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Chapter 26 – 110 Percent.

Tori's POV.

The corridor of the courthouse, looked a straight out of Law and Order. As I sit on the bench, watching Jade pace back and forth in front of me, I keep expecting to see Sam Waterston's, Jack McCoy come around the corner.

"Jade sit down, you're going to wear a grove in the floor if you keep pacing like that. Why don't you write in your journal?"

Other than a grunt, Jade ignored me and just kept pacing. I then looked down at her open journal next to me, which she had started to write, but stopped.

Journal of Jade's Haunted head.

Day 78

I hate fucking waiting…I hate it, I hate it , I hate it….almost as much as I hate him….

That's where Jade stopped and started to pace, some 2 hours ago.

Jade stopped pacing momentarily. "How long has it been Tori?"

I glanced at my phone, "2 hours and 13 minutes. Exactly 6 minutes after you asked me the last time."

With a dissatisfied huff, Jade resumed pacing.

If you're wondering why Jade is pacing, it's because we are waiting for the verdict in Beck's trial. The jury has been out for 2 hours and 13 minutes.

A lot has happened since that evening where we went out to eat at that Italian restaurant some 45 days ago. After that dinner in which a lot was said, I retreated back into my shell and sort of stayed there. It was comfortable in my shell. Jade however, worked as diligently as ever on her recovery.

We talked a bit more than we did before, but not all that much.

A few weeks later, something happened.

Flashback

It the day of the start of Beck's trial and opening arguments were scheduled to be heard. Jade had gotten up before me and was out of the shower before I even got up. I knew that was up early because she was planning on attending the trial.

I had come out of the bedroom, dressed for work and was about to head to the kitchen to eat breakfast when I saw Jade.

She was sitting on the couch, dressed in a woman's business suit, staring straight ahead. She looked visibly scared.

I sensed something was wrong and walked over. "What's wrong?"

"I'm scared. I'm scared to go. I have to face him. If I don't go, I'll move backwards. The D.A. said I don't have to attend if I really don't want to. But I have to go. I can't go backwards, ever." Said the Goth with a quivering voice.

It was then, that moment, watching a utterly terrified Jade gathering the courage to leave, that something hit me.

That Jade is giving every ounce of herself into making herself better and even more than that, confronting Beck when she didn't have too. I knew that before but seeing the anguish in her eyes, really hit home.

On the flip side, I also realized, that while Jade was giving 110% percent, I wasn't. I was barely helping myself let alone Jade. Sure I cooked, cleaned and let her stay, but that was nothing. Here Jade is going to court and did I even consider taking the day off to go with her as support. No, I didn't. Actually, it never occurred to me.

As I was standing there, half in shock from my realization, Jade got up and mumbled. "See you later."

Before I knew it she was gone.

I found myself unable to move, just thinking about how little support I've really given her. Oh sure, I got mad when she wasn't doing anything, but instead of really helping her, I just got pushy. In fact it was Barbie, who came the next morning, that picked up the pieces of my mess.

The more I thought of it, the more I realized, I've been a self-centered jerk. Look at Jade, she's been beaten and raped, more times than I care to think about and she's pulling herself together. Me, I've had some back luck sure, but I haven't been through anything nearly as bad, why am I the one that's now emotionally crippled.

It had been there the entire time, right in front of me and I never saw it. At least until I saw Jade on the couch, gathering up the courage to face her rapist.

Suddenly feeling weak in the knees, I sat down on the couch and just started to cry. I didn't make it to work that day, after crying my eyes out for almost half an hour as to how horrible I've been, I called in sick and hurried down to the courthouse.

She needed my support, perhaps I was going a bit to far the other way, but I was needed.

I finally arrived and caught Jade outside the courtroom. She was waiting for trial to start and hadn't entered yet. At this point, while I was no longer crying, I was still rather upset.

Seeing me coming up, a puzzled look appeared on her face. "Aren't you supposed to be at work? And why do you look like you've been crying."

"Jade I've been horrible. You've been through all this terrible stuff, much worse than I've ever been through and I'm the basket case and not you. I've been a terrible friend and emotionally distant when I didn't need too. You've put so much into your recovery, it literally shames me for what little I've done for me or you. All I've done is hide in my shell like a total coward. I just saw you sitting on the couch, all scared but determined to go and then it hit me. Who am I to be hide in this emotionless shell and hid…"

"Tori calm down. Calm down. You're rambling, but I think I know what you're saying. You don't have to apologize."

"Jade I…

Again Jade quickly cut me off. "No. Stop, there's been too many apologies already. We need to stop letting the past hold us back. I'm not going to blame or judge you. I'm hardly in any position to do so. But if it will make you feel better, I forgive you. But stop with the self-loathing. It's an emotional trap. They say that in group all the time."

Just having her forgive me, made me feel measurably better. "Can I join you? I know you're scared and I thought I could be there for you."

Jade nodded. "I'd like that, but let's fix your makeup first, we have about 20 minutes before they start. We both need to look confident and strong, having half ruined makeup will kind of make that a lot harder."

"Thank you Jade. I really want to help you any way I can."

"Let's help each other."

In nature it takes years and years for an Ice age to end. In our case, it ended rather abruptly. Jade took me in the bathroom, of course I took pains not to touch her. She's still afraid of being touched. There I fixed my make up and we went into the courtroom, where we sat in the back.

Beck was there in a rather dull looking grey suit and neatly cut hair. He didn't look at us, however. His lawyer was a rather obese middle aged man who looked like he was a prime candidate for a heart attack.

I was nervous and though she didn't show it, I knew Jade was. The judge entered and it was then did Beck look back at us. His expression was neutral, almost innocent. I guess he figured shooting us a harsh glare might affect the jury's opinion of him They happened to be sitting only a few feet away..

Letting my emotions take over, I just gave him a hateful glare. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see Jade. She was giving him a cold, emotionless stare.

After about 2 seconds of us starring at him, he nervously turned away. He didn't look back after that.

After that things changed dramatically. I had to work at it, but I took Jade's example and put 110% of my effort into getting out of my shell and helping Jade whenever possible.

We started to talk, cook together, watch TV together and quickly started to rebuild our friendship. Though we avoided any talk of dating as I think we both thought we weren't ready.

I even started to join her at the health club.

Through the experience of the trial, we've been doing some serious bonding and while Jade and I have a ways to go, much progress has been made.

The trial continued and Beck's attorney who, actually wasn't that bad, tried to convince the jury that everything was consensual and no actual rape occurred. While I couldn't attend every day of the trial, I kept in close contact with Jade, giving her encouragement.

Finally we had to testify, both of us were there that day. Jade went first and never have I been prouder. She went on the stand and calmly described how Beck had abused, raped and mistreated her for years, never once wavering in her testimony. That day she manged to stare down Beck again, who avoided looking at her. Jade even stood up to the defense attorney's arguments of it was all just a bizzare sex game and shut him down.

I went up right after that and from the back Jade silently mouthed. "You can do it."

Like Jade, is stood up and told my story and like Jade, didn't let the defense attorney throw me off.

The best part was watching the jury's disgusted faces when they heard the playback of the tape I made. His attorney tried to argue that it wasn't what it seemed, but appeared not to have much luck.

End flashback.

Now the trial is over and just a few hours ago, the case went to the jury. Even though things went well at the trial Jade is extremely nervous. I can't blame her.

I'm jarred out of my thoughts by one of the prosecutors who's just popped his head out of the door.

"Ladies' the jury has a verdict."

Jade looked at me and nervously bit her lip. "They only deliberated just over 2 hours, is that good, is that bad?"

"Jade calm down and let's go in an find out. I'm with you."

We entered the courtroom and sat down, Jade now was so nervous she could no longer hid it. She kept shifting in her seat and fidgeted with her hands.

"Try and calm down Jade", I whispered as we waited for the jury to reenter the court room.

Looking down at her hands, I wanted to hold them. Not out of any romantic aim, just to calm her down and let her know I was there for her.

It was then I noticed that Jade was starring down at my hands, with increasing, anxious expression.

"Jade?"

"Plea….pleas….pleas….ho…hold my hand. I ne….need to feel saf…safe…"

Jade was so nervous about letting me me touch her that she actually studdered when she asked me to hold her hand. How hard it must have been for her to do that. Again 110%

Every so slowly and carefully I took her hand into mine. She quickly tensed up as I did, so I held them as gently as I could.

"Thank you Tori." Said Jade, sounding like she was on the verge of tears.

"You're welcome Jade."

The jury entered and I did the best to read their faces, but I could determine nothing.

The judge then looked to the jury. "Have you reached a verdict?"

The Forman who looked to be a stuffy business executive type, nodded. "Yes your honor, we have."

"Than what is your verdict."

It was then that Jade squeezed my hand. I felt honored that she finally felt strong enough to let me hold her hand.

I squeezed her hand back and gave her a quick smile.

We then turned to the jury forman who read the verdict.

"We the jury find the defendant, Beckett Oliver, Guilty on all charges."

Hearing the world guilty, lifted what felt like a 20 pound weight off my shoulders. I had finally gotten him.

I looked to Jade who had started to cry.

Before I knew it, Jade spontaneously threw her arms around me. "I'm free Tori…I'm free…..Thank you…."

I think Jade had realized that she had gotten way out of her comfort zone, as she somewhat awkwardly let me go. Still tears of joy ran down her face.

"You did it Jade, you beat him….You took everything he threw at you and survived. he can never touch you again."

"Thank you Tori….Thank you. I know we've been through a lot, but you're the only one who cared. You're a true friend. Thank you."

Hearing that, I realized I could finally forgive myself for 3 years go. The rest of the weight on my shoulders, vanished in an instant and for the first time in years, I smiled a true smile.

I moved things forward a bit, they are friends now but, still not up to the point of dating yet.

More story to come as Tori and jade grow closer. Don't forget, we still don't know what jade's project is and Barbie will show up again.