Hi, everybody. Thanks to my reviewers for leaving me your messages. Would that many followed your example... Because there's still some embarrassment for our favorite trickster to live through. And, if possible, survive... as Thor decides to make himself helpful. :-)

Disclaimer: I do not own Thor, Loki, Odin or any other characters in this story. This fanfic is done for the love of trickster deities, and I do not make money from it.

+++Chapter 5: Merry Bilging in Autumn+++

The brothers met again at breakfast. Thor was already up and about, happily filling his plate with thinly sliced beef. Loki felt sore and hung-over. He'd spent most of the night lying awake, and from the short intervals when he had slipped into troubled sleep, dark dreams lingered and overshadowed the brilliant light of morning.

He chose white bread and a fried egg, which he lifted carefully on to his plate.

Thor ladled scrambled egg cheerfully on his own plate, 'And how are we on this beautiful morning?'

'Hrrmm.'

'That bad, hm?'

'Hrrr-hmm.'

Thor stopped loading his plate with food and looked like a troubled sibling, 'I'm sorry you had an argument with your lady.'

'Who told you? Fandral? Or Volstagg? Doesn't matter, they're both miserable traitors.'

'Do not talk vilely about our friends. I talked to Fandral only after I was told about your escapade by a harpy. A quite ruffled looking harpy, as I'd like to mention.'

'Curst magpies in the disguise of - '

'Guests. They're our guests,' Thor reminded him. But he was not angry. This morning was just too bright for gloomy thoughts. Thor surveyed the buffet, then he helped himself to a generous serving of grilled tomatoes. 'I've got news to cheer you up. Ready? Here they come: I've talked to father. He's not planning to marry you off. Not right away, that is. He wonders how you ever got the idea.'

Loki choked. 'You told him I suspected him of – '

'Well, there was an opportunity and I thought I'd clear the matter for you.' Thor led the way to their seats of honor at the royal table, 'He said he was not even thinking about Jotunheim's throne before he had installed me on Asgard's.'

'You're about to be crowned in less than a week.' Loki did not even try to hide his sarcasm. 'So that leaves my marriage to be scheduled for, let's see – the week after that? A fortnight?'

'Pass me the horseradish dip, will you?' Thor received the bowl and started to pile spicy, mashed horseradish on his scrambled egg. 'You deliberately want to misunderstand, brother,' (more horseradish), 'Father won't suggest that you marry in maybe another one-hundred years or so.' He put down the bowl and stirred eagerly.

'But – ' Loki frowned as all kinds of thoughts wanted to make themselves heard, regarded and put together in a new pattern. Something about all this just didn't make sense... it dawned on him that it never had... just as his brother's idea of a tasty breakfast was, and had always been, beyond good reason. Oh well. It could have been worse. Four-hundred years ago, and Thor would have used the back of his spoon to squish those tomatoes into a juicy pulp...

'Maple syrup on your fried egg?' asked Thor, the little jug in his hand.

Loki was jolted out of his thoughts, 'Oh? Yes, please. No, put more. Put it – '

'Right on top, I know.' Thor hoped the peculiar culinary creation would cheer his brother up. He found it hard to believe, but he'd actually seen it work. 'She's looking over at us.'

No doubt as to whom he was talking of or waving the jug at. To Loki, there was only one female person worth mentioning in all of this court. But he would not show how Thor's news electrified him.

He gave his happily munching brother a level look. 'So?'

'So, I'll have a word or two with her.' Thor pushed back his chair, swallowed his mouthful and stood up.

'What? No! No, no, no, you don't mean to – ' Loki's chair scraped over the floor as he hurried after his brother. Thor approached the Jotuns's table with a set jaw.

The frost giants greeted him with rather cold stares.

'My brother and I bid you a good morning, lady,' said Thor, indicating a bow. Fandral had warned him that she might be a little reluctant to welcome any of them. The blond warrior couldn't relate what Loki had said or done. But it certainly had not pleased the lady. Somehow, it fitted. His brother, Thor was sorry to say, was too much books and scrolls to have the common sense for the art of courting.

That was what he needed - and luckily had - Thor for.

Angrboda whispered to her maid, then looked at Thor as if he were a stranger talking in a foreign language.

'And to you, Prince Thor – Prince Loki,' said Swea.

Thor kept his eyes firmly on the princess. Politics were a matter of eye contact as much as combat skills. 'My brother understands that you are a scholar in the field of wildlife. He wonders, if you might be in possession of the "Four Seasons of the Bilgesnipe".'

'What?' mumbled Loki somewhere behind Thor's shoulder.

Swea conferred with her mistress, then said, 'The lady has not heard of that book.'

'Oh, but she should read it,' said Thor, God of Womanizing, with a winning smile and a flourish movement of his hand. 'Especially volume three: "Merry Bilging in Autumn" '

'Thor, for three spirits's sake – ow!' Thor stepped firmly on Loki's foot to remind him that an older brother's talking was time-out for little brothers and their protest. Loki squealed and fell silent.

Angrboda's mouth twitched. Again, the two women went into a huddle, whispering. Swea delivered her message, 'My lady regrets not to have brought that particular book with her. But if the princes of Asgard were interested in the Compendium of Asgardian Herbs, she could arrange for them to take a look.'

'Take a look? No. My brother - ' (yes, the one who was inhaling like he was seriously going to try and speak up. Thor dug his heel into what had to be the small bones of the bridge of Loki's foot, eliciting a painful gasp and continuing silence) - ' my brother would like to take a copy of – of the second chapter.'

Thor could hear Loki's angry breathing. It was no use. His little brother would probably burst a vessel or magically explode the roof, if Thor continued to ignore him.

Bracing himself for what was to come, Thor turned around.

Loki jumped at him instantly.

'What are you talking about?' he hissed. 'You don't have any idea what the second chapter of the Compendium is about!'

'I don't even know the book,' said Thor with great nonchalance. 'But I know the rules of this kind of battle. I think I am winning this one.'

Loki knew what his brother meant: Books of Old Lore were expensive affairs. Refusing permission to read or copy a particular volume of your library, was considered very bad style. If word of your tight-fistedness were to spread in certain circles, it might easily impair your own access to new texts. Thus, Thor's request was nothing less than a form of blackmailing. Amazing that he should know that stratagem...

'Very well,' said Angrboda, for the first time speaking up herself. 'Your brother may send his writer.'

'My brother does his own writing,' Thor said smoothly. 'If you will allow him to – '

'I allow it,' Angrboda said quickly. 'When?'

Oh, wasn't it delightful, watching the two of them understand and agree with each other so well?

'Thor,' Loki hissed, scandalized.

'Since today's evening will see more merry entertainment in my honor - how about right after breakfast?'

'Thor, I really must insist – '

'I'll have Swea observe the door.' Angrboda winked her eye at Thor. 'And the window.'

'Your wisdom matches your beauty.' Thor nodded in greeting and started to return to the royal table. He took the long way around, passing by the buffet once more.

'Well, that's what I call breaking down open doors,' he remarked when they were out of immediate hearing range.

'I'm going to break down. Screaming,' hissed Loki. 'What do you think you're doing?'

In passing, Thor helped himself to a chicken wing from a platter, 'I fixed a date for you.'

'How can you keep eating?' complained Loki. 'I've got a date with - with a Jotun!'

'Well, that's what you set out to gain when you scaled that ladder tonight, didn't you?'

'That was before I learned that mother forbade Angrboda talk to me.'

Thor turned around, chicken wing in his hand, 'Oh. I didn't know that.'

'Your rashness has got me in a mess, brother, a terrible mess – ' whined Loki.

Thor stopped and slid his free hand behind Loki's neck. His eyes bore into his brother's, demanding Loki's full attention. 'Stop this foolish complaint, Loki. It's not that bad. In fact, it's no worse than some of the things you put me through, having me cover up for you.'

'I never had you - ' Loki began with righteous indignation, but Thor's finger pressed into his skin, silencing him.

'Like, with you drinking and me taking the headache. You did that again last night, didn't you. So you could evade Heimdall's watchful glance.' Thor spoke with a good-natured smile on his lips and in his eyes. He released Loki's neck and sat on his chair. 'If the situation feels like a mess to you, then that's only because this time you're not the one in charge. Hogun was right: Looks like you've met your match at last.'

'My match? Thor, she's Jotun!'

'And we found out that you're not going to marry her. So, for as long as it lasts it might be an interesting experience.' Thor punched his brother's shoulder and winked at him conspiratorially. 'And you are after interesting experiences, are you not, brother?'

Anger, white-hot and all-consuming, instantly replaced Loki's anxiety. 'So, because Angrboda is Jotun, she's good enough for an affair, but not for an honorable relationship?' He clutched the back of his chair. 'A past-time for an Aesir to slake his lusts on and satiate his desire for novelty and exotism. Is that how you see her?'

Thor munched on a mouthful of horseradished scrambled egg and made a noncommittal gesture.

'Talk to me, brother,' Loki demanded, fuming. 'Pray, share with me your reason for smiling so.'

Thor swallowed and said, 'I'm smiling because I've never seen you feel so protective about a woman before. Now, sit down. I can't eat looking up.'

Oblivious of his own, remarkable obedience, Loki slid on to his chair. He picked up his spoon and stabbed at the maple syrup-doused fried egg, 'I'm not feeling protective. And she's not a woman. She's - I mean, I – I am – '

'At a loss for words, brother? Well, if that's not unusual?'

'I will not be questioned by you, brother. I'm done eating.' Loki flung his spoon on the plate. Unfortunately, it gave a loud, clanking sound that made everyone look up. Loki returned the expectant gazes with seething anger. 'I'm taking my leave. My king, my queen, a good morning to you – ' He bowed to the royal couple who were just entering, then he stormed out. Odin and Frigga did not betray how baffled they were. But their gazes swept to their other son who was still seated. And because they did, the rest of the breakfasters looked at Thor as well.

'A little argument among brothers.' Thor gave the assembly a smile and a shrug. 'I understand he was not in agreement with my intent to squish those tomatoes.'

He thought of how his brother owed him for covering up like this.

And he grabbed his spoon in his fist, and he squished them.

This time, Angrboda answered the door herself.

'I wasn't sure you'd come,' she said as a welcome.

'I had no choice. My brother – ' Loki stopped. 'The one you think should have mercy on me...'

'Jotuns will say mean things,' she said. 'It's hard to control.'

Somehow, she made way for him; somehow, he found he had taken a step or two forward and was standing in the anteroom with her. Swea was one step behind her mistress. Her warriors were out of sight, which was fine with him. Even in their Asgardian disguise he felt uncomfortable in their presence.

'Please. You don't have to explain anything,' Loki said. 'Especially not the messed-up conversation of last night. In fact, I've come to apologize for my misconduct.'

'But I want you to understand these things,' Angrboda said solemnly. 'A Jotun will turn words into talons – and when he can get them in, he'll twist. We're monsters, if we're given a chance to inflict hurt.'

'We?' Loki raised his eyebrows.

'My people. Jotuns. It runs in the family.'

'Nice family.'

'You should meet them. Someday.'

The silence they had been trying to avoid fell. It was not as embarrassing as Loki had feared. But it needed to be broken anyway. He had not come to stand here and lose himself in a frost giant's fake green eyes. Not when there were witnesses, a maid and warriors who were unseen yet probably overheard every word that was spoken.

Loki cleared his throat. 'Get your coat,' he said.

'Are we going for a walk?'

'Herbs are best studied where they grow.'

'Grow? You mean we're going to see real flowers?' Suddenly excited, Angrboda slipped into the cape Swea held up for her.

'That is the plan, yes.' Loki produced a pouch and poured some honey-colored dust in his palm.

'Ground amber,' he explained. 'I've put a spell on it. We don't want Heimdall to spy on us, do we?'

Angrboda studied the fine dust with interest, 'How's that spell going to hinder him?'

'It's a catalyst for shape-shifting magic. It will make Heimdall believe in the illusion.' Loki sprinkled her. 'Can you do an image of Sif?'

'Why her?'

'It is not uncommon for her to be in the presence of my brother or me. Seeing her leave the city with me won't arouse suspicion.'

'No problem, then. But I'll do it only if you put on your impressive gala.'

'Why? This was meant to be an informal -'

'Exactly my point. It's uncommon to wear one's gala armor to a rendezvous. People will think we're on our way to another reception and mind their own business.' She smiled. 'Besides, am I wrong to assume that you'll feel more comfortable dealing with this... situation when you're dressed formally?'

Loki knew she had a point. His father had been right, too. Somehow, Angrboda did have a way of knowing his thoughts, although he was sure that no real mind-reading was involved. It was more like, well, like they were perhaps more of a kind than Loki had deemed possible with someone who was not his brother – or not even Asgardian, for that matter.

Reaching out magically, Loki called his green cape and his helmet to himself. As they materialized in a shimmer of gold, Angrboda changed her own form to look like Sif.

'I'm set,' she announced, grabbing the valkyre's spear. 'Reyk, Garek, Tjor, I'm off, seeing some flowers!'

The warriors acknowledged in their own tongue from another room. Loki was surprised. He had spent some thought on the problem of how to disguise them as they walked in public. Surely, they would not let their mistress leave with an Asgardian, even if that Asgardian was an Aesir prince? But it looked like they were going to do just that. Swea wished her mistress a pleasant day. She even managed to keep any trace of sarcasm out of her voice. Angrboda slid her hand in the crook of Loki's arm.

'I'll only do that if no one's watching,' she said.

Loki took one step, then another. No one was moving to join them.

The Jotun beside him was warm and alive and vibrant with excitement. He slid his hand gently behind her back.

Still, no one protested, no one followed.

It was going to be just the two of them.

Fandral went to the stables to tend to both, his steed and his camaraderie with the helpful stable boys. For the moment he was alone, though, so he put down the crock of mead he'd brought as a thank-you gift for his accomplices and entered the stall with his horse. He stood beside the bay stroking its mane and feeding it apples from a large basket in the stable aisle.

Before long, he heard someone else busy themselves with the fruits. He was just about to look out of the stall, when a voice said, 'The frost giants's presence in Asgard is very unfortunate. Their natural resistance to our magic could jeopardize our entire mission.'

'Ah, relax,' said another voice, 'Even though the Lady Angrboda and her entourage will not be influenced by our spells, why would King Laufey's people choose to interfere on Asgard's behalf? They are no friends or allies of Odin's, either. We're doing them a favor.'

'It might seem so, at first. But will Jotunheim really welcome our dark brothers with open arms as they return from exile beyond the spheres?'

Look who's talking treason here! But careful, warrior! Careful! Fandral peered round the corner: There were two Fairies stooped over the basket and picking up apples as they talked in hushed voices. They chose with diligence, keeping only the juciest, ripest fruits and putting back all that were dented or less red in color. Fandral wondered: Had the sumptuous breakfast buffet not appeased their appetites?

And hadn't there been another guy, a self-proclaimed leader - ?

Fandral's faithful horse gave him The Whinny. The whinny that meant "look-out behind you, you deaf idiot".

Fandral spun around.

Ah. There the missing Fairy was!

Hovering, holding up the crock of mead.

Bringing it down on Fandral's head.

Loki took Angrboda to the limits of Asgard's great city and beyond that to a small river that flowed through a landscape of green trees and flowers. Angrboda was enrapt. The colors of the blossoming meadows were nothing short of wonders to her. She marveled at a great weeping willow, the hanging branches and the leaves. The white and pinkish daisies made her clap her hands, delighted. She went to the edge of the water and put her hand in.

'It's not frozen,' she said. 'Look. There are fish.'

'Trouts,' said Loki, seeing the colorful fish that hung in the stream with only sparse movements of their tails.

Angrboda grew a blade of ice out of her right hand and stabbed at the water. She pulled out a fish.

'It's so much easier this way,' she stated, killing the trout by freezing it. 'In Jotunheim, you have to dig a hole into the ice, before you can go fishing. That green stuff, is it safe for sitting on?'

'It's grass. I don't know about its various purposes, but sitting on certainly ranks high on the list.' Loki beckoned her to join him. She did, but with the attitude of someone expecting an angry viper to hide nearby. Reluctantly, he put his arm around her. She leaned on his shoulder. Looking down, Loki saw that her hair was blond again, not an image of Sif, but the disguise she had chosen to wear for her stay in this realm.

'The answer is no,' she said, without looking up.

'What's the question?'

'Well, aren't you just dying to see me in my true form, nine foot tall, blue skin, red eyes? I couldn't show you. I gave my word not to do that around here.'

'You also gave your word not to be with me,' he reminded her.

'That's different.'

'In what way?'

'Breaking your word once is just what a monster like me would do,' she said. 'But only a stupid fool would risk the anger of both, the king and the queen.'

Loki let that pass as quite true. He thought that it was probably exactly what was going to happen, the king and the queen both being enraged by their disobedience. Angrboda, however, did not seem worried at all. Leaning against him so close he could feel her breathe, she grew a flat shard of ice from her hand and looked through it at the willow.

'Look,' she said and, snuggling even closer, held out her hand in front of his face. He looked through the ice as he was told. Sunlight and ice made a nice caleidoscope and the shifting, changing shades of green were a pretty sight.

'How do you create all that ice?' Loki asked, interested. 'How do you shape it?'

'I will it to grow.' Angrboda touched her hand to the ground beside her. Ice spread from her hand like ripples on water. The grass was covered with rime in an instant. The frost continued to spread and reached the willow. It raced up the tree, turning each single leaf into a gem of crystalline green, while the river froze into a glacier of blue ice. 'When you're Jotun, the ice is part of your soul. All you do is let it flow out of you. It's sort of like exhaling, and just as natural.'

Loki looked around: Within seconds the whole landscape around them had turned into a picturesque winter idyll. 'Amazing.'

'All frost giants have that power. It's - '

'Running in the family?' he supplied when she did not finish her sentence.

Angrboda looked at him with no mockery at all, 'Loki, have you ever been to Jotunheim? Do you know how it looks like? How my people live?'

'I know that it is a place of eternal winter and great darkness. Snow fields and mountains of ice, for eleven months. Devastating floods in the twelfth month that change the face of the landscape once the frost returns.'

'And a sickly pale sun that cannot warm the ground enough to bring forth something as beautiful as this,' Angrboda leaned forward to take a frozen daisy between her fingers.

'The frost giants live in homes of ice,' Loki went on, 'Sometimes they build them from ice blocks, sometimes they carve straight into the side of a cliff or frozen waterfall. There are whole palaces made of ice.'

'But most of the structures are crumbling and in the process of decay.' Angrboda ripped off the daisy's blossom. 'It is all we can do nowadays; protect ourselves. But it was not always like this. You see, Loki, there was an energy source, a magical stone that gave off infinite light and warmth. In its light, my home, my people, my land thrived...'

'It was lost?'

'Taken away. So that Jotunheim would never again rise to its old glory.' Another daisy perished, frozen and mutilated. 'It's a winner's privilege, I guess, to do that to the defeated.'

'Odin,' whispered Loki. 'Odin took the light away from your home.'

'He did. He still does. There is a vault, deep under Asgard's glorious palace, where the relics of Allfather's victories are kept. The Jotun energy source is kept there, locked in a casket.'

He knew. He remembered. When he was a boy, Odin had taken him and Thor to the vault. He showed his sons the casket and told them the story of the both of them being born to become kings. A fist seemed to clench in Loki's stomach: A tale so pretty, and so untrue.

'Angrboda,' said Loki, trying to keep his voice level. 'Tell me. Do you intend to steal the casket before you return home?'

She turned in his arm so that she could look at him, 'Well, actually I told you all of this because I hoped you would help me.'

Loki stared at her, stunned by the nonchalance of her suggestion to commit high treason.

'Loki, my people need this energy source.'

'You suggest that I betray my father?'

'I ask you to save my people's lives. You know this palace, the hidden corridors, the places that are too dark even for Heimdall to look into. Lead us to the vault, and show us a safe way out. No Asgardian need get hurt, and hundreds of Jotuns will live.' She moved to lean on his shoulder again. 'But if that is not enough argument to justify the deed, you can always claim that I forced you to do it. Odin will believe it. Your brother will believe it. It's just what they think a Jotun would do.'

'Will you?' asked Loki, wary of her every movement. 'Try to force me to commit treason?'

'I would not force you to do anything,' Angrboda said truthfully. 'I wouldn't know how.'

And she reached out her hand, and although he pulled back quickly, she grabbed hold of a horn and covered his helmet in ice.

The freezing cold hit Loki like a punch to the head. A sharp pain pierced his inner ears as if they had been run through with long needles of ice. As he gasped for breath, the ice seemed to fill the cavities in his facial bones. A frozen fist seemed first to compress his brain, then explode it outward into darkness.

Angrboda watched Loki pass out and thought that she had never before seen someone so ignorant of his own powers. This damned cloaking spell had become so much part of him that he reacted like a stupid Asgardian.

She was nice enough to catch him before he hit the ground - 'Easy. Don't kill yourself bashing in your head.' - and haunched beside him. She went through his pockets and found the pouch with the ground amber. Stowing it away, she got to her feet. She was not concerned for Loki. Even though there were ice crystals clinging to his very eyelashes - her Jotun magic that had made his helmet crumble into frozen dust had not hurt his body, not permanently. He had lost consciousness only because he had picked up a long time ago that that was what a decent, warm-blooded, stupid Asgardian would do. Sooner or later, some other Asgardian would show up and make a fuss over how lucky he was to be still alive. They'd put their precious prince in a hot bath, thaw him up, tuck him in and treat him to hot beverages until he was all toasty again.

'I bet, if and when you should ever set out for Jotunheim, they'll tell you to dress warmly,' she said to him. 'But thanks for showing me how to avoid Heimdall's attention.'

+++End of Chapter 5+++