A/N: I'm actually more invested in this than my other fic, but that will most likely quickly change just because.

Chapter 3: The one with Genma

I closed the bathroom door behind me, tying the drawstring of Sasuke's beige shorts as I did so. I felt uneasy and gross.

I feel like a pedophile. Fuck, does this make me a pedophile?

Realising that you were in the body of an eight year old boy was bad enough, having to bath and pee with said body was marginally much, much, worse. I would never get used to it. The uncomfortable thought that I would have to get used to it made my already bad mood even worse.

Shaking my head I looked around Sasuke's room for something to wear on my feet. Sasuke didn't have a carpet in his room, which meant there probably wouldn't be one covering the rest of the house, and the floor was cold.

Looking under the bed had me come out with a small stuffed kunai -which was kinda worrying- and a pair of slippers that were just the right size. So this really was Sasuke's room despite the size of the bed, which looked like it could fit five Sasuke's on it.

Either his parents really loved the kid or they thought he'd never leave them.

Throwing the bed one last glance over my shoulders, I left the room. Food was my main priority. So was trying to find out why I was in this particular predicament and if the ANBU (because there was no way Sasuke wasn't being watched after his fucking brother murdered his entire family) had noticed the fact that something was not quite right with Sasuke.

Although, I stopped right outside what looked like a kitchen, didn't Madara or Obito, or whatever, help Itachi with the murdering?

Instead of pondering on that thought and cursing my quickly fading memory, I made my way cautiously into the kitchen to look for anything I could possibly eat.

I opened the first of the five cupboards that lined the top of the kitchen counter and immediately closed it. It smelled absolutely horrid.

I didn't even get to see what was in it!

Eyeing the cupboard I decided I would leave to open again until I could manage to find a gas mask and some air freshner, I scooted to the left and opened the rest of them.

Inside the first cupboard directly in front of me were boxes of stuff I couldn't recognise. The second cupboard looked like a spice cupboard, and the third and fourth were filled, I noted glumly, with pots, pans and other cutlery. However, I was still against opening the fifth cupboard incase I ended up losing all my apetite, so I started to empty the first two cupboards instead.

By the time I'd managed to look through all the boxes-

there were a few boxes of pocky that were, unfotunately, expired for 2 years

-and rearranged the cupboards to hold the stuff that wasn't expired or growing mould, the rest I threw into the big bin near the back of the kitchen, I had a total of: random spices I could only vaguely recognise by the smell, a jar of what looked like beans, a packet labelled 'dashi kombu', and a bag of rice.

I looked between the fridge placed next to the sink and the cupboard I'd opened at the start, before deciding on the former. There was no way Sasuke ate expired and mouldy food, just no way. There had to be something in the fridge.

Like eggs!

Lighting up at the propect of fried eggs I hummed my way to the fridge, basking in the coolness of the air when I opened it and staring expectantly at the frdige full of-

Nothing.

I blinked rapidly. There was absolutely nothing in the fridge.

There was nothing edible. At all.

I didn't have faith in an eight year old, who was probably feeling hate and determination to kill the cause of said hate, to actually be fully equipped with food and proper nutrition. But I did have faith in the village to do something about it. Clearly, that faith was misplaced.

Clearly.

My stomach chose that exact moment to let out a noise that wouldv'e been embarassing if anyone else was present -a voice in my head that sounded oddly like Sasuke said that obviously someone was, but I dismissed it. Because even if the Hokage had put Sasuke under surveillance, there was no way a bunch of ninjas I couldn't see nor sense would embarass me.

I sighed and shuffled over to the first cupboard. Maybe little Sasuke could cook and knew how to with the stuff he had, but I definitely could not.

Speaking of Little Sasuke, I wonder what happened to him.

If I had ended up in eight-year old Sasuke's body, what had happened to his mind, and more importantly; what would happen to my body.

Fuck. I need to figure out what happened and fast, there's no way I'm staying here.

Shivering at the thought that maybe there was no way back, I quickly opened the cupboard door, hand flying to my face to shield against the assaulting smells. But, unfortunately, the smell won and invaded my senses, causing me to fall to my knees, gagging.

I slowly got back up, coughing violently. The smell was worse the higher and closer you got to the damned place. Eyes watering I looked on, trying to make out what exactly was inside.

What greeted me was a sight I'd have forever etched into my memory, which I would recall to people everywhere as my first encounter with true horror. 'What about the massacre?' they'd ask, 'No,' I'd reply, shivering violently, 'this was worse.'

There was some brown stuff (that looked like it could've been chocolate maybe eons ago) stuck to the sides of the cupboard, mould sprouting and covering the bottom and back. Some type of insect had made a home of the empty wrappers near the back and were apparently multiplying and secreting a combination of weird smells and liquids. There was a half empty cup of noodles lying on its side, noodles spilling out, but they no longer looked like noodles, they looked like some type of monster from hell had decided to possess the food and come alive.

I quickly slammed the door shut, making a mental note to buy some chains and a lock because there was no way I would be opening that unless I managed a C-Rank level water jutsu or could hire someone to clean it.

I think the hiring this is most likely, might have to talk to the Hokage about Sasuke's inheritance. Among other things.

After raiding the rest of the house, and avoiding any to all bedrooms -the Uchiha's were kind enough to label the outside of each room- I sat on the only blood free cushion in what looked like a sitting room. I really needed to check the other houses in the compound sometime soon and clean all this blood out.

Money was apparently a thing I would either have to ask someone about, or try my hand at breaking into a safe and Sasuke's parents' room. Which, admittedly, I really did not want to do. Itachi's room was a big 'NO' unless I was desperate for a way to try and make people see that I didn't want to kill him anymore. Hopefully it wouldn't be that hard.

Hopefully.

Food would also quickly become a problem. My stomach was probably eating itself right now and-

That was a knock. Somebody's knocking on our door.

I quickly got up and made my way to the door, slipping on the tiny sandles next to it just incase I'd need to make a run for it. I hadn't tested the full motor functions of this body yet, especially anything ninja related, and to be honest I really didn't want to. I just wanted to go home and not have to worry about being in someone else's body.

"Ah, hello?" I called out from behind the closed door. There was no way I was going to open the door without some indication to who was on the other side.

"Uchiha-san?" Came the confused reply.

"That's me. What do you want?"

There was a hesistant pause before the person on the other side cleared their throat and said, "I'm here to escort you to your appointment, Uchiha-san."

I briefly wondered why they were being so polite and not demanding that I open up the door, and also why they were referring to an eight-year old with 'Uchiha-san', when I realised something.

Fuck, was I speaking in english? And did the person reply in Japanese?

Biting my lip nervously I opened the door just a crack, peering through the small opening to look at the person on the other side. My eyes widened when I recognised the ninja standing on my (Sasuke's?) porch.

Isn't that Genma?

"Genma-san?" I questioned, because really I had no idea what to say and I didn't even know what this appointment could be about, "What appointment?"

Maybe little Sasuke wasn't someone who remembered stuff like this, afterall; he had a brother he wanted to kill.

Genma (and I was sure it was him because that bored facial expression and senbon and headband combination could only be one ninja) just looked at me and then slouched, tucking his hands into his trouser pockets. "It's not like you to forget an appointment, Uchiha-san."

And he was still replying in Japanese and for some odd reason I could actually understand it perfectly.

The writing was weird, but the speaking too? Come on!

I scratched the back of my neck and tried not to look like I was actually a sixteen-year old in Sasuke's body. "I've had a bad day."

Genma's eyes narrowed suspiciously and I fidgeted. I wasn't sure if he was doing that so openly because he suspected me, or because that was how he was with Sasuke. I was definitely going with the former, too paranoid to think of any alternatives.

Gulping, I shuffled on the spot before freezing up. There was no way Sasuke would shuffle nerbously, would he? Sure, he was eight but still. He was also Sasuke Uchiha. He didn't strike me as the 'show some ninja you're nervous' type. Instead I stilled and willed myself to keep any to all nervous ticks completely inside my head.

After a few more seconds of just standing there and staring at me, Genma turned around and began walking away, "Follow me."

Sighing in relief I grabbed the grey jacket off it's hook and jogged to keep up with Genma's slow, but long strides.

I'm so screwed.

A/N: Okay so this will be slow, like super slow. I'm not even kidding. To make things easier; italics is people speaking in english, and normal font is japanese. This will be addressed in later chapters. The language barrier was something I wanted to explore because I found it kinda weird that everyone spoke the same language in the manga and understood each other. Perfectly.

Also the problems with taking over a person's body and not dying in your previous one will also be sorted through in later chapters. There will be a lot of blood and falling over and hurting. So much hurting.

Anyway, reviews will encourage me to maybe introduce Naruto and Sakura faster? If that strikes your fancy, review?

(I'm lying I'm too lazy, Sakura will be introduced way after Naruto tbh.)