Space Hog

WOO, THIS CHAPTER WILL SCREW EVERYONE OVER!

edit: no, they aren't gonna fuck.

STORY IS NOW!

"Protect the master!" Dawn Watchers suddenly jumped in and summoned a barrier in front of the three. Fusion Ganon rammed into it the barrier, the barrier being forcefully pushed back to prevent it from breaking.

"What is that?!" Bell asked, seeing the large pig.

"A Fusion, sire! I suggest you escape before the barrier is broken and the Fusion army forwards!" A Dawn Watcher told him, "I suggest immediate consideration to my suggestion sire!"

"Alright. I'll take VERY IMMEDIATE ACTION!" Mite replied and the two began pushing the treasure chest towards the ship. Fusion Ganon broke through the barrier in time the two pushed the chest towards the spaceship's direction, GIR sitting on top of it. Fusion Ganon rammed into the Dawn Watchers, knocking them everywhere like bowling pins. Fusion Ganon eyed the two and attempted to rush towards them but a Dawn Watcher went on his face.

"Perish vile fiend!"

"GRAH!" The monster roared and went the wrong direction just to attempt to get its own species off its face. It headed straight towards the crater of Fusions and Dawn Watchers fighting to the death and began plowing through them, ally and enemy alike. Some were rammed into the air, flying comically out of the gravity pull of the asteroid.

"Provide me assistance!" A Dawn Watcher screamed as he suffocated. Back with Mite and Bell, they pushed the treasure chest into the ship, setting it in the cockpit.

"Why is it called a cockpit?"

"Eh?" Mite looked at Bell strangely.

"Like, is there an actually cock here? Is it the levers that make this 'cock'? Or do out your cock in the keyhole-"

"WHERE IS THIS CONVERSATION LEADING?!" He yelled, looking at the girl with white hair, "Also, why is your hair white?"

"Because I would look cute this way?" She grabbed Mite's cheeks, "You look like those guys who sexually harass cute girls in middle school." She shook his face.

"Don't do that in front of GIR!" Mite set the robot on the driver's seat, "Anyway, we need to head back there."

"Why can't we just ditch this rock and go back to nice gravity!" She said but he shook his head.

"Those guys, the Dawn Watchers saved my ass out there. I gotta do the same for them." He told her and brought out his Missile Gloves.

"That sounds corny as hell." She stated, "I'm coming then." She brought out FATE from thin air.

"You won't come till you're married and get drunk too much." He laughed at his own joke and the two exited the spacecraft and closed it to prevent anyone from getting inside.

"I'm still innocent!"

"Like that's true..."

"What?"

"Nothing!" The two ran into the crater and the battlefield. Fusion Ganon was busy running down anybody who set foot in there. Dawn Watchers and Fusions alike were still clashing despite the giant pig mowing down everybody.

"I feel less confident." Bell said, "Really, a giant pig is wrecking everybody." She gave a nervous glance, seeing Fusion Ganon's own ally was impaled by its horns, "Now I feel more nervous."

"C'mon!" He grabbed her hand and the two headed into the field of battle. Mite told her to get on his back for the first time which she did as he pointed his gloves into the ground. Two Fusions headed towards them but Mite blasted themselves off the ground. The two were propelled into the air and jumped onto a Fusion. The two were in a middle of a crowd, one Dawn Watcher decapitating a Fusion.

"This makes me even more nervous! Thanks for this stupid idea!" Bell spoke, holding FATE, "We could have just used the spaceship's laser weapons!"

"We don't have laser weapons!" Bell went up to Mite and grabbed something and put it on his head.

A pair of cat ears.

"Why here and now?" He asked, Bell looked happily at her work.

"So you're always obedient to me."

"Am I your pet?"

"Seems like it. Also behind you." Bell used the large sword to slash an oncoming Fusion that was gonna hit Mite, "You owe me."

"Owe you what?"

"Our survival!" She slashed another Fusion, "I know, don't attack your friends, I get it." She ran off to Jesus knows where and Mite groaned, he took out his gloves and shot at some Fusions. He saw a glimpse of Bell heading towards the large pig.

"Bell don't!" Mite attempted to catch up with her but Fusions were blocking his way, he shot himself of the ground and landed on top of a Fusion. He proceeded to shoot any Fusion heading towards him as he ran through the crowd of fighters. He finally found Bell who was busy deflecting blows with Fusion Ganon's claws.

"Do you want to mess with me?!" The monster roared in response and Bell slashed it by its legs, "HAHA! You suck AND SWALLOW!" She proceeded to swing the blade upward, slashing the pig's face in half. The insides of the head shot a laser, a green beam that seemed to shine enough to vaporize someone.

"BELL!" Mite pushed her out of the way as the laser began aiming at everything.

"My fellow dignitaries, TAKE COVEE!" The Dawn Watchers quickly sprawled to find a safe place as the laser began firing, the remaining Fusion army didn't get a chance to react as they were vaporized the moment the laser had contact with them. The beast began shaking and then stopped after shooting the laser out for awhile, the body itself began turning black, oil-ish. Then the oil suddenly began rising into the air and flying back to wherever.

"What was that? First it shoots lasers and now it turns into car fuel, what?" She questioned, looking at the empty asteroid.

"Jesus, it killed everyone Star Trek style!" Mite exclaimed, "Where did the thing go though?"

On the mound where he transformed, the oil formed into the shape of Fusion Ganondorf who gasped for breath, "Dammit. Those children are more powerful than I thought." Fusion Ganondorf mused, "I must retreat and think of another plan. Fuse shall fall one day." The Fusion began limping back onto his invisible spaceship.

Back with Mite and Bell...

"You mean THIS was the machine?!" She screamed, seeing the contents in the chest were in fact a USB, "Why keep it in a chest when you can just put it under a mat?!"

"Bell shut up! Oh, yeah, thanks for the help." Mite told the Dawn Watchers, "You really saved out butts out there."

"Yes, we indeed saved your buttocks. But we live to serve you Lord Mite, our hearts are directly connected to yours and that we are summoned when your senses desire extreme assistance." The Dawn Watcher told him and he seemed unamused,

"Is that a metaphor for my hormones?"

"No sir. Now the immediate danger is vanquished, our bodies shall disintegrate and our essences shall return to your body shortly." The Dawn Watcher stated, the bodies of the Dawn Watchers began vanishing into the air.

"Wait, you'll be with me forever?"

"Precisely sir."

"Even if I have sex?"

"Indeed."

Mite remained silent, a bit horrified as the bodies of the Dawn Watchers vanished into the air entirely and particles of them began going onto his heart.

"Done yet?" Bell asked him, "About sex and things?" She began giggled, "Hey, at least someone who decides to do it with you doesn't have to be awkward." Mite gave her a look.

"Better shut it." She simply laughed it off as the two boarded the ship and back home.

"Here Dexter, this took a lot of trouble." Mite told the genius, "Giant pigs and stuff." He handed the USB and Dexter grabbed the item.

"Thank you. If there is anyway I can repay you, it will be done." He told them.

"Well, lots of cash, some big steak, maybe a new pair of pants and a-" Mite put a hand over Bell's mouth.

"Just thanks is fine." He began grabbing Bell by her ear.

"Good. The government is pressuring me to build nuclear weapons." He sighed, "I've been in tight situations before."

"Then we bid you goodbye, I need fresh air." The three began walking out of the lab, both holding GIR by its hands. Dexter looked onto the two.

"Even the simplest of beings know those two were meant for each other." Dexter then looked upon his USB, "Now, what to find out about you Mite."

"FB?" Fuse came into her room, the girl looking at her window.

"Yeah? What?" She looked at him but he had a look of comfort, "Never seen you so relaxed."

"H-Hey wait! It takes a lot of time to get his face on!" He said, Fusion Bell making an odd look at him.

"Are you hiding something?"

"What? Of course I was hiding something!"

"What are you hiding?"

"I'm supposed to say it formally!"

"Sounds stupid, tell me! Is it a present?"

"No."

"Is it a puppy?"

"We don't even have puppies on this planet!"

"Is it one of those toys woman use?"

"NO!"

"Tell me, tell me!"

"WILL YOU MARRY ME?!"

The two remained silent after Fuse blurted out his proposal. Fusion Bell gave him a stunned look.

"W-What?"

"Will you marry me?" He asked, "I love you FB. More than anything I could have ever loved. You gave me light in a world of dark. You saved me from myself. You don't have to say yes though-" She suddenly ran up to him and hugged him.

"Of course I would say yes!" She yelled, "I've been waiting for you to say that! Where's my ring?!" Fuse brought out the small box from his pocket and she squealed, "THANK YOU!" She hugged him tighter.

"I-I c-can't breath!"

WOO, THAT TOOK AWHILE THANKS TOO CRAPPY INTERNET.

ALSO, CUTE ENDING.

edit: they look so cute together...I feel guilty.

STAY TUNED!