I fucked up.

I was still in the place where Sasuke left me, rolling around on the floor in pain. Some of my ribs were broken, I could just tell. The pain was too overwhelming; I couldn't even get up off the floor. While I was lying there, memories of how most of these issues with Sasuke started flashing back to me. There was so much deep regret. I shouldn't have ever gotten into this. What was I thinking?

All of this started after Sasuke's parents were murdered by Itachi. I wouldn't have ever thought that Itachi would do something like that. He was such a calm and easy-going person. When I heard the news, I kept calling Sasuke over and over again. He wouldn't even answer his phone. I wanted to go over to his house to check on him, but what if he wanted to be alone?

Sasuke's house was huge. The house was cut up into a few sections. All I knew was that Sasuke's dad made a lot of money to afford to get extra sections added onto their house.

I went to school every day, hoping that Sasuke would come. I needed to know if he was okay. It was an entire week and he was still a no show. Sakura was worried about Sasuke too. She said it was best for us to give Sasuke some distance and he'll talk to us when he's ready.

At the time of Sasuke situation, Sakura was having some problems of her own. Sakura and I have been dating since we were 15. We're 17 now. Sakura was having a lot of problems with her parents. She was always calling me at night while her parents were arguing. Sakura would tell me about how selfish her mom is and how her dad was consistently cheating on her mom because they never spent enough time together. I would always tell her "Things are going to get better sooner or later; you just have to be patient for the change."

It was another week without hearing anything from Sasuke. I continued to call, but no answer. This time I decided to stop by his house. When I got to his house, nothing felt right anymore. Everything just had a dark atmosphere around it. I was just hoping everything was okay with Sasuke. I know the wombs of his parents being gone is still there, but I wanted him to know I was there for him.

Before I walked through the gates, I rang the bell. There was a small speaker. If someone replied back to the ring, they would ask who you were, and if you could enter or not. There wasn't an answer, so I just walked right in.

I walked to the main hall's door and knocked on it lightly.

"Sasuke? Sasuke, are you here? I just wanted to come check up on." There wasn't an answer. As I went to walk away, I heard the door open up behind me. I turned around and Sasuke was standing there with a suit on.

"What's up, Naruto?" There weren't any lights on from what I could see peering in the house while the door was open. Maybe he was sleep or something.

"I haven't heard from you or seen you in over a week, man. Is everything alright? I'm sorry about your parents…"

"I'm fine. I just needed some time to myself."

"I'm sorry if I bothered you or anything."

"It's alright. Just come by if you need anything."

"Alright." Sasuke smiled at me before he closed the door. I left and went about my business.

Right when I got home, I called Sakura. While I was on the phone with her, she would help me with my homework over the phone. I wasn't the best at math or anything that had to do with it. Sakura was just so amazing to me, even when I could be clueless, or lazy.

Once we got off the phone, I went to sleep. It was only about 10 p.m. I didn't even know why I was so exhausted.

I was living in a house with my grandfather Jiraiya. He was rarely home though, so I was alone most of the time. Jiraiya did a lot of work out of town and over sea. I only saw him about ten times out of the year. He covered all the bills for the house and sent me money for groceries when I needed them. I started living with him when I was younger when my parents passed away. I can imagine what kind of pain Sasuke is going through. I lost my parents too.

Sakura arrived at my house later on that night. It was about 3 a.m when she got here. She had a key to the house. I got her one made so she could come over anytime she'd like. I didn't mind at all. I woke up when I felt something pressed against my chest.

When I woke up, Sakura was leaning over me, and her hand on my chest, gently nudging me.

"Sakura? What's wrong? What are you doing here? It's late."

"They were arguing again. My dad left and then my mom started to yell at me. She was drinking again…"

"What were they arguing about?" I sat up in bed and pulled Sakura closer to me.

"Apparently she caught him with that woman he's been messing around with."

"I'm sorry Sakura." She laid her head on my shoulder.

"It's okay. It doesn't bother me that much anymore."

"You should get home soon. I don't want you to get in trouble for leaving out of the house this late…"

"I can't go back now. Is it alright if I stay here with you for the night?"

"Of course you can stay here."

Sakura crawled in the bed and sat next to me. She was holding onto my hand tightly.

"I'm really thankful for having someone like you in my life, Naruto."

"I feel the same way about you too, Sakura."

Sakura leaned over to me and pressed her lips against mine. I was lost for words and flustered. This was the first time Sakura ever kissed me. This was the first time our lips ever touched. My cheeks were burning. My body felt weird and heart was racing.

"Sakura…"

"I'm sorr-"

Before she could say anything else, I kissed her again. Sakura lips were really soft. She was wearing this strawberry flavored lip gloss. When I ran my tongue against my lips, I could taste it. The lip gloss was really sweet. While I was kissing her, I leaned my body forward against her. Every time I inched my body forward, Sakura's back was closer and closer to touching the bed.

I had her completely pinned against the bed. My body felt like it was moving on its own. There was something on TV that I seen about the things you do if you love someone a lot. The person in the program said that sex was something you do when you love someone. I love Sakura a lot, but maybe we were too young for this. Sex seemed like something older people do, but I love her…

When I looked down to her, Sakura was blushing. Her cheeks were a rosy red color. My body was getting hot just by looking down at her. She just looked so innocent and vulnerable. There was a weird sensation tingling in the bottom half of my body.

"I-I'm sorry, Sakura. I lost control of myself." I could already tell I had an embarrassing look on my face.

"It's okay." Sakura took one of my hands and placed it on her chest. My hand landed directly on top of one of her breasts. "When you love someone things like this are okay, right?"

"Do you really want to do this? I don't want you to rush you into anything."

"Let's do it. When we get older, we're going to be doing things like this anyways. I want you to have my virginity."

"I want you to have mine too."

I went in to kiss her again. Her lips were still sweet from the lip gloss. I removed my hand from her breast and lifted up her shirt. Sakura was wearing a pink strapless bra with a small bow on it. It was adorable. The tingling sensation in my pants grew stronger and my heart was racing faster than before.

My head felt like it was going numb, like all the blood was disappearing from it. I lifted the bra up. Sakura's nipples were really cute. I kissed the bare skin on her chest. She was letting out little moans. All the sounds she was making were driving me crazy. I never did this before. How do I handle this? How do I stop myself from going crazy because like I'm going too.

My lips pressed against her soft skin. I used my tongue to trace a trail of saliva over her breasts. Gently I scraped my tongue against her nipples. Her nipples were stiff. In in the TV program that I seen, it said "if she doing a lot of moaning, her nipples get hard, and pussy gets wet, you're doing something right." Sakura must be really enjoying this, but I had to be sure. She was moaning, her nipples were hard, but was she wet?

Sakura was still wearing the skirt she had on from earlier. All I had to do was lower my hand and slip my hand into her panties. I pressed one of my fingers against her softly. Her body felt like it jerked and clenched up.

"Are you alright?"

"Your hand is cold."

I slid my hand out. My fingers felt like they were wet. I guessing I was doing a good job. This liquid on fingers… I wonder what it tastes like.

I pressed my wet fingers on my tongue, sucking off what was on it. The taste wasn't like anything I ever tasted before. It was different, but it was special because it was from Sakura. It was sorta a light sweet faint taste to it.

"I think this is the part where I stick it in… Are you ready?" I inched my pants down a little exposing my penis. It was rock hard. It ever got this hard before. I watched a couple of porn videos, but this never happened before.

Sakura nodded her head as I slowly started to push myself into her. It hurt a little. It was so tight wrapping around my penis. When I looked down to Sakura to see how she was taking it, she was crying. I stopped pushing in any farther.

"Does it hurt?"

"J-Just a little. I'm so happy. Naruto and I are one now." She was smiling while the tears were running down her cheek.

I kissed her again. I was enjoying every moment with Sakura like this.

This was the first Sakura and I ever did something like this. After that things between us didn't get weird or anything. It felt like we got closer in a sense. We gave each other kisses regularly, once before school started, and again at the end of the day. Whenever she came over, I couldn't help but to kiss her all time. Her lips were soft and I was so deeply in love with her.

It was a few weeks later. Sasuke came to school a few times, but he would just leave early. I didn't get to tell him about what happened between Sakura and I. As my best friend, I thought he should know. He seemed really distant from everyone and everything still.

I continued to focus on school, Sakura, and Sasuke. We were talking about our plans after we graduated. We both knew that we wanted to be together as much as possible when we got older. That's when we got the idea to open up the studio. I loved drawing and painting. Sakura did a lot of painting herself.

It was about a few weeks later and Sakura started acting weird. She was keeping her distance from me and we didn't speak much. She'd just walk pass me and not say a word. There weren't many kisses or hugs being exchanged between us. I was terrified. Maybe she didn't want to be with me anymore or maybe we found someone new.

One day I pulled her aside and asked her what was wrong.

"Sakura… What's wrong with you? You haven't been talking to me and avoiding me lately. What's up?"

"Well… I..."

"You what?"

"I've just been having some problems with my mom and I've haven't been feeling well... My dad finally left… with that woman he's been seeing. I'm thinking about moving out"

"Sakura you know you're always welcome to come live with me."

"It's not that simple. There's something else."

"Something else like what?" I was expecting Sakura to say she found someone else and she was ready to move on from me.

"Well…" She took a long pause. "I've been throwing up a lot… I'm pregnant. I took the test a few days ago. I didn't tell you sooner because I didn't know how you were going to react to it."

"Pregnant?"

"Yeah, pregnant."

"Don't worry. We'll figure something out together. I'm happy." I wrapped my arms around her.

When I went home later on that day, there were a few calls from unknown numbers on the house phone. I checked voicemails on the phone to find out that Jiraiya died. He was in a horrible car accident. The horrible feeling of losing someone I love came back and I completely shut down. I didn't have anyone now, but Sakura, Sasuke, and my unborn child now.

I wanted to call Sakura and tell her about the news I just received, but I didn't do it though. I didn't want her to stress and be too worried about me. Those kind of things weren't good for pregnant women, so I've learn from health in school. So I just decided to go to Sasuke's house. He was the only one I could really talk to right now.

This time when I went to Sasuke's house, he was sitting outside on the porch smoking. I didn't even know Sasuke smoked. He just seemed to be changing so much. I just walked in the gates and sat down next to him. The entire area where he was sitting smelled of cigarette smoke.

"Hey, what's up?"

"I got some bad news today… "

"What happened?"

"Jiraiya got in a car accident and he died."

"I'm sorry to hear that."

"I don't know what I'm going to do now. I have to find a job to keep the bills paid and support Sakura."

"Support Sakura? Support her with what?"

"Sakura is pregnant with my child."

"Pregnant… with your child…" Sasuke looked at me like I was stupid. "When were you even going to tell me about this? I didn't even think you two were that serious."

"We've been dating since we were 15 Sasuke. She just told me about the child today and she's moving out from parents place."

"Where is she even going to stay?"

"With me of course. "

"Double whammy I see." Sasuke flicked his cigarette when he was finished with it. "Well then, you can always work for me."

"Work for you? You own a business Sasuke?"

"Yup. Follow me."

I followed him in the house door a case of stairs leading down. We went down a hallway that was barely lite. Sasuke opened up a door to a room. When the door opened all I seen were men bagging up white powder. Some of them were crushing up pills. Some of them were making stuff fire and glass jars. Like it was some kinda chemistry set. I didn't want to believe what I was seeing.

"Sasuke what is this…?"

"When my dad died, I took on his role in the family business. He was a professional drug dealer and now I am too. If you start selling for me, you won't ever go broke. I can grantee you over ten thousand dollars a week."

"Sasuke I don't know about this… I don't want to get involved in anything like this." Sasuke's dad was a drug dealer? I couldn't even believe it. That would explain why he had so much money and Sasuke is following in his footsteps. I would have expected more out of Sasuke.

"Don't worry Naruto, you'll be safe. All you have to do is deliver the stuff. I'll give you an address, get the money, and give them the stuff."

"That's all?"

"Yup. If anything happens you come back to me and tell me alright. "

"Alright."

From there I started selling and delivering drugs for Sasuke. The money I earned supported me greatly. The more time I spent doing this, the more this horrible side of Sasuke came out. This wasn't the Sasuke I met a long time ago. This was a completely new person.

I had only been selling drugs for Sasuke for a month or so. Sakura was developing a small baby bump. I was excited about our child coming into this world. Even though we were young, I knew everything was going to be okay.

Sakura moved in with me shortly after. I still went to school regularly maintaining my job with Sasuke. I told Sakura I found a job at a junkyard with him. She believed it. Everything was going okay. I didn't think anything from here could go wrong, but I was wrong.

Sakura's mom found out she was pregnant. All she did was yell at Sakura and harass her. There really wasn't a reason why she was angry with her. Sakura was well taken care of with me. I did my best to take care of her. The money I was making with Sasuke was going to buy the studio for us.

One day Sakura called me from the hospital crying. When she called, I was in the middle of a run with Sasuke. The call wasn't anything I would have been expecting. She called and told me she lost the baby. She had a miscarriage. The doctor said it was from too much stress. I so was excited and ready for this child. All that stress from her mother must have been the cause of it. It hurt me even more, that I wasn't there with her when she needed me.

I hung up the phone and banged my fist against the dashboard in the car. Sasuke looked over to me.

"What's wrong with you?"

"Sakura lost baby due to stress."

"I'm sorry."

"I just don't know what to think right now."

"I have something that can help you feel better."

"What is it?"

"These." Sasuke pulled out a bottle of pills out his pocket. He handed them to me and from there I messed up. I took one of the pills in the bottle. I fucked up so bad at the moment. He laid his hand on my thigh. "It's going to get better now."