Chapter 34
"The panel behind King Candy is the real King Candy's code. His." Gretel gestured to the hologram.
"But how?" Minty asked. "I don't even know there was a 'real' King Candy." She made air quotes over the word "real."
There wasth a King Candy, Minty, the monarch began to explain. You all forgot becausthe of Turbo, but before Turbo, I wasth a racer in Sthugar Rush. One of the besth racersth next to my vanilla bean.
"You mean Vanellope," said Adorabeezle. "And why in hell do you think she would believe your sack of garbage?"
She needsth to. I know that sthomewhere buried in her code she remembersth, Candy said. Asth do you three.
"Right," Citrusella scoffed. "You're just trying to keep us from kicking your ass right here."
"Wait, Cit." Adorabeezle stopped the recolor before she could move further, then turned to the king. "If you claim that you're the 'real' King Candy, then who's the one out there? And how did you come back to life if you are who you say you are?"
For the sthecond question, I don't know, replied King Candy with a shake of his head. I only woke up here suddenly. Something probably happened here recently for me to come back.
"Well, we know that we're got an upgrade recently," said Adorabeezle. "Wait a minute, could the upgrade have brought you back? Like, erased Turbo's work and restoring your data as if nothing happened?"
"I wouldn't know all of that."
"Yeah, we wouldn't," Gretel agreed. "Heck, I didn't even think of that. I'm not a whiz at codes and info and stuff."
"Maybe we can ask Surge?" joked Minty. "Or Litwak?"
"Surge may guard our games, but he's not a god, and do you seriously think we can get out of the screen and ask Litwak?" Citrusella shot her a "Really?" look.
"Okay, those were not the best suggestions. How are we going to know for sure how King Candy came back if a lot of people, okay, everybody's unaware of his return, how's that going to help us?"
"I think we should ponder the first question for now," said Adorabeezle. "Who's the King Candy bossing us around the castle?"
"I saw a woman in here earlier," Gretel began. "She took over King Candy's avatar and placed that nasty virus in Sugar Rush."
"A woman?" Minty repeated.
Gretel nodded. "But King Candy can't tell us her name because of something in his code. Seriously, it actually prevents him from saying her name."
"Can I see?" Adorabeezle neared Candy's panel.
Go ahead. The hologram moved aside, allowing the popsicle racer to open the monarch's code, where she found a red panel flashing erratically unlike the purple panels. The red panel contained the Japanese characters. "Whose panel is this?"
"I can't read Japanese, so I was wondering if you guys could," Gretel said.
"We're a Japanese game, but we're limited to just saying 'Sugar Rush' in the language." Citrusella cocked her head. "And apparently our friend's from a Japanese game, too."
"Maybe if we can get this to Surge, he'll know something." Adorabeezle tried to pull out the odd panel, but it wouldn't budge. "What the hell?" She tried again, but the red panel remained in its position.
"Move over." Minty shoved her aside, trying her hand at removing the foreign panel, but no luck. "What the hell is this? Now I've done my share of moving patches around to gain an advantage in races with no problem."
"That was you that time?" Citrusella growled. "No wonder why my kart kept fishtailing during our Christmas vacation. I swear, once we catch this bitch, you're next, Minty!"
Firsth, how are we going to remove thisth virusth? King Candy interjected.
"And the one in the middle of the game," added Gretel, leading the trio to a larger version of the red panel, same Japanese characters embroidered across. Wires from every other panel were connected to it, sending its energy to the panel.
"We didn't see this one," Minty said, staring up at the malware.
"And we're also wondering why Vanellope isn't infected," the siren said, swimming over to the president's panel not far from the virus. It was connected to the malware like the others, but when Citrusella opened the panel, none of the stats and add-ons were infected.
"Why is that?" Adorabeezle wondered. "Is Pres. that special?"
"Look at this." Minty pointed at a blue panel floating among the purple ones.
Adorabeezle, Gretel, and Citrusella focused their attention on the blue panel, which had a strange box with a lightning bolt embroidered.
"That wasn't there before the upgrade," said Adorabeezle. "I've poked in here several times, and nothing like that was even in Vanellope's code."
"Whatever this is, guys..." Citrusella studied the patch. "It can mean some serious shit for Pres."
…
"Here we are." Don Pianta led the group to the Super Mario Bros. code room, with Snow, her allies, and the prisoners behind him. It had not been a problem for Mario to torch all of the cells, and the way to the code room in the basement of the castle, specifically in the Metal Cap Cavern's waterfall, had not consisted of a lot of Cy-Bugs or other enemies that would give the crew grief. Some of the Snifits and Monty Moles greeted them on the way while hiding, but nothing beyond.
"Yeah, I know da drill." One of the orange right-hand men stepped forward, punching in the code and opening the vault.
"How about some of you guys stay here?" Snow suggested to her mini-army.
"I know I'm coming with you," Koji said, accompanying the ruler as Snow jumped in.
"And you're not leaving me, Afro Chick." Bowser followed. "This is my game, after all."
"Wow, I didn't know this game was called Super Bowser Bros.," Takuya quipped. "When did that change?"
"Remind me to deal with Ms. Sassy Red Head when I come out," roared the Koopa King, earning him a roll of the eyes for a response.
Snow, Koji, and Bowser swam through the clusters of character and item panels, all of which appeared fine and uninfected. But when they glanced at the environment panels, such as the Bowser Castle, Mushroom Kingdom, and Delfino Plaza ones, the trio noticed them flashing red.
"So, your places in this game are infected instead of you guys," said Snow.
"Got dat right," Don Pianta replied. "And you don't look so vibrant."
"That's because the virus infected more than just Sugar Rush's atmosphere. We got hit hard because of that."
"Well, we got da same thing over here." The head of the Pianta syndicate led the trio to the back of the code room, where a crimson panel with Japanese characters floated separately from the rest. "We don't know how it ended up in our game."
"Maybe one of the volunteers working on the Mushroom Ball put it in," Bowser guessed, examining the panel. "I'm surprised this thing didn't even infect us." The Koopa King reached out to touch it, but jumped back when the panel flashed rapidly, emitting sparks in all directions.
"What did you do?" Koji asked.
"Nothing. The damn thing flipped out on its own." Suddenly, the code room shook.
"Okay, that's not good," said Snow. She noticed the wall before them turning into pixels. "Shit! We need to get the fuck outta here, guys!" She swam toward the exit.
"Don't have to tell me twice!" Bowser followed, grabbing Don Pianta and Koji.
"Who the hell said you could carry me, you big dumbass?" The siren banged her fists against the Koopa King but didn't faze him.
"Would you rather die, then?" Bowser retorted.
"Let's get the hell out, guys!" Snow urged once her group made it out of the disintegrating code room.
"Get-a on me!" Mario instructed.
"If you think I'm..." Takuya was cut off by Rosalina and Lucina, who dragged her on the Nintendo Good Guy's back.
"That shut her up." Shulk climbed on, followed by Snow, who muttered, "Thank User." Don Pianta and Koji were the last to hop on, with Bowser reluctantly agreeing to be carried in Mario's claws.
"This is fucking embarrassing," the Koopa King grumbled as his nemesis scooped him up. He couldn't get over how much being consumed by a Cy-Bug enhanced Mario's strength. Bowser was impressed.
Mario ascended through the castle's ceilings, creating his own openings with his strength along with the combined efforts of armed or fighter characters. Rosalina and Iggy had used their wands to transfer some strength to Shulk and Lucina, both of whom had made up for what Mario had been short by in terms of strength, and broke through the basement's ceiling, then the first through third floors. Koji and Takuya had used their song to lull any ambushing Cy-Bugs to sleep, with Bowser torching those approaching the plumber head-on. The mutated plumber zeroed in on the port to Game Central Station, torching any Koopa-Cy-Bug hybrids threatening to give him trouble.
"Insubordination, all of you!" Bowser roared, making his own flaming contribution.
"And those Goomba-shaped ones are just...ugh!" Koji complained after she and Takuya finished putting down a trio of viruses shaped like the brown, limbless foes. "And it doesn't help that this place is going down quickly. Damn, this guy's working fast."
When the Nintendo Good Guy landed near the port, the mini-army made a break for the exit, but when Mario reached it, he was repelled by a red barrier. The plumber headbutted it, but it continued to keep him in.
"The firewall," Koji said. "And 'Stache Bro's considered one of them now." She nodded to the approaching Cy-Bugs presumably trying to escape the rapidly-vanishing world.
"Fuck that. I'll help you through!" Bowser went behind Mario's leg to force him through, but the weight was too great. The Nintendo Good Guy continued to push, but the firewall refused to allow him clearance.
"Bowser, just-a go," Mario urged, shoving the Koopa King through the exit.
"We're not leaving you!" Bowser argued, realizing that the disintegrating pixels were nearly at the entrance. "I'm gonna get you out!" He made another attempt to reenter, but Mario's claw stopped him.
"You don't-a have-a choice-a," the plumber said. "I can't-a leave-a. I'm virus-a now."
"Mario!"
"Look, we can't get him through," Takuya dragged the Koopa King toward the exit. "And everyone's already out but us. We need to go!"
"Is everyone out?" Snow asked once Takuya and Bowser reached Game Central Station.
"Yeah, we're the last ones," the redhead replied.
"I couldn't save Mario," Bowser said, punching the floor. "We maybe enemies in the game, but we're drinking buddies outside."
"Look, we'll save Mario," assured Snow. "But this gripping isn't going to help. We'll stop the douches who did this."
"I'm... going to Bowserize the wise guy," the Koopa King roared.
"We all know how you feel, Bowser." Rosalina floated to him, patting him on the shoulder, "And we want to stop this menace, too, but we don't know who it is or where to look."
"The first thing we need to do report this to Surge," Snow decided.
"Hi, guys!"
"Vanellope?" Snow turned to notice the president, Taffyta, Candlehead, and a white-haired woman exiting Tapper. Vanellope hugged the sherbet racer.
"Been a while." Taffyta punched Snow on the arm.
"This is Sora," Candlehead said. "She's a witch from Red Moon Racing and checking our code room, namely Vanellope's code."
"I'll tag along, too," Snow decided, then turned to her mini-army. "Guys, let Surge know what's happened in Super Mario Bros. I'm going to see what's up with Sugar Rush.
"All over it," Koji nodded, as she and the former prisoners headed to find Surge's office.
"So what hell's been going on?" Snow asked once her group left. "Where have you guys been? And picking up a crone at that?"
"We'll explain on the way inside," Vanellope said. "And Snow doesn't like people calling her out on her age."
"Are you Vanellope?"
The girls and Sora noticed a pink-haired girl coming out of one of the alleys.
"Wendee?" Sora recognized the girl.
"Wendee?" the girls repeated as the pink-haired girl caught up to them.
"Sora, haven't seen you in a while." Wendee caught her breath.
"Wendee? Dammit, slow down next time." A brown-haired woman staggered out of the alley, nearly sinking to her knees.
"And Mignogna's with you, too." The witch looked over the pink-haired woman's shoulder. "Where's Agnes?"
"That's part of why we came looking for her." Wendee nodded to Vanellope. "She's dead, by the way, along with Cody. Fix-It paid us a visit and killed them and..."
Vanellope raised an eyebrow, unaware of who Agnes and Cody were, but her code rippled a little at the sound of the Good Guy continuing his murdering spree.
"And Rancis," Mignogna finished, grabbing her sister's shoulder for support.
"What?" Vanellope glitched in shock. "Rancis?"
"No fucking way," Taffyta said, not believing what she just heard.
"You'd better believe it," Wendee confirmed. "Fix-It fried his code well done. And his being infected like you three made it worse." She nodded to Taffyta, Snow, and Candlehead.
"Who's going to be in last place now?" Taffyta asked.
"He was...supposed to take me to the ball." Vanellope remembered the peanut butter cup racer mustering up the strength to ask her in Burger Time. She had actually found it humorous and brave of him, seeing as it was a side she hadn't seen of him before. The president viewed it as a friendly outing, no romantic feelings involved. Rancis had only been a friend to Vanellope; that wouldn't change. But she still cared for him, making this inexcusable.
And she would avenge him by finding out about her code's abnormality. She clenched her fists, a glitch rushing through her, this time with determination.
"Vanellope?" Candlehead took one of the princess's clenched fists.
"We need to get in here," Vanellope decided as she sprinted toward Sugar Rush.
"I'd never been broken up over a man before," Mignogna said, watching the lead racer.
"That's because you only fuck them for energy, not love," Sora reminded. "I know all of the stories."
The brunette flipped the witch off in response, then she and Wendee regarded Taffyta, Candlehead, and Snow, with Wendee asking, "So, what happened in Super Mario Bros.?"
"And Sugar Rush," added Snow. "There must be some serious shit going on there, huh? And how's an old bat going to help?" That last comment earned the sherbet racer a glare from the witch.
"Let's trade stories on the way, okay?" Taffyta suggested.
…
"Ralph...I'm impressed..." T.K. took in deep breaths as the Bad Guy lifted himself off of her, recovering from the ride he'd endured. T.K. had benefited more from it, as she had been able to coerce Ralph into doing whatever she wanted when she wanted it done. And Ralph had given it to her, even though he wasn't aware of it, but that was the entire point. Otherwise, the Bad Guy would definitely have chosen to jump out of the window and risk suicide, which she guessed he would have rather wanted. The whole experience had made T.K.'s work worthwhile.
She pulled the wrecker into a kiss, then climbed out of bed toward the window, still nude from their activity. The succubus glanced out at the darkened, corrupt world that had been Sugar Rush.
"My virus has taken effect, and those brats are hard at work," she said. "Leading me to one request."
Ralph lifted his head, giving his full attention to her. He'd do anything to please his queen.
"You should rule alongside me. Now that the virus is taking full effect, you'll obey me without question. My charm alone failed, considering my embarrassment in Tapper years ago, but the virus in your code weakens your will." T.K. turned to face him, then planted another kiss, this time on his forehead.
"Your Majesty!" A knock on the door interrupted her.
"Damn cavities!" the succubus growled, glitching into her King Candy persona before she answered the door.
An Oreo guard stood at the doorway, and though T.K. couldn't see a face, she could sense desperation and haplessness.
"What isth it?" she demanded, shifting to the lisping voice.
"We've caught some insubordinate subjects trying to get out of the game," the guard replied cracks appearing in his body. Crumbs were falling, too. "They're in the Fungeon, but they're resisting and kicking our butts down there."
"And that explainsth your condition?"
"I'm telling you! I don't know how long we're gonna last!" the Oreo guard blurted out. "I'm the last one!"
"Not for long." The succubus produced her whip.
"What the heck?" The guard gulped, but had no time to ponder as her whip wrapped itself around him and squeezed him until nothing but crumbs and filling remained.
"I'll handle those brats," T.K. decided. "Ralph, you'll be okay alone, right? Not that you'll go anywhere, of course."
…
"I'd stay down if I were you," Jubileena suggested to the subdued Oreo guard, whose legs were crumbs from Crumbelina's hardened caramel attack. "We may not be able to break out, but we can defend ourselves until the rescue troupe arrives.
The cherry racer, Crumbs, and Swizzle had been fending off the Oreo guards in front of their cell after their attempts at torture and threats. The trio retaliated with their own attacks. Though weakened, they had succeeded in taking down the group, with Jubileena's cherry bombs and Crumbs' sword causing most of the damage, followed by Swizzle's tornado blowing the remains away.
"I still feel bad that we had to fight them," Crumbs said.
"I don't." Swizzle folded his arms. "Dude, these guys aren't our subjects. Not even close. If they were, we wouldn't be doing this."
"Good point." The posh racer sighed.
"And I sthee you three had quite the fun in here." King Candy's voice echoed in the hall.
"Really?" Jubileena groaned.
"Well, they don't call it 'Fungeon' for nothing, you know?" Swizzle retorted.
"I resthent that. I really do." The devil of Sugar Rush himself stopped in front of the trio's cell. "I heard that you were trying to esthcape."
"Yeah? What of it?" Jubileena spat. "We don't want to do your shitty labor."
"I sthee." The king nodded. "Apparently the Fungeon isn't enough for you three. And I honesthly didn't want to go down that route."
"Go ahead and give us the Hot Springs, ass can," the cherry racer decided. "We'll atke a game over versus working more hours for you...and not paying us jack."
"Oh no, not the Hot Springsth, hoo hoo hoo. A game over will not do you good, either. No no. I have a more sthuitable punishment in mind."
Crumbs scoffed. "What can be worse than death?"