy to forget where she came from and her she wanted to go and why she even walked.
"Yolei," Sora whispered, in an awfully quiet voice, "what is that?"
Not trusting her voice to remain quiet as quiet as Piyomon's as the little bird asked what her partner had seen, Yolei instead turned around, trying not to let emotional pressure influence her actions.
Sora, after she had gestured the Digimon to be quiet, stood pressed against the wall to glance through a window Yolei had just passed –damn her inattention- with great caution and Yolei followed her example by carefully throwing a quick look inside.
To her credit inside the rather rundown and simple room was nothing glaring obviously for attention. At least not as far as Yolei noticed.
Inside the room was what probably was one of many digital equivalents of a human table, build of the same grey stone the house was made of; a knee high deposit for all kinds of stuff. Glancing inside again Yolei identified something that was probably made of wood with a size of her head lying on the stony table. Next to it laid small sticks and different sized rods, some gleaming in metallic light.
In a corner to Yolei's right were big wooden cubes stacked until they almost reached the ceiling. On the wall opposite the window she was glimpsing through a plain cupboard was overflowing with half burned candles.
She realized she was looking into a workshop.
But while that was interesting it was not something to point out.
"I don't see anything," she whispered to the taller girl, confused.
Sora put a finger to her lips and waver the other fanatically. Yolei nodded, acknowledging; not that she had much more to say anyway.
Rising to her tiptoes Sora glanced inside, looking at something apparently directly below it. As soon as Yolei understood that, it was no longer a surprise that she had seen nothing when she had looked inside; Sora was taller and saw everything from a higher angle, so she could see things that were just barely hidden from her.
Reaching to the window's rim with her hands, Yolei pushed herself on her toes to catch a glimpse of what was so important.
First of all, i have to apologize. This chapter is not as long as the others.
The second part of this chapter was rather hard to write. To me, describing is the hardest part of writing and i often wonder if i gave enough details to create a picture or if i overloaded the description with unimportant, little things that no oner remembers anyway. And i can't allow the tension to drop during it either.
Other than that i hope i made understandable what happened to Takuya, Koichi and Tommy. If you didn't understand the explanation let me know so i can try to make it clear.
Please review again and thank you for last chapter's replies.
Finally i got one rather sad warning to give. I will not have any time during the second half of July and the first half of August so it might be possible that i won't manage to finish a chapter next month. But don't worry, in case i really can't make it, September's chapter will be extra long.