Chapter 38: Digital World: Dark Evolution IX

Efficiency.

Efficiency, Tommy reflected as he had to turn his eyes down and down and tilt his head some to catch sight of the water dozens of feet below him, was something he likely had always been partial to. From when he was a child up to now. Even in his earliest (relatively speaking) memories, he could pinpoint moments where he had done things with the simple purpose of being efficient; of taking the shortest and straightest path. Being a spoiled kid unable to do anything by himself was, if he thought about it, also a result of Tommy being efficient. After all, why bother doing things when he could have others do it for him with less effort?

A greasy thick strand of flesh and muscle was wrapped around his body almost from head to toe. The low, hoarse and scratching sound of the gigantic digimon drowned out the whooshing of sea and wind. Tommy felt the sound vibrate through the air and beat against his ears.

MarineDevimon, his memory supplied helpfully.

He had been misguided as a child, hadn't had a purpose to use that efficiency for. And since he hadn't had one, why not use it as he pleased? His childish mind hadn't seen the downside of having things easy, of making things easy. Too easy. Because Tommy had been very efficient at having things easy, he hadn't know how to act when he didn't have things easy. He hadn't know that that which was gained with little effort often had little worth. Hadn't understood that often the work put towards a goal was what gave worth to the goal in the first place.

Tommy grit his teeth, tensing his muscles and trying to move. All for nothing, as he couldn't even squirm. Frustrated, he let the coldness seep out from under his skin. He couldn't evolve, not in a situation like this where the battle was unpredictable. And where was Davis? He and Ex-Veemon had burst out of the water the last time what Tommy felt to be some time ago and he hadn't seen or heard of them since.

Were they all right?

Tommy didn't know and he couldn't to anything about it either so he dropped the worry from his mind with less effort than was right, and tried to think of ways of getting out of his situation.

Analysis: Captured, but not yet carried away, captured and in not able to act, but not unresisting.

There were many ways to work from that. Tommy just had to find them.

Back then, the digital world had cured Tommy quickly of the illusions he had had. If he hadn't pulled his own weight, the others would have paid for it. If he hadn't done his absolute best, which often still had not been enough, then he would have died. Not one of them would have survived if they hadn't known or learned to be efficient and practical. And just like that there had been a goal to work towards, there had been a reason to do his best, to be efficient for.

Curling his fists, Tommy once again tensed his muscles, straining against his restrains. His breath didn't cloud in the air being the coldest thing around, but whiteness crept up the black skin of MarineDevimon's tentacle. It didn't notice, too busy trashing its remaining limps into the water.

In a sharp exhale, Tommy blew his breath at the restricting limb, watching it freeze over to a reflecting, shimmering surface. But it still wasn't enough and the boy drew on the ice in his bones. It got colder still and while Tommy didn't feel the drop in temperature, he was suddenly uncomfortably aware of how the thick strand around him was living, breathing and warm flesh. It was too warm against his cool skin. But even as he thought this, the contact cooled and, as he focused on it, the skin changed from greasy contact on frozen skin to slippery surface.

Of course Tommy couldn't really put all his experiences and how he had changed from the months long fighting with the others into words. That was impossible. But what he could say confidently was that having repeatedly and frequently changed what he was, from the outside to the inside, had not done anything to make him less efficient. After all, efficiency had been one thing that all of his forms and minds had held on to. To different degrees maybe, but it had been something stable when very little had been. Like his voice, like his size, like his mind. Like his emotions.

Once more Tommy projected the ice of his body outside before he flexed his arms, relaxed his muscles in preparation and exhaled. He pushed the air out his body, made his lungs collapse in size, pulled his stomach in and with a sharp jerk twisted his arms into the vacated space against his belly. He pulled his shoulders in, changed the position of his legs and all of a sudden there was not enough pressure to hold him in the confines with the tentacle slippery and gravity working for him.

Tommy wished he were able to hate himself right now. Being efficient was not a state of mind he preferred, but it came the most easily to him. Chackmon was efficient, Blizzarmon was more so. Tommy had fused his biological data with Blizzarmon's. Beast Spirits were nothing if not efficient. They had nothing else to be but be efficient.

They were called Beast Spirits for a reason.

Right now, all Tommy could think, was efficient. Estimated, calculated if possible, for the best possible result. Anything that didn't aid in reaching that result was tossed aside with determined simplicity. That, more often than not, included (not-fueling) emotions. Like right now.

Tommy free fell dozens of feet through the air. His body was so cold that at contact with the water, it shock-froze. The ice caught part of his impact, building for greater resistance against the water. Its different density carried Tommy fast back to the surface.

He was not stupid enough to not realize that if he couldn't do something about the advantage the ocean provided MarineDevimon and the many Hangyomon with, he had lost.

But at the same time, there was nothing he could do about it. So long as he didn't know where Davis and Ex-Veemon were, he could not risk locking them beneath the surface.

Right now, in the back part of his mind that had not yet accepted his fate, how his life's decisions had been taken from him, he was horrified, screaming and repulsed. It was easily, what he felt was almost far too easily, ignored. Besides that, Tommy didn't feel much of anything. Tension was there of course, anger, frustration and his heart was thundering against his chest. But the worry, fear, horror, blind panic he should feel because Davis hadn't surfaced yet was absent. His rational mind was aware that he had lost his sense of time the moment this fight had started and for all he knew not even thirty seconds had passed, but at the same time his rational mind was also aware that minutes could have passed already. And Tommy didn't feel a bit towards that simply because there was absolutely nothing for him to do about it.

He should feel horrified about that, too.

In the most ironic ways, he felt like part of him had been frozen. But unlike anything else, Tommy couldn't make that ice bend to his will.

Tommy latched on to the fist part of MarineDevimon he could reach.

No place save? Simple; find one. If not, then make one.

No solid surface? Simple; make one. If not, improvise.

Big difference in body size? Simple; use it.

Ice was, in fact, very good at making things stick together -under the right circumstances. Tommy was Ice, thus he didn't have to bother about the circumstances. He could climb up MarineDevimon's body without any aid whatsoever, a fact he used. Big bodies usually didn't have a lot of sensitive skin, dark-type digimon, who relied on power more than anything even more so. Chances were that it didn't even notice Tommy climbing up it's skin and leaving a frozen trail in his wake until the Hangyomon started firing their harpoons at Tommy.

Hangyomon, despite what they looked like where of a pretty high evolution. The same, in fact, as MarineDevimon, so an attack from them had a lot of impact.

MarineDevimon tumbled, its tentacles whipping around. Aimed at the water.

Statisfied, Tommy climbed higher.

Controlled digimon were stupid. They were unable to think for themselves, unable to connect the easiest facts. Puppets.

Just now, Tommy had turned them against each other, attacking each other without them ever even considering they might not be attacking an enemy. Puppet digimon, especially en masses, were literally programmed; simply at that.

It was an opening that was not smart to give, but then again, Tommy didn't think their adversary was overly intelligent. Well prepared, yes, intelligent, no.

Tommy didn't lie, especially not to himself. It wasn't in his nature. At all. He couldn't, in fact, lie. He didn't think that was a bad characteristic. Virtue-wise. Lying was bad after all. Because of who Tommy was, though, the lack of lying skill was a disadvantage. The rational and analytical mindset that he had not been without in a long time knew the use of lies and misinformation. Also, not lying meant not being able to bluff. Sometimes a good bluff was all that made the difference between victory and defeat, life and death. Tommy wanted to live. Had to live; he had not been chosen to die after all. Not being able to lie meant that he could protect no-one from ugly and hurtful truths. Or so he had thought at first. As it turned out, the omitting of information wasn't lying. Neither was letting others come to their own conclusions. Like Davis.

Without evolving, Tommy lacked power and agility, often a fatal problem against enemies as strong as the ones attacking, but there was something. His mobility mostly unhindered, Tommy scaled MarineDevimon, freezing himself hand and footholds till he reached the beings wide shoulders. Carefully, Tommy held on to the agitated digimon's skin as he moved forward, his sight narrowing in on the thick neck. Digimon anatomy was different from human's, sometimes a lot, sometimes not, but without a doubt they mostly shared the fact that living without a head was not possible. Tommy was in no position to remove it, but he was in a position to do something similar, cruel as it was. Placing his hands against the softest piece of flesh, he began by calling forth the frost of his core to his hands and through his hands into the living being.

Tommy knew he should probably feel bad about what he had made the elder -or was he?- boy think, but...But he couldn't. Davis was an easy person to read and understand. It wasn't hard for Tommy, with Blizzarmon's millennia of wisdom to draw from, to have calmed Davis into a useful state of mind. He wished he felt bad about that. But feeling bad about something that needed to be done to be efficient wasn't efficient.

Little ice stars at first, the cold manifested quickly into a solid covering, ever growing in size and, most importantly, in depth. MarineDevimon's natural body heat worked against Tommy and even as a part of him was glad for it, he knew it wouldn't be an issue. Not for much longer. Puppet as it was, MarineDevimon's survival instincts still worked and Tommy had to freeze his hands and feet on to get get thrown of as the digimon lashed out more fiercely in attack of an enemy that stuck like a parasite to its body.

Tommy watched waves part from the impact of its tentacles, saw the shadows of the Hangyomon move around more, their instincts working as well.

Davis was a good person. He only wanted Tommy's best. And that was touching. It was that, though, that made it impossible for Tommy and his friends to tell the others the full truth, to be honest. Not if they still wanted to work together. Not if they wanted this still naïve team, to keep their innocence. Not if they wanted them to be useful. Davis felt responsible for Tommy. Everyone of them felt responsible for Tommy, for his safety. For them Tommy was just one more person to be protected. That protecting, that succeeding in protecting was most important to them. It was their duty and why they did what they did. They fought to protect. To protect lives and hearts. Failure to do so hurt them. Their hearts and spirits.

And Tommy couldn't allow that. For so many reasons.

All more or less linked to efficiency.

Efficient towards multiple aims.

Tommy increased the focus against his hands and soon MarineDevimon's struggles gained a desperate edge, one tinted by slowing movements and cries of looming death. High, vibrating through the body. It was a slow death that Tommy summoned, but it was the only one he could cause.

So he had to deceive Davis as well as he could. Because Tommy's best and his safety was not a priority. Because there was nothing Davis could to protect Tommy. The damage was already done, honestly, if one wanted to call it damage. And from the very beginning 'safety' and 'best' had different meanings for their two groups.

Idealistic, naïve and innocent, but good as the other group was, Tommy didn't think they were open minded enough to tolerate what warriors were like. He didn't want a conflict over that. He didn't want to deal with getting other views pushed in his face with an effort that was better invested somewhere else. Especially not at the cost of moral and efficiency. It was war after all.

MarineDevimon sagged, swayed and fell over into the water. It drifted at the surface, not dead yet, not busting into data yet. Tommy would be lying if that hadn't been an effect he had anticipated. A slow death -or not, if the water temperature was kind. The body of MarineDevimon provided enough surface for Tommy to move, it was also large enough to force the Hangyomon to climb it if they wanted to get to Tommy. And they would come to face him on land, not being given the choice not to. Forcing water-types on land, Tommy had evened the scales some. Now he was only outnumbered and outgunned.

As Tommy used to be, he would have chosen to defend his spirited opinion rather than avoid stating it in the first place. He didn't like fighting -verbal or physical-, but he had been passionate about his sense of right and wrong and his sense of justice. The last two still held, luckily, even if he was more rational about it than passionate. Even if he saw more of a bigger picture now.

And that was exactly what he had not told Davis. Completely. Honestly, he wasn't sure if or how much he was still Tommy; the boy with a brother and parents and for his own sake Davis couldn't know that and so Tommy had tried to -and succeeded- in explaining the mental change of evolution away. He had compared it to masks and that wasn't wrong, except that he had not mentioned that wearing too many masks too long made the original person behind them disappear. If an evolution was only skin deep it was not much of an evolution at all and had little purpose.

Tommy crouched at the roots of one of MarineDevimon's tentacles, keeping a sharp eye out at his surroundings. How much time had passed? What was with Davis? Where would the Hangyomon come from? The latter was easily answered as he sensed them climbing on all around him, their wet skin making splattering sounds at they moved on land. With one more glance at the sea, Tommy once more put all thoughts of Davis from his mind. There was still nothing he could do. Nothing beyond keeping pursuers away.

In the digital world only things happened with purpose.

The two only things that didn't change at all with evolution were his nature and memories. (Though the latter was a bit shaky at the moment; as Blizzarmon it was easier to remember what it was like being Blizzarmon. Tommy's memories tended to be a bit blurry then. But it was getting better.)

For that he had played into Davis' good heart and used it. Like it was just another pawn.

Tommy really wished he were able to hate himself right now.

As much as he could, Tommy called on the part of his mind that overlapped and intertwined most with his. Once upon a time, what he did now would have caused evolution, but sadly it wasn't that easy or that quick anymore. What he was like as Blizzarmon completely took him over. Stilling Tommy's eyes flicked from one Hangyomon to the next, counting and anticipating, calculating, but mostly trusting his instincts. His hands twitched for axes, a huffed breath was pushed from his nose, his crouch shifted to a more feral position. They'd see him the moment he left his spot, they'd attack and if Tommy fought, they'd overwhelm him. But it wasn't like he was given a choice either.

Tommy shot from his cover, attacking the first one. It was the most removed from the group. His hands lounging for the other digimon's neck, he heard hissing behind him, but all he focused on was avoiding his target's harpoon, locking the hand holding it and attacking. His first grab was avoided, but Tommy was already too far inside Hangymon's guard and land-clumsy (if strong) limps to be stopped. He jerked his knee upwards with all his power and momentum, and weak as he was as a human, it made the diver digimon double over croaking. Something sharp and fast pierced the air with a whistling sound. Shifting his center of gravity, Tommy let himself drop, only just in time. Sharp stinging in his shoulder and metallic smell was all the young teenager needed to know as he rolled to the side, hearing more weapons flying. They all missed Tommy, but Hangyomon was pierced by its allies weapons and busted into data.

Tommy swallowed.. Against armed enemies it was important to know the weapon's range. Harpoons or lances were difficult to overcome to force close combat and now the other digimon had used their weapons and given Tommy that opening. The boy sprung forward.

The world shook.

Losing his footing, Tommy almost crashed into even an even worse unbalanced Hangyomon. On instinct to the closeness, Tommy crushed a fist into its face, only then he had space, mentally and physically, to wonder.

His jaw dropped and he gaped at the digimon racing through the air at high speed as his memory supplied him with the answer despite the fact that Tommy had never quite seen this kind before. AeroV-dramon. Ultimate evolution. Especially fast. Rare digimon.

A half forgotten, ancient feeling memory flashed before his eyes and a wave of nostalgia overcame the holder of the Spirits of Ice as he watched. A fond smile tugged the boy's lips, emotionally stirred from the depth of his being in what felt like a long, long time or maybe the first time.

Tommy watched and the moment cost him. Another wave of harpoons was thrown at him. It was only instinct that made him twist out of the main wave, but one still sliced into his leg, another into his hip. For an eternal instant, a mass of impulses conflicted in him, an echo of the three beings that made him. Fear and shock, the impulse to cry out; shock and anger, the impulse to defend; anger and aggression, the impulse to destroy.

Tommy felt like his brain melted in his head when the split second passed and the breath was knocked out of him. Only then the pain registered, shaking him enough to make Tommy focus.

Focus enough to pull the stuck weapon in his side out, focus enough to have the presence of mind to put distance between him and his enemies in whatever way possible. Half crawling, half rolling, it hurt, but pain was low on Tommy's list of concerns. Instead, distant recollections and experience, prodding him, he listened; for the whistle of cut air, the humming of heated energy, raising air pressure.

"V- Wing Blade!"

Again, even though it was the last thing he should be doing, even though it was no move of efficiency, he felt like smiling. It felt good to smile. Even now.

AeroV-dramon were familiar. Homey. Even though they were not of Ice. Even though the place he had seen and fought with most of them had been blood-soaked battlefields. Even though he recalled nothing but flashes and emotions. Propping himself up to his arms, Tommy already knew what sight would meet his eyes.

Deep cuts into flesh, toppled over bodies. A bit unexpected, not one of the Hangyomon was dead and even as he thought this, he realized that he should not be surprised at all to see no death as this was the present.

And he didn't mind that.

AeroV-dramon circled around and landed elegantly.

Despite where and how he was, Tommy found a moment at peace.

He didn't mind the present.

Some of the subconscious barriers inside him melted.

Davis looked shaky on his feet as he slid from his partner's back, Tommy saw as he tried to struggle to his own feet. It wasn't a good idea, the host figured, when blood soaked into his clothes and standing was a thing that was far more difficult than it had ever been. However Tommy had his pride, his priorities and also new limits to test so he ignored it as best as he could. Functioning was important. Not one of the three beings he was had ever cared for weakness.

"Tommy!"

Tommy grinned with effort past his expression of pain. "I'm fine," he said, sounding weaker than he felt. "Just flesh wounds."

Throwing one dubious glance up and down Tommy's body, Davis made a dubious sound at the back of his throat. "Right. Anyway, lets get away first. AeroV-dramon says he is fast." He swung one of Tommy's arms around his shoulders, helping him walk.

Tommy ran his eyes over the small dragon is question, who was very busy inspecting his own body with excitement. "I bet. AeroV-dramon are pretty strong for perfect evolutions. And pretty fast, too."

Davis blinked. "You are familiar with them?"

Well, in a manner of speaking..."Yeah," he said, and suppressing more than a winch by biting down on his lips as he tired climbing on. That he was still able to move might not mean much if it hurt too much to do so fluidly in a fight. Not good. "It's been a long time, though. In our world AeroV-dramon have died out. There were a lot of them, though during our civil war." So long in fact, that Tommy didn't remeber them any more. Knowing stuff was different from remembering. Flashes were different from remembering.

It simply was too long ago.

"I haven't seen one before," Davis admitted, patting his partner's snout tiredly. He broke out into a wide grin. "But AeroV-dramon looks really cool."

The digimon in question puffed with pride. "Don't I? I feel like I could take on the world! And maybe your mom's food."

In this chapter for April I hope I made it clear what Tommy's state of mind is like. I'm aware it probably is a bit confusing, but that is by design. Unlike Takuya, Tommy hadn't yet had the chance or reached a state where it was possible to unify his personalities. It can make him jumbled and messed up. Like here.

Do you have questions? Suggestions or critique or complains? Please tell me in a review.