Chapter 3
"Feelings"
"Clarke? Hey honey, How are you?" Clarke groans and sits up right in her bed and looks around to see if Lexa is in the room. He smiles as she sees that Lexa isn't there, she just isn't ready to face Lexa's admission of love towards her. She sighs and looks at her mother. "I'm okay, my head hurts, not as much as yesterday though. So that's nice waking up too. "Her mother smiles. "I'm glad to hear that. Let me check your head wound to see if its healing correctly. Hmm that looks fine by me, maybe a day or 2 more in bed then you should be alright to go home with us." Abby smiles at her daughter lovingly. "Okay sweetheart I'm going to need to head back to Camp Jaha, Raven or Octavia can stay with you if you want?"
"No thanks mum I'll be fine." Clarke smiles at her mother with some doubt. Abby looks at her daughter with worrisome. "Let me know if you need anything alright? Love you." Clarke watches her mother leave and sighs out of relieve, finally okay how do I get out of this place? Clarke puts her feet on the ground okay here we go she thought. She gently stands up and finds her balance. Okay just one step after the other she thinks. Clarke slowly walks to the door and grabs a post, okay maybe this wasn't so easy after all. Fuck it I need to get out of here. Clarke takes a deep breath and walks out of the room towards the exit of the tent. Crash.
"Ouch." Fuck. "Ahhh." "Clarke what are you doing out of bed? You should be resting!" Oh great just the person I wanted to crash into while escaping. "Just testing my feet, don't worry about me. I'm fine." "No you are not, you can't even stand on your two feet why would you test them out? Come on back to bed." Urgh Great. "I'm fine, really Lexa. I promise." Clarke tries to smile, but in vain. Lexa looks at her intensely "Clarke, don't lie to me please. I can tell you are not fine. You don't have to run away again, the people understand what you had to do. They don't hate you." Clarke sits down on the bed and turns her head away from Lexa. "No they don't understand and neither do you. So just go away!"
Clarke closes her eyes to hold back her tears and feelings. She swallows heavily and breaths slowly in and out to try to calm herself down. A tear escapes her left eye. "Clarke." Lexa goes to sit next to her and wipes of the tear with her thumb and rests her hand on Clarkes jaw and turns Clarkes face facing hers. "Look at me please?" Says Lexa lovingly. Clarke feels her heartbeat racing trying to jump out of her chest. Her stomach feels like it swallowed a dozen rocks and at the same time a dozen butterflies. Her breathing shudders. She feels her feelings arise in the depth of her heart trying to come back up for air. No. "Stop!"
Clarke pulls her head from Lexa's grip and stares angrily at Lexa. "I don't love you Lexa! So get out now!" Lexa looks hurt, but she composes herself quickly she stands up and clears her throat. "Fine, I'll send someone to look at your wounds and then you can go as you please." "Thank you, your highness." Clarke rolls her eyes, normally she would have felt bad for reacting that way but it was Lexa's own fault to make me feel again. Lexa turns around and walks out of the room. Clarke sighs and feels relieved that could have ended badly as in feeling again. I can never let that happen to me ever again 'Hodnes laik kwelnes'.
Xxx
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