Dearest Father,

Well, here we are again. Sebastian is avoiding me. I went to the Chantry to see if he wanted to take a walk along the Wounded Coast, but one of the Sisters said he was out doing missionary work today. I know my thoughts have been on that near kiss from the other day, and I imagine his thoughts linger there as well. At least I hope so.

But I wasn't going to let myself sit in and be moody over it any longer. Two days was enough, waiting, hoping he'd stop by, apologize for running off. Two days of Bodahn asking me if I was going out, or Sandal's constant excitement over enchantments not helping my mood. So I started cleaning out my chest, trying to at least be productive in my misery, and found a good reason to get out of the house.

"Hawke? What brings you here?"

The excitement in her voice caused a small bit of guilt to stir within Hawke. "I know it's been a while, I'm sorry Merrill," she said to the elf as she entered the small home in the alienage. "I was hoping to make it up to you, maybe go out for the day and get some sunshine?"

The wide grin on the elf's face was priceless. "Oh I'd love that, I really would. Where are we going?"

Hawke shrugged. "I thought maybe the Wounded Coast? Drag Isabela and Varric out as well? It really is a beautiful day outside, and none of us should be cooped up."

Merrill agreed. "It is lovely this time of year. The trees and flowers are in full bloom, and the birds, they never stop singing!"

"No, they don't," Hawke said with a laugh. "They wake me up bright an early each morning."

"So can we go now?" Merrill asked, with as much enthusiasm as a child ready to explore the world.

"Almost," Hawke said as she pulled her pack from her back. "I have something to give you first." Retrieving the wooden halla from her bag, she handed the sculpture to Merrill.

She accepted the gift, her eyes shining with emotion. "You must have found this at the Dalish camp. I bet it's Master Ilen's work. But what's the occasion?"

"No occasion Merrill," Hawke said. I just thought you'd like it, a reminder of home and your people."

Merrill set the statue on her table and stared at it. "No one has ever given me a present before," she said, a hint of sadness in her voice. "Not something that didn't have some purpose, or that I had need for. It's just so... unexpected. Thank you Hawke, I mean it."

I felt horrible, Father. I avoid her so often because I know she is a blood mage, the very thing you have warned me against time and time again. When I do take her along, and we come into any confrontation, I feel her tapping into that part of her, and I feel ill. A dark, overwhelming sensation overcomes me, and I feel as if I stand too close, I'm in danger of some demon wishing for another mage to feast upon.

But the shy, innocence of her, almost makes me think of Bethany. Very sweet, trying to see the best in people and the world around her, even when her own people turn her away. Could be another reason I avoid her, the feel of magic beside me and the dark hair. If I close my eyes, my sister is with me.

"So, about that nice quiet stroll along the coast?" Varric said sarcastically as they heard someone cursing and giving orders from just below the cliffs.

Hawke shrugged. "Can't hurt to check it out," she said, watching Merrill nervously adjust her staff.

They ran down to the large rock formation to find a few of Kirkwall's guards huddled in fear, as the woman who appeared to be in charge barked her orders. Before they were able to reach the pinned down crew, an arrow came shooting through the air and took out one of the guards.

Hawke and her companions knelt beside the other guards, and the woman began speaking frantically. "You're the bloody reinforcements? Just four of you? I thought the captain would send more!"

"We are not reinforcements, but can help," Hawke said. "What are you doing out here? What are we up against?"

"My first routine assignment," the woman, who introduced herself as Lieutenant Harley, stated. "This is all that is left of my patrol. Unfortunately we are up against Evets' Marauders, and they've already killed six of my men."

Isabela perked up at the mention of Evets. "Oh I've been waiting to get my hands on Evets. We're going to help, right? I have a special poison for that man."

"He isn't among them," Harley informed her. "But his second in command, Fell Orden, is here. A nasty blood mage known for robbing and raping innocent victims that happen to come near their camps. Me and my men haven't been able to get close enough though, the area is full of traps."

Varric looked up expectantly at Hawke. "Traps you say?"

"Two rogues I say," Hawke said with a wink. "Rally your men lieutenant, it's time to rid the coast of this man for good."

And so my plan for a nice, peaceful day along the coast didn't work out as planned. After a heated battle with the bandits, and a few extra minutes disarming the vast amount of traps along the coast so no one would get hurt, it was back to Kirkwall for us. Merrill was excited to have seen some action today, though taking down another blood mage soured her mood a bit.

I'm wondering if it's starting to sink in that maybe blood magic isn't such a good idea? Every time we face a blood mage, disaster follows. Is it only a matter of time before Merrill brings that down upon us? It is certainly dangerous to keep her around, but I almost feel if I didn't, she'd be getting herself into more trouble.

No sign of Sebastian this evening. I'm sure the sisters at the Chantry told him I had come looking for him. I don't know why I expected him to be here when I got home. It was silly to wish for such a thing. I'll give him his space, but not for too long. He didn't want me avoiding him, I won't allow him to do the same.