Happy Holidays Everyone!

My gift to you this Christmas... 2 of 3 chapters for the week... Enjoy

Chapter 57

Walking into the building, Callie dusted the snow off her coat. She loved this time of year, she loved walking the snowy streets of Seattle looking at all the Christmas decorations the shops dawned. Even though it was blue cold and pouring snow she managed to do a little window shopping and picked up one last gift for her wife she knew she would love before meeting her for dinner at Joes. She had been doing a lot of debating with herself over her wife's gift but after a lot of thinking she knew this was the perfect gift. Walking downstairs into the bar, seeing that her wife hadn't made it yet she walked up to the uncrowded bar and waited for Joe. Looking around the bar, she guessed the impending snow storm kept most everyone at home this evening. Joe walked out from the kitchen and saw one of his favorite customers standing by the bar. "Joe." Callie smiled. "Merry Christmas." She told her friend.

"Hey Callie, Feliz Navidad. Where is your better half?" He asked, pulling a glass from the rack.

"She's out with her mom. She's a suppose to meet me here, we're having dinner before the gang shows up. Barb insisted that if we were cooking Christmas dinner again this year that she was buying all the groceries. So she and Arizona went to the grocery store before the storm hit. But it looks like it's here sooner than anyone expected."

"Yeah. I haven't looked out lately, but I know it must be getting bad out if the bar is this empty a few days before Christmas."

"Yeah."

"You sure you wanna stay and eat? I can make you guys something to go. I don't want you to get into a wreck in this weather."

"No, we'll be okay, her mom should be dropping her off anytime. Plus if the roads get that bad we will just crash at Addison's or Karev's across the street."

"Good. Earlier I had a little Christmas dinner here for my employees, I have tons left over. How about I make you and the Mrs. a plate?"

"Yea, that sounds perfect, thanks Joe."

"So what can I get you to drink while you wait?" He asked, sitting the empty glass on the counter. "I have this new holiday drink, it's called 'A Merry Christmas.'It's selling like crazy."

"What's in it?"

"Gin, cranberry juice, a splash of lemon juice and club soda."

"Sounds good so why not. I'll give it a try." She told him, checking her phone to see if her wife had called. Seeing a small rush of off duty hospital employees come through the door, she decided to grab a seat before the large table was occupied. "Take you're time, I'll just grab a seat."

"Okay, I'll bring out your dinner when Arizona arrives." He told her as she walked away.

"Thanks Joe." She threw over her shoulder, taking the large table in the back next to the jut box. Taking a seat, she pulled out the small leather book from her purse. She knew that she might be at Joes a while before her wife showed up so she decided to bring some good reading material along to pass the time. Opening the journal, Callie skimmed through the pages of the book as Joe brought her drink to her.

"Whatcha got there?" He asked, sitting her drink on the coaster.

"Hmm?" She said, looking up. "Oh, right.. Sorry." She smiled, shutting the journal. "Just a book Arizona gave me on our wedding day."

"What's it about?"

"Oh.. Um.. just a.." She tried to come up with something to say. She didn't want anyone to know about this journal, it was something she wanted to keep private between her and her wife. "..little lesbian romance novel, it's Arizona's favorite." She smiled, taking a sip of her drink. "That's really good Joe.. keep them coming." She winked, hoping he would take the hint and leave the table.

"Will do, enjoy." He said, walking back to the bar. Opening the journal again, she skimmed through the pages. Stopping on a very familiar date. She hadn't read in the journal since their first day on their honeymoon and that was three months ago now. Their life had been busy since returning to work, school had just went back into session which meant sports and after school activities were in full swing and kids were coming in hurt and or sick with the start of the cold season.

November 8, 2014

Oh lord, where do I begin.. My precious Calliope has been in the hospital for a whole day now. I guess I should explain huh? I really don't even know where to begin though. I had to stay over for work Friday night to see a patient so Callie went on home to make us dinner. But little did I know, she was attacked in the back alley of the clinic last night on her way home from work. Words can't even begin to describe how you feel when you see the woman you love lying lifeless on the cold ground. My heart dropped when I saw her black flats on her feet, it literally shattered into a million pieces when I saw her bloodied face. How can someone hurt her so badly? What adds to this terrible mess is the attacker. I'm almost a hundred percent sure her attacker is the same guy who killed my brother. And in the back of my mind is the slightest thought that if she weren't with me, maybe she wouldn't be laid up in the hospital unconscious right now.

I attacked the man before realization even hit. I started beating him, but he threw me off of his back and turned on me. I have a few bruises and some stitches, but I'll survive. Callie on the other hand... She was beat pretty badly. She was unconscious when I finally got to my baby. That bastard had ripped her shirt open and had tried to pull her pants down, he was going to rape her and I would have honestly killed him with my bare hands if he had done so. It would have been well worth sitting in prison for the rest of my life to know that he would pay the ultimate price for his crime. But only by the grace of God (Weird that I say that because I'm the least religious person I know.) Callie wasn't raped. I think I found her just in time though. And thank god for this homeless man named Karev, he saved me last night. That man was going to kill me. I realized who he was, he was the same guy who attacked me the night JoAnn cheated on me. He killed Tim and I told him I knew it. He started chocking me and told me to say hello to my brother. But Karev knocked him off of me. So even though my body was screaming in pain from his blows, I went to my girlfriend, I had to help her.. To let her know I was there and she didn't have to be scared anymore. Thankfully Teddy was still at the clinic, hearing the commotion out back she called an ambulance.

I have not left her side the whole time until this evening when Derek, Teddy and Mark made me go home. So here I am. Sitting in my bed listening to Teddy snore. Its nice having her with me but it's just not the same as Calliope's light snore. Her snore puts me at ease. I know this is going to sound weird, but it makes me feel so safe. God if she ever finds out I wrote about her snoring she would kill me. I can't help it though, I love everything about her. Even the things she hates.. I love. I just need her to be okay. God I want to hear her voice so bad. I'd give up everything I have to just hear her right now, even if it's just one of her Spanish rants. I think she's so pretty when she's mad.. not that she's not pretty all the time, but there is something about her that I find striking when she's mad and boy I could see the steam coming out of her ears if I told her that in one of her moments.

With everything that has happened tonight, I think it's about time I have a talk with Teddy about what happened the night of Tim's death but I wanted Callie here for that talk. Because I know Teddy and I both need someone to stay strong for us, but I guess we'll just lean on each other.

It's the middle of the night and I really should be getting some sleep for when Derek wakes her up tomorrow but sleeps the last thing on my mind right now. Maybe I'll go downstairs and have a glass of wine to see if it'll relax me a little bit.

Being so engrossed in her reading, Callie hadn't noticed the swarm of people that had meandered into the establishment, looking at her phone hoping she had missed a text from her wife. Seeing she had no new texts, worry began to set I when she saw the time. Her wife had said that she would be there by now and she still hadn't showed. Sending a quick text, she went back to her reading just as Joe walked back up to her table.

"Refill for you ma'am. And also a shot of tequila from the blonde at the bar." he said, laying the two drinks on the table.

Looking behind her, she didn't see a blonde at the bar at first, turning back to Joe, "Who sent it?" She a asked, closing her book.

"She didn't say her name, she just said sent it to the pretty lady in the back... And well you're the only one back here so.." He shrugged and walked off. Looking around, her eyes met a very familiar blonde at the side of the bar. Feeling her heart rate pick up immediately, she quickly turned back around praying that wasn't the blonde he was referring to. She hadn't seen her in almost seven months and she sure as hell wasn't ready to see her tonight. Pushing the drink away from her, she picked her phone back up hoping her wife would text. Not getting a response like she usually does, she decided to call.

"Hey, it's me. I was just wondering when you're going to be here. Call or text me back sweetie. Give your mom my love.. I love you baby, be careful... Bye." She said, leaving her wife a voice message. Opening her journal back up in hopes of getting immersed in her wife's writing and forgetting all of those who were around here, she felt a presence behind her. Stiffening, she waited with bated breath for the person to make their move.

"Hey there beautiful." The voice housed in her ear. "Mind if I join you?" Feeling arms wrap around her front, she relaxed in the ever familiar embrace.

Feeling her wife kiss her behind her ear, "It was you." She sighed, relieved that Erica wasn't up to her old tricks again.

Kissing her wife on the cheek, "What was me and.. why didn't you take your shot I ordered for you?" Arizona asked, sitting across from her wife.

"Where were you?"

"I'm sorry I'm late, mama decided to she needed to get a few more gifts for my cousins baby while we were out." She sighed sitting down. "I swear it honestly pains me to go in a baby store." She pouted. Arizona hadn't talked much about wanting a baby since the day Melinda had Robbin in their clinic. She knew if seeing the miracle of birth wouldn't change her wife's mind there was nothing she could say to get her to change it, but she couldn't help dropping hints at times.

Brushing off her wife's baby comment, "I didn't see you. Joe said someone sent me over a drink.. And I didn't see you. Where were you?" She asked, looking to her wife before glancing back towards the bar where Erica sat with a group of doctors.

"I ran downstairs to make sure you were here before mama took off and left me here stranded all by my lonesome. I saw you sittings over here so I decided to have Joe send you a shot while a ran back outside to tell mama she could leave. I was going to call you, but my phone died about an hour ago."

"Oh.. I missed you." She said, putting the journal back in her purse.

"I missed you too babe." She said, leaning over the table for a kiss. "You been reading?"

"Yeah, it's the first time I had the chance since the honeymoon."

"Where are you at?"

"I'm was just skipping through. I stopped on the day after my attack. You were at home with Teddy."

"Ahh.. that night. I'll be surprised if my writing even makes since. My mind was so frazzled with many emotions. I felt like I had lost it durning that time."

"It's not.. It's good. But so real, ya know." She said, caressing her wife's arms. "I'm sorry you had to go through that. I think I would have went crazy if I would have been you."

"Yeah.. It was rough. But I think it's kinda good we can go back and read it, kinda keeps you grateful for what we have now."

"Yeah, my thoughts exactly." She smiled nervously.

"What's wrong? You seem all tense, sweetheart." Arizona asked, placing her hands on her wife's that were now lying on the table.

"Take a look at the left side of the bar." Callie said, taking her shot her wife ordered for her.

Arizona scanned the bar not seeing anything out of the ordinary. "Oookay?" She shrugged. "What's up, Cal?" She asked, looking back towards her wife.

"Erica's here."

"Hahn? Seriously?" Arizona whispered, looking around again.

"No." She said, turning her wife's face back towards her. "Don't look around. Hopefully she doesn't know we're here, I sure don't want her finding out. I know her, if she sees us looking she'll come over and I don't want to deal with that right now."

"I don't either, but I don't think we'll be able to stay non conspicuous the whole night, especially after everyone else gets here and the drinks start flowing."

"Yeah I know, but there will be a lot more people around. Mark and Cristina, she won't come over if they're here. Or at least I hope not. When Joe told me that a blonde sent me a drink I thought it was her at first."

"I'm sorry, I should have told him to tell you it was me." The blonde replied.

"No, I like when you do that.. It kinda boosts my ego." She smiled.

"You don't need an ego boost, you already know you're a keeper." She winked kissing her hands. "What did you order us for dinner? Joe said he'd have it right out."

"A little Christmas dinner." She winked. "He had cooked for his employees earlier and he had left overs and asked if we wanted some."

"Sounds good. I'm starving, I haven't ate since breakfast. And being at the grocery story with my mom made it worse. I swear I wanted to eat everything I saw." She laughed. "I saw grape tomatoes and then chocolate pudding and I just started imagining how delicious they would taste together." She cringed, thinking about it now.

"Eww.. My god." Callie laughed. "If I didn't know better I would say it you're a pregnant woman."

"It's not because I don't want one of us to be." Arizona said, hoping to get Callie talking about it again.

"So, were the roads bad on your way back?" She asked, turning the conversation to something different. "I was getting worried, especially after I texted and called and I didn't get a response from you."

"Sorry. They were fine." Arizona sighed, slumping her shoulders. "They're salted really good for now. My moms suppose to text you to let me know she made it home safe." She said, feeling defeated.

"Okay." She said, pulling her phone from her purse and laying it on the table so they wouldn't miss her text as Joe brought them their dinner along with a drink for her wife.

"Thanks Joe." Arizona smiled up at the man. "Looks good." She said, placing her napkin in her lap.

"You're welcome." He said, placing her drink down in front of her. "And your drink. Let me know if you like it." He said, leaving the two to eat.

"What did you order?" Callie asked, looking at the green drink with a strawberry on the rim.

"I think he called it The Grinch." She said, taking a sip of her drink.

"Good?" She asked, seeing her wife wasn't meeting her eyes.

"Yeah." She said, opening her silverware.

"What's wrong?" Callie asked, seeing her wife's demeanor change.

"Nothing.. just hungry." She said, taking a bite of her food.

"Arizona." Callie said, seeing her wife's stoned face, knowing the baby issue was going to turn into something more sooner or later. "It's not nothing. I know what it is. I've been skirt tailing around the subject since Paris, and it's making you mad. Am I right?"

Feeling her walls break on the subject, she let what she's been holding in out. "I just don't get it Callie. You know this was never something I wanted until I met you and I warmed up to the idea. When we were dating and engaged that's all you talked about. And now that we're married, it's like you don't want to have a baby with me. How should I not be hurt by that?"

"Arizona, it's not that. We just got married."

"I know that, you've told me enough times." She said, dropping her fork in her plate in irritation.

Seeing her wife was getting upset, "Arizona." She said, scooting her plate to the side. "It's not that I don't want a baby with you, you know I do." She said taking her wife's hand.

"Then why? We've been together for almost two years now. Why wait if it's something we want?"

"It's not something I want right now. We just got married.."

"I jus..."

"Don't." Callie said, closing her wife's mouth shut. "Let me talk." Seeing her wife roll her eyes in annoyment, she continued. "I just want to have some time with you as my wife before we have someone in our lives who will take our attention away from each other. Because once we do this... there is no turning back, it won't just be us anymore. We can't just be spontaneous and decided we want to go to Miami or.. or Paris for a week on a whim. We'll always have a baby to think about first."

"Do you not think I've not thought about all of this? That's all I think about.. how this would change our relationship. But I don't see it as disastrous as you do evidently."

"I'm not saying it would be disastrous to us." She growled in frustration. She didn't understand why Arizona couldn't comprehend what she was trying to say.

"Do you think this is easy for me? That.. that I want.. to want something my wife has no interest in? I can't get away from it, Callie. I'm not doing this on purpose or something just to have a scuffle with you. But even before Melinda came into the clinic and every time thereafter a baby comes in for a checkup, I can't help but think about what our baby would look like. Would it have your brown hair and my eyes? Or.. or my dimples and hair and your eyes and skin color." She said, shaking her head and wiping the tear out of her eye.

"I wonder that too, babe." She said, seeing her wife scoff. "I do, Ari. I told you before that when I was sedated after my attack I had a dream that you were pregnant with my baby.. I want that more than anything in this world Arizona. I wish you believed me. It's something I think about that all the time. I just... I don't know if I'm ready." She said quietly.

"Why?"

"I want this.. I do. But what if.. what if I'm terrible at it. What if I'm a horrible mom, Arizona."

"Calliope.." Arizona said, watching her wife's face fall at her admissions. "Why do you think that? I think you'd be an amazing mom. You'd be our kids favorite because I know you're my favorite."

"Why do you think that? I mean hell I couldn't even handle the Avery and Teddy situation a few months ago without losing my shit." She said, looking over at the picture on the wall not wanting to meet her wife's eyes now.

"Because you are a great wife. You're caring, loving, considerate, you always put me first. You make sure to let me know how much I'm appreciated.. every single day and I know you'd always do the same for our baby just like I would." Hooking her index finger under her wife's chin, she pulled her wife's face up hoping to meet her gaze. "You'd be an amazing mom, Calliope. But.." She sighed, hoping she wouldn't come to regret what she was about to say, knowing if one of them didn't give in on this subject it was doomed for a huge blow out. "If you're not ready... you're not ready and I'll respect that. It will be hard.. but I won't bring it up again until you're ready to talk about it."

"You'd really do that for me?" She asked, hoping her wife was giving in on the subject.

"Yeah.. I mean.. for a while anyway." She teased, trying to lighten the mood. "If ten years down the road your still tight lipped on the subject and we're both getting wrinkles and graying.. I'll probably bring it up again." She shrugged with a soft smile.

"I won't take that long to bring it up.." Callie said, giving her wife a half smile. "I promise."

"Okay.. I'll drop it for now.." She said, kissing her wife's hand.

"How about after Christmas and New Years, we talk about it again. I mean really talk about it this time. No fighting, no getting pissed at each other. We sit down like adults and weigh the pros and cons, and we'll go from there." Callie said squeezing her wife's hands.

"If that's what you want?"

"Yeah, I do."

"Well alright then, that's what we'll do." Arizona said, cupping her wife's face and running her thumb over her cheek.

"Alright then."

"Eat up, everyone should be arriving soon and I'm sure once Cristina and Meredith get here the liquor will start flowing freely." Arizona said, taking another bite of her food.

Nodding, "You're right." She laughed. "Love you."

"Love you too, babe." Arizona said, never letting go of her wife's hand.

Posting chapter 58 sometime tomorrow! Reviews is an awesome thank you! :) plus they help me write better. Follow me on Twitter at AnatomyofGreys1 to be the first to know about updates.