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Chapter six: A Side Effect of Dying.

Olivia woke early the next morning. She had set two alarms and even wrote herself a little note reminding herself of what she needed to do. Her memory had not nearly become bad enough for this measure yet, but she felt paranoid that she was going to forget something. Something important.

She dragged herself from her bed and brushed the sleep from her eyes. In the other room she heard her son stir gently from his sleep and yawn peacefully. Everything appeared so normal. The way she felt. The way her home looked in the early light of the morning. The gentle scent of baby powder in the air and how the monitor by her bedside glowed slightly every time Noah made a noise. Despite all this, nothing was ever going to be normal again, and slowly she would forget mornings like this. Mornings that had become so important. Most mothers fear not meeting their grandchildren or walking their child down the isle on their wedding day. Olivia feared that she would not even remember her sons first day of school and this thought terrified her.

Regardless of this, she knew that whilst she still could she needed to carry on. Already she had made her mind up about telling the guys about her prognosis today. She had decided to only tell Amanda, Fin, and Carisi. Nick already knew and she wanted to keep it quiet from the people at the top for as long as she could. Her job was nearly as important to her as Noah was and she intended on keeping it that way for as long as she could. As she left for work she kissed Noah softly on the head. As much as she wanted to keep fighting for the victims she knew that she was going to have to cut down her hours so she could spend more time with her son, but she was actually looking forward to that.

As she pulled up to work she stared up at the building and frowned. Something wasn't quite right and her vision was a little blurry. For the past few days she had fallen ill to headaches and had put it down to stress. She did the same now. Headaches and blurred vision were not a side affect of early onset Alzheimer's and she wasn't on medication yet. So she simply put it down to a side effect of dying. Worrying.

Walking out into the squad room she took a long slurp of the coffee she had picked up on the way to work. Nick noticed her as she walked in and smiled in her direction. She smiled back, regardless of how she thought his smile had been given out of pity. Nick appeared relieved when she returned his gesture and spoke to her.

"Morning sarge. We got the guy for the assault of those teen girls on the subway. Do you wanna help interview?" He asked.

Olivia looked at him and nodded before signalling at him to give her five minutes to sort her stuff out. She walked into her office and sighed as she settled her things down on the desk. It was only 9 am and it had already been a long day. Slowly she dragged a hand through her hair before turning and entering the interview room where Nick was already set up...

xxxxx

The interrogation had been a waste of time. The guy was a real creep who seemed to think any female of any age were his for the taking, and after a few failed flirting attempts aimed at Olivia he had asked for a lawyer. She had told him what he was being charged with and he stood up as Nick cuffed him, clearly eyeing Olivia. She looked away as she always did with these 'types' in order to calm herself before looking back. When she did she grabbed his upper arm on the left and Nick did the same to his right. Together they walked him out towards the cell. Olivia's head hurt more with each step and she felt nauseous, but she somehow managed to keep her composure. At least for the moment.

Suddenly, the guy they were arresting pulled from Nicks grip. He spun around and faced Olivia. He was cuffed but he gripped her tightly by the wrists with his cold hands. For a moment Olivia froze and stared into his dark, emotionless eyes. Eventually she pulled against him to get away. Within seconds he was tore from her, but not before turning her stomach with his sick comments.

"I like someone with a bit of fight, but you could never believe the things I could make you do..." The creep sneered.

All of sudden it was as if she was no longer in the room anymore. Her body shook and she could hear sick twisted laughter. She was panicked and her chest felt tight. Nick stepped into her vision but he was blurred and she couldn't understand what he was saying. In an attempt to calm her, he placed his hands gently on her upper arms. She flinched away from him. Suddenly Nicks kind, caring face turned into a monster. A monster she had seen before. A monster that plagued her nightmares.

"Lewis." She whispered as her voice shook.

Nick stopped for a moment as if registering what was going on. Fin, who had noticed what was happening ran up and pulled him away from her. He could see the panic in her eyes.

"Please don't hurt me... Not again." She whispered as Nick's touch left her.

The whole squad room was in silence. Fin lent towards her but was careful not to touch her. She was tensed and sweating, but this wasn't PTSD and he knew it. It was as if Olivia was actually seeing the beast again.

"Olivia its Fin." He said softly. "Lewis is dead remember? Your safe and he's gone. You're okay. Just breath and feel both your feet on the ground."

At those words it was like Olivia was present again. Her head whipped round and her eyes were glossy with tears, but she was back. She had heard those words before from Fin. Not long after Sealview he had said almost the same thing as she held a gun to the back of a perps head. It had worked then and it worked now. She took a deep breath but didn't say anything in fear of her voice failing her. She looked around at the silenced room and she took in Nick's shocked face. She knew he wasn't shocked about what had just happened. He was shocked that it was happening now. It was too early. To early to have delusions...

So what d'yall think? Is everything as it seems? Please drop me a review... They're much appreciated!